American Penises in Danger

[JMHX]

A renowned U.S. scientist who has documented fertility and sex changes -- including decreasing penis size -- due to environmental contamination says he wouldn't apply pesticides on his own lawn.

Delivering a special series of lectures this week at the University of Western Ontario, Louis Guillette has been drawn into London's lawn-care debate during question periods and talk-show interviews.

"The use of these compounds just for cosmetic reasons, just because you don't want to make dandelion wine from your yard or whatever, I think is inappropriate," Guillette, who is associate dean for research at the University of Florida, said in a lecture yesterday at UWO's Schulich School of Medicine and Dentistry.

Horror

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The Ants have begun their return salvo.

[poxpower]

Most people shouldn't even HAVE lawns.

People are retarded, no doubt. We're starting to plant Thym ( whatever I don't know what its called in english) on our yard.
That shit spreads like wildfire, grows in SAND, requires no care and smells good when you walk on it.

No need to mow it or weed it, it kills every weed that dares try to grow between its dense evil smelly foliage of doom.

People are getting had so damn much with this lawn shit. They get sold treatment plans and bags of pesticide, and waste tons of often treated and clean water just to make it grow. And what do the idiots do with it?
Nothing. They go to work all day, come home, sit in front of the TV and leave for Cacun as soon as they can.

Whatever. They don't deserve a penis.

[SolInvictus]

At 5/1/06 07:39 PM, SevenSeize wrote:

:...

i'd be amazed if you actually got honest feedback

[No-one-inparticular]

At 5/1/06 07:39 PM, SevenSeize wrote: Well, I don't have a penis, but even if I did I wouldn't be too worried. I'm not a huge fan of poison and I weed my garden by hand. I also squish bugs as opposed to spraying them. We need to take a NG BBS survey. Measure your penis (in inches preferably), record if you use pesticides, then post here.

My pecker is six inches and 2 centimeters long.

I don't use pesticides.

[MoralLibertarian]

At 5/1/06 07:50 PM, Steel_Reserve wrote: My pecker is six inches and 2 centimeters long.

I don't use pesticides.

I didn't see that one coming. Wait to mix American with Metric.

[HighlyIllogical]

At 5/1/06 07:39 PM, SevenSeize wrote: Well, I don't have a penis, but even if I did I wouldn't be too worried.

Chances are, it's not a significant risk of damage or potential problems of any sort. I'd be more worried about potential carcinogenic effects.

[darkfiretime1]

Whatever was found from this study, I have no interest in it.

[Judicator-Aldais]

my dong is 2 inches and i use pesticides. that normal right. i mean 2 inches.
no but seriously thats just overhyped bs. its like drinking out of plastic bottles makes you more of a woman. http://atmizzou.miss..u/jun03/plastics.htm

. not going to happen. the human body is not so easily corrupted.

[JMHX]

At 5/2/06 12:45 AM, Judicator_Aldais wrote: my dong is 2 inches and i use pesticides. that normal right. i mean 2 inches.
no but seriously thats just overhyped bs. its like drinking out of plastic bottles makes you more of a woman. http://atmizzou.miss..u/jun03/plastics.htm

. not going to happen. the human body is not so easily corrupted.

Well, when you get a study peer-reviewed and published, you can contest it.

[mayeram]

At 5/1/06 07:39 PM, SevenSeize wrote: We need to take a NG BBS survey. Measure your penis (in inches preferably), record if you use pesticides, then post here.

What do you do if you have an innie? (and i dont mean women...)

[JoS]

Black people dont have lawns, and if they do they certainly do not have the time or money to put down all these chemicals. Now we know why black men have larger penises. Mystery solved.

[MoralLibertarian]

At 5/2/06 12:46 AM, JMHX wrote: Well, when you get a study peer-reviewed and published, you can contest it.

That's right. No one on NG is allowed to contest this because they haven't written scholarly papers that have been peer-reviewed. Therefore, this study should be read as a gospel.

[PARAGON-pvp]

time for something completly random in politics:
george bush is old

thanks for watching....

[RedScorpion]

At 5/2/06 11:07 AM, JoS wrote: Black people dont have lawns, and if they do they certainly do not have the time or money to put down all these chemicals. Now we know why black men have larger penises. Mystery solved.

Look who's on top now, eh?

...Damn you Bill Cosby!

At 5/1/06 07:39 PM, SevenSeize wrote: Measure your penis (in inches preferably), record if you use pesticides, then post here.

Pervert. I see what you're trying to do...

Do you want a picture as well?

rofl @:)

[SkunkyFluffy]

This just means that more men are going to have to learn how to actually use their penises, instead of relying on their sheer size to wow women into ecstasy.

So although the idea of pesticides shriveling penises terrifies me, I suppose it could be a boon. And it would certainly cut down on all the obnoxious bastards who are so impressed with their own tackle.

[Desert-Drifter]

At 5/1/06 07:39 PM, SevenSeize wrote: Well, I don't have a penis, but even if I did I wouldn't be too worried. I'm not a huge fan of poison and I weed my garden by hand. I also squish bugs as opposed to spraying them. We need to take a NG BBS survey. Measure your penis (in inches preferably), record if you use pesticides, then post here.

sry can't measure right now i'm in school. besides you never specified what state the penis needs to be measured in.

