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At 6/10/14 10:40 PM, Zachary wrote:
You're right, it doesn't, but she doesn't know how Stereocrisis has treated me in the past, and how I have observed how he treats other people. I'm not going to change my opinion on him being a shitty person any time soon. Here is proof because apparently you're just as butthurt as she is over it.

Woah there, no need to be calling names or making assumptions. I was just pointing out that you were indeed picking on him, the reasons for which I'm sure are very valid to you. Do what you will, but you didn't disprove her statement.

On top of that, Sensationalism constantly trash talks moderators because she wants to be a social justice warrior or some bullshit. So me poking fun at her attention whore behavior is just my way of telling her to fuck off I guess.

I wasn't aware, but that's fair enough. Just seemed odd to me is all, I suppose.

At 6/10/14 10:54 PM, saltovergray wrote: I wasn't aware, but that's fair enough. Just seemed odd to me is all, I suppose.

Oh, you mean you don't know everything? What a humble white knight you are!

At 6/10/14 08:42 AM, Gobblemeister wrote: Did you feel my ass?

I rarely unfriend people from facebook. So when I noticed one girl whom I had a crush on in highschool was getting engaged, the feels all came flowing.

That feel when no gf. The more you fuck up the harder the feel hits you. This isn't me being all like "waaah I exchanged glances with a girl at school who could have been my soul mate". I could write a book of legitimate missed opportunities. Since 7th grade there have been girls I wanted to talk to but I'd always hesitate to the very last minute, and by the time I work up enough courage to talk to them, they've either moved or found a boyfriend. I barely have the confidence to ask a girl out, let alone convince her to leave her boyfriend for me. Every time I say "well this one will be different" it isn't. The one time I actually can convince a girl to go out with me, it turns out she's a lesbian and she just used me to hide it from her parents. And chances are she also felt sorry for me. I like to think that if I worked out a little, I'd magically become more confident, but I don't even have the motivation to lift more than the weight of my laptop. So I'll just sit here, letting my morale rot while it's very likely everyone ITT has experienced worse.

Anger. Pure unbridled anger, hell hath no fury like Nick Cage pissed off.

Nirvana isn't shitty grunge music and if you think it is, you might as well be a gigantic hipster listening to only Led Zepplin and playing RETRO games.

You know, because you're better than everybody else.

At 6/11/14 03:25 AM, angrybirds2000 wrote: if you disagree with my taste in music, you might as well be a gigantic hipster listening to only Led Zepplin and playing RETRO games even though hipsters don't even listen to led zeppelin.

You know, because I'm better than everybody else.

Fixed

At 6/10/14 09:07 PM, GingerGymnast wrote: I'm sorry you feel that way.

I don't want people feeling sorry for me, but thank you for being polite enough to say so.

Everyone has problems and no one's perfect.

I know.

You can choose to dwell on them for the rest of your life,

That's not a choice in my opinion. You dwell on shit whether or not you are consciously thinking about it. It attacks your subconscious, and gives you nightmares. Or so, it has done for me.

or you can figure out a way to incorporate them into your life in such a way that it makes you stronger, more unique.

I like to think that the whole experience teaches me something. I'm not so completely far gone that I've lost my mind. I'm very sane. Just saddened by the events in my life, to the point of traumatic experience. I sometimes think I have post traumatic stress syndrome, but honestly, it's more than that. Since the age of 15 I have felt so unbearably worthless that suicide seemed a likely happening. I was watching my poor father succumb to alcoholism, and insanity. He had lost his sense of taste and smell, and developed a seizure disorder after an accident at home left him permanently disabled. So many terrible days that followed of me watching him go into seizure after seizure.

You know, Oprah Winfrey (i'm sure none of you guys like her, I don't watch her) was born when her mother was 13. Oprah's mother had been severely abused and was a basket case, herself. Oprah herself was sexually abused from when she was 9 years old to when she was 13, at which point she got pregnant and had a stillbirth. After that she ended up in prison.
Talk about problems.

