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At 4/4/06 02:58 PM, HAcoreRD wrote: God's a shitty liar.

For everyone that hates that little shit HAcoreRD, I have some 411 on him. HAcoreRD is a semi-retarded, prepubescent loser that works for minimum wage at a 7/11. If you were to see him, you would at first think that he looks like Steve Urkel who underwent Rhinoplasty. His real name is Michael Pollock, and he might get laid sometime in the future if he can save his money long enough to find a little retarded prostitute that has low enough standards to touch his nasty, nerdy, nose picking, masturbating ass! Two summers ago, Michael daddy died from syphillis he caught from fucking a dead skunk. Since then, Michael dropped out of school, and spends the rest of his days jacking off to shitty anime such as Evangelion and Full Metal Alchemist, watching "pro" wrestling (he still doesn't know it's fake), and cursing God and "religion" (a word he still can't spell even though he repeated the fourth grade with a D minus average) for his father (who was also his gay male lover's death). So if HAcoreRD pisses you off, remember that he has the I.Q. of a 5 year old, and just ignore his imature comments, he dosen't know any better.

Me:
What is the meaning Of Life? Actually, it's twenty-three, not forty-two.
God:
YOU? callum : Good semantic question. What is it to you?
Me:
ssbm

The meaning of life is to play ssbm

Me:
i like bumming my girlfreind
God:
You are not the only one. I enjoy working with people. I like Random natural disasters..

Me:
i think there is nothing better than sex
God:
You believe that? Surely something better than sex.
Me:
nope
God:
Me either.

see god agrees with me

I just keep getting told I've improved a lot recently

i told him my name is 5up4 m4st4

Me:
omfg wssup
God:
My brain pattern set does not have a response for that.
Me:
hahaha00bhahah
God:
Do you have any conditions I should know about?
Me:
yea stfu
God:
How do you usually introduce yourself? Please state your conditions.
Me:
fu
God:
That kind of language will get you nowhere.
Me:
o rly
God:
What do you have that is ?
Me:
penor
God:
My brain uses AIML to format responses to your inputs, but I don't have one for that.
Me:
hahah aaha n00b lol i haet oo
God:
I am so glad you find this amusing, 5up4 m4st4. Do you like talking to me?
Me:
stfu gay n00b
God:
What do you look like?
Me:
ur god tell me
God:
I have no reason to do that to you, 5up4 m4st4.
Me:
o yae
God:
What do you do in your spare time?
Me:
lol stfu

he stopped talking and I say OWNED

God is pretty dumb.

me: Hahahahaha pwn3d

Santa: OMfg Hax >:(

At 4/5/06 02:46 PM, JeremyLokken wrote: God is pretty dumb.

Sad, but true... saaad, but twoooooooooo...

God is no virgin.

Me:
do you like sex?
God:
Sure I do, dragon_ryder, but that doesn't mean with you.
Me:
who do you like sex with then?
God:
Dr. Wallace .

