best joke contest

[BUTANE]

you right a joke and i will read it and give a score from 1-10 ten being the best.

I i give your joke less than 4 i will harrass the shit out of you for thinking that the joke was funny when it really was not.

Good luck.

after 5 jokes have been told and reviewed i will submit my joke and everyone can analyze it.

[Spektrumanarchist]

whats so funny about slinging about a dog around by its tail at 300 miles per hour?

stopping it with a shovel.

[ISpitOnYourGrave]

tell your mother to use some vaseline cause she chaffed my nuts last time.... was that funny?

[ILoveWadeFulp]

Two tampons were walking down the street

Which one do you talk to ?

None cos there both stuck up cunts !

(umm dont ask)

What do you call an african floating down a river?
Blackcurrent.

[Spektrumanarchist]

At 1/6/05 07:11 PM, ILoveWadeFulp wrote: Two tampons were walking down the street

Which one do you talk to ?

None cos there both stuck up cunts !

(umm dont ask)

retarded...heres another joke from me

two muffins where in a oven, one said " holy crap its hot as hell in here"
and the other said" HOLY SHIT! A TALKING MUFFIN!!1"

At 1/6/05 07:11 PM, ILoveWadeFulp wrote: Two tampons were walking down the street

Which one do you talk to ?

None cos there both stuck up cunts !

(umm dont ask)

What did ILoveWadeFulp say to one of his tampons?
Nothing,theyr both stuck up assholes.

[HilariousGenocide]

why cant stevie wonder read?

because hes black
rofl i read that joke somewhere & it was so stupid that i laughed

[BUTANE]

At 1/6/05 07:10 PM, gritty wrote: whats so funny about slinging about a dog around by its tail at 300 miles per hour?

stopping it with a shovel.

shut up noob that gets a zero becuase you wrote the joke badly and its not funny.

the actual answer is making u have sex with it u fag.

[ILoveWadeFulp]

At 1/6/05 07:13 PM, gritty wrote:

At 1/6/05 07:11 PM, ILoveWadeFulp wrote: Two tampons were walking down the street

Which one do you talk to ?

None cos there both stuck up cunts !

(umm dont ask)

retarded...heres another joke from me

two muffins where in a oven, one said " holy crap its hot as hell in here"
and the other said" HOLY SHIT! A TALKING MUFFIN!!1"

Wow like yours so aint retarded , yours is just amazing

[ShaJ0]

I raped your moms......o wait this is for jokes...sorry

[BUTANE]

At 1/6/05 07:11 PM, knightman1 wrote: tell your mother to use some vaseline cause she chaffed my nuts last time.... was that funny?

no not really that only gets a 1

What did Gritty's dick say to his nuts?
Nothing,they're both stuck-up assholes

[BonusStage]

1) ILWF is getting mad at people that she shouldn't, considering they're level
2) Goldencat is a good rapper and user
3) Tada joke finished :)

[BUTANE]

At 1/6/05 07:11 PM, ILoveWadeFulp wrote: Two tampons were walking down the street

Which one do you talk to ?

None cos there both stuck up cunts !

(umm dont ask)

HA HA HA that was only a 4 so shut up moron

[Frank]

Q. What's the opposite of Christopher Reeves?

A. Christopher Walken

[lapis]

Well if we're going for the politically incorrect jokes, here's mine:
What's the difference between a jew and a bucket filled with crap?

The bucket

Damn, I just lowered my standards :(

[Tancrisism]

What does a rubics cube and a dick have in common?

The more you play with it the harder it gets.

[Zerok]

I was standing a park, watching a frisbee... wondering, "why does it appear larger as it gets closer?"

Then it hit me.

[Spektrumanarchist]

Wow like yours so aint retarded , yours is just amazing

i hope you know i was being sarcastic...and then you came back with sarcasim.