That's another thing. That story touches me. It saddens me. Some people have tried to comfort me by telling me how bad other people's lives suck in comparison, but that never made me feel better to know someone else was also miserable, or even more so miserable. I find no comfort in knowing that other people are in worse pain than me. That is terrible, and I am deeply sorry for anyone who knows the true definition of suffering. Agony is like being in love. Nobody can tell you you're in love. You just know. Just like agony. Nobody can understand it, unless they've known it. Oh, and trust me, you will. My feelings aren't weird. You just have yet to experience them. I'm sorry, but that is the hard truth. No matter who you are, you're fucked, and so is everyone and everything you find importance in. In 100 years, nothing will matter. We'll be dead. But that doesn't mean we won't first know a death bed. A sick, agonizing battle. That's the future if you live to be old. A miserable, painful, incredibly long and brutal period of nursing home nightmares. Wasting away while no one cares or visits.

Over time, she figured out how to change her life into something positive. Now look at her. At her recommendation, people stop eating meat altogether. She's worth a billion dollars. She has houses all around the world.
I'm not saying that physical things are the marker of success, but if some ghetto black girl can become such a huge hit and receive the love and admiration of millions of people, then I'm sure you can do something for your own self, too.

That is highly doubtful I will become Oprah, but I see your point. It COULD happen. I guess.

All I'm saying is, you can choose to do what you've always done and get what you've always gotten, or you can say "no more of this," and make yourself stronger. Those people hurting you are not going to go away. I'm sorry to be such a bitch here but you're on a pitty party and it's not doing you any good. You'll find people who'll commiserate with you about how hard life is and "gosh yea that sucks," but I hope you'll find, and listen to, the people who'll be a little harder on you and encourage you to do better.

Yeah, I don't need any encouragement though. That's the thing. I'm fairly intelligent. There is nothing wrong with me. The problem is the fucked up shit I've gone through because of other people.

My father was hard on me. I would do something, like a school project, or dance recital o gymnastics training or whatever, and he would ask me, Is that your best? Often times, it wasn't. He didn't tell me he was proud of me until I started doing the best I could - even if that meant I failed. Even if I (literally) fell on my face and made a fool of myself, as long as I did my best, that was all that counted. A few years later, I'm working alongside Olympic coaches, doing what I really love doing.

See, that's great. My father just wanted to die, and did. Sorry to be so blunt, but I'm not saying it for shock value. It's what happened. He didn't want to live anymore and so he killed himself. I wish I had had a strict father figure. I had no one for a while. Very lonely times.

I just think that blaming others for the way YOU feel is not doing you any good.

When you're personally blamed in your father's suicide note for his death, tell me if you blame him for how you feel.

It's your life.

Yeah.

Are you living it?

Day by day, nothing special.

Are you really happy with it?

Not at all.

What could you start doing right now to make things better for yourself?

Any path I've been down, regardless of my intention, had brought unexpected results.

I could go on but I realize that sometimes when I say things, it comes out a lot harsher than I intended it to.

Not really. I'm not that sensitive where I have to be treated like a frightened retard. lol Chill.

I'm trying to be motivating but it comes out as nagging sometimes. It IS your life and you get to decide what happens. I hope things work out well for you. Keep something in mind, something that someone told me when I was a kid and something I've heard many times after: every decision you've ever made got you to this point. Yes life happens to you that you don't plan for, but the way you reacted was your decision. The accumulation of those decisions got you here. What sort of decisions can you start making to get you to a place that you would love being in?
You can still PM me if you're curious about those self development titles I mentioned.
Take care.

Thank you. I think you think I'm a mental patient though. lol

You just have yet to experience them. I'm sorry, but that is the hard truth. No matter who you are, you're fucked, and so is everyone and everything you find importance in. In 100 years, nothing will matter. We'll be dead.

That's the reason why I have the philosophy of giving yourself to the whole of society to make your existence remotely meaningful rather than just caring about yourself.

At 6/10/14 10:40 PM, Zachary wrote: strong evidence why Stereocrisis is the devil, and why it's so important to justify making stupid posts in his threads.

