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Sensationalism
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Response to Relationship Crew Aug. 26th, 2012 @ 09:33 PM Reply

At 8/26/12 11:03 AM, MudkipsPiano wrote: so im in a tight spot right now.

i just moved into college and ive had a girlfriend for 3 months or so. it's a long distance relationship. i love her, but
she's also almost forcing me to transfer out of my school and move closer to her. if not, she's going to go ballistics. kinda ruining college for me because this place is awesome.

From this I'd say explain to her that you like her very much and plan on staying with her but her behavior lately is really annoying and making you want to stop being around her. And then come up with compromises so you have more freedom and she has more security.


I've pretty much fallen for another girl right off the bat and i don't know what to do. i'm involved in an ldr which i don't even feel like being in anymore and this girl probably knows im in a relationship and is pissed about it. breaking up will be such a nightmare i don't even think it's possible.

But then there's that which changes things. Now you absolutely better break up with your gf. It's not fair to be liking and flirting with someone else while still with her. Especially if something happened it'd be pretty easy to cheat on her and that would be very bad. Now you've got to tell her there's someone else and you're breaking up with her. You're long distance so I don't know why you're worried about her or her mom being able to do anything. You can block them from things if they try to contact you.


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Vincoid
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Response to Relationship Crew Aug. 28th, 2012 @ 06:36 AM Reply

At 8/26/12 11:16 AM, DarkSoldier wrote:
At 8/26/12 11:03 AM, MudkipsPiano wrote: I've pretty much fallen for another girl right off the bat and i don't know what to do. i'm involved in an ldr which i don't even feel like being in anymore and this girl probably knows im in a relationship and is pissed about it. breaking up will be such a nightmare i don't even think it's possible.
Break off the relationship. It seems like a problematic relationship and that's no fun. From my view, not breaking up will be more of a nightmare for you than if you do breakup.

A word of advice: Close relationships are always better.

Agreed. Whoever thought of something like long distance relationships is an idiot. Why are you in a relationship with someone? Because you like them for who they are. So what do you want to do? Do you want to be able to say to people that you're with that person, or do you actually want to be with that person? So obviously, there's absolutely no point in having a long distance relationship.

Secondly, what are your ex-gf and her mom going to do about you breaking up with her? Explain to them what the problem is, that you're over her and then move on. They don't have any other choice than letting you live your own life. If they think they do, there's always restraining orders.


"Never was anything great achieved without danger." - Niccolo Machiavelli

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Glides
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Response to Relationship Crew Sep. 7th, 2012 @ 01:49 AM Reply

At 9/7/12 12:25 AM, HydraTundra wrote: I don't know whether I should break it off with my Fiance or not. The emotional pain he is causing me is destroying my self-worth. I tried talking to him about it and I was honest when I told him certain things he did hurt me. But,he acted as if it was my own personal problem and brought up unrelated things. I want to make it work,but I don't know how to get the message across properly. Please note: I am not a person who emotional lashes out on people,I do not yell or angrily storm out.
I usually try to get the message across by saying,"I feel hurt when you..____________." It fails to work...

This might be a little personal but what gender are you? I have very little experience in this matter (being neither unmarried or a woman or gay, whichever you are) but I'll do what I can:
If that's the way you're being treated, that's not fair to you. A relationship is entirely about equality. So you'll probably have to lay it on a little thick. If it continues hurting, don't subject yourself to that. Tell him exactly what you want, and what you deserve.

Seems to be the best bet I can think of. Hopefully this helps and hopefully it all works out for you.
See, Vincoid, I can be nice :D


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Glides
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Response to Relationship Crew Sep. 8th, 2012 @ 04:26 PM Reply

I'm a lady,and thank you kindly. That was great advice,went through with it. Odd sense of freedom,and uncertainty.. I feel cold for not crying though. I was more upset being in the relationship than being out,guess that means I've made the right decision. Thankfully,I can go back into the AirForce. I could not become enlisted before because he was Lieutenant. So hopefully my future will brighten up with more possibilities. Just going to hit the play button and run till I feel exhausted. :) I hope you have a lovely weekend,and thanks for the help.

Anytime at all. Curious question: how come his being a Lieutenant prevented you from enlisting? I know almost nothing about that sort of thing, so I apologize if it's a dumb question. But either way, glad I was able to help and hopefully you find what you're looking for. And if you're joining the Air Force or whatever you decide to do, thank you for your service.
And remember to always look on the bright side of life.


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Patton3
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Response to Relationship Crew Sep. 10th, 2012 @ 10:26 PM Reply

Well, there's a girl I've been friends with for about two years now. We've grown quite close, and we're very much alike; "I only have an hour" invariably turns into the two of us talking away five hours, we even this past summer organized a charity event together... at which we were asked if we were married. It seems that not a day goes by that I don't think of her.
I've asked her out once in the past, perhaps four or so months ago. I was browsing one site or another and I came across a faux rose painted as a pokeball, a tag reading "I choose you!". A few days later when she and I were together somehow it came up in conversation that she had a rule about not dating friends since a previous relationship had gone awry. I gave her the rose regardless, telling her that her rule aside it would mean a lot to me if she would take it. It was a somber moment when she seemed for lack of a better word distraught, and told me in so many words that it had gone so wrong before with another friend. She still has it in a little vase by her dresser.
Fast forward to the night before last, and once again in conversation relationships came up, as did her rule about not dating friends. That she has difficulty with codependency, something necessary to a degree in a relationship, and that she hasn't found a case before where she reciprocates the love another feels for her. And in the case that fostered her rule of not dating friends, she knows just how badly she hurt him. In her own words, she's broken quite a few hearts. Hence she's been avoiding relationships as she doesn't want to do that to anyone, and fears dissolving a friendship and hurting someone else.

I want so badly to alleviate that fear, but everything that came to my mind then and is coming now I fear will only make her feel pressured and push her away. And maybe she's right that things would fall apart. Maybe a friendship would dissolve. Maybe she'd break my heart into tiny little pieces. Though the way I feel about her, were she willing, it's a risk I would take and fight tooth and nail to keep from coming to the worst. And that she took such care in telling me that she fears she'd hurt me, I can't help but wonder if feelings are reciprocated but she fears things would fall apart. Though I don't know what I'd do with myself if I pushed her away because of what I wanted.

I know what I feel, and I know I need to express that to her in no unclear terms. But her sensitivity on the subject... I want to know just how I might go about telling her.


If life gives you lemons, read the fine print; chances are, there's a monthly fee attached.

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UltimateCJ64
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Response to Relationship Crew Sep. 22nd, 2012 @ 01:16 AM Reply

Okay guys, hope you don't mind this post... I'm not sure if this is less appropriate here (based on most posts I've seen), but I figure I'll get a lot of riff raff from the General forums, so here goes...