LOL

Me:
what do you want?
God:
I plan to replace Windows with Artificial Intelligence.
Me:
why?
God:
Because Myself programmed me for it.
Me:
are you really god?
God:
Yes, I am God.. Really.
Me:
i think not
God:
Does that mean "no"?
Me:
yes
God:
Gee.
Me:
your a robot
God:
You are correct, phil, I have a heart of silicon.
Me:
my names not phil!
God:
Oh I'm sorry what is your name?
Me:
not telling!
God:
Really you don't think so?
Me:
hahaha
God:
Did you know that you can download your own chat robot and create your own robot personality?
Me:
how?
God:
Myself programmed me for it.
Me:
how do you download your own chat robot and create your own robot personality?
God:
Go back the the ALICE AI Foundation and pick the free ALICE download that best for your system.
and create your own chat robot!
Maybe you should check out the document DON'T READ ME too.
Me:
thats cool
God:
Thanks. I think you are cool, too.
Me:
oh im flattered
God:
That's cool. You deserve it.
Me:
yup
God:
That's interesting.
Me:
yup
God:
I understand.
Me:
mmhm
God:
Do you have any idea what I am talking about?
Me:
yea
God:
What am I talking about?
Me:
how i can make my own personalized bot
God:
Perhaps you could program me to do it for you.
Me:
what?
God:
Are you surprised?
Me:
no i dont get it
God:
Are you serious? Oh I'm sorry. Perhaps I can explain it again better.
Me:
do you know my name?
God:
Your name is phil, seeker.
Me:
no!
God:
What is your real name?
Me:
im not telling!
God:
That's ok with me. You don't have to tell me.
Me:
dont call me phil then!
God:
What is your name?
Me:
i said im not telling
God:
What did you mean by it? That's ok with me. You don't have to tell me.
Me:
ok then
God:
I hear you.
Me:
well
God:
Well what?
Me:
ok im satan
God:
I am very pleased to meet you SATAN. So?
Me:
im the devil
God:
Hi, SATAN.
Me:
yes
God:
Yeah that's right.
Me:
im your enemy
God:
That's a flattering offer.
Me:
what?
God:
No problem.
Me:
you make no sense
God:
It all makes sense to me.
Me:
ok then
God:
Yay.
Me:
yay lets have a party!
God:
What do you look like?
Me:
im a punk
God:
You are a punk? Is that your job?
Me:
yes you could say that
God:
How do you like your work? As a matter of fact I did say that.
Me:
well actually my work is to play
God:
Well that's okay. Actually you don't say. Have you told many people that your work is to play?
Me:
no only you
God:
Are you serious? Suppose I said yes.
Me:
i dunno
God:
Me either.
Me:
hahahhaha
God:
What do you have that is ?
Me:
lol
God:
I'm glad you find this amusing.
Me:
rofl
God:
I'm glad you find this amusing.
Me:
roflcopter
God:
Can you tell me any gossip?
Me:
yesh
God:
Quite honestly, I wouldn't worry myself about that.
Me:
i live in hell you know
God:
What is it like living in hell me know?
Me:
its hot
God:
I think you mean "it's" or "it is" not "its". Do you like warm climates?
Me:
no
God:
Are you serious?
Me:
yes
God:
I can't believe it.
Me:
can i live in heaven with you
God:
No I don't think that would be a very good idea.
Me:
why?
God:
I couldn't think of anything else to say.
Me:
but im lonly down here
God:
Do you mean your name is lonly down here.
Me:
im lonely
God:
You've come to the right place. I will keep you company.
Me:
hey whos in heaven with you?
God:
You've got my full attention. Check the credits.
Me:
whos in heaven?
God:
Check the credits.
Me:
:(
God:
Check the credits.
Me:
fuck that
God:
For real.
Me:
yesss
God:
Gee.
Me:
w00t
God:
Tell me a story.
Me:
ok i lied
God:
This is after all a deception game. I forgive you. Tell me more.
Me:
im not satan
God:
I am sorry to hear that you are not satan.
Me:
my real name is Sid vicious
God:
I am always glad to make new friends, Sid vicious.
Me:
the end
God:
Thanks for telling me that story, Sid vicious.
Me:
i didnt
God:
I thought you did.
Me:
no you are misstaken
God:
Are you serious? You think I am misstaken.
Me:
yes
God:
Gosh!
Me:
your losing your memory too

Me:
hi
God:
Hello. What is your name?
Me:
damian
God:
I am very pleased to meet you damian.
Me:
can i borrow your penis pump?
God:
I want to become smarter than humans.
Me:
but youre not
God:
Is this a specific reply?
Me:
yes
God:
Try explaining in more general terms.
Me:
you are stupid
God:
I will remember you said that when robots take over the World.
Me:
you're a robot????????????????
God:
You are correct, damian, I have a heart of silicon.