Here's the thing Zachary. You've been butthurt for about 2 years now over some stupidity about how I told you off once. You need to locate your ball sack, and stop being such a pussy about something I don't even fucking remember. Swearing is how men talk, and if you want to be a big boy and judge my music, you can be a big boy and listen to my response to your needless, jerk off remarks.

I'm sorry if you're too sensitive to deal with my negative response, but in all fairness, what provoked me was your arrogance. That's why you've hated me for so long. You said something disparaging towards me, and I told you to fuck off in so many words. You then proceeded to cry until this day apparently.

, but that's really a fault within you. Not me.

Whatever I said so long ago that pissed you off is something I barely have a memory of. You really been mad this long? What a tool. Who dug this guy up to be a moderator again?

At 6/11/14 03:39 AM, GrizzlyOne wrote:

You just have yet to experience them. I'm sorry, but that is the hard truth. No matter who you are, you're fucked, and so is everyone and everything you find importance in. In 100 years, nothing will matter. We'll be dead.

That's the reason why I have the philosophy of giving yourself to the whole of society to make your existence remotely meaningful rather than just caring about yourself.

I agree with that statement. Which is what troubles me. I do like people. I want to have a place in society, and have a meaningful existence.

The problem is the lack a genuine people in my life. The society that doesn't care about me, even though I wish everyone luck, and no harm.

If he's really a mod and is mad over something that happened years ago, then I odn't understand why he's a mod either. Getting mad over something from years past is typically something only children do.

* Kid A trips kid B in the sandbox *

Kid B: " Why did you trip me?"

Kid A " because you called me stupid 3 years ago"

Kid C: " That was 3 years ago. No one gives a shit."

At 6/11/14 03:53 AM, Stereocrisis wrote:

At 6/11/14 03:39 AM, GrizzlyOne wrote:

You just have yet to experience them. I'm sorry, but that is the hard truth. No matter who you are, you're fucked, and so is everyone and everything you find importance in. In 100 years, nothing will matter. We'll be dead.

That's the reason why I have the philosophy of giving yourself to the whole of society to make your existence remotely meaningful rather than just caring about yourself.

I agree with that statement. Which is what troubles me. I do like people. I want to have a place in society, and have a meaningful existence.

The problem is the lack a genuine people in my life. The society that doesn't care about me, even though I wish everyone luck, and no harm.

Where do you live OP? your solution might be moving to a place more community based such a suburb, some southern areas of the U.S., or even a country like Norway or general northern Europe. (except for the NL, based on what I've seen on the internet, people in the NL act like people in the U.S. ; no offense.)

At 6/11/14 03:47 AM, Stereocrisis wrote: Swearing is how men talk

Maybe if you come from a shitty family with dads who stumble into your room drunk holding knives to their throats, you come off with that impression about adults.

That's not how mature people talk. Grow up.

At 6/11/14 03:54 AM, Vnzi wrote:

At 6/11/14 03:47 AM, Stereocrisis wrote: Whatever I said so long ago that pissed you off is something I barely have a memory of. You really been mad this long? What a tool. Who dug this guy up to be a moderator again?

Good lord you're so full of yourself that I can see your head sticking out of your ass.

Actually, Zachary here has been harassing me for quite some time. I don't know why that makes me "full of myself". I'm serious. If he has a problem with something I said so long ago, he's a tool. I don't even care anymore. He's just holding onto it like I'm supposed to be an asshole everyday of my life. He needs to realize that this is the internet. Specifically, this is newgrounds. People here talk shit from time to time. If he can't take the heat, he needs to get out of the kitchen, and retire from his moderator position here. Because honestly, I've always considered him a douchebag. He voted all my audio submissions down daily. He's just mad. Plain and simple. No way around it. Regardless what you think of me. Whatever is going on with me is irrelevant. Look at him. He's just mad.

At 6/11/14 04:01 AM, Profanity wrote:

At 6/11/14 03:47 AM, Stereocrisis wrote: Swearing is how men talk

Maybe if you come from a shitty family with dads who stumble into your room drunk holding knives to their throats, you come off with that impression about adults.

