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Vincoid
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Response to Relationship Crew Mar. 24th, 2008 @ 01:07 PM Reply

At 3/24/08 12:37 PM, Black-Lightning wrote: I keep getting messages on myspace from Ember saying "No one cares what you have to say" so why does she read my bulletins?

How many posts will it take for you to finally realize that she too hasn't moved on yet?
I believe it has been said at least a dozen times so far. She's dealing with conflicting emotions which make her act negative in one situation but positive in the other.


"Never was anything great achieved without danger." - Niccolo Machiavelli

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Response to Relationship Crew Mar. 24th, 2008 @ 01:13 PM Reply

At 3/24/08 01:07 PM, Vincoid wrote: How many posts will it take for you to finally realize that she too hasn't moved on yet?
I believe it has been said at least a dozen times so far. She's dealing with conflicting emotions which make her act negative in one situation but positive in the other.

I don't fucking get it. If she isn't over me, then why break up with me in the first place?
Girls are far too confusing... fuck.
Oh well... I need someone to pluck my eyebrows =[

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Response to Relationship Crew Mar. 24th, 2008 @ 01:14 PM Reply

At 3/24/08 02:27 AM, JackBonneham wrote: I've been through breakups, and a month is enough

How long were the relationships, though? I heard somewhere (can't remember where it was, which deducts from its credibility I suppose) that in most cases, the time to move on from a relationship generally lasts about a third of the length of the relationship itself.

For me, I find it's often slightly less than that, but if, hypothetically, we were to take the above theory as true, then perhaps B-L would be a 'typical case' of that theory. A year-long relationship would translate to a moving-on period of approximately 4 months in this instance.

Still, I've been in relationships that have lasted the same length of time (and longer), and it's never really taken me more that about 2 months to move on. Depends on the person, I guess.


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Response to Relationship Crew Mar. 24th, 2008 @ 01:16 PM Reply

At 3/24/08 01:13 PM, Black-Lightning wrote: I don't fucking get it. If she isn't over me, then why break up with me in the first place?

She probably realizes that it's not going to work out, hence why she's trying to move on. It's pretty simple. You can still have feelings for someone AND know that the relationship wouldn't work out.

Sorry for double post.

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Response to Relationship Crew Mar. 24th, 2008 @ 01:26 PM Reply

At 3/24/08 12:37 PM, Black-Lightning wrote: I keep getting messages on myspace from Ember saying "No one cares what you have to say" so why does she read my bulletins?

Cause she's still uber-pissed at you, and you still still haven't fixed that. Quit complaining and just fix it. Say you're sorry and don't be such a bastard this time. Quit acting like you didn't do anything to deserve her treatment, because you did. From what I've seen you've been a bastard every time you talk to her, and you just make her hate you more.

Just apologize for everything you've done and end it. Don't blame her for anything. She knows what she's done and who's fault it is, and she doesn't need you to tell her. Don't even hint that something's her fault. Plenty of things are her fault, but this is apologizing time, not blaming time. In a few weeks you'll be talking together this whole thing, and maybe you can do a little blaming then, but right now you just need to apologize for all the stupid shit you did and she'll stop.

And quit looking for excuses like insomnia. You're having sleep problems because of her, but you don't do anything. You just take all your problems and bitch, and then you go "Lots of people are depressed two months after a break up, so it's alright if I stay depressed more." Well it's not fucking alright. Get your head straight and find something else to make you happy. There's about a million different things you could do, and a good number of those you'd enjoy a lot more than moping around being a little bitch.

Don't drink or smoke for at least two weeks. That'll just bring you right back to where you are right now. Just look for something new and really fun to do and enjoy it. Don't worry, you won't forget about her. You'll just think of what's happened in a more positive light.

And don't live in the past or you'll never do something with your life. Instead of fixing your life when it goes bad, you'll just think about the good times and leave the bad as they are. Don't forget all the fun you had together, but realize that it's over. That part of your life is over, and now it's time to start the next part.

