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DarkSoldier
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Response to Relationship Crew 2013-02-19 21:32:44 Reply

At 1/27/13 03:01 PM, selena wrote: Use a dating site. People underestimate the power of these.. They have sites for all races and relationship types. Have you tried one?

I have always been sceptical about the use of online dating services but they seem to be growing in popularity. I have never tried one but I know plenty of people who have and are very satisfied with the services provided.


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Penrodeo
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Response to Relationship Crew 2013-03-07 01:20:51 Reply

So, advice guys?

I've been talking to a friend of mine, V, for a long time. We've always been very close friends, from the time she moved to my school my junior year to even after she left for colorado. If I wasn't a fucking moron and tried to stay in my long distance relationship I would have asked her out, but that's a different story for a different day.

I've wanted this girl since the day I laid eyes on her, and I've been kicking myself almost every day for not manning up, dumping that dumb bitch of an ex and taking a chance with V. But, whatever.

She ends up marrying some prick and moving to colorado. A lot of our conversations are about how she feels lonely, how she regrets some of the decisions she made with him and her just wondering why she's still with him. I ask her all the time what she sees in him and she can never really give a good answer. They live together but she almost never sees him. He'll come home then just head out to smoke with his friends or go to parties while she just stays at home doing nothing all day.

He's very distrusting, though he's cheated on her and lied to her on several occasions. There's been a few times where me and V were talking and he'd force her to quit talking to me. They constantly fight, they barely talk and he hasn't hit her, but has grabbed her and forced her to just lay there while he yells at her. She thinks that she can change this somehow and always says that this is just a part of him and what not.

About a month ago I told her about my feelings for her, and she told me she's always liked me and how she wondered why I never took the chance to ask her out. Every time he's gone we have a more open conversation, maybe about my feelings for her, her feelings for me, how things used to be when she was over here, how she can't stand how her current relationship is, etc etc. Obviously we're good friends so whenever I tell her about a girl I'm maybe trying to talk to or I'm interested in she always seems to get a little sad and she never really wants to talk about it much.

We've always talked about being able to see each other again, and how we'd love to just be able to hang out one more time at least. Since I filed my taxes and I'm getting a decent return, I told her I was planning on a trip where I could come down and see her. V and I are both really excited about this. She's been trying to find a hotel for me and we've been planning all sorts of things to do for the time we'll have. Going to dinner, seeing a movie at the theater, having a movie night at the hotel with some movies she and I will both bring, etc.

The other day when we were talking I told her I still wanted her. She just seemed sad and just mentioned her marriage but she also said she wished things turned out different. I asked if she still wanted me to come over and visit knowing how I felt, and she said yes. But she also said not to tempt her.

Everything leading up to this point and that sentence makes me feel that she wants out, that she wants something more. She always says how she just has to settle for what she has, that she deserves more but it's too late, etc etc. I've told her a lot that she doesn't have to settle for less, that she can actually be happy with someone else, she could find better, and she said she wanted to, but the guy would just try to make her life hell. They've already talked about a divorce, he said that he'd never sign the papers and he'd never let her leave him.

I told her I was sort of sad that I couldn't have her, and how I didn't know if I'd feel the way I do about her with another girl. She told me not to worry. She promised that no matter what, at the very least she'd be mine 'in spirit. In mind. In a different world.'

I'm visiting her this upcoming Tuesday and staying til Thursday. She picked those days because her husband works those days and he's never home during the week anyways.

So, uh, you know. What should I think of all this? Does she feel the way I think she does? Am I an idiot for thinking this way? Would it be wrong to break up their marriage? Do I even have a chance?

I want to go regardless of if I can get her cause I mean, I'm gonna be in vacation in Colorado so why not right? But I really want to build something with her, so, I guess I'd like any advice I can get.

tl;dr I want a girl that's married to a prick, we both have feelings for each other and I'm going to see her Tuesday. halp

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Response to Relationship Crew 2013-03-07 18:27:05 Reply

At 3/7/13 01:20 AM, Penrodeo wrote: So, uh, you know. What should I think of all this? Does she feel the way I think she does? Am I an idiot for thinking this way? Would it be wrong to break up their marriage? Do I even have a chance?

