Describe Your Parents Relationship

[AbsurdRandomness]

Mine goes like this.

HIM: "I don't love you anymore."
pause
HER: "How long have you felt like that."
HIM: "A while. I've been miserable with you for years now."
HER: "Thank you for finally saying it, I've been miserable too."
HIM: "What?"
HER: "I've thought about killing you in your sleep."
HIM: "That's lovely, I've dreamt about you dying in a car accident and everyone feeling sorry for me and pretending to cry at your funeral while I secretly felt happy to be rid of you."
HER: "Funny how that happens. I actually held my pocket knife to your throat when you kept me up snoring once. Just knowing that I could end your life and my misery at any moment was enough to keep me going."
he laughs
she laughs
HIM: "I would wake up feeling guilty for a while, but then the guilt would melt away into self-pity that it was only a dream."
HER: "I've been too unhappy with you for too many years to feel guilty over all the thoughts of murdering you."
pause
HIM: "So should we get a divorce then?"
HER: "I guess, or just stay together for about 5 more years. For the kids sake."
HIM: "Fuck the kids, I hate you so much that 5 more years sharing my life with you might lead me to suicide."
HER: "Don't worry, I'd probably go through with murdering you long before that."
HIM: "You really think about killing me that much?"
HER: "Do you dream about me dying often?"
HIM: "Most nights."
HER: "I was thinking about how amazing it would be to kill you just before you started this conversation."
HIM: "That's dedicated hatred right there."
HER: "Thank you."
HIM: "You're welcome."
pause
HIM: "So should we sleep on the same bed tonight?"
HER: "Much as I'd love to finally get a full night's sleep without your fat repugnant body drooping over my shoulder... I guess we should."
HIM: "Fuck."
HER: "I agree."
HIM: "Well goodnight then."
HER: "Night."
lights off

[MykeiXWolfe]

THEY'RE BOTH DEAD.

[MykeiXWolfe]

just kiddin', they're divaursed.

[FoAngel]

HIM:.......
HER: Even though your father was a cunt i wish he was still alive

Cheers mum

[BrentHeMan]

At 3/26/15 12:46 AM, FoAngel wrote: HIM:.......
HER: Even though your father was a cunt i wish he was still alive

Cheers mum

Awww, shucks. My parents are cunts too, but I prefer them alive also (they are).

[Sword-of-Kings]

They argue all the fucking time and seem to hate each other, and yet they are still married. I kind of wish they would get a divorce because it's fucking horrible hearing them yell at each other all the time.

[Viper]

Been divorced for awhile now. So you can sorta figure it out for yourself.

[ZJ]

I always assumed that one of the requirements for having an NG account was having divorced parents.

[Goreguese]

my parents were not married but they're still together until now. i guess they're just doing fine for the sake of the children :)

[ThePulp]

'Nulled long ago.

[someaveragechap]

HIM: (taking a dirt nap)
HER: I wish he went to more church.

[Zombified]

My father is a hard working man, and my mother is awesome. Bet you didn't see that shit coming.

[RB]

They go pretty well with each other.

[RB]

They go pretty well with each other.

[RandyRandom]

At 3/26/15 12:44 AM, MykeiXWolfe wrote: just kiddin', they're divaursed.

Same here, brother, sir.

[BanditWoolyBear]

Still together

Why do I have an NG account then

It's been a fun week and a half guys,

But the rules are there in black and white

[DoctorStrongbad]

Parents always yell and hardly ever hang out together. Oh well.

[DamnedByFate]

At 3/26/15 01:16 AM, Sword-of-Kings wrote: They argue all the fucking time and seem to hate each other, and yet they are still married. I kind of wish they would get a divorce because it's fucking horrible hearing them yell at each other all the time.

Whoa, I had no idea you were my sister.

[Teddiinas]

Even if I wanted to, I wouldn't describe my parents relationship. If I was a parent, I wouldn't want my kids talking about my failing marriage on internet forums

[Jester]

They've got nothing in common and don't speak like ever, much less pleasantly, but I guess they get along alright.

[FinaLee]

Father was/is? an alcoholic. Momma hung with the wrong crowd until the divorce. She has since found another man in her life and has become an incredibly well-off person, especially when looking back. Unfortunately, I can't say the same for my old man. He still has a lot of issues to work out.

[DoctorStrongbad]

Glad to see all parents are not prfect like the ones you see on TV.

[RiverofBloodyTears2]

Well, the garzumba become connected with the 14th chamber and the chuchi spewed me out in a haze of glory

[NewgroundsNation]

i never had parents. i didn't live the most traditional life. i live the savage life

[injexen]

I don't really think you could call it a relationship...

[1sky1heart]

They're getting along really well now, I expect it will continue as long as I keep paying the maintenance fees on their plots.

[TheMadWasp]

DAD: I'm going to work now.
MUM: .........what?

Rinse and repeat.

[CorpseGrinderClock]

My parents' relationship is complicated by my dad's husband.

actually, it's probably rather simplified