How long's it been since you've helped someone here? You used to help people all the time, and now you just complain about your problems. If you fix yourself, you'll probably be fixing other people's problems shortly after, and that'd make you feel even better.

Why not take a short vacation this weekend or next to just get away from things. Find something you'd really like to do and just go do it. I think you'll feel a LOT better afterwards. Of course do this after apologizing. :)


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Response to Relationship Crew Mar. 24th, 2008 @ 01:42 PM Reply

At 3/24/08 01:26 PM, CoryLehan wrote: Cause she's still uber-pissed at you, and you still still haven't fixed that. Quit complaining and just fix it. Say you're sorry and don't be such a bastard this time. Quit acting like you didn't do anything to deserve her treatment, because you did. From what I've seen you've been a bastard every time you talk to her, and you just make her hate you more.

Thought your 'solution' is more appealing to me, it's not this simple with her. She's thriving off our break up. It makes people notice her and from what I hear, I guess a lot of guys are doing their thing to get with her. I guess she wants to explore.

Just apologize for everything you've done and end it. Don't blame her for anything. She knows what she's done and who's fault it is, and she doesn't need you to tell her. Don't even hint that something's her fault. Plenty of things are her fault, but this is apologizing time, not blaming time. In a few weeks you'll be talking together this whole thing, and maybe you can do a little blaming then, but right now you just need to apologize for all the stupid shit you did and she'll stop.

I just did, but I don't think it'll work.

And quit looking for excuses like insomnia. You're having sleep problems because of her, but you don't do anything. You just take all your problems and bitch, and then you go "Lots of people are depressed two months after a break up, so it's alright if I stay depressed more." Well it's not fucking alright. Get your head straight and find something else to make you happy. There's about a million different things you could do, and a good number of those you'd enjoy a lot more than moping around being a little bitch.

I've had it for a while, man. Before I even dated Ember.

Don't drink or smoke for at least two weeks. That'll just bring you right back to where you are right now. Just look for something new and really fun to do and enjoy it. Don't worry, you won't forget about her. You'll just think of what's happened in a more positive light.

I quit cuz I'm in drama. We get tested for extra curricular shit.

And don't live in the past or you'll never do something with your life. Instead of fixing your life when it goes bad, you'll just think about the good times and leave the bad as they are. Don't forget all the fun you had together, but realize that it's over. That part of your life is over, and now it's time to start the next part.

I can't help what I dream about though...

How long's it been since you've helped someone here? You used to help people all the time, and now you just complain about your problems. If you fix yourself, you'll probably be fixing other people's problems shortly after, and that'd make you feel even better.

It's been a while. I don't even remember the last person I helped, lol.

Why not take a short vacation this weekend or next to just get away from things. Find something you'd really like to do and just go do it. I think you'll feel a LOT better afterwards. Of course do this after apologizing. :)

I'm supposed to go to the movies with Kiesha tonight. Hopefully it'll be a good time.

Message from Ember:
Josh I don't like people who are dicks to me just to be funny
I don't like people who think that couples are going to last forever
I'm in the ninth grade
you always think you're so damn mature and you're not
I'm being mature about this you're not
What mature person gets mad and sends out a bunch of bulletins about it?
You're right the only person you have to blame is yourself
Learn how to handle a relationship
Be gracious when it's over too
I don't want a relationship
I just want to have fun for now

Some of it is blown out of proportion and a lot of the stuff she is saying, is a total contradiction of what she told me about a month ago.

Vincoid
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Response to Relationship Crew Mar. 24th, 2008 @ 02:24 PM Reply

At 3/24/08 01:42 PM, Black-Lightning wrote: Some of it is blown out of proportion and a lot of the stuff she is saying, is a total contradiction of what she told me about a month ago.