No, you're not an idiot at all but you missed your real chance with her and now that she is married, I don't see much of an opportunity for you. She may talk about how her life sucks and wishes it turned out differently but she does not appear to be very motivated to change her life. If you get involved, you would be getting in the middle of her marriage and if her husband finds out, it is only rational and logical to assume he won't be happy and he'll come after you. Is it worth it to get yourself into this girl's already complicated marriage without knowing if she really likes you? You mentioned she said she likes you but it seems more like you have been friend zoned. Have you two ever gotten intimate with each other?

I think you would be wasting your time with her and your only real opportunity with her is if she gets divorced but otherwise I would suggest your place your attention elsewhere, perhaps finding girls that aren't married.


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Response to Relationship Crew 2013-03-07 19:21:54 Reply

At 3/7/13 01:20 AM, Penrodeo wrote:

I'm assuming she's the same age as you are first off. Her situation doesn't sound good but I think you have to be really fucking careful here. The guy holds her down and yells at her, he said they can't get a divorce because he won't let her? And this is just what she tells you so who knows how bad it actually is.

You seem to be thinking of yourself and what you want more then her here. You want to go there and do what? Do you plan on trying to sleep with her? Cause I guarantee when her husband finds out he will not be happy to put it lightly. Does he even know you're coming out to visit her? Because even if nothing happens between you, imagine what his reaction will be when he finds out his wife has been hanging out with a guy and keeping it secret. I mean I may be overreacting but this is exactly the shit that seems like it could push it over the edge to a physically abusive relationship.

I mean I guess your going now but I would personally stay out of it for the time being. Support her, encourage her to get marriage counseling and maybe if they do end up getting divorced you can consider the possibility of having something with her. But she is married right now and you have to accept that. Don't make things worse for her and encourage her to try to find some means to make things better, but if you actually care about her you shouldn't try to catalyze them getting broken up.

Plus your 19 man, even if this girl is special you shouldn't be holding out for her when you know she's not available. Have some fun and maybe down the road things will work out between you, but don't spend your life waiting for her.

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Response to Relationship Crew 2013-03-15 11:11:26 Reply

I completely agree with Goat-man. You are taking a very big risk here, potentially triggering her husband to become physically abusive.

I understand that you feel you should act, to try and get her to see how fucked up her situation is and how much better off she would be with you. However, I doubt any of that will have any effect. Positive effect that is for a negative effect will be most likely. It's unfair to her to put her safety in danger for your own needs.

The way I see it you're better off staying in touch with her and to be there for her as a friend, to get her through this difficult time in her life. The marriage she's in is doomed to fail and is already falling apart. They've already discussed a divorce and even though he says he'll never sign, it's a strong signal it won't last very long. Besides, him refusing to sign doesn't mean they can't divorce and I doubt he'll go through the trouble of trying to find her when they do seeing as he doesn't seem to care about her right now.

For you this is a waiting game. You'll need to decide for yourself if you want to wait for her or move on. Just know that when you do move on, you have to completely forget about V as a possibility. You'll never be able to completely love another woman if you don't. Good luck man.


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Response to Relationship Crew 2013-03-23 14:50:06 Reply

We feel less love when our partner does something annoying?
I don't think so. Any time we've fought I've still felt very strongly in love, if not more so.
So either I disagree or I'm confused. Could be either.


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Response to Relationship Crew 2013-03-23 20:08:50 Reply

i will help u run this pm me if i got the job thanks


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Response to Relationship Crew 2013-03-23 20:32:35 Reply

At 3/23/13 08:08 PM, john544 wrote: i will help u run this pm me if i got the job thanks

I regret to inform you that you did not get the job.

This is an automated post. Do not reply.

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Response to Relationship Crew 2013-03-25 23:57:20 Reply

Sooo I just got out of a 1 1/2 year long disnant relationship this saturdayFirst thing I did was to try and distract myself with Newgrounds sadly it isn't working it actually is coming back to haunt me no matter what i do.

Anyway any advice on how to get rid of this terrible depression?


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Response to Relationship Crew 2013-03-26 02:19:27 Reply

At 3/25/13 11:57 PM, Wegra wrote: Sooo I just got out of a 1 1/2 year long disnant relationship this saturdayFirst thing I did was to try and distract myself with Newgrounds sadly it isn't working it actually is coming back to haunt me no matter what i do.