That's not how mature people talk. Grow up.

I don't need to take your hypocritical advice about swearing. Especially since your name is Profanity.

Despite the wisdom in your little soapbox preacher moment, you are undeniably ignorant. Swearing IS how men talk. Lots of women too. If Zachary still can't cope with those words, which I don't even mean anymore, or haven't meant for a long time, than he is a fool. I'm not picking a fight with him. He instead picks fights with me. I've been coming to this website since I was in eight grade. So he can blow me if he doesn't like my presence here. I was here first. Just didn't sign up right away.

I think either humor, or happiness.

I don't know why, I guess it's because I always see things on a hyper optimistic scale and I never take life seriously.

At 6/10/14 04:57 PM, Zachary wrote: How to make a Stereocrisis thread:

1. Post something that is extremely egotistical

Admitting depression is egotistical?

and pretend you are open for discussion.

It is open for discussion. I don't even know what that's supposed to mean.

4. When someone calls you out on your shitty behavior, take one of two paths:
-----a. blame it on your ex-wife.
-----b. make a post in another thread denouncing bullying and saying you always take the high road.

Excuse me, but I never denied my shitty behavior. I'm calling you a pussy for hanging onto a fight we had like 2 years ago. Is it really even that important anymore? I've flat out told you that's not who I am, and mostly, I was just blowing off steam. Let it go.

5. Repeat.

More like, How to ruin a Stereocrisis thread.

1. Be Zachary.

At 6/11/14 04:01 AM, Profanity wrote: That's not how mature people talk. Grow up.

What the actual fuck is wrong with cussing.

Because for one, fuck isn't even a real word, it's an acronym that doesn't even stand for something bad.

The only cuss word I can think of that might legitimately be bad is shit, and that's just because no one really knows where it came from with certainty.

At 6/11/14 03:47 AM, Stereocrisis wrote:

At 6/10/14 10:40 PM, Zachary wrote: strong evidence why Stereocrisis is the devil, and why it's so important to justify making stupid posts in his threads.

Here's the thing Zachary. You've been butthurt for about 2 years now over some stupidity about how I told you off once. You need to locate your ball sack, and stop being such a pussy about something I don't even fucking remember. Swearing is how men talk, and if you want to be a big boy and judge my music, you can be a big boy and listen to my response to your needless, jerk off remarks.

Butthurt? No, I just think you're a shitty person who needs to be told they are shitty. Based on your responses to people in this thread and every other thread you make, it is evident how much of a shithead you are. The best part is people who are reading this don't even know the funniest part of our interactions. How you childishly tried to weasel your way out of responsibility by blaming your poor responses on your ex-wife and how she was trying to defend your or some bullshit lol.

I'm sorry if you're too sensitive to deal with my negative response, but in all fairness, what provoked me was your arrogance. That's why you've hated me for so long. You said something disparaging towards me, and I told you to fuck off in so many words. You then proceeded to cry until this day apparently.

I don't hate you, you just suck. Don't get too full of yourself now.

, but that's really a fault within you. Not me.

Whatever I said so long ago that pissed you off is something I barely have a memory of. You really been mad this long? What a tool. Who dug this guy up to be a moderator again?

Heh, what's the deal with airline food amirite guys? Like me. Please.

Seriously, like me.

It be hot up in here.

*sweats profusely*

At 6/11/14 05:50 AM, yurgenburgen wrote: *sweats profusely*

At 6/11/14 05:50 AM, yurgenburgen wrote: *sweats profusely*

*hands a washcloth*

real ngers dont have any feelins

At 6/11/14 05:46 AM, Zachary wrote:

At 6/11/14 03:47 AM, Stereocrisis wrote:

At 6/10/14 10:40 PM, Zachary wrote: strong evidence why Stereocrisis is the devil, and why it's so important to justify making stupid posts in his threads.