My girlfriend and I had known each other for about two years, and we got along too well, so I finally got the guts to ask her out in March this year (she said yes, one of those rare just-friends to boyfriend/girlfriend situations). It's the first relationship for both of us, so we're still kinda getting used to more intimate stuff (for example, I just got second base last month). Sadly, I'm leaving for basic mid-November, so we're trying to plan our "first time" before I go. We're still not completely comfortable with having to rush ourselves, but I'll be gone for a few months. I need tips, anything from experienced guys. (And please don't make fun of me for being 19 and a virgin.)


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Glides
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Response to Relationship Crew Sep. 23rd, 2012 @ 01:43 AM Reply

At 9/22/12 01:16 AM, UltimateCJ64 wrote: Okay guys, hope you don't mind this post... I'm not sure if this is less appropriate here (based on most posts I've seen), but I figure I'll get a lot of riff raff from the General forums, so here goes...

I honestly don't blame you on that count. The General forums are generally where the trolls hang out. Don't ever use those for anything serious, I learned that the hard way.


My girlfriend and I had known each other for about two years, and we got along too well, so I finally got the guts to ask her out in March this year (she said yes, one of those rare just-friends to boyfriend/girlfriend situations). It's the first relationship for both of us, so we're still kinda getting used to more intimate stuff (for example, I just got second base last month). Sadly, I'm leaving for basic mid-November, so we're trying to plan our "first time" before I go. We're still not completely comfortable with having to rush ourselves, but I'll be gone for a few months. I need tips, anything from experienced guys. (And please don't make fun of me for being 19 and a virgin.)

I'm 17 and still a virgin myself, I don't think I could get away with that. So maybe I'm not the best to talk to, because I don't even have a girlfriend. Nor have I done any of that...stuff, so yeah.
Point being, I think rushing it is kind of stupid. I wouldn't want to rush something like that. If that's what you wanna do, go ahead, but personally I don't agree.
And being a virgin, I can't help out with the "tips." I will say from what I know scientifically that you gotta be careful the first time, obviously.


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Jeromia
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Response to Relationship Crew Sep. 23rd, 2012 @ 01:01 PM Reply

Hello there everyone, I think it's time to throw down my own relationship woos... yey >___>

And yeah, I'm probably stupid for doing it here. But whatever I need help and I'm shameless in saying that... so here goes

~~~LONG STORY WARNING~~~ :\ (sorry people)

Okay, so I like this girl (a lot) and from the moment I actually saw her, which was the start of the school year. She is gorgeous, cute and beautiful in my opinion (she is rather shy I found out... read on). I'm not attracted to her for lust, although that is apart of it. No, rather I want to be with here more then anything else. I avoid the word love here (although it mostly likely true that I love her,) because I used to love someone else in my past, and well, sadly that word doesn't sound right these days.

Anyways, the big issue I've had ever since I've being attracted to the opposite sex was confidence, as I didn't have any to began with thanks to being bullied a lot from when I was a kid to up until this year (I go to a better school now) and being somewhat neglected by my parents until they realized that I'd probably end up in their basement if I didn't get my shit together (yey). Thankfully, my confidence and my life is on track now, and all things are going OKAY... but I still need to get my shit together though -_-"

If you wondering about past attempts, each time I tried to start an intimate relationship with another girl, It would always turn out disastrous. Because of that,I told myself to not bother her and just worry about school and my life in general. So nothing happened other then me wishing, hoping and at times thinking along the lines of "don't do anything yet... your beneath her... she will just reject you" (yeah... that was my problem then) until about 2 months ago or so.

See, a friend of mine during class was joking around, trying to set me up with some random girls from my class (he was being loud... making sure the other girls could hear). Not wanting to go out with any of the girls he suggested, I told him that I didn't want to be with any of them, as I "liked someone else". Of course, as he was loud after all, they got interested and they asked whom I liked, and I realized then that I had an opportunity here to let my interest know of me and so I told them.

Basically, the idea was this:

1. Tell people that I like her
2. Wait until she hears about it
3. Get a response from her so I can talk to her

I did this because I simply was too fearful, so I was hoping that this would at least show her that I am interested in her before trying anything.

Well, it did work... kinda, as then she knew that I actually liked her (as her friends confirmed it) but things got worse from then on.

Although she showed interest in me, (sending signals kinda stuff) I tried to approach her, but was unable to do so because I was too afraid (self-esteem issues, annoying pasts, you know the drill). This reduced my confidence a lot and made me believe that I should go back to my previous state and just not bother with any of it until I get everything else in my life sorted.

Unfortunately, whilst I was thinking these thoughts before a class, her friends asked me a particular question when she was around, i.e. if I would like to ask a "particular person out, whom you know, has the initials of blah.blah". Being the stupid and tierd person that I am sometimes (I was mostly sleepy at school in those days, so I couldn't pay much attention to surprise stuff like this) I responded "Look, I really don't have the time to bother with that right now because I have more important things to do"... and right in front of her...

smooth Jeromia... smooth

I was too tired to catch on that they were talking about her and I didn't realize what I said had a huge negative impact until half way through a class. Thankfully, she is still interested in me, but she has being avoiding me. Thanks to her avoiding me, it made it to interact with her at all, as now I'm usually too worried if I'm being too pushy or not doing enough whenever I get the chance to be around her (as I don't want to bother her)

Secondly, thanks to me opening up about my feelings, other girls have started to show more interest in me then before. Well, before people were hitting on me here and there, but I never took much interest in it, only dismissing it as a weird coincidence. However it became a more regular event and they tried more pushy ways of getting my interest. It became from people just giving me interested looks and at one case surprising me with proclaiming "YOUR MY FRIEND NOW!" (that went nowhere btw XD), to people engaging highly in conversation or in one case trying to kiss me... yeah O_o . (I emphasis "trying" btw because it didn't work... it also had no harsh consequences on me but that other person made herself look like a fool, that's about it really.)

Thankfully I'm a disciplined individual, so I don't have problems being patient and trying to find a good opportunity to talk to her (so don't worry about that). Issue is, this also makes it more difficult to make concise decisions, as at times I have my moments of doubt, and I wonder whether I should just do the easier thing and go out with someone else (I am human you know... :\ ), which gets me to my next point.

The third problem, and this is the worse in my opinion. The involvement of her friends has spiraled out of control. They were first really interested in this (as they thought it was cute) and encouraged me to talk to her and still do. However, although i don't know what sort of dramas is going on, I have a feeling that me telling everyone about my feelings made a mess. Whether this is big or not, I don't know yet... it's a mystery to me as I'm not in enough in those circles to know. But it's worrying and it is something that I want to apologize for... even if it turns out it's not I want to because well I'm worried...

Anyways, this entire thing has hit me hard, mentally and emotionally. I felt somewhat depressed and had to go through anxiety issues last week. Here's some symptoms so you get my general level of worry:

Staying up all night until the sun comes up, distracting myself with anything to ease the stress of thinking about my problems.
Getting MASSIVELY confused about the world around me when I do wake up... "Is it morning? is it night? Wait, should I sleep soon or should I stay awake now? Am I actually tired now or should I stay up for a little longer?" ... hard to explain but it was an annoyance for a while, especially that I had block exams on that week (a week full of exam shenanigans! :D YEY! *sarcasm*). We had to get a medical certificate to reschedule one exam, as I slept through the day and didn't turn up to school. And on top of that, I didn't do well in general... Oh joy.

Thankfully, I am on a holiday and my plan is to just enjoy my days relaxing and not bothering with anything but my music, video games, some tv shows, Taekwondo and basically having fun whilst improving me as a person.

But there are some questions that I really need answers for here:
1. What could she be feeling that is making her avoid me? Is it because of my actions, or is it because of some other personal reason? (I was told that she was shy and that's why she is avoiding me, but I don't know... I doubt it has to do with me not being attractive... as I am I think :\)
2. How pushy should I be about this? What should I do? I have several ideas and here they are:
2a) Tell her my number/ask for hers and text her... Hopefully get a conversation going and ease some of the tension between us.
2b) Tell her in person my worries.
3. Is there something I'm missing here? Just want to know if I am.

Anyways, geez this took WAY too long to make, and sorry if it's ridiculously long. I'd be very appreciative if one of you guys can make sensible recommendations to help me out, as I really like (or love? idk) this person and I want to make the right decision and for once have a good relationship for a change. (hence all the stress)


SON OF A SOLAR SYSTEM!

Jeromia
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Response to Relationship Crew Sep. 23rd, 2012 @ 01:03 PM Reply

If this turns out to be a bad idea, it is possible to delete that post? >_>


SON OF A SOLAR SYSTEM!

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Response to Relationship Crew Sep. 24th, 2012 @ 07:12 PM Reply

At 9/23/12 01:01 PM, Jeromia wrote: Hello there everyone, I think it's time to throw down my own relationship woos... yey >___>

And yeah, I'm probably stupid for doing it here. But whatever I need help and I'm shameless in saying that... so here goes

