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funny story [wip]

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funny story [wip] 2017-02-25 08:22:02


Bobby Robby Robinson is just your ordinary person that people feel weird around. Sitting at his usual table in Taco Bell, he leans over and inspects his food. You would not guess that he was tall since he was hunched over. He hunches because he is insecure about his long pointy nose. Another reason people give him the look is because he is missing an ear. He cut it off so he could be like Van Gough. He regrets it every day. That poor old Bobby Robby Robinson.
Horse burrito with a Chuck Norris action figure was always his favorite even though he’s thirty-five. He’s eating alone there once again as he does every day of his sad, weird, worthless, despicable, rotten, almost dead life. He hears a yell from the other room which sounded like Amy Whinehouse. Just then, a big, hairy, tall, stinky man walked out of the bathroom after cleaning it. The man goes up to Bobby Robby Robinson and slams his left hand onto the table. The man yells, “This that bull bull. I’m done with this job. They need to get someone else to get it.”
The man runs out with his hands on his hips. Bobby Robby Robinson goes up to the counter and asks what that was about. The manager’s eyes pierced Bobby’s heart. He replies, “We asked him to get the secret sauce, but he was tired of this ‘bull bull’ ever since Jack slapped him with a ham yesterday.”
Bobby looked puzzled, dazed and kinda hungry for more burritos. Bobby yelled, “Shut up and give me my mexican stuff!” The manager replied, “No wait! The author needs a plot!” Bobby folded his arms, gave his sassy black woman face, and his stomach grumbled by the power of Taco Bell. He then asks, “What do you want? I need to get back to loitering and ruining your bathroom walls.” The manager says, “I need you to go to a Hawaiian volcano and get our sauce from it.” Bobby was hesitant. “What’s in it for me?” He asked. “ISIS will die, cancer will be cured, and nobody will ever murder anyone again.” The manager replied, but Bobby didn’t give a rat tooth. The manager then said, “You can half the sauce for yourself.” Bobby leaped in joy and started singing Rick Astley’s ‘Never Gonna Give You Up.’ Everyone was annoyed by it and so Jesus himself came in, gave Bobby a wedgie, and kicks him out the door. A talking dog named Dale joins him.