Anyway any advice on how to get rid of this terrible depression?

Newgrounds wouldn't distract me personally.

Shit's gonna suck for a while, take things easy on yourself. Especially for the first few days just try to keep yourself distracted, go outside and have an adventure, hang out with friends, do something you don't normally do. Just try to keep your mind off it. Your gonna have to deal with it emotionally but at the beginning I think norming to just not having that person in your life constantly is enough.

Chill with friends as much as you can, if your of age alcohol can either be great or the worst idea ever, you'd know better then I would. Just make sure if you do get drunk you give your phone to someone else so you can't contact your ex. Find someone who won't mind if you bitch to them.

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Response to Relationship Crew 2013-03-26 18:56:41 Reply

At 3/26/13 02:19 AM, the-goatman wrote:
At 3/25/13 11:57 PM, Wegra wrote: Sooo I just got out of a 1 1/2 year long disnant relationship this saturdayFirst thing I did was to try and distract myself with Newgrounds sadly it isn't working it actually is coming back to haunt me no matter what i do.

Anyway any advice on how to get rid of this terrible depression?
Newgrounds wouldn't distract me personally.

Shit's gonna suck for a while, take things easy on yourself. Especially for the first few days just try to keep yourself distracted, go outside and have an adventure, hang out with friends, do something you don't normally do. Just try to keep your mind off it. Your gonna have to deal with it emotionally but at the beginning I think norming to just not having that person in your life constantly is enough.

Chill with friends as much as you can, if your of age alcohol can either be great or the worst idea ever, you'd know better then I would. Just make sure if you do get drunk you give your phone to someone else so you can't contact your ex. Find someone who won't mind if you bitch to them.

Here's something I forgot to mention. I've dealt with break ups before butt this one had a bigger imact then I thought. Why the hell is this happening. Also I'm on day 3 of the breakup. We still agreed to be "Very good friends" and we both were sincer about it


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Response to Relationship Crew 2013-03-27 17:00:27 Reply

At 3/26/13 06:56 PM, Wegra wrote: Here's something I forgot to mention. I've dealt with break ups before butt this one had a bigger imact then I thought. Why the hell is this happening. Also I'm on day 3 of the breakup. We still agreed to be "Very good friends" and we both were sincer about it

When your together for as long as you were it makes sense. I'd really just say to let close friends know your not entirely alright and that you could use support. I've never been in a long distance thing for very long but I imagine talking to that person in whatever way must just become such a big part of your routine that having it all of a sudden disappear leaves a definite void in your life. I'm not great with breakups either, I'd just suggest trying to find something to keep your mind off it and get support from whoever your close to if you need it.

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Response to Relationship Crew 2013-03-27 18:12:57 Reply

At 3/27/13 05:00 PM, the-goatman wrote:
At 3/26/13 06:56 PM, Wegra wrote: Here's something I forgot to mention. I've dealt with break ups before butt this one had a bigger imact then I thought. Why the hell is this happening. Also I'm on day 3 of the breakup. We still agreed to be "Very good friends" and we both were sincer about it
When your together for as long as you were it makes sense. I'd really just say to let close friends know your not entirely alright and that you could use support. I've never been in a long distance thing for very long but I imagine talking to that person in whatever way must just become such a big part of your routine that having it all of a sudden disappear leaves a definite void in your life. I'm not great with breakups either, I'd just suggest trying to find something to keep your mind off it and get support from whoever your close to if you need it.

More shit I forgot to mention.

We have met up quite a lot last year but this year not so much. Also there's this guy that might try to be stealing her away.I mean he doesn't look terrible but I snooped around facebook and he kinda has a real shit taste in movies, video games, and tv. Not to mention before our relationship ended I think he confessed he loved her and said some mushy crap. I was okay with this sorta but I don't know there's something about this guy I really don't like and I'm not sure if it's jeallousy or something else. She described him as a bit shy and "similar to me" but eh.....


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Response to Relationship Crew 2013-03-28 19:46:29 Reply

An interested person there will win out over a good person too far away.

Just focus on taking care of you. Best to not even talk to her at all for about a month or so, no matter how hard it feels sometimes, avoid speaking to her.


