Things that make me happy.

[Earfetish]

1. Polo mints. They're the pinnacle of minty-goodness. Regular flavour please. The amount of pleasure you get from one Polo is far greater than the penny it costs. The mint with a hole in the middle, for some reason. It gives you more surface area to suck on and makes it feel a bit interesting in your mouth, I guess. And after a doob, a nice Polo mint is sublime.

2. Smoking cannabis. Isn't it great? You think, eh, I've got loads of work to do, and I'm not motivated at all to do it. What I'll do, is, I'll have a joint, and then watch some TV and mong out, until I forget about all the work I have to do. It's the way to be. Fuck being motivated. And on the flip-side, you can think, fucking Hell I've loads of work to do... I'll get doing it, and I'll look forwards to having a joint when I finish. So it can motivate you, too, I guess. In theory.

3. Listening to The Berzerker on a bus and fantasising about smashing someone's head off the bars. It's an amusing way to spend any bus-ride. Just think of it, the next time you're on a bus - exploding, and fucking killing everyone brutally. Grabbing that businessman by the hair and smacking his face, nose-first, against that vertical iron bar he's holding on to. Wouldn't everyone go completely mad? Wouldn't it cause immensely entertaining chaos? You could make a big deal of it - snarl and growl whilst you're doing it, before flinging his writhing body to the floor and tearing off his nose with your teeth. Hah, it'd be hilarious. Everyone would be terrified.

4. Shouting at the homeless. Next time some desolate cunt comes over to you begging for money, or you have to step over one on the pavement, just turn around and scream at them, "GET A JOB YOU FUCKING WASTE." Regular motivation is always worthwhile, so try to follow them around screaming obscenities at them, all the time informing them you won't piss off until they go to a Job-Centre. It's fine for sleeping hobos, too. Wake them up with a golden shower and hurl abuse at 'em.

5. Masturbating in public. It's like regular wanking, but with the adrenaline buzz of imminent discovery and prosecution. If you can manage to sneak in a little anal fingerplay, then all the better. Try and keep a straight face and stare straight ahead, with your pants around your ankles, your slimy cock in one hand and your other hand deep in your rectal cavity. Perfect for boring situations, like queues, or exams, although some upright standing may be necessary for any arseplay. Apologise to the person behind you for the view they'll inevitably recieve.

6. Being a bastard. On Saturday, someone from High School signed on MSN at about 12PM - y'know, one of those people you loathe but act polite to. The following conversation occured:

Her: How r u kevin
Me: Get to fuck
Me: I always fucking hated you
Me: Even in High School
Me: Fuck off

I decided this was a good time to end the conversation. Being a bastard makes you feel great. People have the right to know exactly how you feel about them, and it also makes you feel like a big man so everyone wins.

[A04]

At 10/4/05 11:04 AM, Earfetish wrote: Her: How r u kevin
Me: Get to fuck

Get to fuck?

[WilliWowza]

I dont like you this much < >

>:(

[DanAbnormal]

At 10/4/05 11:06 AM, Grandfather-Clock wrote: dont forget about corrie kev,

corries reet up your street!

How Craig Charles could lower himself to coronation street is beyond me.
Robot wars was bad enough.

[Jinzoa]

i agree with the mints, and being a bastard to people who are bitches, things that also make me happy is a friday and saturday night as me and bro do extreme excercise every friday and saturday plus the whole week and live off very little then on those nights we eat to out hearts content

[Lucozadedude]

stuff that makes me feel good

1. ranting on for no apperent reason about just about anything, big or small in my head and then making a flash about it.

2. slapping cheeky sods (long story...)

3. being better than people just because i AM!

4. making flash

5. listening to music and....

6. KILLING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Earfetish]

At 10/4/05 11:06 AM, A04 wrote: Get to fuck?

Just a basic aggressive conversation-opener. Like, Oi, except for with intonations of 'fuck off I don't want to talk to you.'

[Earfetish]

At 10/4/05 11:06 AM, Grandfather-Clock wrote: dont forget about corrie kev,

corries reet up your street!

I don't like Corrie at all. And Craig Charles, ffs, he was good in Red Dwarf as a comedy actor and on Robot Wars as a presenter, but on a soap being all dramatic? Never.

[HeartbreakHoldout]

At 10/4/05 11:04 AM, Earfetish wrote: 3. Listening to The Berzerker on a bus and fantasising about smashing someone's head off the bars. It's an amusing way to spend any bus-ride. Just think of it, the next time you're on a bus - exploding, and fucking killing everyone brutally. Grabbing that businessman by the hair and smacking his face, nose-first, against that vertical iron bar he's holding on to. Wouldn't everyone go completely mad? Wouldn't it cause immensely entertaining chaos? You could make a big deal of it - snarl and growl whilst you're doing it, before flinging his writhing body to the floor and tearing off his nose with your teeth. Hah, it'd be hilarious. Everyone would be terrified.