~~~LONG STORY WARNING~~~ :\ (sorry people)

Okay, so I like this girl (a lot) and from the moment I actually saw her, which was the start of the school year. She is gorgeous, cute and beautiful in my opinion (she is rather shy I found out... read on). I'm not attracted to her for lust, although that is apart of it. No, rather I want to be with here more then anything else. I avoid the word love here (although it mostly likely true that I love her,) because I used to love someone else in my past, and well, sadly that word doesn't sound right these days.

Probably not love. As cynical as that may sound. I would say you're intensely attracted to the girl, no harm in that, I think.
Trivial question: how old are you? I'm guessing around high school age.


Anyways, the big issue I've had ever since I've being attracted to the opposite sex was confidence, as I didn't have any to began with thanks to being bullied a lot from when I was a kid to up until this year (I go to a better school now) and being somewhat neglected by my parents until they realized that I'd probably end up in their basement if I didn't get my shit together (yey). Thankfully, my confidence and my life is on track now, and all things are going OKAY... but I still need to get my shit together though -_-"

The neglect thing isn't just you; I can assure you that everyone I know had the exact same issue with their parents. As for bullying, less often. I was bullied also until high school, where no one gives a shit about you. So not a problem for you.


If you wondering about past attempts, each time I tried to start an intimate relationship with another girl, It would always turn out disastrous. Because of that,I told myself to not bother her and just worry about school and my life in general. So nothing happened other then me wishing, hoping and at times thinking along the lines of "don't do anything yet... your beneath her... she will just reject you" (yeah... that was my problem then) until about 2 months ago or so.

That was me in high school, kid, and it sucked. Women have that strange effect, after all.


See, a friend of mine during class was joking around, trying to set me up with some random girls from my class (he was being loud... making sure the other girls could hear). Not wanting to go out with any of the girls he suggested, I told him that I didn't want to be with any of them, as I "liked someone else". Of course, as he was loud after all, they got interested and they asked whom I liked, and I realized then that I had an opportunity here to let my interest know of me and so I told them.

Basically, the idea was this:
1. Tell people that I like her
2. Wait until she hears about it
3. Get a response from her so I can talk to her
I did this because I simply was too fearful, so I was hoping that this would at least show her that I am interested in her before trying anything.

Again, we could be twins. The exact same thing happened to me, except the girl in question had a boyfriend. In hindsight, this passive way of revealing attraction does not work well.

Unfortunately, whilst I was thinking these thoughts before a class, her friends asked me a particular question when she was around, i.e. if I would like to ask a "particular person out, whom you know, has the initials of blah.blah". Being the stupid and tierd person that I am sometimes (I was mostly sleepy at school in those days, so I couldn't pay much attention to surprise stuff like this) I responded "Look, I really don't have the time to bother with that right now because I have more important things to do"... and right in front of her...

Ouch. Still, the other person was kind of retarded for asking personal questions like that in the first place.

I was too tired to catch on that they were talking about her and I didn't realize what I said had a huge negative impact until half way through a class. Thankfully, she is still interested in me, but she has being avoiding me. Thanks to her avoiding me, it made it to interact with her at all, as now I'm usually too worried if I'm being too pushy or not doing enough whenever I get the chance to be around her (as I don't want to bother her)

I would love to take this opportunity to call her a bitch, but I'm not sure. This has happened also to me, and although any chance of anything romantic died out once I did that (different girl), we became friends. Then again, she MAY be a bitch, you said nothing about her personality. And let's face it, the prettier a girl is, the bitchier she is likely to be. Sorry ladies.


Secondly, thanks to me opening up about my feelings, other girls have started to show more interest in me then before. Well, before people were hitting on me here and there, but I never took much interest in it, only dismissing it as a weird coincidence. However it became a more regular event and they tried more pushy ways of getting my interest. It became from people just giving me interested looks and at one case surprising me with proclaiming "YOUR MY FRIEND NOW!" (that went nowhere btw XD), to people engaging highly in conversation or in one case trying to kiss me... yeah O_o . (I emphasis "trying" btw because it didn't work... it also had no harsh consequences on me but that other person made herself look like a fool, that's about it really.)

Hey, that's not so bad, right? I mean if you're getting this much attention, take advantage of it. Find a cute one and start dating her, making the girl jealous. You've already established that she might be a bitch (MIGHT), so this is the perfect way to get her jealous. She gets jealous, wants you for herself, problem solved. They don't tell you that the game of romance is a dirty and backstabbing one. Trust me, people get hurt, lots.

But there are some questions that I really need answers for here:
1. What could she be feeling that is making her avoid me? Is it because of my actions, or is it because of some other personal reason? (I was told that she was shy and that's why she is avoiding me, but I don't know... I doubt it has to do with me not being attractive... as I am I think :\)

Several possibilities. One, she's a bitch, and she's trying to make you suffer. High school girls do this a lot. I know quite a few did that to me. Two, in her own borderline retarded way, she wants you to make a move. Three, she's just weird or something. I don't understand women, I can only make educated guesses.

2. How pushy should I be about this? What should I do? I have several ideas and here they are:
2a) Tell her my number/ask for hers and text her... Hopefully get a conversation going and ease some of the tension between us.
2b) Tell her in person my worries.