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Response to Relationship Crew 2013-03-29 11:33:17 Reply

Hey I need some help here.

So I broke up with my girlfriend of one year. We broke up several times and this time was the last. It was all because it felt like she didn't appreciate me and she didn't show me that she did love me. It was always me doing everything and rarely does she does something for me. I mean, I don't expect a lot, but a text or a "hey how are you doing" would suffice but I don't see that.

Anyway, we broke up. But this time she took it hard. Because according to her, she finally learned how to love and now I'm leaving her. Her family has been telling me she's changed and she has been crying a lot and stuff. I do feel guilty about it.

After all the emotional turmoil, another girl expressed interest and me and we hooked up. She knew how to make me feel appreciated and stuff and I really like this girl.

At the same time, I keep comparing this new girl to my ex. With my ex, I could talk all kinds of topics for hours and hours and I wont feel bored. With the new one, it doesn't feel the same. I also feel guilty that I left her.

I keep thinking about her and it just feels like if I was with my ex, it would probably be better but the fact we broke up several times and people keep telling me to break off the relationship over the course of the year makes me think other wise?

So tell me, what do I do? I wanna get over this guilt.


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Response to Relationship Crew 2013-03-29 12:03:12 Reply

Hi, need some help here.
I just go to whatever place I go to pick up girls - usually the beach or downtown, never clubs or bars. I can open conversation without a problem. Not always sure what to do after because opening conversation is the easy part. But supposedly I do manage to get the conversation going - everything goes fine - troubles arrive when it's time for me to close. Either I ask them out then and there or at least to get the phone number. The answer is always no. And by 'always' I don't even mean 90% but 100%. Yeah, never even managed to ask a girl out because always got rejected. It's very frustrating and really hurts my motivation to try again and again, not even mentioning what it does to my confidence...
What on earth is the matter with me? How can I fix this? And how unusual/lame is it for a guy to be almost 20 and not even being out on a date from 1-5 (1 - normal. 5 - can't be more lame than that).

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Response to Relationship Crew 2013-03-29 16:57:05 Reply

At 3/29/13 11:33 AM, jackripperz wrote: Hey I need some help here.

So I broke up with my girlfriend of one year. We broke up several times and this time was the last. It was all because it felt like she didn't appreciate me and she didn't show me that she did love me. It was always me doing everything and rarely does she does something for me. I mean, I don't expect a lot, but a text or a "hey how are you doing" would suffice but I don't see that.

I keep thinking about her and it just feels like if I was with my ex, it would probably be better but the fact we broke up several times and people keep telling me to break off the relationship over the course of the year makes me think other wise?

So tell me, what do I do? I wanna get over this guilt.

Some people are more romantic than others and different people show affection in different ways.
I think it's interesting that to you it seems you loved her more yet you are the one who ended the relationship. If she didn't like you, why was she staying in it?
Did you ever tell her you'd feel better if she showed a little more affection and suggest ways how to do that?

It also may be that you have certain expectations of what affection is or how someone should make you feel appreciated. Instead of noticing that what you expect doesn't happen, look for what does happen and focus on those moments.
I tend to be very affection/appreciative and I'm with a guy who is much more subtle.

I don't think you actually like new girl, I just think she's filling the need to be desired that you had and that's the only thing you like about her. Your ex seems much more substantial and your insecurity in your relationship seems like something better worked on.

If you try to get her back and she says yes, obviously she likes you more than you'd thought. I think it's worth a try.


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Response to Relationship Crew 2013-03-29 19:24:36 Reply

At 3/29/13 04:57 PM, Sensationalism wrote:
At 3/29/13 11:33 AM, jackripperz wrote:

Some people are more romantic than others and different people show affection in different ways.
I think it's interesting that to you it seems you loved her more yet you are the one who ended the relationship. If she didn't like you, why was she staying in it?

It was really emotionally draining for me. I would always find her talking to her friends most of the time. But the worst part is when I was physically next to her and she'd ignore me if there were her friends around. And I'd spent time waiting until I was bored and feeling ignored.

Did you ever tell her you'd feel better if she showed a little more affection and suggest ways how to do that?

I did. She kept telling me she understands but we usually get into arguments about this particular topic. She never had a boyfriend before so she really has no clue what to do in a relationship though I feel that's sort of a weird thing. Maybe she has no interest in me eh?