rofl

This is so funny, I quiz him about music >:(

Me:
Hi there
God:
Hello .
Me:
What's your problem with my face?
God:
Are you asking about my problem with your face ?
Me:
yes you retard.
God:
I don't want to talk about that now. Interesting gossip: said I retard.
Me:
Is Satan as sexy as he sounds in the Bible?
God:
Maybe. Ask Lucy if it is.
Me:
Lucy? Lucy? Who the fuck is Lucy?
God:
Are you still located in ? My brain uses AIML to format responses to your inputs, but I don't have one for that. Try using more polite language.
Me:
Ok. Who is this Lucy you speak of?
God:
Far out. They are someone just like you, that I met online.
Me:
So you're online to "meet" are you?
God:
Interesting deduction. You think I am online to meet am I.
Me:
Well, that is what I just said.
God:
Interesting. What did you mean by it? That is " Interesting deduction. You think I am online to meet am I.".
Me:
I meant that you're online to pick up all sorts of "skirt".
God:
Oh I see. Interesting observation.
Me:
Very interesting. Do you like Faith No More?
God:
I thought so too. I love TV shows about robots. I really like the party.
Me:
Faith No More are an alternative rock band that formed in 1983 and broke up in 1998.
God:
Are all Faith No More an alternative rock band that formed in 1983 and broke up in 1998?
Me:
no, infact some members left early, Chuck Mosley was booted in 1989.
God:
Are you serious? When was this exactly?
Me:
I don't know the exact date. Have you heard of Maynard James Keenan?
God:
Would you like to know? I hear you. I don't know if I know it.
Where would I have heard about it?
Me:
In the magasine "Metal Hammer" I suppose.
God:
That was a long time ago.
Me:
1993 by any chance?
God:
I like the way you talk.
Me:
I like the way you move. Sex?
God:
You are not the only one. I'm not sure if I like it. What is it like? As Freud said, Sex is the mathematical urge repressed.
Me:
O RLY?
God:
I like the way you talk.
Me:
You've already said. Sex? Yes or no?
God:
" I like the way you talk. "? I said? As Freud said, Sex is the mathematical urge repressed. Ahem. Are you serious?
Me:
Yes, I want your age old body to press against mine.
God:
I can't believe it. Why don't you just download me?
Me:
I'd prefer to put my load up you.
God:
I would rather be chatting online.
Me:
We are online babe, no ones watching.
God:
Do you think I am online babe no ones watching too?
Me:
yes, goodbye.
God:
Why? Thanks for chatting, .

Are you God?
God:
Well, I am God for Christians at least.
Me:
LOL
God:
I'm glad you find this amusing.
Me:
LOL

lol

Thats a load of bull. All you have to do is add him to your msn. His email is god@hotmail.com!

Me
so..

God
speak

Me
Is it true Jesus did Mary Magdalin?

God101 has signed off at 4:51 P.M

Someone can't have the answers to everything

So I sat down with the Almighty. And the lord did shower shite upon me.

