three damned months and i decide to say hi, heads been up by god damned ass.

Between rage and utterly wishing for suicide clinics, i actaully decide to break the silence, honestly, i don't even know how that one works, but i'll tell y'all one thing, it's fucked.

enough of that though, how you all doing? sorry i ain't checked in, it would have been half-assed rants like my first sentence, but on my front, it ain't been all that hairy, i just need work, personal projects have gotten frozen due to my lack of motivation, i appologize for this, my work on kosmik hasn't moved, i just can't get creative right now, there's no motive to press on.....even though i really want to.

pretty much balls, huh? odd thing is that i believe it as i type it, what a pain in my ass.

just hope everything's going alright for everyone, honestly disregard my pain, it's normal for me.....an actual time of month approaches, not in the pmt way (lol) --- the 23rd of march marks a doomsday, i saw my nephew in a blasted coffin, not even a year old, i'm punching god for that, he'll know if i meet him, grr

what a head blag, I'm a wreck, hate this so much :(

wat?

If you're down that much, please seek professional help.

Drown your troubles with a 40oz,
Or go see a head doctor.
You could also try doing both.

it'll be alright mate. have a big glass of water, hit the hay and feel better in the morning. call a mental health helpline if it's urgent.

ahh, god, man, believe me, i've considered both options, doping out or professional help, but like, i ain't quite ready to hand in the towel, ya? appreciate the feedback, this is hugely appreciated.

It's a tough mo-fo, becuase talking about shit with a quack ain't gonna change shit, obviously, i just can't see the point in it....however, talking to people who probs have more of a clue.....ok twist me arm. (or gimme a dead one, it's good distractions haha)

just kinda rough as a badger's arse, fuck.....i mean, i drown me sorrows regularly (like, twice a week), and it's pretty much sublime......just these fucking memories, they don't go away, if dope lobotomized ya, i'd be an addict.....this ain't so posh, y'no?

At 3/14/15 09:44 PM, Monster-64 wrote: People are always complaining about their problems. What about my problems? No one has yet to photoshop me in TheGameChanger's thread yet.

Good point, man, y'know, it's solid as rock that one, it's the big question isn't it "and what of my problems?" --- so to nick a quote from final fantasy IX....."you'd think with all the problems in the world, there'd be more answers....it's not fair"

it's true stuff imho, i hear you man

Sucks. Hope you feel better soon.

Do not let the external problems cloud your internal happiness, savor the beauty within for you deserve it, never forget this

me too, I really hope this passes.

Fortunately, i'm blessed with the resilience of a roach, it's gonna take more than a nuke to snuff me, if it's much of an accolade.

gotta smile, no matter what, so here's a start :D

Depression does suck. Try and find good things to share in with others where you can, stay active where you can, and don't let not feeling the way you think you ought to feel in a given situation perpetuate itself through guilt.

This guy does a really great video on pain and dealing with it in a productive and realistic way. (The preface letter at the beginning isn't the subject, it's a letter from someone who had their own reasons for their depression, and unfortunately didn't make it past that).

At 3/14/15 09:36 PM, Ejit wrote: it'll be alright mate. have a big glass of water, hit the hay and feel better in the morning. call a mental health helpline if it's urgent.

And if this doesn't work, try some milk-plus - it'll make you ready for a bit of the old ultra-violence.

its all on those coping, mechs? yeh?

I'd be lying if i said the world's all rosey, cos it's not, it's a rough game.

What got me so cheesed off was reading the news tonight, there's so much afoot, it boggles me, because humans are mean't to be some kinda badasses, but i resent being one because there's so much ignorance and undignified conflict in the world......maybe i shouldn't think so much, because i'm not making them kinda mistakes....and i'll burn before i do, it's just so damned destitute, never any good news, it's just unadulterated balls.

it's enough to make you scream, moreso when you see how smiles disappear around you, the moment i spoke of was no different.....just so callous.

maybe someday, we'll see something new, till then we gotta stand at the line and play our hand....they didn't say it was gonna easy....somehow, it seems relevant to say, maybe it's just me, i dunno.....just can't pin it

Ah, depression.