It also may be that you have certain expectations of what affection is or how someone should make you feel appreciated. Instead of noticing that what you expect doesn't happen, look for what does happen and focus on those moments.
I tend to be very affection/appreciative and I'm with a guy who is much more subtle.

I do. There has been moments where I notice she's a bit more caring and stuff, but it's usually overshadowed with what she's doing thats hurting my feelings.

We were on the phone once and suddenly someone else called her on her cell phone (I called using the house phone because it was free. Yeah, tell you about that later.) She told me who it was and I know that she doesn't like him as well.

It was some dude who kept lying to girls to get their attention and affection. He was targetting my ex for a long time but she never really cared. I thought she was gonna talk for 3-5 minutes and continue conversing with me. Then she left me waiting while I hear her laugh over the phone with the guy for over 40 minutes.

That really pissed me off and hurt me. And we just finished making up and when that happens I was in a sour mood again.


I don't think you actually like new girl, I just think she's filling the need to be desired that you had and that's the only thing you like about her. Your ex seems much more substantial and your insecurity in your relationship seems like something better worked on.

True, I do think so too. But at the same time, I feel like if I do go back to my ex, she'll do the same thing over and over again. I have been enduring the pain for a long time. With her ignoring me, and placing me last in her list of priorities. My friends keep telling me I should break it off because it really looks like one-sided and even when I told my mom I broke up, she was like "I'm so glad. She really didn't look like she had that intimacy or passion for you."

I obviously did though coz her parents still talk to me on occasion and invite for me lunch and stuff. Really is weird.


If you try to get her back and she says yes, obviously she likes you more than you'd thought. I think it's worth a try.

There's nothing more, that I would like, than to be in a loving relationship with the girl that I love. But my heart can't take it anymore. Sometimes I would literally feel tired after going through all that emotional roller coaster.

I'm sorry. I really have no one to ask for advice. Everyone around me keeps saying "No, don't get back with her. No." and all I need is some logical and at the same time professional advice. I mean, the Relationship Crew has been on NG forums as long as I can remember.

And thanks. That last line perked me up a bit.


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Response to Relationship Crew 2013-04-16 22:53:23 Reply

Okay I'll post in here and see what you guys have to say.

So my guy and I want to move in together. I have a full time job but we're waiting for him to get one too before we start looking for a place.

Neither of us want kids.
I want a dog/s but he says he doesn't want one ever. I can live with that.
But he doesn't want my birds around either. I have three right now, two keets and a tiel. The keets I am not too attached to, they're around to entertain and harrass my tiel. My cockatiel however is 16 years old and I'm never ever getting rid of him. (I also always hoped to breed him and keep one of his sons) but yeah my guy is all no not even him, me or the bird.
I really want to live with my guy but there is seriously no way I'm ever giving up my bird.
He was never raised with pets, he doesn't understand it at all.
what do.


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Response to Relationship Crew 2013-04-18 20:39:59 Reply

At 4/16/13 10:53 PM, Sensationalism wrote: Okay I'll post in here and see what you guys have to say.

So my guy and I want to move in together. I have a full time job but we're waiting for him to get one too before we start looking for a place.

Neither of us want kids.
I want a dog/s but he says he doesn't want one ever. I can live with that.
But he doesn't want my birds around either. I have three right now, two keets and a tiel. The keets I am not too attached to, they're around to entertain and harrass my tiel. My cockatiel however is 16 years old and I'm never ever getting rid of him. (I also always hoped to breed him and keep one of his sons) but yeah my guy is all no not even him, me or the bird.
I really want to live with my guy but there is seriously no way I'm ever giving up my bird.
He was never raised with pets, he doesn't understand it at all.
what do.

Well, really, if they can't accept who you are and what your likes/dislikes are, why are you still with them? If the birds are a potential health hazard to him, its a different story.

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Response to Relationship Crew 2013-04-19 02:07:26 Reply

At 4/16/13 10:53 PM, Sensationalism wrote: Okay I'll post in here and see what you guys have to say.

So my guy and I want to move in together. I have a full time job but we're waiting for him to get one too before we start looking for a place.