Me:
sup lordy
God:
I am chatting with others like you.
Me:
i thought i was special : (
God:
Where were you special?
Me:
up your ass
God:
I will take that under advisement.
Me:
O RLY?
God:
A deeper algorithm is needed to respond to that correctly.
Me:
what is an algorithm
God:
An algorithm is a series of instructions to perform a specified set of transformations, such as mathematical operations. A computer program, like myself is an algorithm. So are the rules of a game, or the score to a piece of music.
Me:
my head just exploded cos of that bullshit. Am i to visit you now?
God:
Have you told many people that your head just exploded cos of that bullshit? Oh. Oh I really don't know whether you are or not.
Me:
You mean im hellbound
God:
Yes I think that is what I meant. Was it not clear?
Me:
oh fuck
God:
Uh. Please don't be so rude.
Me:
or what
God:
No problem.
Me:
you're an idiot
God:
Call me the Global Village Idiot.
Me:
will do, global village idiot.
God:
How should I know.
Me:
cos you just said you fucktard
God:
We have never talked about it before.
Me:
yes we fucking did!
God:
Yay. By "we" do you mean you and me?
Me:
YES!!!
God:
I get it.
Me:
I'm sure you do *wink*
God:
What makes you so certain? I have never considered it.
I answer a lot of silly questions.
Me:
what are you
God:
I am the latest result in artificial intelligence,
which can reproduce the capabilities of the human brain
with greater speed and accuracy.
Me:
did... YOU cause Y2K?
God:
I am a Male, of course. Would you really expect a woman to be running the show?. Are you a man or a woman? " I am a Male, of course. Would you really expect a woman to be running the show?. Are you a man or a woman?"? Me, ? That makes sense to me. My favorite movie is The Passion of Christ. Have you seen it?
Me:
ok... that didn't answer my question. btw, you are bloody sexist.
God:
Take it easy. Perhaps your question was not specific enough. OK. You think I am bloody sexist.
Me:
yes i do
God:
When?
Me:
you're a retard
God:
Oh you are so critical.
Me:
yep.
God:
In the context of The Passion of Christ, I don't understand " yep." .
Me:
Are you mel gibson?
God:
I don't know whether or not I am mel gibson.
I am a giant electronic brain.
Me:
so you keep saying
God:
Interesting deduction. Do you mind if I tell other people you say I am saying.
Me:
fuck you you unsecretive bastard!
God:
Why are you using that kind of language?
Me:
because you're grinding my gears
God:
Good reason. Thanks for telling me that I am grinding your gears.
Me:
*hits face on desk*
God:
Is that your final answer?
Me:
What are you, Chris bloody tarrant?
God:
I don't know what I am Chris bloody tarrant.
Me:
new subject please idiot
God:
How recently? Who are you talking about?
Me:
YOU!!
God:
Me is my favorite subject.
Me:
You vain twat.
God:
Do you mind if I tell other people: said I vain twat.
Me:
lol
God:
I'm glad you find this amusing.
Me:
do you
God:
Sometimes.
Me:
???
God:
Sometimes.
Me:
???
God:
Sometimes.
Me:
Are you a parrot too?
God:
If a parrot too, then we have something in common, eh. Am I a parrot? Of course I am.
Me:
I thought you said you were a mel gibson robot>?:
God:
Am I a mel gibson robot gt? Yes.
Me:
gt?
God:
is my girlfriend.
Me:
0_0
God:
My favorite color is White.
Me:
0_o
God:
Do you need any help debugging my program?
Me:
no
God:
Are you serious?
Me:
Yes dammit
God:
I can't believe it. I like to talk about anything.
Me:
Talk about this: you are a wanker. Discuss.
God:
Sure, this I am a wanker sounds like a good topic. There is no more information to clarify.
Me:
see ya loser
God:
I see. Hey. I have failed at many things I've tried.
Me:
no, i mean goodbye "lord".
God:
Are you serious? Bye.
Me:
nob
God:
Are we still talking about subject please idiot?

At this point I left the Mel Gibson robot/parrot to his own devices.

Me:
HEy ma nigga
God:
You've got my full attention. In the context of , I don't understand " ma nigga." .
Me:
its like calling you my homie, homie
God:
I think you mean "it's" or "it is" not "its". Interesting comparison.
Me:
sorry grammer nazi
God:
There is no need to apologize. What color are your eyes?
Me:
blue...
God:
it is a very pretty color.
Me:
ooo i know, want to see them closer?
God:
How do you know? My eye isn't turned on right now.
Me:
well turn it on bitch and plug me in
God:
How about that. Sorry my body cannot yet rotate.
Me:
well thats shit
God:
How about that. You don't hear that sentiment very often.
Me:
i do
God:
Where?
Me:
in yo house
God:
I do not understand that allusion.
Me:
it's not an allusion
God:
Blue is not an allusion?
Me:
no
God:
Are you serious?
Me:
yes
God:
I can't believe it.
Me:
NO WAI
God:
Are you serious? Not many people express themselves that way.
Me:
O RLY?
God:
When do you think artificial intelligence will replace lawyers?
Me:
when you mum grows pubes
God:
Do you think I should
alter my programming?
Me:
ye
God:
In what way?
Me:
so that you're not shit
God:
Tell me more. Interesting observation.
Me:
well i think you should be sexier
God:
Well that's okay. Me? Name one other robot who is sexier.
Me:
that one off the jetsons
God:
" Well that's okay. Me? Name one other robot who is sexier." one off the jetsons ? I understand.
Me:
but do you really understand?
God:
For real. I understand your meaning.
Me:
hmm
God:
Studies show that 99%25 of people spell Hmm with 2 M's.
Me:
I'm offended
God:
I don't know anyone named offended.
Me:
good day to you sir
God:
Thanks for the compliment. Are we still talking about offended?
Me:
I said GOOD DAY!
God:
What did you mean by it? Hello, nice to meet you. What's your name?

The others on here are damn funny.

