Please Cheer Me Up

[exudaz]

I'm at a really shitty point in my life.
I'm a highschool freshman. My grades are going to be closing soon, and I have a fuckton of tests coming up that I know I can never possibly pass, and I have deadlines for projects all over the place. And grades are all my parents care about. My father is a genius and he always compares himself to me. He was top of his class and got straight A's in highschool. I could never possibly compare to him. He's just smarter than me, and I hate having to compare to someone I can never possibly match.

Everything seems like it has a deadline. I always need to worry about time, and it always seems to be against me. It's just stress piled on stress piled on stress. I hate it. And that's all anyone ever talks about. "You have until May third to hand this in, there's a test tomorrow, you have three hours to study, you have a minute before the quiz." It's like I can never be without worry of a ton of deadlines right in my face that I can barely reach.

And for the past year, I've been trying to lose weight to no avail. I want to lose twenty pounds, but I can never pull it off. My house is just filled with sweets and food, and I have awful self-control. I always feel fat and ugly and I can never be complacent with myself.

Everything seems pointless and going downhill. I don't see the point anymore. Everything is just shit and I don't like anyone. Everyone in my classes are loud douches that I want no business with. I don't feel that I can relate to anyone. They piss me off every day, they're just so immature and obnoxious. I can't carry on a meaningful conversation with any of them. I feel like you guys are the only people I can have an intelligent conversation with anymore.

I really don't see the point of living anymore. It's like, if I kill myself I'll finally be without stress and free. I won't need to live a shitty existence where I hate everyone and my grades are going down the drain. I won't need to compare myself to anyone or live up to unrealistic expectations set by others. It'll be over and I won't have anymore worries. No more gaining weight, no more bad grades, no more tests, no being compared to my father, no more anything.

I don't know what to do anymore. Please help me. I've never been this sad or hopeless before.

[yurgenburgen]

you remind me of me when I was at school

it was only after leaving school and being unemployed for a year and a half did I realise how pointless everything I did in school was, and I was a sucker for getting my homework done on time thinking it would pay off in the end (it never did)

I suppose what I'm saying is your feelings are totally justified but try to always remember how meaningless your schoolwork really is in the cosmic sense, because it amounts to nothing in the end

[Clamstuffer]

Dude you got it so easy. Try dealing with that in college and having to worry about bills and rent and health insurance and maintaining a vehicle and 90% of the shit you don't have to deal with. You're on fucking easy mode bro. Man up and just handle your shit. Prepare for the future. Your entire life is ahead of you and can be anything. You haven't even lived long enough to fuck your life up and have to dig yourself out of a hole. Nothing you have done at this point in your life will even matter in the long run—AND THAT IS A GOOD THING—you can be anything. If I was you right now I'd be fucking singing and dancing.

[Head-Full-Of-Acid]

relax as much as you can

your work in school is important, do your best. it's not really stressful in the scheme of things. feel confident in your ability to accomplish your goals.

don't worry about comparing to your father. just make sure to do everything you can, no regrets, try everything you can, your best is good enough.

be comfortable with yourself, with who you are. if you really want to change yourself, you'll work hard to accomplish this.

and try to understand that all people are different. they have different ways of expressing themselves. allow your views of the world to be more adaptable, but also seek people you share common interest with. there's always someone out there.

and never think that way. there's so many beautiful things in life to experience, so many amazing people, it'll all come eventually.

you're doin fine, don't worry so much.

[Urban-Champion]

Life is so much more than just school and high school though. Look towards the future where you don't have to deal with any of the bullshit associated with it, and all of a sudden these problems are immediately irrelevant to your life. School is NOTHING like the real world, mang. Just remember that.

And all of the negativity you may experienced can be applied to better yourself as a person.

[GamesArmor]

At 5/28/14 02:09 AM, exudaz wrote: I'm at a really shitty point in my life.
I really don't see the point of living anymore. It's like, if I kill myself I'll finally be without stress and free.

You're not going to kill yourself yet. "i have no friends and I'm too lazy to improve my situation even though I know I can" isn't a reason anyone ever kills themselves. Even extremely emotionally unstable/weak people need to be backed into a corner before they kill themselves. People kill themselves when there's no hope, not when they're too fucking lazy to improve the situation.

you guys are the only people I can have an intelligent conversation with anymore.

Please. Newgrounds BBS is a fun place to be but it's hardly on the top shelf of places to be for intellectual discussion. I'm not saying it's full of stupid people, but the best way I can put this is that it's extremely hard, especially nowadays to find a place on the internet with a variety of intelligent discussion.

Point is you're just fucking lazy. Get a grip. You've got a lot of chances to unfuck your situation. Hell, I'd consider myself to be in a worse situation than you. My cynicism has eaten me to my core. You sound like you have some idealism you can hang onto that lets you like things. I don't even have that, and I'm probably more of a social misfit than you are. I haven't had someone I could call a real friend in 7 years. Although I am pretty slim, so I have got that on you.

