No Coffee Before A Long Drive.

[Gooch]

Trust me, if there's one thing that I learned today, it wasn't in school. It was actually before school that I learned a valuable lesson.

I was in a rush today, almost to the point that if I drove from my house to my school, I'd be about a couple minutes late for my only class of the day.

I only woke up about twenty minutes beforehand, so I wasn't feeling totally awake yet. So, I decided to make myself a pot of coffee, hopefully to help me get a little rush going in me. I had rushed to finish my coffee, and left from my house at about noon, with my class to officially start in twenty-five minutes.

Well, as I'm getting to the bridge to the town, I'm just cruising along the highway, listening to the new Bloodhound Gang CD, when suddenly, a pressure started to hit my lower intestine.

I felt like I was going to shit myself. I slowly started to feel this pressure heading towards my bottom, ready to burst. Luckily, I managed to hold it in long enough. I made it to school, and quickly rushed to the bathroom to let go of everything that was building up inside of me.

Well, instead of being only a couple of minutes late to class, I was about fifteen minutes late instead. If I would've decided against that coffee, I might've been able to make it on time, or miss getting there on time by a couple minutes.

So, the big moral of the story is that you don't want to drink coffee, or anything for that matter of fact, that will make your stomach churn when you're on a long drive with no bathrooms around you. You just might be paying the price for doing so. On top of that, you won't be late to things when you decide against it, too.

Boy, I'm just glad what could've happen, didn't happen.

[Jose]

Usually drinking something in the morning will do that to you if you have a lot of food in your system. All liquids do is start the digestive system up in the morning.

[Evark]

At 10/19/05 03:33 AM, -Gooch- wrote: Boy, I'm just glad what could've happen, didn't happen.

Well, despite the grotesque details, I finished reading and will now comment. I never drink coffee on an empty stomach in the morning, because it is a stomach ache like no other.

Then again, I don't have coffee as often as most people. My usual dosage is a cup every couple of days.

Good thing you made it to a bathroom though. That could've been a real problem.

[Slimyguy]

At 10/19/05 03:35 AM, -Jose- wrote: Usually drinking something in the morning will do that to you if you have a lot of food in your system. All liquids do is start the digestive system up in the morning.

That's why I eat my cofee in the morning in solid form.

[Morextremist]

I start my mornings with a frozen container of Hi-C. I cut off the top and eat it like an italian ice.

[NEMESlS]

At 10/19/05 03:38 AM, Slimyguy wrote:

At 10/19/05 03:35 AM, -Jose- wrote: Usually drinking something in the morning will do that to you if you have a lot of food in your system. All liquids do is start the digestive system up in the morning.

That's why I eat my cofee in the morning in solid form.

and by that do you just mean you eat plain crystals? yum...

[SomeKindOfMonster]

that is why you drink those energy drinks. they are tasty and they make you zippy.

sont drink too much though, and god forbid if you drink 2 rockstars, a red bull, and 2 shots of expresso in one shot....you will be more electrified then a hair drier, you will have to use the john many times, and you wll feel very sick... <--first hand experiance.

[ViceFullbuster]

Why didn't you just get an energy drink or a starbucks double shot at the gas station?

[Taylor-1]

my aunt once had some coffee on an empty stomache, she was hungry and decided she could wait until lunch with just coffee,so she had a cup,then she went to target and I had gone with her,just because I had some game money,as we were walking to the electronics section my aunt said she felt sick,I got freaked out. and she started to walk allthe way back to the bathrooms,thankfully she mad it, and I was scared it was the flu,because I really hate that and would rather die than catch it,but a few days later she tryed the same thing again, and to the same result.

so....yeah....

coffee+no food=bad results

[ArtistJ]

real men dont poop

[ArtistJ]

i drink coffee on an empty stomach on a regular basis, and i dont even poop everyday. Coffee is fine, its the rest of your diet thats probabaly bad.

[ArtistJ]

At 10/19/05 03:38 AM, Slimyguy wrote:

At 10/19/05 03:35 AM, -Jose- wrote: Usually drinking something in the morning will do that to you if you have a lot of food in your system. All liquids do is start the digestive system up in the morning.

That's why I eat my cofee in the morning in solid form.

Its really fuckin' good on toast with a dash of cinnamon.

[El-Sammo]

...dude you used the school toilets? Those things are fucking disgusting

[Jemry]

At 10/19/05 03:41 AM, NEMESlS wrote: and by that do you just mean you eat plain crystals? yum...

I should slap you, coffee is made from freakin' beans, not crystals. You must've been thinking of jelly but how you could've associated coffee with jelly is beyond me.

Well, I've used too many big words in one post.

[El-Sammo]

...eat plain crystals

God damn nun coffee.

[XwaynecoltX]

Ha

I had situations like that, but ya not the best feeling when your about to go within seconds haha, lucky it never exploded in a bad way,....

~X~

[StickmanBob]

i dont even eat food in the morning

[Der-Ubermensch]

Coffee is a diuretic.. Durr..

:P

[Zerok]

At 10/19/05 05:16 AM, El_Sammo wrote: ...dude you used the school toilets? Those things are fucking disgusting

Well, the alternative was the car seat.
Or his pants.

[XwaynecoltX]

At 10/19/05 07:05 AM, Zerok wrote: Well, the alternative was the car seat.
Or his pants.

Roffl

Neither would be a choice for me, if anything happend i would turn back home and forget school that day, ha i could just say i cant make it in today because i just pooed my pants haha....

~X~

[merijn]

wahahahahahhahaha u havent got a strong stomach have u^^ maybe u shuold drink ur cofee while ur driving

[merijn]

That's why I eat my cofee in the morning in solid form.

^^ that's smart im gonna try that but i think it makes it worse

[Maus]

Ah coffee, the natural laxative. Also a decongestant.

It's always the very first cup of the day, I dunno why. As a coffee drinker, I plan my morning around that first cup, and the proverbial trip to the swimming pool.

I thought this was going to be a rant about NOT having coffee before a long trip, but I've told that story before. haha.

[JoS]

You should have pooped in class then pushed it under somoen elses desk. Class would have been canceled due to people vomitting.

[ArtistJ]

At 10/19/05 11:55 AM, JusticeofSarcasm wrote: You should have pooped in class then pushed it under somoen elses desk. Class would have been canceled due to people vomitting.

god i am fuckin' glad i dont go to school with you.

[JoS]

At 10/19/05 01:26 PM, ArtistJ wrote:

At 10/19/05 11:55 AM, JusticeofSarcasm wrote: You should have pooped in class then pushed it under somoen elses desk. Class would have been canceled due to people vomitting.

god i am fuckin' glad i dont go to school with you.

I live at school so I dont have to worry about having to poop in the car or on the bus to school.

[Gooch]

At 10/19/05 11:48 AM, Maus wrote: Ah coffee, the natural laxative. Also a decongestant.

It's always the very first cup of the day, I dunno why. As a coffee drinker, I plan my morning around that first cup, and the proverbial trip to the swimming pool.

Same thing with me. That was my only cup of coffee for the morning, and of course, the only thing that I put into my system before even leaving. I think the fact that I drank coffee on an empty stomach definitely contributed to the fact about me almost going all over the place.

At 10/19/05 03:43 AM, X-Naut wrote: Why didn't you just get an energy drink or a starbucks double shot at the gas station?

Well, the only energy drinks we sell at the gas station are Red Bulls, and I can't stand those things at all. We don't even sell anything to do with Starbucks, except these little bottles of coffee liquor. I wonder what those taste like. I'll have to find out once my next drinking experience comes along, which just might be this weekend for all I know.