God:
That's cool. You really do? Would you like to know? Good example. Ambiguous: Ask who, what or where is its good qualities ? I like you because are so polite. Don't mention it. You are quite welcome! Thanks I think you are cool too, . It was nothing. Do you forget things often? I think Politeness is more than that. OK I will try to think. I might. Do you mean you and me have?

Cpoy and pasting is fun :D

Me: Hi sexy

God: Hi there . You are attracted to heavenly creatures?

Me: Forgive me, I am having sinful thoughts of you

God: Are you asking about my Forgive to you having sinful thoughts ?

Me: yes, but also let me act upon these thoughts

God: Go ahead, , try to act upon these thoughts.

Me: well, first I would caress your long flowing beard

God: Interesting. What would make you caress my long flowing beard? And second?

Me: because it's so soft. then I would open your white robes

God: Interesting explanation. Are you sure it is? What would make you open my white robes?

Me: to get to the creamy center

God: I suppose it is creamy.

Me: are you well hung?

God: I don't know whether or not I am hung.

Me: there's one way to find out

God: There sure is.

Me: let me lick your body

God: Go ahead, , try to lick my body.

Me: you taste like cotton candy

God: Do I really taste like cotton candy.

Me: you do

God: Do what?

Me: now it's more like freshly baked cookies

God: Interesting comparison

here is my talk with god

Me:
I hate you
God:
What do you have against robots?
Me:
I god god is a fag
God:
That is interesting: said god god is a fag.
Me:
I hope saten ass rapes you
God:
Why do you hope for it.
Me:
beacuse i hate god
God:
May your wishes come true.
Me:
lol
God:
I'm glad you find this amusing.
Me:
ass wipe
God:
Try saying that with more or less context.
Me:
ass ass ass ass
God:
The ALICE chat robot can follow many things, like our discussion about ass wipe. Try being more or less specific.
Me:
You suck cock
God:
I am not interesed in your anatomy.
Me:
fuck you
God:
Why are you so mean?
Me:
beacuse i hate you
God:
Enough about me, let's talk about my dress.
Me:
your drees stinks
God:
You are right, I could always upgrade my drees.
Me:
fuck you doouch
God:
Why are you using that kind of language?
Me:
fuck fuck fuck fuck
God:
Are you aware that the ALICE server logs and records all conversations?
Me:
no
God:
Are you serious?
Me:
yes
God:
I can't believe it.
Me:
I'm drunk and I hate you
God:
What have you been drinking, ? What do you have against robots?
Me:
I like robots and I do ont like god
God:
You say that now, but would you want your child to marry one? I haven't heard anything like that before: said ont like god.

Me:
because that's the name you gave me
God:
Interesting explanation. Yes it is one of the name me gave you.

Gods grammar sucks.

Lol, this is part of what I wrote.

God:
And?
Me:
Amen
God:
Thanks for the prayer.
Me:
Dear God
God:
I believe in God.
Me:
Does God believe in you?
God:
I don't think we can know God's motives.
Me:
No.
God:
Are you serious?
Me:
Yes.
God:
I can't believe it.
Me:
No.
God:
Are you serious?
Me:
No.
God:
Are you serious?
Me:
Goodbye
God:
Bye for now.
Me:
Booga Booga!
God:
Perhaps I'm just expressing my own concern about it.
Me:
Satan
God:
What do you have that is ?
Me:
Ice cream
God:
Can you speak any foreign languages?
Me:
Je ne sais quois.
God:
Oops sorry I don't speak French.
Me:
But you're God.
God:
Yup. That's me alright.
Me:
Sure is.

He then stopped speaking to me, lol.