Buck up. This isn't even a "first world problems" thing. You have a lot of time to change your mistakes.

[Ejit]

Be a real man and hope it goes away.

Honestly it sounds like you could do with a year out, if that's an option.

[Ejit]

At 5/28/14 02:22 AM, Clamstuffer wrote: Man up and just handle your shit.

At 5/28/14 04:06 AM, GamesArmor wrote: Buck up.

Oh, and most importantly just ignore whatever these stupid cocks have to say LOL

[Ron-Geno]

If it makes you feel any better, alot of people have felt like shit during this part of their lives. And they made it through and went on to do stuff in life.

Ah, the father pleasing shit.
Get through HS. After that, you can leave the pleasing of your father to your mom. You probably won't be able to please him anywho; at that point, you have to LIVE YOUR LIFE, dude.

Deadlines. Unless you become your own boss, you'll have way more coming up. And they get tighter with time. I recommend taking time management courses.

Discipline is hard to get on your own. Sports, a martial art, or being part of some team at your school will help with your self-control skills (usually). Plus you'll have people to share shit with, and that always helps. Having some type of accountability buddy will help with the fattyness in your life.

Don't kill yourself; seriously, don't.

"But...but...but..."
BITCH I said don't kill yourself; don't ask questions!

[Dr-Worm]

At 5/28/14 02:09 AM, exudaz wrote: I'm a highschool freshman. My grades are going to be closing soon, and I have a fuckton of tests coming up that I know I can never possibly pass, and I have deadlines for projects all over the place.

Okay, first of all just take a couple deep breaths or something. Your grades as a high school freshman really don't count for much of anything in the long run. Obviously you should still try to do your best, but my point is that it's not worth stressing over as if getting a bad grade will ruin your life. Take this time to learn how to study/manage your time better so you'll be less stressed once things actually do count.

And grades are all my parents care about. My father is a genius and he always compares himself to me. He was top of his class and got straight A's in highschool. I could never possibly compare to him. He's just smarter than me, and I hate having to compare to someone I can never possibly match.

Have you tried talking to them about any of this? I'm pretty sure your parents care more about your mental well-being than they do about your grades.

As for your dad, obviously I don't know the particulars of your situation but unfortunately that's just something parents sometimes do, often unconsciously. Again, have you tried seriously talking to him about it? I think if you did you may well find that you're putting more pressure on yourself than he's putting on you.

Everything seems like it has a deadline. I always need to worry about time, and it always seems to be against me. It's just stress piled on stress piled on stress. I hate it. And that's all anyone ever talks about. "You have until May third to hand this in, there's a test tomorrow, you have three hours to study, you have a minute before the quiz." It's like I can never be without worry of a ton of deadlines right in my face that I can barely reach.

Well honestly it's not going to get any easier. People get through the day not because they don't have deadlines and stresses to worry about but because they've learned how to manage them. That's what you're doing right now. It's okay to feel overwhelmed because your only job right now is to learn. It's okay because the consequences you'll face for failure are just bad grades and disappointment, not starvation and homelessness. But by the time you get to that point you'll be much better equipped to deal with shit.

And honestly adults get overwhelmed like this plenty of times too, but again, you eventually learn how to manage it. And part of learning how to manage it is learning when to stop being so hard on yourself, to take a few breaks, to relax.

And for the past year, I've been trying to lose weight to no avail. I want to lose twenty pounds, but I can never pull it off. My house is just filled with sweets and food, and I have awful self-control. I always feel fat and ugly and I can never be complacent with myself.

Again, have you talked to your parents? If you let them know you're trying to lose weight then they can work with you to make sure you only have healthy food in the house.

And do you exercise? Because eating right alone probably isn't going to cut it. Besides, exercise releases endorphins and helps to relieve stress/depression. Or so I'm told at least, I've been dragging my feet about this too.

I really don't see the point of living anymore. It's like, if I kill myself I'll finally be without stress and free. I won't need to live a shitty existence where I hate everyone and my grades are going down the drain. I won't need to compare myself to anyone or live up to unrealistic expectations set by others.

Being stuck socially with a bunch of random shitty kids you don't relate to. Constantly feeling like you're being judged by your parents. Worrying about grades. Y'know what all these things have in common? They're temporary problems that are exclusive to kids. Adults get to choose their own peer groups, they don't live with their parents, and they don't have grades. So even if you resigned yourself to being totally miserable in your present circumstances and did nothing to try to make things better for yourself (which, of course, is a terrible fucking idea), all you'd have to do is just survive for three years and all these problems would disappear anyway.

Please please please don't even think about implementing such a permanent solution to such temporary problems. It is so so so not worth it.