Here's the thing Zachary. You've been butthurt for about 2 years now over some stupidity about how I told you off once. You need to locate your ball sack, and stop being such a pussy about something I don't even fucking remember. Swearing is how men talk, and if you want to be a big boy and judge my music, you can be a big boy and listen to my response to your needless, jerk off remarks.

Butthurt?

Yep.

No, I just think you're a shitty person

This ought to be good. So, you've met me then? (No.) We've hung out? (No.) You've made an attempt to be cool with me? (No.) So, I'm a shitty person? I guess so. I mean, you would know, right? You seem to know lots of things about me. (Not really.)

who needs to be told they are shitty.

Sounds like you're the shit bag, just from these comments alone, but okay, continue...

Based on your responses to people in this thread and every other thread you make, it is evident how much of a shithead you are.

You're such a pretentious tool it's mind numbing.

When people here get rude with me, I give it right back. That's the reason you've seen me act out. Most people here tend to toss off asshole comments like it's nothing. So, what you've seen is my reaction to that. Someone gets rude for no reason, and just because I have backbone enough to stick up for myself, and tell these idiots to blow me, that makes me a shithead? Wow, damned if I do, damned if I don't.

The best part is people who are reading this don't even know the funniest part of our interactions.

Oh, you mean like all the times you needlessly start shit, and I shut you down? Yeah, that was pretty funny when I told you off all those times. I didn't think you thought that was funny.

How you childishly tried to weasel your way out of responsibility by blaming your poor responses on your ex-wife

Nothing childish about the truth. There have been occasions when she was on newgrounds, on my account, and told you off.

and how she was trying to defend your or some bullshit lol.

Yeah, I do remember that actually. What, you still don't believe me? I shared a computer with her for 6 years. Not my fault you don't believe it. Trust me. I take responsibility for calling you an idiot the majority of the time. I'm not denying that. I think you're completely retarded. You've been standing on my dick for like a year now all because you can't get over what should have been one isolated incident. Reason it wasn't isolated? You kept it up. And on, and on, and on... Which is why I said you're butthurt, and which is why I think you must suffer from autism.

I'm sorry if you're too sensitive to deal with my negative response, but in all fairness, what provoked me was your arrogance. That's why you've hated me for so long. You said something disparaging towards me, and I told you to fuck off in so many words. You then proceeded to cry until this day apparently.

I don't hate you, you just suck. Don't get too full of yourself now.

You don't hate me? lol Then stop fucking with me maybe? I wouldn't show you my side that sucks if you didn't give me a reason every time you open your mouth.

, but that's really a fault within you. Not me.

Whatever I said so long ago that pissed you off is something I barely have a memory of. You really been mad this long? What a tool. Who dug this guy up to be a moderator again?

Heh, what's the deal with airline food amirite guys? Like me. Please.

Seriously, like me.

Guy, I have real friends. That's actually a big part of why I don't try to reach a resolution with you. You're a nobody to me. I don't need you to like me. lol Especially not you. Assholes don't have friends. You must know what I'm talking about, right?

Let's examine this section of your post. It's very important.

At 6/10/14 05:59 AM, Stereocrisis wrote: I could talk forever about personal injustices.. What would it matter? Look who I'm spilling my guts to! Just more people, with more ignorant things to say about the difficulties in my life.

You make a thread (as in, a topic open for discussion with, you know, other people). In the thread you discuss your feelings and some of your problems. Then you specifically belittle the audience, calling them ignorant and saying they don't understand the problems in your life (as if anyone desperately wants to hear about your struggles to begin with). If you already have a low opinion of us then why are you sharing these details? Why should anyone bother posting? You've already made up your mind. We're just supposed to sit here in awe as you bestow your painful memories upon us. Maybe we'll become more enlightened to your suffering, Stereocrisis. Maybe we....will back a waaaaaaaaaaay.....stay-a waaaaaaaaaay....once and for all.....

I just thought I would take it upon myself to save people the trouble of actually reading your soliloquy and highlight the only portion of this thread that matters. It puts all of your posts into perspective. Cheers :)

I don't think you're a mental patient, and I'm not treating you like you're a retard. I think the majority of the people on here are so much in the habit of attacking one another over any small thing, that when someone is trying to be sensitive, you read too deeply into it. I'm not looking down on you, I'm trying to be helpful and supportive.