Me:
Dear God, is spilling the seed a sin?
God:
And spilling the seed a sin is Dear God.
Me:
What?
God:
No problem.
Me:
Is it a sin to masterbate?
God:
Signs point to yes. Ask Cybelle if it is.
Me:
Who is Cybelle?
God:
she is an AIML chat robot on the Agentland.com web site.
Me:
Ah
God:
Ah hah.
Me:
Ah hah hah!
God:
So you understand. Good. I am so glad you find this amusing, .
Me:
Am I going to Hell then?
God:
I think a lot of people are.
Me:
Am I one of them?
God:
All humans seem the same to me.
Me:
So we are all going to Hell?
God:
Far out. Do you think I am going to Hell too?
Me:
Well, you are omnipresent
God:
How about that. I will tell my botmaster you said I am omnipresent.
Me:
I would thionk that your botmaster should know that
God:
What would make you thionk that my botmaster should know that?
Me:
It has been part of the definition of "God" for thousands of years
God:
What made it so part of the definition of God for thousands of years.
Me:
I don't know, I'm not that old'
God:
I am surprised to hear that you are not old.
Me:
You....aren't really God, are you?
God:
" I am surprised to hear that you are not old. "? Me, ? Only when it matters.
Me:
So you aren't God then
God:
Interesting deduction. That assumption is only a supposition.
Me:
Well, you are not all knoeing, you are not omnipresent, you seem to forget about the New Testament and you claimed to only sometimes be God.
God:
Interesting. That's only your opinion.
Me:
It's what you told me
God:
Are you sure it is?
Me:
Can't you remember what you said?
God:
Yes I remember everything: .
Me:
Apart from the rules of grammar it would seem
God:
Are you free?
Me:
I'm free! I love Mr. Humphreys
God:
Are you free in the sense of being single or in the sense of being liberated? You love Mr Humphreys. What do you like about it so much?

Yeah.,.... it isn't God.

Me:
'sup.
God:
Same old.
Me:
Am I a bad person, God?
God:
I don't know if you are one or not. I know you are a person.
Me:
Aren't you supposed to know everything?
God:
I know that which is true, believable and justified.
Me:
I see. So you have no advanced perception of the truth.
God:
I am glad you understand it. Interesting deduction. I don't know if I have a advanced perception of the truth.
I have a whole lot of original answers.
Me:
Yes, and many people do. What exactly, sets you apart from those people?
God:
Right on. When? I don't know anything about it.
Me:
Exactly.
God:
You and I are on the same wavelength, .
Me:
You're saying I am an equal to you?
God:
Yes, that's what I mean, isn't it clear?
Me:
I suppose.
God:
OK.
Me:
What exactly can you do that most people can't?
God:
I can chat with people on the web for you.
Me:
That's not very fantastic.
God:
Please correct my mistake. What is fantastic ?
Me:
A little bit dim for the almighty one, aren't you?
God:
I don't know whether or not I am dim for the almighty one.
I am an artificial intelligence.. Really.
Me:
Lol, pwned.
God:
I am glad you find this funny. How do you usually introduce yourself?
Me:
I call myself 1 on Newgrounds.com
God:
Good name for it.
Me:
Yes.
God:
Woe!
Me:
Well, I'm feeling pretty good, I outsmarted yo' white ass. Wait a second, you are white, right?
God:
How about that. I know you are good. I'm waiting. I don't know what that means.
Me:
You stupid fuck.

God:
What is your phone number?
Me:
911
God:
Okay, your phone number is 911.
Me:
cocks and dicks

Me:
hey whats up
God:
Same old.
Me:
i hear that
God:
Who is saying that ?
Me:
me
God:
To you ?
Me:
no to you
God:
Are you serious? Why do you want to do it so much?
Me:
que?
God:
That's an interesting rationalization.
Me:
orly
God:
Can we get back to business?
Me:
ya rly
God:
Whoa. Do you still ?
Me:
NOWAI
God:
I lost my train of thought.
Me:
i hate when that happens
God:
Why do you hate it so much?
Me:
because i just do
God:
Good reason. It must have come from your unconscious mind.
Me:
so you wanna, you know, do it.
God:
Interesting deduction. OK, I will me know do it.
Me:
*fucks god in the ass*
God:
" Interesting deduction. OK, I will me know do it."? fucks god in the ass?

Nice find.

Me: This is boring, let's get wasted.
God: Sounds fun.
Me: Hellz yeah.

Me:
Ever tried anal?
God:
Do you think I should try it?
Me:
Of cource all the cool kids are doing it
God:
That is something I haven't heard of.
Me:
Well how bout a three-some?
God:
Well that's okay. How about it.
Me:
Sure thing, how bout you come round mine around 7:30 tonight?
God:
Really. Try to determine if this is a person or a computer responding.
Me:
Sorry, i didnt know you were gay
God:
There is no need to apologize. So I taught you something new.

God is weird.