4 Years? 4 years? 4 Years ago? It couldn'tve been that long already..
RIP Adam. I've found myself saying "This will be in dedication to you" when making Flash just for the love of making Flash. Didn't matter what it was. You were inspiring. An inspiring drunk artist plagued by disease. How I would've loved to have your feces smeared over my cock and drown you in my semen so much you cough up blood and your next Flash animation. I can still remember the last time we spoke, I was a depressed 14 year old and I asked you..I asked you a good way to kill yourself, and you wrote 3 sentences throwing out idea's. I laughed and said "It sounds like you've been thinking of killing me for awhile" and then you told me you've been thinking about killing yourself for awhile, which I just thought was normal depression everyone goes through, but you really went through it, and 4 years later I feel you inside of me (HARD OOHH BABY) and I don't animate anymore, as you know, but whenever I'm feeling bored and drunk, I take out my pen and start writing away about murder, gore, sex, and reuniting with the Jake I used to be, the Jake I had a lot of being fun being.
If anything, my brief experience (however impersonal it was) with you taught me to express my emotions however they felt, that it's okay to dream and fantasize about slashing fictional characters up - anything to satisfy our hunger for the anti-mundane, using our feelings and emotions in any way possible, no matter the consequences or how we're seen by the "general public" eye, and just having the most fun we could have with ourselves, excited and joyous about experiencing with other people, as you used to be when you started the LCClub or one of your AP collaborations.
Your death taught me what a sorrowed and pained heart can do for the world, how sadness strikes from the loss of a life, whoever it is, whenever it is, as a distant stranger or good friend.
RIP Adam. I'll dedicate one of my novels in your memory. It'll be just the type of novel you'd love.
<3