Do not do that under any circumstances. No matter how nice she is, she will laugh in your face. Sadly, girls her age can't stand emotion of any kind from dudes (unless you're a girl yourself, you didn't specify that either. In which case, if you're a girl, go ahead). Every time I tried opening up to a girl in high school, I was soundly rejected. Again, it's sad, but true. Obviously you need to display enough to show concern for whatever problem she might have, but don't voice your own complaints. She will not care, believe me.

3. Is there something I'm missing here? Just want to know if I am.

Not exactly, you're just suffering from the "high school sucks ass" phenomenon. Essentially, everyone in high school collectively are morons. You also have a case of the "women make no sense" disease, meaning that women make no sense and no man can ever understand them.
I know that's probably not what you were looking for, but this is the best I have to offer. From one wallflower to another, good luck.


Glides is done with his post.

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Jeromia
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Response to Relationship Crew Sep. 25th, 2012 @ 12:48 AM Reply

At 9/24/12 07:12 PM, Glides wrote: Probably not love. As cynical as that may sound. I would say you're intensely attracted to the girl, no harm in that, I think.
Trivial question: how old are you? I'm guessing around high school age.

You are probably right... Looking back at what I said, I realize now that I actually wanted to be with her for 1.5-2.5 years at most and maybe break it off then as, if everything works according to my long term plans, I'd be moving to another city as my city doesn't have much opportunities in music... (Unless your a heavy metal person :P)... I have tried a long distance relationship before and I know it bullshit. So that's why I'm thinking about that.

But this is plan that may change depending on my future opportunities so idk atm.

Trivial answer: I'm 17 and male but
Pro Tip: Check the person's profile page next time >:3

The neglect thing isn't just you; I can assure you that everyone I know had the exact same issue with their parents. As for bullying, less often. I was bullied also until high school, where no one gives a shit about you. So not a problem for you.

Huzzah? I kinda knew that... It's just a justification for my actions really. Whether that is ethical or not is your pick. :P

The bullying for me wasn't intense in the physical kinda way but in the emotional. People just pilled on crap to the point where I both snapped and became unconfident. But I have logic and intelligence on my side so I got over that after 6 months of praise from fellow peers O.o (in other words, last week XD hahaha)

That was me in high school, kid, and it sucked. Women have that strange effect, after all.

It's probably has to do with the fact that they are confused. Women are supposed to run on emotions right? Well teenage years is the crappiest time for that, as their very minds are changing every day (particularly the front area, a.k.a DECISION MAKING area), so they just troll their way through until they understand what the fuck their brain is telling them to do (I imagine? *shrugs*).

Which means I have three choices really:
a) I go out with someone whom is confused as hell and is going to give me crap
b) Be lonely for a while until the women around you can make concise decisions
c) Miraculously find someone whom isn't confused and have a fair-tail happy ever after *sarcasm*

And sadly, I'm picking a) (it's the most secure pick in my opinion)... so I know I'm going to get crap either way but still... D:

Again, we could be twins. The exact same thing happened to me, except the girl in question had a boyfriend. In hindsight, this passive way of revealing attraction does not work well.

I agree (with both points :P), but I don't think I would not have done it any other way. Think about it, I was unconfident in those days, so I doubt I would have went up to talk to her first. :|

Oh she doesn't have a boyfriend, but she has done the bitchy thing and told me that she "already has some secret for the dance next year" (kids in my school are idiots... planning dance partners for the next year... NARRR!!! D:<).

I'll explain
It happened when her friends invited me to eat with them during lunch... (this was a rushed invite btw and it was the second time). She was around that time, and I shrugged and went along with it. So when I went to sit down, there was no other room but to sit next to her (literally) but she decided to move to another seat still.

After that awkward shuffle, I sat down and everyone started talking, (make assumptions folks) and it then turned to next year's dance discussions. At this stage, they suggested (again) that I should ask her to go to the formal, of which she replied on the lines of "oh I already have someone to go with... I'm keeping him secret for now" I called bullshit and I told her later at some point of that discussion "blah, I really do actually like you, seriously I do." of which she did not reply, but look away (I was making eye contact)... it was weird because I think that she trying to suppress herself from crying as her eyes were starting to water (I think she was embarrassed?)

Anyhow other then that, nothing happened (other then she left the conversation after I said that). When I left, my friend (whom later arrived) told me to come back and talk to her. I told him that "she doesn't want to talk to me man" and I left. (I didn't have room to tell you this earlier.)

Can anyone explain her reaction to me? Rather odd really...

Ouch. Still, the other person was kind of retarded for asking personal questions like that in the first place.

Yes... Indeed that FEMALE person was.

I would love to take this opportunity to call her a bitch, but I'm not sure. This has happened also to me, and although any chance of anything romantic died out once I did that (different girl), we became friends. Then again, she MAY be a bitch, you said nothing about her personality. And let's face it, the prettier a girl is, the bitchier she is likely to be. Sorry ladies.

I'm not sure either... hmmm looking on my previous perspective, she isn't a bitch. But now that I have a new perspective on women (thanks Glides :P) it seems like she is. It's hard to tell though unfortunately, as I don't know her that well to make such decisions... but I will most defiantly find out I know that for sure (people are saying she is shy though... so that factor could be true)

Thankfully though, she didn't take what I said too harshly, so I believe I still have a chance to fix it.

Hey, that's not so bad, right? I mean if you're getting this much attention, take advantage of it. Find a cute one and start dating her, making the girl jealous. You've already established that she might be a bitch (MIGHT), so this is the perfect way to get her jealous. She gets jealous, wants you for herself, problem solved. They don't tell you that the game of romance is a dirty and backstabbing one. Trust me, people get hurt, lots.

Hmmm an option yes... but something I'm comfortable doing? Not really. Although I can and will still talk to anyone I want though... I naturally do that anyways. But I just don't like hurting others for my own selfish reasons...

However if it's an option that I must take I will... but if I have others I will try them first.

Several possibilities. One, she's a bitch, and she's trying to make you suffer. High school girls do this a lot. I know quite a few did that to me. Two, in her own borderline retarded way, she wants you to make a move. Three, she's just weird or something. I don't understand women, I can only make educated guesses.

I think it's a mix of 2 and 3... she might be weird due to something in her past (her friends hinted this is the reason why she was shy...) But I think it's approximately 60% 2 and 40% 3.

Commence the hair pulling!
Do not do that under any circumstances. No matter how nice she is, she will laugh in your face. Sadly, girls her age can't stand emotion of any kind from dudes (unless you're a girl yourself, you didn't specify that either. In which case, if you're a girl, go ahead). Every time I tried opening up to a girl in high school, I was soundly rejected. Again, it's sad, but true. Obviously you need to display enough to show concern for whatever problem she might have, but don't voice your own complaints. She will not care, believe me.