So what? This is not a game of tennis where you keep hitting the ball, which in this cse could be seen as the one who's to be blamed, back and forth. You have to pick up the ball, accept that you've done things wrong, and quit the fucking game. Don't try to make her accept that she did things wrong too, because she won't. You know why? Because she's a woman, that's why.
The only thing that's left now is a fight over who's the immature one. Which is, quite ironically, immature.

And seriously, a month? Women can change over the course of 5 minutes and you're surprised when she says something differently a month later?

And I agree, women are confusing and hard to understand, but they don't have to be. You can learn about how they think. Though you have to let go of logic. Don't try to rationalize her actions by using logic, because her actions are always driven by emotions, which can change anytime for no apparent reason.


"Never was anything great achieved without danger." - Niccolo Machiavelli

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Response to Relationship Crew Mar. 24th, 2008 @ 04:28 PM Reply

Hullor thar.
Anyone got any good places to take a girlfriend or good activities to do (preferably with a minimal drain on the contents of my wallet)? Something fun to keep stuff exciting.
Already done cinema and beach and going for a coffee and eachothers houses just wondering if there's anything else good.


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CTM222
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Response to Relationship Crew Mar. 24th, 2008 @ 07:03 PM Reply

At 3/24/08 04:28 PM, elkrobber wrote: Hullor thar.
Anyone got any good places to take a girlfriend or good activities to do (preferably with a minimal drain on the contents of my wallet)? Something fun to keep stuff exciting.
Already done cinema and beach and going for a coffee and eachothers houses just wondering if there's anything else good.

As I have mentioned many many times.

Ice skating is great. And a personal favourite of mine.
Its fun and active. Good for having a laugh.
Yet romantic, great excuse for holding hands.


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Response to Relationship Crew Mar. 24th, 2008 @ 07:11 PM Reply

I'm fake everyone. Because I'm talking to girl that I used to flat out hate. My hatred has been lifted and such. But I guess since I'm talking to them and being nice, that's not me and Ember thinks I'm fake. YAY =[
I texted her and told her sorry about shit and tried to talk about shit, but she wanted no part of it, so I just let it go and played the sims =]

From now on, I'm gonna try and help people =]
I wanna be a psychologist or possibly a teacher.

Swordstick76
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Response to Relationship Crew Mar. 24th, 2008 @ 09:11 PM Reply

At 3/24/08 07:11 PM, Black-Lightning wrote: I'm fake everyone. Because I'm talking to girl that I used to flat out hate. My hatred has been lifted and such. But I guess since I'm talking to them and being nice, that's not me and Ember thinks I'm fake. YAY =[

Don't get angry, don't let her affect you. She's just a silly, petty girl. Let it be, ignorance is the best weapon in a man's arsonal.

I texted her and told her sorry about shit and tried to talk about shit, but she wanted no part of it, so I just let it go and played the sims =]

Good. If she refuses to meet you, then don't bother to meet her. If she's being a bitch, just ignore. You will be amazed just how it helps. Don't sting, don't be a thorn, don't hurt her. If she tries to hurt you, ignore. Otherwise, leave her alone. Hands off kinda thing.


From now on, I'm gonna try and help people =]
I wanna be a psychologist or possibly a teacher.

This is a step in the right direction. Look forward, not back. And helping people gives life a happy reward...

Ice skating is great. And a personal favourite of mine.
Its fun and active. Good for having a laugh.
Yet romantic, great excuse for holding hands.

What if you don't ice skate? I don't know how, and from what i hear i'm missing everything!! (goes into a corner and cries self to sleep)

Black-Lightning
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Response to Relationship Crew Mar. 24th, 2008 @ 09:44 PM Reply

At 3/24/08 09:11 PM, Swordstick76 wrote: What if you don't ice skate? I don't know how, and from what i hear i'm missing everything!! (goes into a corner and cries self to sleep)

I suggest you go and learn. I started when I was about 7 and it took me about 4 times to learn to let go of the wall. Be super adventurous your 3rd time going. It's super fun =]
I started playing manhunt and the game pisses me off =]
Some girl wants me to come over and 'wrestle naked' soon... so... yay me?

