I will now give you a manual how to avoid getting kidnapped by aliens.
1. Make sure you don't have weird or high tech stuff in your home. Aliens like to study earth tech.
2. Wear aluminium hats and clothing, this should interfere with their scanning equipment.
3. Send out a jamming signal at all times.
4. When you have visitors, always pull their faces. Some aliens like to be disguisted.
5. Have a loaded gun standing by incase of alien visitors.
6. Do not act weird.
7. Incase of crop circles, you must fortify your home and try to shoot down the aliens.
8. When there's a bright light coming trough your window(s) at night. RUN!!!! Run away from your home, take you gun with you and don't get hypnotised.
9. When you have been abducted, try grabbing the anal probe and use on the aliens.
10. Use other equipment you can find to kill the other aliens on your way to the control room.
11. Fly back to Earth, set on selfdestruct and make the spaceship fly home to crashland in one of their mayor cities. (Incase you want payback, note however, that this might cause an intergalactic war)
You now know how to escape aliens.
*Bright light shines to window*
What da... no, please.... no, NOOOOOOOOOOO.
*Thud*
Fuck, my toe.
*thud*
My ass hurts like hell.