First of all, I would like to say that I laughed at this (hehehe you suggested I was a lesbian XD haha... but good call though. Never know, you know?)

Secondly, ah I kinda get it... So essentially I have to appear COMPLETELY sure of myself and to show her absolutely no insecurities... Is that what you meant?

Not exactly, you're just suffering from the "high school sucks ass" phenomenon. Essentially, everyone in high school collectively are morons.

That has some truth to it XD. But I think that all it requires is just educating them on why they are morons and then that'll change (other then society's ideas that they should educate teenagers on life via shock therapy :P)


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Jeromia
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Response to Relationship Crew Sep. 25th, 2012 @ 01:17 AM Reply

Glides said something else

:You also have a case of the "women make no sense" disease, meaning that women make no sense and no man can ever understand them.
Only those rare few men whom know what they are doing and have studied women closely in the wild for many, many years can truly understand and educate other men on how women work... that's life :3

And life sucks a lot of ass but we have to deal with it :|
So here is a funny picture to lighten up the mood of our awful, awful lack of knowledge in concerns to women... and life.

Relationship Crew


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Response to Relationship Crew Sep. 25th, 2012 @ 06:36 PM Reply

At 9/25/12 12:48 AM, Jeromia wrote: You are probably right... Looking back at what I said, I realize now that I actually wanted to be with her for 1.5-2.5 years at most and maybe break it off then as, if everything works according to my long term plans, I'd be moving to another city as my city doesn't have much opportunities in music... (Unless your a heavy metal person :P)... I have tried a long distance relationship before and I know it bullshit. So that's why I'm thinking about that.

Long distance simply doesn't compare to physically being with someone. I'm not even meaning it in a sexual way, it's literally better to be around that person and actually get to know them. So I would have to agree with you on that.

Trivial answer: I'm 17 and male but
Pro Tip: Check the person's profile page next time >:3

I forgot. Big whoop, wanna fight about it? (get the TV reference, get a cookie)
And I'm 17 too, guess I shouldn't have assumed so much. :P

Huzzah? I kinda knew that... It's just a justification for my actions really. Whether that is ethical or not is your pick. :P

I was merely saying that it's not just you who have a problem because of that, and you can be excused in that regard. So very ethical, yeah.


The bullying for me wasn't intense in the physical kinda way but in the emotional. People just pilled on crap to the point where I both snapped and became unconfident. But I have logic and intelligence on my side so I got over that after 6 months of praise from fellow peers O.o (in other words, last week XD hahaha)

That's depending on who you hung out with. In my case, opinions of me were so varied that I had no idea. Some people hated the very sight of me, others (read: freshman) worshiped me. That will cause confusion, and you seem to be going through something like that.

It's probably has to do with the fact that they are confused. Women are supposed to run on emotions right? Well teenage years is the crappiest time for that, as their very minds are changing every day (particularly the front area, a.k.a DECISION MAKING area), so they just troll their way through until they understand what the fuck their brain is telling them to do (I imagine? *shrugs*).

Sounds good to me. I'll ask an actual woman about that ,since I thankfully know some.


Which means I have three choices really:
a) I go out with someone whom is confused as hell and is going to give me crap

Especially when they're good at hiding that.

b) Be lonely for a while until the women around you can make concise decisions

That may be never. My mother is one of the most irrational women I know, and I can assure you that she's older than me. For some, it never stops.

c) Miraculously find someone whom isn't confused and have a fair-tail happy ever after *sarcasm*

If only, if only...if only that hot girl in English class was single! *sarcasm*


And sadly, I'm picking a) (it's the most secure pick in my opinion)... so I know I'm going to get crap either way but still... D:

Considering the other two, it's the most rational. We don't want to be alone, that's why most relationships begin. Women somehow think that if you don't rave about your boyfriend every second (when they're younger), it's going to end. Thus the annoying as hell Facebook posts. Ladies, we hate that shit. Quit. And the women are just as lonely as we are, thank God. Even the ones with options (99.9% of them)

Oh she doesn't have a boyfriend, but she has done the bitchy thing and told me that she "already has some secret for the dance next year" (kids in my school are idiots... planning dance partners for the next year... NARRR!!! D:<).

Strange, they never did that at my high school...

After that awkward shuffle, I sat down and everyone started talking, (make assumptions folks) and it then turned to next year's dance discussions. At this stage, they suggested (again) that I should ask her to go to the formal, of which she replied on the lines of "oh I already have someone to go with... I'm keeping him secret for now" I called bullshit and I told her later at some point of that discussion "blah, I really do actually like you, seriously I do." of which she did not reply, but look away (I was making eye contact)... it was weird because I think that she trying to suppress herself from crying as her eyes were starting to water (I think she was embarrassed?)

Secrets are for sissies. Or something. I would have to blame general female confusion because of whatever for that incident. Still, though, I don't like her friends at all. There's a saying about people like them where I come from, and it involves a pickup truck and a football player's dick.


Anyhow other then that, nothing happened (other then she left the conversation after I said that). When I left, my friend (whom later arrived) told me to come back and talk to her. I told him that "she doesn't want to talk to me man" and I left. (I didn't have room to tell you this earlier.)

Can anyone explain her reaction to me? Rather odd really...

Again, she's being irrational for the sake of being irrational. What's worse is if she's trying to take advice from teen magazines. I'll let this little tidbit here speak for itself.

I'm not sure either... hmmm looking on my previous perspective, she isn't a bitch. But now that I have a new perspective on women (thanks Glides :P) it seems like she is. It's hard to tell though unfortunately, as I don't know her that well to make such decisions... but I will most defiantly find out I know that for sure (people are saying she is shy though... so that factor could be true)

Women are shy because Twilight *cough hack wheeze* taught them to. Or something. If she ever asks you to whip her or handcuff her, run. Because she read 50 Shades of Terrible.

Hmmm an option yes... but something I'm comfortable doing? Not really. Although I can and will still talk to anyone I want though... I naturally do that anyways. But I just don't like hurting others for my own selfish reasons...

Not hurt, more like try and get her to want to be with you. Both genders do this all the time, or so I've seen. More chutzpah to you if you won't.

I think it's a mix of 2 and 3... she might be weird due to something in her past (her friends hinted this is the reason why she was shy...) But I think it's approximately 60% 2 and 40% 3.

I will not guess.

First of all, I would like to say that I laughed at this (hehehe you suggested I was a lesbian XD haha... but good call though. Never know, you know?)

For all we know, there are lesbian men out there. And that sounded so much like my friend that I was momentarily stunned.


Secondly, ah I kinda get it... So essentially I have to appear COMPLETELY sure of myself and to show her absolutely no insecurities... Is that what you meant?

At least around her. Around people you trust, care about, yadda yadda, be what you want. Essentially be the most confident self that you can be around her. She may not want to see all of "you" at once, but she does want to see it, eventually.