CTM222
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Response to Relationship Crew Mar. 25th, 2008 @ 08:30 AM Reply

At 3/24/08 09:11 PM, Swordstick76 wrote: What if you don't ice skate? I don't know how, and from what i hear i'm missing everything!! (goes into a corner and cries self to sleep)

Now, now. It's not hard to learn like B-L said.
Just go once or twice and you will get it. You dont have to go that often, you wont forget how to do it once you get it.


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Response to Relationship Crew Mar. 25th, 2008 @ 09:54 AM Reply

hum. I'll look into going a couple of times... Or i could just go with a chick and ask her to "teach" me ;)

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Response to Relationship Crew Mar. 25th, 2008 @ 09:57 AM Reply

At 3/25/08 09:54 AM, Swordstick76 wrote: hum. I'll look into going a couple of times... Or i could just go with a chick and ask her to "teach" me ;)

Haha! Good plan.


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Response to Relationship Crew Mar. 25th, 2008 @ 01:45 PM Reply

At 3/24/08 07:03 PM, CTM222 wrote:
At 3/24/08 04:28 PM, elkrobber wrote: Hullor thar.
Anyone got any good places to take a girlfriend or good activities to do (preferably with a minimal drain on the contents of my wallet)? Something fun to keep stuff exciting.
Already done cinema and beach and going for a coffee and eachothers houses just wondering if there's anything else good.
As I have mentioned many many times.

Ice skating is great. And a personal favourite of mine.
Its fun and active. Good for having a laugh.
Yet romantic, great excuse for holding hands.

Yeah, that would be great. My town is, however, devoid of ice rinks and frozen bodies of water ('tis by the sea). The nearest place to go is london, and that is a £20 train journey away. It isnt really viable as an activity.


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Response to Relationship Crew Mar. 25th, 2008 @ 02:16 PM Reply

At 3/25/08 01:45 PM, elkrobber wrote: Yeah, that would be great. My town is, however, devoid of ice rinks and frozen bodies of water ('tis by the sea). The nearest place to go is london, and that is a £20 train journey away. It isnt really viable as an activity.

Theres no ice skating rink in Brighton?? Thats quite suprising! Still, theres plenty of other stuff to do there!


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Response to Relationship Crew Mar. 25th, 2008 @ 06:29 PM Reply

At 3/25/08 02:16 PM, CTM222 wrote:
At 3/25/08 01:45 PM, elkrobber wrote: Yeah, that would be great. My town is, however, devoid of ice rinks and frozen bodies of water ('tis by the sea). The nearest place to go is london, and that is a £20 train journey away. It isnt really viable as an activity.
Theres no ice skating rink in Brighton?? Thats quite suprising! Still, theres plenty of other stuff to do there!

Being a seaside resort, it doesnt attract many tourists in winter, which is when people generally want to go ice skating. I can see why nobody has bothered really.
There's surprisingly little to do in brighton, especially with a girl who has lived there all her life =P


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Response to Relationship Crew Mar. 25th, 2008 @ 06:56 PM Reply

At 3/25/08 06:29 PM, elkrobber wrote: Being a seaside resort, it doesnt attract many tourists in winter, which is when people generally want to go ice skating. I can see why nobody has bothered really.
There's surprisingly little to do in brighton, especially with a girl who has lived there all her life =P

True, what attracts tourists isnt going to be as fun to people who have spent their lives there. For me however, it would seem like theres loads to do there. Rides, arcades the beach itself..