[Penal-Disturbance]

Hopefully it will only apply to fundies and neo-cons, so they won't be able to spread their hate, bile and selfishness onto another generation.

[losiglow]

I call total bull on this one. Penis size decreased by pesticides? Bull-o-knee. First of all, they'd have to compare penis sizes of a fairly large number of men who use pesticides of every race, age, etc. and compare it to an equal number of men of the same demographics that don't use pesticides. Just doing this would be difficult enough. If they did find any difference at all it would probably be something like .02 inches or something lame like that. Dumb.

[JMHX]

Thank god you got that degree in biology and chemistry, and solved this big problem for us.

[Desert-Drifter]

so it's not going to shrink? oh, praise the lord.

[Politics]

I knew that if I applied pesticides with my penis it would burn like a whore, I just didn't know it would get smaller, too. Good research. You saved me some pain and suffering.

[Raptorman]

At 5/1/06 07:39 PM, SevenSeize wrote: Measure your penis

Only one way you are going to find out. Well two, if you catch me wearing a kilt.

[lapis]

At 5/2/06 01:55 PM, Desert-Drifter wrote: so it's not going to shrink? oh, praise the lord.

It's probably not going the shrink - the hypothesis in his 1995 study said that the toxins affected the development of the male reproductive organs in alligator embryos. In one lake (Apopka) they found that the alligators had high concentrations of some anti-androgenic substance in their fat than in some other lake (Woodruff), so they caught 40 male alligators in one lake and 54 in the other and compared penis size. Androgens like testosterone are considered to play an important role in the development of the penis. The alligators in lake Apopka had 24% smaller penises than the ones in Woodruff - they apparently came to statistically significant conclusions using ANCOVA.

The sample size was prety small but the 2006 article says that "a followup study by another scientist" with 5,000 alligators came to similar conclusions. If anti-androgens harm penis development in alligators then the same might be true for humans. He didn't prove it to be harmful to humans, he just made it plausible.

[MoralLibertarian]

At 5/2/06 01:35 PM, Penal_Disturbance wrote: Hopefully it will only apply to fundies and neo-cons, so they won't be able to spread their hate, bile and selfishness onto another generation.

I'm sorry Penal_Disturbance, but if you haven't noticed, neocons and fundamentalists procreate at a much more rapid pace than liberals. Particularly fundamentalists; they have a ton of children.

So their hate, bile, and selfishness is not only going to be spread onto the next generation, but will in all likelihood dominate the next generation. Scared?

[RedSkunk]

At 5/1/06 07:45 PM, -poxpower- wrote: Most people shouldn't even HAVE lawns.

People are retarded, no doubt. We're starting to plant Thym ( whatever I don't know what its called in english) on our yard.

Thyme? It's a mint.

A yard of mint? You're fucked up.

[Raptorman]

At 5/2/06 03:10 PM, red_skunk wrote:

Thyme? It's a mint.

Ah yes, I recall being so poor that the only thing I ate was spices loaned to me by a neighbor. I was truly living on borrowed thyme.

*ducks to avoid the flying shoes*

[lapis]

At 5/2/06 03:06 PM, MoralLibertarian wrote: I'm sorry Penal_Disturbance, but if you haven't noticed, neocons and fundamentalists procreate at a much more rapid pace than liberals. Particularly fundamentalists; they have a ton of children.

So their hate, bile, and selfishness is not only going to be spread onto the next generation, but will in all likelihood dominate the next generation. Scared?

You're correct, however, hippies live in cleaner areas because they're more environmentally conscious. Therefore, they're less exposed to anti-androgenic substances which entails that their children probably get bigger penises. So we'll see only one generation with a lot of conservatives - the females of this new generation will go for the male hippie offspring since they have bigger shlongs. In fact, I strongly believe that these hippies will have outbread the conservatives in a mere hundred years.

[MoralLibertarian]

At 5/2/06 03:14 PM, lapis wrote: You're correct, however, hippies live in cleaner areas because they're more environmentally conscious.

Wrong. The reason "hippies" are more environmentally conscious is because they tend to live in big cities with lots of pollution, whereas conservatives and/or fundamentalists tend to live in suburbs/rural areas where it doesn't seem like it is as big of a problem. So, you're pretty much wrong. Darn, huh?

[lapis]

At 5/2/06 03:17 PM, MoralLibertarian wrote:

At 5/2/06 03:14 PM, lapis wrote: You're correct, however, hippies live in cleaner areas because they're more environmentally conscious.

Wrong. The reason "hippies" are more environmentally conscious is because they tend to live in big cities with lots of pollution, whereas conservatives and/or fundamentalists tend to live in suburbs/rural areas where it doesn't seem like it is as big of a problem. So, you're pretty much wrong. Darn, huh?

The guy in the article menioned pesticides as a source of anti-androgens. People in cities don't use pesticides unless they have some sort of odd fetish. You use pesticides if you live on a farm and that's where a good deal of the conservative voters reside. The best place to live if you want well-endowed descendants seems to be a place in the open where the residents don't use toxins and pesticides: hippie communes. They may be small in number, but when women realise that these hippie kids have gargantuan dicks in about 20 years I wouldn't be surprised if one male hippie child could impregnate about 30 to 50 women annually.

[Gunter45]

At 5/2/06 03:26 PM, lapis wrote: I wouldn't be surprised if one male hippie child could impregnate about 30 to 50 women annually.

I thought that's what happened anyway...