So i'm not the only one that fantasises about brutally murdering everyone? Tis a great way to relieve tension without actually doing anything illegal.

[cool-penguin-0]

At 10/4/05 11:04 AM, Earfetish wrote: 2. Smoking cannabis. t
3. fantasising about smashing someone's head
4. Shouting at the homeless.

Someone's read American Psycho recently. Like me. S'good book.

MSN

You on MSN? Is this another made up story?

[Earfetish]

At 10/4/05 11:19 AM, cool_penguin_0 wrote: Someone's read American Psycho recently. Like me. S'good book.

I have not actually ever read it. But I should. I saw the movie, but it's not the same thing.

MSN

You on MSN?

No

Is this another made up story?

well it's a made up piece of writing

[cool-penguin-0]

Nobs and yoghurt.

[chili-kitten]

At 10/4/05 11:06 AM, A04 wrote:

Get to fuck?

yars

[Bou]

At 10/4/05 11:42 AM, chili_kitten wrote:

At 10/4/05 11:06 AM, A04 wrote:

Get to fuck?

yars

Sometimes pictures say more than words, children.

[Shadow-XII]

Herbicide on roses and mallets on kittens, bright copper missiles and warm woollen nooses...

[chili-kitten]

At 10/4/05 11:46 AM, -Shadow_XII- wrote: mallets on kittens

:'( *weep*

[Link50000]

Video games
internet
Music like metal and rock
taking a dump
Eating
sleeping

and thats about it :)

[Shadow-XII]

At 10/4/05 11:49 AM, chili_kitten wrote:

'( *weep*

Not chili kittens. Normal kittens.

Oh, come on, you know I love you <3

[Earfetish]

At 10/4/05 11:25 AM, Earfetish wrote:

MSN

You on MSN?

No

Is this another made up story?

well it's a made up piece of writing

Oh wait I get it. I actually was on MSN and that actually happened.

[LookingTwiceKills]

I love being subscribed to your MySpace!
I get all this stuff early!

[UntamedFlames343]

weed
blowjobs
and alcohol

[Earfetish]

At 10/4/05 12:48 PM, LookingTwiceKills wrote: I love being subscribed to your MySpace!
I get all this stuff early!

I have to ask you, did you really get hit by a car? Was it severe? And did you laugh at the pun in your username in the light of the accident?

[LookingTwiceKills]

At 10/4/05 12:50 PM, Earfetish wrote: did you really get hit by a car?

Yes i did, thank you for remembering...

Was it severe?

Two broken legs and a colar bone....nuffin' :)

And did you laugh at the pun in your username in the light of the accident?

Yeah!
I saw the topic -Dawkins- made, and laughed all the way through it! The pun is just comepletely dumb, seen as i was hit by a drunk driver who swerved over a two way street....I had no chance of not being hit :(

[Earfetish]

At 10/4/05 12:54 PM, LookingTwiceKills wrote: I saw the topic -Dawkins- made, and laughed all the way through it! The pun is just comepletely dumb, seen as i was hit by a drunk driver who swerved over a two way street....I had no chance of not being hit :(

Aaaah, that's not really the same as stepping in front of a car without looking twice. Perhaps all the drunk drivers will get killed off and their genes will stop happening, or something.

[miss-ally]

things that make me happy ...

1. my significant other <(^_^)>.

2. art.

3. computers.

4. chasing geese.

5. dancing around with my friends.

6. killing benjamin franklin...

[Earfetish]

At 10/4/05 12:59 PM, allyfaerie4 wrote: 4. chasing geese.

I like chasing geese.

[Mr-Pope]

At 10/4/05 11:08 AM, DanAbnormal wrote:

At 10/4/05 11:06 AM, Grandfather-Clock wrote: dont forget about corrie kev,

corries reet up your street!

How Craig Charles could lower himself to coronation street is beyond me.
Robot wars was bad enough.

But he made Takeshis castle watchable.

[Fim]

CHOCOLATE = HAPPINESS XD

[Powerlungs]

I was coming from from lunch and was stoned of my tits. I was suppose to have double business studies and I was dreading it, but then we were told we had a free class which we spent listening to The Doors.

That make me pretty fucking happy.

[Earfetish]

At 10/4/05 01:04 PM, Mr_Pope wrote:

How Craig Charles could lower himself to coronation street is beyond me.
Robot wars was bad enough.

But he made Takeshis castle watchable.

It's funny how they occasionally go from actor to presenter and just stay there, like Stephen Fry.

Anyway, he's a comedy actor, he doesn't suit a soap like Corrie because the whole country knows him, and his accent isn't much Manchester.