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Response to Relationship Crew Mar. 25th, 2008 @ 10:05 PM Reply

At 3/24/08 09:44 PM, Black-Lightning wrote:
At 3/24/08 09:11 PM, Swordstick76 wrote: What if you don't ice skate? I don't know how, and from what i hear i'm missing everything!! (goes into a corner and cries self to sleep)
I started playing manhunt and the game pisses me off =]

MANHUNT!!!!!!!!!!! good for you to take my advice and play the game! >=)


"The heart has its reasons which reason knows not of." --Blaise Pascal
Relationship crew. Go there. Do it. Now.
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q13qew
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Response to Relationship Crew Mar. 26th, 2008 @ 05:21 AM Reply

At 10/2/04 02:51 AM, QuikFox wrote: Ummm, dude. Just because you made a spelling error in the last one doesn't mean that you should go and make another thread about it. That is just really annoying.

Agree it sucks and its dump

Black-Lightning
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Response to Relationship Crew Mar. 26th, 2008 @ 02:49 PM Reply

I started talking to my ex nicely. We're friends for now...
I like Manhunt. I love senseless violence.

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Response to Relationship Crew Mar. 26th, 2008 @ 04:21 PM Reply

Its my birthday today. I demand wimminz.


All that is necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to stand by and do nothing.

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Response to Relationship Crew Mar. 26th, 2008 @ 04:24 PM Reply

At 3/26/08 04:21 PM, PhoenixTails wrote: Its my birthday today. I demand wimminz.

lol!
keep that up and you'll get swarms :P


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Response to Relationship Crew Mar. 26th, 2008 @ 06:41 PM Reply

At 3/26/08 05:21 AM, q13qew wrote:
At 10/2/04 02:51 AM, QuikFox wrote: Ummm, dude. Just because you made a spelling error in the last one doesn't mean that you should go and make another thread about it. That is just really annoying.
Agree it sucks and its dump

you are approximately... 134 pages late.


"The heart has its reasons which reason knows not of." --Blaise Pascal
Relationship crew. Go there. Do it. Now.
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dan00012
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Response to Relationship Crew Mar. 26th, 2008 @ 07:08 PM Reply

yay im finally back

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Response to Relationship Crew Mar. 26th, 2008 @ 07:12 PM Reply

At 3/26/08 07:08 PM, dan00012 wrote: yay im finally back

where'd you go?


"The heart has its reasons which reason knows not of." --Blaise Pascal
Relationship crew. Go there. Do it. Now.
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CTM222
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Response to Relationship Crew Mar. 26th, 2008 @ 07:39 PM Reply

At 3/26/08 04:21 PM, PhoenixTails wrote: Its my birthday today. I demand wimminz.

Happy Birthday!!!

I know, I know, I forgot to say it last post... duh

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Response to Relationship Crew Mar. 26th, 2008 @ 07:54 PM Reply

So I was hanging out with a friend of mine and I guess Ember was kinda jealous about it... I'm kinda confused about if she wants to get back together. Just the other day, we talked on the phone for over an hour, then texted almost all day the next. I'm confused on her intentions, so I'm slowly advancing forward, but I won't let my guard down. I got mad at her the other day for trying to make me jealous. It kinda pissed me off... I was in an angry state and felt like snapping necks... I just went to bed and I was fine =]

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Response to Relationship Crew Mar. 26th, 2008 @ 08:04 PM Reply

At 3/26/08 07:54 PM, Black-Lightning wrote: So I was hanging out with a friend of mine and I guess Ember was kinda jealous about it... I'm kinda confused about if she wants to get back together. Just the other day, we talked on the phone for over an hour, then texted almost all day the next. I'm confused on her intentions, so I'm slowly advancing forward, but I won't let my guard down. I got mad at her the other day for trying to make me jealous. It kinda pissed me off... I was in an angry state and felt like snapping necks... I just went to bed and I was fine =]

Snapping necks, you say?

Anyway, i suggest letting her make the move on you, to be on the safe side. Meet her halfway.


"The heart has its reasons which reason knows not of." --Blaise Pascal
Relationship crew. Go there. Do it. Now.
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