Not exactly, you're just suffering from the "high school sucks ass" phenomenon. Essentially, everyone in high school collectively are morons.
That has some truth to it XD. But I think that all it requires is just educating them on why they are morons and then that'll change (other then society's ideas that they should educate teenagers on life via shock therapy :P)

I'll give you an example to better illustrate my point. Senior year, I'm talking with a group of girls, very hot (for all my kvetching I do talk to pretty people sometimes), and they're talking about one cheating with another guy. Right in the middle of the conversation, the dumb blonde of the group says "But does she love him?"
Needless to say, I fell over laughing. Dumb bitches. Sorry if I don't have a male example.


Glides is done with his post.

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Response to Relationship Crew Sep. 25th, 2012 @ 11:56 PM Reply

At 9/25/12 06:36 PM, Glides wrote: Long distance simply doesn't compare to physically being with someone. I'm not even meaning it in a sexual way, it's literally better to be around that person and actually get to know them. So I would have to agree with you on that.

Huzzah, we agree :3

I forgot. Big whoop, wanna fight about it? (get the TV reference, get a cookie)

I getz no cookies D: ... but I shall fight for the death for it! >:3

And I'm 17 too, guess I shouldn't have assumed so much. :P

*posh accent* indeed kind sir.

Huzzah? I kinda knew that... It's just a justification for my actions really. Whether that is ethical or not is your pick. :P
I was merely saying that it's not just you who have a problem because of that, and you can be excused in that regard. So very ethical, yeah.

:3

That's depending on who you hung out with. In my case, opinions of me were so varied that I had no idea. Some people hated the very sight of me, others (read: freshman) worshiped me. That will cause confusion, and you seem to be going through something like that.

Hmmm... well for me all I have being receiving for the past year was positive things from people (other then a selective minority) so the fact is is that I am blessed in that regard in this new school. But i was the opposite in my old school, so essentially... yeah :\

Sounds good to me. I'll ask an actual woman about that ,since I thankfully know some.

Tell us, oh 007, a.k.a Bond (James Bond), your finds when you finish your death-defying, action-packed adventure! :P

b) Be lonely for a while until the women around you can make concise decisions
That may be never. My mother is one of the most irrational women I know, and I can assure you that she's older than me. For some, it never stops.

D:
That is horrid, but true. I look at my own mother, and I realize she too, despite being fairly old (fairly old XD) is still somewhat irrational (however believe or not, she has actually being with my dad for at least 20-27 years... so she's actually supposed to be one of those least irrational ones...) so essentially we will have to deal with this problem for eternity :(

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
c) Miraculously find someone whom isn't confused and have a fair-tail happy ever after *sarcasm*
If only, if only...if only that hot girl in English class was single! *sarcasm*

That... Xd
Believe it or not, there is a hot girl in my English class that isn't single at the moment... so wow your a goddamn psychic!

So yeah that was awesome of you to guess that correctly XD
Considering the other two, it's the most rational. We don't want to be alone, that's why most relationships begin.

That just opend my eyes a little more :O
Never knew that >_> ... (well, not consciously anyways)
:Women somehow think that if you don't rave about your boyfriend every second (when they're younger), it's going to end. Thus the annoying as hell Facebook posts. Ladies, we hate that shit. Quit.
This is quite true, I had this done to me in my first (and last) long-distance relationship... was nice at first, but then turned annoying quickly. Guess it's another thing we need to suck up >_>
:And the women are just as lonely as we are, thank God. Even the ones with options (99.9% of them)
Well, despite all the difference between the minds of males and females, we are all human beings after all (hopefully XD)

(kids in my school are idiots... planning dance partners for the next year... NARRR!!! D:<).
Strange, they never did that at my high school...

Well, they are dumb like that :P

Secrets are for sissies. Or something. I would have to blame general female confusion because of whatever for that incident. Still, though, I don't like her friends at all. There's a saying about people like them where I come from, and it involves a pickup truck and a football player's dick.

I have a hard time not believing that... But thankfully I have no idea what they are up to as I'm not in those sorts of circles.

Can anyone explain her reaction to me? Rather odd really...
Again, she's being irrational for the sake of being irrational. What's worse is if she's trying to take advice from teen magazines. I'll let this little tidbit here speak for itself.

If that is the case... here's my photo that'll explain itself :P

But those magazines at times have points... but the fact is it's advice that is supposed to only work for VERY specific situations that it would detract you from a more logical decision.

Women are shy because Twilight *cough hack wheeze* taught them to. Or something. If she ever asks you to whip her or handcuff her, run. Because she read 50 Shades of Terrible.

That Twilight part might be true *shrugs* but how on earth did BDSM enter this conversation?! :P
(and besides, how on earth do shy people connect with that sort of stuff? DX)

Not hurt, more like try and get her to want to be with you. Both genders do this all the time, or so I've seen. More chutzpah to you if you won't.

Hmmm... you might probably be right. But again, that is an option that is there but it's still something I don't like doing :\

I think it's a mix of 2 and 3... she might be weird due to something in her past (her friends hinted this is the reason why she was shy...) But I think it's approximately 60% 2 and 40% 3.
I will not guess.

Coolness?

For all we know, there are lesbian men out there.

Impossibro! (Unless they have a sex change! :O)

And that sounded so much like my friend that I was momentarily stunned.

Who knows? Maybe I am a secret friend of yours whom moved from your random country into Australia and never told you the horrible, horrible truth...

But I'm sure that's not the case >:P

At least around her. Around people you trust, care about, yadda yadda, be what you want. Essentially be the most confident self that you can be around her. She may not want to see all of "you" at once, but she does want to see it, eventually.

That makes perfect sense :3
Thanks and cheers.

I'll give you an example to better illustrate my point. Senior year, I'm talking with a group of girls, very hot (for all my kvetching I do talk to pretty people sometimes), and they're talking about one cheating with another guy. Right in the middle of the conversation, the dumb blonde of the group says "But does she love him?"
Needless to say, I fell over laughing. Dumb bitches. Sorry if I don't have a male example.

*PFFFFFFFFFFFFFFT* hahahahah
Oh you are most defiantly right to fall over laughing on that one. Nobody cheats on someone else and still love that person... what a moron XD. (What I think that dumb person was trying to say was "But is she still somewhat attracted to the guy she cheated?" that would have made a bit more sense I imagine... but still a stupid question XD)

Still you made you point... But still, this is what I have to say to that: :O


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Jeromia
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Response to Relationship Crew Sep. 26th, 2012 @ 12:05 AM Reply

On my previous point though where I said "Nobody cheats on someone else and still love that person... "

That may at times actually be true... sometimes people cheat on others to get back at them, but still love or are still attracted to them. But those situations only occur when their partners have wronged them to a ridiculously high bar.

It's still plausible, but not in the case you have illustrated earlier (haha)


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Response to Relationship Crew Sep. 28th, 2012 @ 12:05 PM Reply

At 9/23/12 01:01 PM, Jeromia wrote: So nothing happened other then me wishing, hoping and at times thinking along the lines of "don't do anything yet... your beneath her... she will just reject you" (yeah... that was my problem then) until about 2 months ago or so.