Those were the days.

Sometimes I feel like cutting my life into pieces too. But trust me OP, it is not your last resort.

Just drown your depression in copious amounts of drugs and alcohol. It's (somewhat) worked for me over the years.

and I'm not talking about marijuana because that's for filthy hippies and doesn't do anything good.

I've got some anti-depression medicine.

Here, have a sample.

So your depressed about being depressed?

Good old Peanuts to the rescue!

At 3/15/15 11:01 AM, Ericho wrote: So your depressed about being depressed?

Good old Peanuts to the rescue!

lmao, this.

Sorry about the depression op. I've heard that petting fuzzy animals can help.

At 3/14/15 09:19 PM, martinuz2014 wrote:

enough of that though, how you all doing? sorry i ain't checked in, it would have been half-assed rants like my first sentence, but on my front, it ain't been all that hairy, i just need work, personal projects have gotten frozen due to my lack of motivation, i appologize for this, my work on kosmik hasn't moved, i just can't get creative right now, there's no motive to press on.....even though i really want to.

I think I may know the solution to your problems. It's fucking expensive but I imagine that you're buying antidepressants anyway.

just hope everything's going alright for everyone, honestly disregard my pain, it's normal for me.....an actual time of month approaches, not in the pmt way (lol) --- the 23rd of march marks a doomsday, i saw my nephew in a blasted coffin, not even a year old, i'm punching god for that, he'll know if i meet him, grr

That's sad news to hear. How did he die?

At 3/14/15 09:19 PM, martinuz2014 wrote: what a head blag, I'm a wreck, hate this so much :(

I think I do realise what are you going through, possibly since I also got depression (that was diagnosed by a professional, in fact).

And if there's one thing I hate more than depression itself, it's the people who keep forcing their belief that it could be healed with a bit of positive thinking. To me, it sounds like saying you can heal broken legs within minutes and a pill of aspirin. It doesn't work like that...

I wish you would step back from that ledge my friend, you could cut ties with all the lies you've been living in.

At 3/15/15 11:51 AM, Sensationalism wrote: Positive thinking does help though.

That's true, and let there be no doubt of it.

But let me just say what doesn't help: folks saying that you just should "be positive" over and over as if it just hadn't occurred to you. Basically, folks who are condescending and act like being depressed is just a stupid thing you decided to do for no reason.

At 3/15/15 02:20 PM, CorpseGrinderClock wrote:

At 3/15/15 11:51 AM, Sensationalism wrote: Positive thinking does help though.

That's true, and let there be no doubt of it.

But let me just say what doesn't help: folks saying that you just should "be positive" over and over as if it just hadn't occurred to you. Basically, folks who are condescending and act like being depressed is just a stupid thing you decided to do for no reason.

It is stupid and brought on upon self. It's from not doing anything and being a loser with a negative attitude, that's depression.

Get medication for your disease so that you can lead a more productive life. Also be careful and make sure you see a good doctor; not some quack.

I think that intellectual and creative people are more likely to be depressed. Maybe you're a smart artist.

I don't know how old you are but a natural lifespan is pretty long. It's not worth drudging through the whole thing.

At 3/15/15 03:00 PM, Hoodie wrote: Suck it up.

Whatever you're fat.

Have you ever tried keeping up a journal where you write all the positive things that made you happy that day?
I saw this video on YouTube and it was really inspiring and I'm not even someone that has to deal with depression or anxiety.
I have never been depressed in my life but if I would read that journal back when I'm in a sad mood, I would definitely be happy again!

You hate depression, but everyone hates you dude.

Depression - 1

You - 0

I'm depressed too. I'm currently not doing anything in my life but I know I have to somewhere down the line since my dad died and my mom won't live forever. All I want is to end my life with as little pain as possible which is why I'm contemplating sticking a knife in my jugular vein and bleeding out in a few seconds. No matter how painful it is I know that the pain will be over in about 30 seconds. Hopefully God can forgive me for committing suicide because I didn't have enough faith and stamina to life life the way He wanted to, but if he won't, so be it. If I had to endure 30 years of torture, I can certainly handle eternal damnation.