…if you’re a mutant midget who likes having sex with children.
On April 4th 2005, Commport member Thirdlife (webmaster of Puppy-Kicker) was searching the Ohio Electronic Sex Offenders Registry for sex offenders in his area, just for fun. He found one…man…who was quite noteworthy. Brian Peppers. His frightening and revolting appearance was the stuff great threads are made of, so one was made in the Commport and another in Puppy Kicker Forums so that others could stare in horror at his hideous visage. A while later, he was entered into hotornot.com, and many Commport and Puppy-Kicker members gave him a 10, just for fun. Nowadays his picture and sex offender profile can be found on many websites. There is currently a $250 prize at Puppy-Kicker for finding an uglier sex offender.
But let’s learn about the man behind the ugly. Brian Peppers was born 1st November, 1968 in a shed in the backhills of Ohio. His mother was a quiet country woman and his father was her brother. Many generations of inbreeding had taken their toll on poor Brian, born badly deformed and abandoned by his parents. He was left at a young woman’s doorstep. The young woman had poor vision and took Brian in as her own. He was shunned by his classmates as a child, hated and feared by the other children. His genetic and physical deformities left him unintelligent and physically weak. He repeated many grades. People were naturally afraid of Brian, and he became isolated from his peers and the community.
High school was an especially tough time for Brian who was frustrated at his inability to get a date. He was often caught molesting barnyard animals and masturbating in public areas. When Brian turned 17 his mother became a crackwhore and deserted him, and Brian moved between foster families until he dropped out of high school at age 18. Brian then got a job at a day care center. When he worked there he found that he could betrust the children so that they wouldn’t run away from him. He then realized that he could use the children for sex. They were so naieve and innocent they wouldn’t think much of it. And then…
So don’t molest children and don’t marry your sister.
*Everything from here on may or may not be completely fictitious