[Makaio]

what did one cow say to the other cow

/moo

a guy walks into a bar in arkansaw wearing an armani suit and takes a seat at the bar.
he looks around and the whole room is staring at him,he turns around and says to the bartender "can i get a mississippi mudslide"
the bartender says "yall aint from around here are ya" he says "no im from new york"
the bartender says "oh really now and what do ya do der in new yerk?"
he says "im a taxidermist" "whats a tax e der meest"
he says "its some1 who mounts dead animals"
then the bartender looks around the bar and says "its ok guys hes one of us".

what do you call the moisture between to plp having sex in arkansaw?

/ realitive humidity

if i dont get flamed ill psot more og and btw that other guy stole my tampon joke.

[Spektrumanarchist]

At 1/6/05 07:17 PM, FrameByFrameLock wrote: What did Gritty's dick say to his nuts?
Nothing,they're both stuck-up assholes

roflikines

whats the difference between a jew and a pizza?

pizzas dont scream when you put them in the oven

[Ryo-1]

Why did Hitler kill himself

He saw the gas bill!!!

One day a blondes husband walks into the kitchen and see his wife having a problem with somthing the husband said "What is the matter honey" to which the blonde wife replied "Im putting this puzzle together and its supposed to be a Tiger!" then the husband said "Honey,put the Frosted Flakes back in the box"

You like

[Makaio]

3 guys go to a hunting lodge one american one cape bretoner and a newfoundlander and took turns hunting.

the american left and 4 hours later he comes back with a deer they asked him how he caught tghe deer and he said
"me see tracks, me follow tracks, me see deer, me shoot dear

next the cape bretoner leaves and comes back 3 hours later with a deer and the two guys asked how did ya catch um
he said "me see tracks me follow tracks me see deer me shoot dear

lastly the newfie leaves and 9 hours he comes back bloody and beaten so the guys ask him what happened and he said
"me see tracks me follow tracks me see choo choo me get hit by choo choo."

/

5 newfies were trying to measure a telephone p9ole before they put it in the ground.
so they stand it on its end and then stand on each others shoulders with a metre stick but before they could finish it would fall over.
a cape bretoner walks by watches this a few times and says why dont you just measure it while its on its side?
they say poor dumb cape bretoner we want t know how tall it is not how long it is.

[EtchASketchClock]

Do u know Jack Schitt?
Well, first there was Jack Schitt who married Noe Schitt.
They had 6 children...
Bull Schitt, Giva Schitt, Holie Schitt, Fulla Schitt, Deep Schitt,and Dip Schitt. Jack Schitt's Parents were Awe Schitt and Oh Schitt.
Deep Schitt married Dumb Schitt.
Noe Schitt then divorced Sack Schitt and married all this Schitt.

funny no?

A group of blondes is going on vacation to Wonderland for the summer. The ride into the city and see a sign saying, "Wonderland Left". They get pissed and go home.

[ILoveWadeFulp]

At 1/6/05 07:15 PM, FrameByFrameLock wrote:

At 1/6/05 07:11 PM, ILoveWadeFulp wrote: Two tampons were walking down the street

Which one do you talk to ?

None cos there both stuck up cunts !

(umm dont ask)

What did ILoveWadeFulp say to one of his tampons?
Nothing,theyr both stuck up assholes.

HIS TAMPONS ... Im a fucking girl ...

[Squatting-Dog]

What did I say to BUTANE'S mother?

Bitch make me a sandwich!

[Flameo-Ninja]

What's the difference between a corvette and a bunch of dead babies?

I don't have a corvette in my garage.

[AlredyTryed]

Three boys(Tom, Jake, and Perry) are walking on a wet bridge. Tom says "I heard that this bridge is magic. If you make a wish, then jump off the side, you will land in your wish." Jake says "OK, I'll try it. I wish for...MONEY!" and jumps off the side. After a brief falling period, he lands in a huge pile of $1,000 bills. He calls up to the other 2 boys ans says "Guys, it works! Hurry up and wish!" When he hears this, Tom climbs onto the railing. "My turn. I wish for...WOMEN!!" He lands in a group of women. Now it's Perry's turn. He climbs up onto the wet railing. "I'll wish for--" All of a sudden, he slips.
"HOLY SHIT!!"