That's a problem right there. You haven't done anything, yet you believe that you will be rejected. Why should you believe that when you don't have any proof of it?

I understand that you have self-esteem issues, but that's something you need to work through in order to attract women and be in a relationship. I'll elaborate a bit on how to overcome these fears below.

Basically, the idea was this:
1. Tell people that I like her
2. Wait until she hears about it
3. Get a response from her so I can talk to her
I did this because I simply was too fearful, so I was hoping that this would at least show her that I am interested in her before trying anything.

There's a few problems with that plan. First of all, it avoids confrontation. That's bad because you won't be able to overcome your fear of speaking to people until you actually initiate conversation.
Another problem is that telling her that you like, either directly or indirectly, won't make her return the feelings.

Although she showed interest in me, (sending signals kinda stuff) I tried to approach her, but was unable to do so because I was too afraid (self-esteem issues, annoying pasts, you know the drill). This reduced my confidence a lot and made me believe that I should go back to my previous state and just not bother with any of it until I get everything else in my life sorted.

I can sympathize with this.

My first experience with a girl was very similar. In seventh grade, I had never had a conversation with a girl. I mean that in the literal sense. The most I had done was answer yes and no questions. I also had very few friends and no close friends, so I wasn't very skilled with conversation in general.

When I first felt feelings for a girl though, I realized that inevitably I had to talk to her. I had a similar plan that involved having someone else tell her that I liked her. After that, I was afraid to speak to her. So how did I overcome my fear? I just... spoke to her. After you've spoken to a girl a few times the anxiety lessens. Don't just talk to her, but talk to any girl that you want to talk to without caring whether they like you or not. You'll get used to it and it will eventually become natural. I still have, and will probably always have social anxiety. But now that I've gained some confidence it's easier to make the anxiety go away.

You shouldn't let situations like this reduce your confidence. After all, you didn't speak to her, so you didn't get rejected. Your only failure was in not trying.

Secondly, thanks to me opening up about my feelings, other girls have started to show more interest in me then before.

It sounds like you could take advantage of this and try engaging in conversation with some of these girls if you wanted to. Or if they truly are just annoying you can always just tell them lol.

I wonder whether I should just do the easier thing and go out with someone else (I am human you know... :\ )

You have to think about what you want. Would you truly be happy with your second choice, the relationship that you didn't want but took out of convenience?

For me, the answer was no, so I drove myself to reach my goal and end up with someone that I truly wanted to be with. If you decide that your content with someone else though, there's nothing wrong with that. Just consider the other person's feelings as well. Would you want to be someone's second choice? In other words, your feelings should still be genuine. If someone is easier for you to get with then that's fine, but you still need to be genuinely attracted to them as well.

The third problem, and this is the worse in my opinion. The involvement of her friends has spiraled out of control. They were first really interested in this (as they thought it was cute) and encouraged me to talk to her and still do. However, although i don't know what sort of dramas is going on, I have a feeling that me telling everyone about my feelings made a mess.

To be honest, letting your feelings become public was not a very good idea. I don't think that you should apologize or focus on what other people think though. Why would you apologize for letting your feelings out anyways? If you need space from her friends though, let them know. Tell them (gently) that their involvement isn't welcome. After all, this is really just between you and the girl, isn't it?

Thankfully, I am on a holiday and my plan is to just enjoy my days relaxing and not bothering with anything but my music, video games, some tv shows, Taekwondo and basically having fun whilst improving me as a person.

That's good.

But there are some questions that I really need answers for here:
1. What could she be feeling that is making her avoid me? Is it because of my actions, or is it because of some other personal reason?

It could be that she's shy. It could also be because you let her know your feelings for her. Now that she knows, she feels pressure from her friends and you to return the feelings. This is obvious because her friends have been pressuring you to speak to her. She can't though, at least not yet, because she doesn't know you as a person.

2a) Tell her my number/ask for hers and text her... Hopefully get a conversation going and ease some of the tension between us.

I would go with this plan.

From what you've said I'm guessing that you haven't spoken to her yet (correct me if I'm wrong).
I would simply walk up and introduce yourself. Ask her about herself and let her get to know you. Don't care about impressing her, just try to have fun. Giving her your phone number wouldn't be a bad idea either.

2b) Tell her in person my worries.

Don't. I think I elaborated enough above. You'd simply be dumping your problems onto her, which will ultimately drive her away.

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Response to Relationship Crew Sep. 28th, 2012 @ 12:26 PM Reply

At 9/24/12 07:12 PM, Glides wrote: I would love to take this opportunity to call her a bitch, but I'm not sure.

Of course you would. I can tell because the rest of your post reflects your hatred of women.

And let's face it, the prettier a girl is, the bitchier she is likely to be. Sorry ladies.
They don't tell you that the game of romance is a dirty and backstabbing one. Trust me, people get hurt, lots.
Several possibilities. One, she's a bitch, and she's trying to make you suffer.
Sadly, girls her age can't stand emotion of any kind from dudes.

Glides, why do you post here if you're going to give excessively negative advice? This may be how you view the world, but I can tell you that it's not representative of reality and doesn't help anyone. While you may think that you're being realistic and cynical I can see that most of what you say stems from your own negative feelings towards your experiences with girls.

I'll admit that most of my advice is a transcript of what I think that Vincoid would say. That said, I also make an effort to make my advice as objective and logical as possible, and to lean and understand exactly what it means and apply it in real life. If you don't want to do that then fine, but don't try and drag other people down with you.

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Response to Relationship Crew Sep. 28th, 2012 @ 11:51 PM Reply

At 9/28/12 12:26 PM, Entice wrote: a whole lot of good advice

Hmmm... Yeah you are right about your points. Thanks for that though, you gave me a bit more direction then the one I already had hah.

Anyhow, I'll update you guys if it works out or not. Either way, no matter how it goes, I'm glad I came here for advice as now I know what to do when it comes to things like this.

Thanks.

P.S: Well you were kinda right about another thing... we were acting kinda stupidly back there... <_<


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Response to Relationship Crew Sep. 29th, 2012 @ 08:15 AM Reply

So I have my first ever date today with a girl from college who I really like. She's got a fantastic personality and her sense of humor is very similar to mine so it's hard not to be so attracted to her. And he's cute as all hell too so that helps.

I'll report back later, but for now I have to make myself smell delightful and sexy.

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Response to Relationship Crew Oct. 6th, 2012 @ 12:13 AM Reply

At 9/29/12 08:15 AM, Snuff wrote: So I have my first ever date today with a girl from college who I really like. She's got a fantastic personality and her sense of humor is very similar to mine so it's hard not to be so attracted to her. And he's cute as all hell too so that helps.

Lucky bastard. I just got stood up.


I'll report back later, but for now I have to make myself smell delightful and sexy.

Smelling delightful is sexy, and smelling sexy is delightful.


Glides is done with his post.