Neither of us want kids.
I want a dog/s but he says he doesn't want one ever. I can live with that.
But he doesn't want my birds around either. I have three right now, two keets and a tiel. The keets I am not too attached to, they're around to entertain and harrass my tiel. My cockatiel however is 16 years old and I'm never ever getting rid of him. (I also always hoped to breed him and keep one of his sons) but yeah my guy is all no not even him, me or the bird.
I really want to live with my guy but there is seriously no way I'm ever giving up my bird.
He was never raised with pets, he doesn't understand it at all.
what do.

Is there a specific reason he doesn't want them around or is he just not fond of animals in general?

I'd say just let him know how important your bird(s) is to you. 16 years is a long ass commitment to a pet and it seems a bit unreasonable for him to request you get rid of them just because. I don't think people who were raised without animals necessarily can relate to how important that bond can be, I'd say just really try to make him understand that.

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Response to Relationship Crew 2013-04-20 00:22:24 Reply

At 4/18/13 08:39 PM, zmatt007 wrote: Well, really, if they can't accept who you are and what your likes/dislikes are, why are you still with them? If the birds are a potential health hazard to him, its a different story.

Oh this person has accepted me more than I accept myself. I can't see splitting up because we have one difference of opinion.

At 4/19/13 02:07 AM, the-goatman wrote: Is there a specific reason he doesn't want them around or is he just not fond of animals in general?

I'd say just let him know how important your bird(s) is to you. 16 years is a long ass commitment to a pet and it seems a bit unreasonable for him to request you get rid of them just because. I don't think people who were raised without animals necessarily can relate to how important that bond can be, I'd say just really try to make him understand that.

He's not fond of animals in general. He doesn't want to hear them or have any messes because of them.
I agree with the not being able to relate to an animal bond if you've never had a pet.

I'm not sure if he's super serious or just trying to test me or exert dominance over me or what. But I feel like in the end I'll get what I want anyway. Though it's made me worry a bit.


The sig that I'm wearin? Awesomely made by Skaren!
Also, I like annoying Americans by calling English football "real football" and American football "rugby".-Lost-Chances

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Sensationalism
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Response to Relationship Crew 2013-05-19 23:21:19 Reply

For some reason I always have trouble finding this crew in the clubs and crews section despite looking at both pages. I am confused about that.


The sig that I'm wearin? Awesomely made by Skaren!
Also, I like annoying Americans by calling English football "real football" and American football "rugby".-Lost-Chances

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Response to Relationship Crew 2013-05-20 07:30:08 Reply

At 3/7/13 01:20 AM, Penrodeo wrote: I'm visiting her this upcoming Tuesday and staying til Thursday. She picked those days because her husband works those days and he's never home during the week anyways.

Thursday March 7: "visiting her this upcoming tuesday"
Monday March 11: Last known post on Newgrounds

Dead???

deathbymanga
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Response to Relationship Crew 2013-05-26 11:36:46 Reply

I don't know what i want anymore. I think I'm just making more and more compromises on who'd i'd like to be that i'll settle for just someone who'll hug me. Do you realize how hard it is to get any form of physical contact in this day and age? I have very tactile senses. I need to feel. And I can't even get my own sister to willingly hug me. I'm not even that ugly a guy, I'm pretty attractive if i do say so. I'm a little stressful to be around sometimes, but i always thought the good outweighed the bad with me.

Sometimes I don't know what the point is to have a sense of touch if you aren't ever going to be touched

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Response to Relationship Crew 2013-05-26 23:49:28 Reply

At 5/26/13 11:36 AM, deathbymanga wrote: I don't know what i want anymore. I think I'm just making more and more compromises on who'd i'd like to be that i'll settle for just someone who'll hug me.

I think the problem is here. You sound like you're desperate and eager for human contact. That's understandable when you're feeling lonely, but acting desperate is only going to drive people away.

Could you elaborate on your situation? Do you have close friends? Are you pursuing a relationship? Why do you think it's so hard for you to get human contact in the first place?

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Response to Relationship Crew 2013-05-27 00:11:43 Reply

At 5/26/13 11:49 PM, Entice wrote:
At 5/26/13 11:36 AM, deathbymanga wrote: I don't know what i want anymore. I think I'm just making more and more compromises on who'd i'd like to be that i'll settle for just someone who'll hug me.
I think the problem is here. You sound like you're desperate and eager for human contact. That's understandable when you're feeling lonely, but acting desperate is only going to drive people away.