A lot of people on here are being rude for the sake of being rude. I don't agree at all when someone says you're a shitty person. I think maybe your behaviour is shitty and unproductive, but *you* are not shitty. Behaviours change. You're alright.

That being said, I think a lot of people here have an underlying message: this isn't the first time you've posted something like this and you make a habit of not taking anyone's advice. While I agree that Newgrounds isn't exactly the hotspot for person-to-person support systems, the people who DO give you advice are being ignored and argued with. You're telling everyone on a subtle level, "I'm a lost cause."

Stereocrisis, I think it would do you some good to challenge your own beliefs. You're telling me how it is, the way things are, and I don't think you really understand what i was trying to convey in my post. I didn't tell you the Oprah story to compare you to her. I'm saying, if someone who had it REALLY bad can make something of themselves, you can too. I'm not saying you should be exactly like Oprah, but you can be like her, in that you can turn a bad situation into something positive for you. If one person can do it, ANYONE can do it. There are a LOT of stories of people who have been given terrible circumstances in life and they made something good out of it. Google Victor Frankle.

I'm not saying it's easy. I have no experience with a father's death or being blamed for it. Maybe therapy would be helpful to you, but it only would if you were open to receiving help and to changing the way you see the world. That would mean you'd have to let things go and move on.

Maybe it sounds impossible right now.I remember in highschool we were told a story about a science experiment that showed learned helplessness. Maybe you've heard it before.
A puppy was placed in a cage that had charges set on the bottom. The charges would send painful electric shocks to the puppy, who would bark, and try to escape. It would run up against the cage and do whatever it could to get out until it learned that it couldn't. So it just laid down and cried.
Another puppy was put in a separate cage, but this one had its top removed. The electricity shocked the puppy, and he easily was able to jump out.
Then they put both puppies into a cage with its top off. The second puppy again jumped out and the first one just laid down and whimpered, even though it had just seen the other puppy escape. It had been taught that there was no hope for it.

I think you would do yourself a favour if you actively sought to challenge your beliefs about what is possible for you. Maybe seek counselling. Maybe read some books on the subject. Maybe get off newgrounds for awhile because these guys are really depressing here and find their own amusement in bringing you down. Maybe you need a change of scene.

Here's another story that you might find interesting. It's about being taught how to find hope.
A lab rat was put in a tank where the water had been turned opaque by colouring. there was an island in the center of the tank that the rat was unaware of. The researchers put the rat in the tank and let it swim. Eventually the rat found the island and was able to cling onto it to avoid drowning.
Another rat was placed in a separate tank that had the same opaque water and no island. The rat swam and swam and could find no respite, so it eventually ran out of energy and sank. The researchers picked it up and saved it before it died.
Then, the researchers put BOTH rats in a tank with no island and monitored how long they lasted. The rat who had found the island the first time swam twice as long as the other rat, desperately looking for an island to cling to.

I like this because it sort of shows how even rats can have optimism. Whether it's puppies or rats, they can be taught certain behaviours that affect them in the future. Maybe you can find your own island to cling to, even if it's only in your mind. I hope so, anyway.

This is such a juicy installment of NGBBS. Lots of character development, a bit of filled in back story, tons of dramatic confrontation.

I wonder if this will end in a neutral party giving a cathartic speech about how we could all stand to improve as human beings and shouldn't hound others for not being at the same point of their life's journey as us, because in reality we should all be working together to enrich each others' lives by offering compassionate support and thus helping to fill our normally insignificant lives with a little more fellowship and meaning under the guise of a forum on an old forgotten website for nerds. Then they'd finish with something like, "Life is hard enough, so why not make it easier for each other if we have the chance?"

Or we could have another season of re-re-hashed arguments which never lead to any form of reconciliation or enhanced moral clarity at the end and simply repeat ad infinitum. But, I mean, if I wanted to see that, I'd just watch pretty much any show on Oxygen.