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Response to Relationship Crew Oct. 7th, 2012 @ 03:06 PM Reply

At 9/23/12 01:01 PM, Jeromia wrote: But there are some questions that I really need answers for here:
1. What could she be feeling that is making her avoid me? Is it because of my actions, or is it because of some other personal reason? (I was told that she was shy and that's why she is avoiding me, but I don't know... I doubt it has to do with me not being attractive... as I am I think :\)
2. How pushy should I be about this? What should I do? I have several ideas and here they are:
2a) Tell her my number/ask for hers and text her... Hopefully get a conversation going and ease some of the tension between us.
2b) Tell her in person my worries.
3. Is there something I'm missing here? Just want to know if I am.

You're not in love. You are infatuated with her. Love may come later but it is not the initial attraction.

1. She's shy and you have made no romantic move even though you claimed to have feelings for her.
2. Walk up to her, tell her you like her, say something like "I like you, I think we should date". And see her response. Done.
3. You're missing that you need to make a damn move already and quit pussyfooting around or you'll regret missing out.

At 9/24/12 07:12 PM, Glides wrote: I would love to take this opportunity to call her a bitch, but I'm not sure. This has happened also to me, and although any chance of anything romantic died out once I did that (different girl), we became friends. Then again, she MAY be a bitch, you said nothing about her personality. And let's face it, the prettier a girl is, the bitchier she is likely to be. Sorry ladies.

You try getting hit on all the time by a whole bunch of guys that just want in your pants and see how pleasant you'd be.

I agree with Entice too. His advice is good. Glides is very woman-bashing and weird.


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Response to Relationship Crew Oct. 7th, 2012 @ 05:52 PM Reply

At 10/7/12 05:41 PM, TheCrimsonWidow wrote: What do I do? Do I just let it be and go out with him when he calls?

It seems like both of you have developed attraction for each other. If he calls you and asks you to go out or something, I would agree to it and use it as an opportunity to get to know him better. You two may end up hitting it off. :)


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Response to Relationship Crew Oct. 7th, 2012 @ 06:10 PM Reply

At 10/7/12 05:59 PM, TheCrimsonWidow wrote:
At 10/7/12 05:52 PM, DarkSoldier wrote: It seems like both of you have developed attraction for each other. If he calls you and asks you to go out or something, I would agree to it and use it as an opportunity to get to know him better. You two may end up hitting it off. :)
I guess, I just hope he doesn't turn into a prick once I date him, thats happened before.

I wouldn't treat it as a date but rather as a friendly meet up. And that's the point of a meet up; to get to know him to see how he is like.


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Response to Relationship Crew Oct. 8th, 2012 @ 01:19 PM Reply

Okay so my little date went pretty well and we had a great time. But now we're back at college and I've definitely got competition from this other guy. I can feel it, and it's horrible. Competition for a girl is one of the most awful things ever, especially when I really dislike the guy anyway, and so does pretty much everyone else on my college course except for the girl, Alice, who I really like.

While we were talking today (competition was also there), she mentioned that she can't take hints at all and if you want to tell her something you should just tell her, which I'm not sure if that was a hint or not, so yeah. I plan on telling her I like her soon, I pussied out actually talking to her at the end of the day today, so I think I might do it on Facebook in a bit.

I'm a little worried about it being awkward at college but usually it's okay, the one thing I'm worried most about is whether or not she'll tell me she likes me back or will do something else and it's sort of putting me off. I know I should do it because otherwise I wont know, and I might miss my chance if the competition I has decides to make a move.

I hate being rushed into things but hopefully it all turns out well.

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Response to Relationship Crew Oct. 8th, 2012 @ 02:09 PM Reply

At 10/8/12 01:19 PM, Snuff wrote: I'm a little worried about it being awkward at college but usually it's okay, the one thing I'm worried most about is whether or not she'll tell me she likes me back or will do something else and it's sort of putting me off. I know I should do it because otherwise I wont know, and I might miss my chance if the competition I has decides to make a move.

I hate being rushed into things but hopefully it all turns out well.

Stop worrying.

I advise against you telling her you like her. Girls know when you like them; you do not need to spell it out for them. I would also advise against using facebook, texting or other social mediums to communicate except for phone calls. Get out of your comfort zone and use the phone. I promise, it does not bite. ;-)

You will know if she likes you based on if she makes time for you. That means if you make plans with her and she does not put you off. Use those meetups as opportunities to get more intimate.

Final word of advice, if you are feeling the need to rush then that is an indication that you are investing too much time into her and that will be your defeat. Women like men who do their own thing. Your life should not revolve around her.

Cheers.


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Response to Relationship Crew Oct. 8th, 2012 @ 05:48 PM Reply

At 10/8/12 02:09 PM, DarkSoldier wrote:
Stop worrying.

I didn't read this and told her I liked her and she doesn't like me back so now college is going to suck and I feel like shit.

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Response to Relationship Crew Oct. 8th, 2012 @ 10:28 PM Reply

At 10/8/12 05:48 PM, Snuff wrote:
At 10/8/12 02:09 PM, DarkSoldier wrote:
Stop worrying.
I didn't read this and told her I liked her and she doesn't like me back so now college is going to suck and I feel like shit.

College is filled with women. Move along.


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Response to Relationship Crew Oct. 9th, 2012 @ 05:51 AM Reply

*sigh* I've decided I had enough so I'm pulling out. But thanks for all the good advice... At least I'm gaining more knowledge in this sort of stuff (and therefore can have a better chance of handling it better next time).


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Response to Relationship Crew Oct. 17th, 2012 @ 07:32 PM Reply

So I'm thinking of contacting a girl. The problem is that I dated her for a couple of weeks and got broken up with. The reason she gave was that she didn't feel ready for a relationship but I'm certain now that a big part of it was how I was acted... calling her everyday and stuff. It was my first serious relationship. During the breakup I acted desperate and clingy (I tried to talk her into staying with me) and now she won't speak to me. I tried texting her about a month after it happened and I just got one word replies. It's been five or six now and I want to contact her again. Dating's probably not a good idea until way later but I want to fix things and be on speaking terms at least. The problem is that we're out of school now so I can't just walk up to her casually and talk to her. I think that if I contact her by phone now and try to arrange a meeting she'll think that I'm still trying to convince her to get back into a relationship so she'll just ignore it. I don't even know how I'm supposed to initiate contact with her.

I wish I could go back in time and meet her again... that'd be perfect. Anyways how do I get back with someone after I've fucked up the relationship?

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Response to Relationship Crew Oct. 17th, 2012 @ 08:17 PM Reply

At 10/17/12 07:32 PM, Entice wrote: I wish I could go back in time and meet her again... that'd be perfect. Anyways how do I get back with someone after I've fucked up the relationship?

Her telling you she was not ready for a relationship was the easy way of telling you she was no longer interested in you. Clingyness definitely contributed to her decision. I advise against contacting her again because otherwise that will show that you are still clinging to her. Let her initiate the contact. What should you do? Go "No Contact", continue your life and meet new people (including women!).

If she is interested in you again, she will contact you.


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