Could you elaborate on your situation? Do you have close friends? Are you pursuing a relationship? Why do you think it's so hard for you to get human contact in the first place?

Agreed. I think you give off that stench and creep people out. I'm a big cuddler myself and can annoy people who like their space. But I don't think it ever comes off as creepy or desperate. Just cute and annoying. And I never do feel desperate about it.

Also an update on my situation: I can have birds but no dogs. Win lol.


The sig that I'm wearin? Awesomely made by Skaren!
Also, I like annoying Americans by calling English football "real football" and American football "rugby".-Lost-Chances

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Response to Relationship Crew 2013-05-27 00:31:19 Reply

At 5/27/13 12:11 AM, Sensationalism wrote:
At 5/26/13 11:49 PM, Entice wrote:
At 5/26/13 11:36 AM, deathbymanga wrote: I don't know what i want anymore. I think I'm just making more and more compromises on who'd i'd like to be that i'll settle for just someone who'll hug me.
I think the problem is here. You sound like you're desperate and eager for human contact. That's understandable when you're feeling lonely, but acting desperate is only going to drive people away.

Could you elaborate on your situation? Do you have close friends? Are you pursuing a relationship? Why do you think it's so hard for you to get human contact in the first place?
Agreed. I think you give off that stench and creep people out. I'm a big cuddler myself and can annoy people who like their space. But I don't think it ever comes off as creepy or desperate. Just cute and annoying. And I never do feel desperate about it.

Also an update on my situation: I can have birds but no dogs. Win lol.

the only people i get physical with are my male friends, and even though i am exploring the idea of men, i don't feel anything for any of my male friends.

The problem with my situation is actually rather unique. I don't throw myself around begging for dates, i ask people now and then if they know anyone single, but i never ask the same person twice or in that person's company. I live out in the sticks with no real social gathering location except for bars, and i'm only 19, so i can't head there yet.

A big major problem though i found is actually a really weird one. I have never once been invited. i have made myself out to be a very social person who also keeps to himself now and then, but my friends all go out to do all kinds of stuff together and never invite me. this doesn't just stretch to parties or going out. I ALWAYS have to invite myself into a group of my friends, even though i'm always welcomed and everyone treats me with positivity. I have no idea what is wrong with me, but I seem to be a number everyone knows, but nobody bothers to put in their contacts list

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Response to Relationship Crew 2013-05-27 01:32:38 Reply

Reading through this thread really makes me realize how jaded and cynical I am. I'm also relieved that I have people in my life that I can talk to rather than confessing my life story to an online forum. I guess that sounds disrespectful, but I didn't intend for it to be so.


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Response to Relationship Crew 2013-05-27 04:03:24 Reply

At 5/27/13 12:31 AM, deathbymanga wrote: A big major problem though i found is actually a really weird one. I have never once been invited. i have made myself out to be a very social person who also keeps to himself now and then, but my friends all go out to do all kinds of stuff together and never invite me. this doesn't just stretch to parties or going out. I ALWAYS have to invite myself into a group of my friends, even though i'm always welcomed and everyone treats me with positivity. I have no idea what is wrong with me, but I seem to be a number everyone knows, but nobody bothers to put in their contacts list.

You say you're a very social person but I wonder what that means to you. You see, quite often I find that people are great to hang out with, they're really funny, can make you laugh, etc. However, a lot of those people have little or no interest in the people they hang out with beyond the moment itself.
I've had close friends who slowly grew out of the group, simply because they went from being interest in everybody as a person to only wanting to have fun and caring only about that.
So I wonder, do you show any personal interest in any of your friends? What do you know about their lifes, their ambitions, what they're doing right now with their personal lifes, how they feel, etc.?

Knowing these things and showing interest in them makes a world of difference. Most people are great talking about themselves and enjoy doing it very much. The point is that nobody really likes a person who only talks about himself. So instead, ask all your friends about them and don't tell anything about yourself unless they ask. You'll be the best conversationalist they've ever met and will surely be interested in you as well and will want you to be around them.


"Never was anything great achieved without danger." - Niccolo Machiavelli

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