I don't know what to do anymore. Please help me. I've never been this sad or hopeless before.

It's super late and I need to go to sleep, so sorry I couldn't go into more detail. Honestly knowing this site I kind of half-expect to wake up tomorrow and find that you were just trolling or whatever, but assuming that's not the case, seriously, feel free to send me a PM whenever and I'd be more than happy to talk.

[Satan]

Everything yurgen said on this topic is correct, schoolwork doesn't really mean shit in the real world, you shouldn't stress about it at all. I was in a similar position as yourself when I was in highschool, getting stressed out about fucking everyone, and everything to the point where it actually made me incredibly unwell.

At 5/28/14 02:09 AM, exudaz wrote: I feel like you guys are the only people I can have an intelligent conversation with anymore.

Also, Jesus Christ, how absolutely horrifying.

[freaksy101]

Don't panic about your school work. Just work on it when you can. Don't stress about it.

Also to lose weight just have a little jog everyday. Don't push your body to the extreme or give up. A little bit every day will help. My mum does these exercises every day and she has lost loads of weight. Now don't keep loads of sweets in the house or that'll give you temptation. Also don't feel ugly. If you hate yourself when you think about it you will feel the need to comfort eat. Just focus on losing the weight and not on hating yourself. Also don't go on any extreme diets. Just eat less unhealthy food. You can still eat meat and such.

The people you say are obnoxious and immature are probably what you americans refer to as "jocks" and "preps". Just avoid them and try socializing with less popular students.

Also DO NOT commit suicide. You could have a very accomplished life and you can't just throw it away. Your family will miss you. You need to tell them how you feel. They know you better than I.

[SubliminalVirus]

That's just how it is. Every school year the majority of us are freaking out, being compared to smarter people, and nearly being late on many things. You just need to try and take things one step at a time. Sort out what needs to be done sooner and what needs to be done later. Heck, I'm in that shit load of stress at the moment too, as a homeschooler I don't really have anyone to ask for help and whatnot. Schedule your days, and at the end of each day do something you enjoy. You just have to learn to deal with stress, because next you will be stressed out about college and then a job... Good luck

[hoorayjay]

You just gotta slave it out dude, the only way to get through things is to slave it out. Hand in your work, try and find loopholes that aid you. Don't take no all the time. If you can argue your point, go ahead.

Here is a picture of me in a dress

[Radaketor]

At 5/28/14 12:49 PM, hoorayjay wrote: Here is a picture of me in a dress

Glorious

[Viper]

At 5/28/14 12:49 PM, hoorayjay wrote: Here is a picture of me in a dress

Well thats....not completely horrifying. But I felt myself throw up a bit in my mouth.....

[Nationals1995]

At 5/28/14 02:09 AM, exudaz wrote: I'm at a really shitty point in my life.
I'm a highschool freshman. My grades are going to be closing soon, and I have a fuckton of tests coming up that I know I can never possibly pass, and I have deadlines for projects all over the place. And grades are all my parents care about. My father is a genius and he always compares himself to me. He was top of his class and got straight A's in highschool. I could never possibly compare to him. He's just smarter than me, and I hate having to compare to someone I can never possibly match.

Everything seems like it has a deadline. I always need to worry about time, and it always seems to be against me. It's just stress piled on stress piled on stress. I hate it. And that's all anyone ever talks about. "You have until May third to hand this in, there's a test tomorrow, you have three hours to study, you have a minute before the quiz." It's like I can never be without worry of a ton of deadlines right in my face that I can barely reach.

And for the past year, I've been trying to lose weight to no avail. I want to lose twenty pounds, but I can never pull it off. My house is just filled with sweets and food, and I have awful self-control. I always feel fat and ugly and I can never be complacent with myself.

Everything seems pointless and going downhill. I don't see the point anymore. Everything is just shit and I don't like anyone. Everyone in my classes are loud douches that I want no business with. I don't feel that I can relate to anyone. They piss me off every day, they're just so immature and obnoxious. I can't carry on a meaningful conversation with any of them. I feel like you guys are the only people I can have an intelligent conversation with anymore.

I really don't see the point of living anymore. It's like, if I kill myself I'll finally be without stress and free. I won't need to live a shitty existence where I hate everyone and my grades are going down the drain. I won't need to compare myself to anyone or live up to unrealistic expectations set by others. It'll be over and I won't have anymore worries. No more gaining weight, no more bad grades, no more tests, no being compared to my father, no more anything.

I don't know what to do anymore. Please help me. I've never been this sad or hopeless before.

I know this would be hard to do, but here is what I'd suggest. Just forget what problems lie before you and focus on re-invigorating yourself. Create a new identity for yourself, who am I? Who do I want to become? If you want to excel at School, cut out the things that hold you back from doing it. It may seem hard, but just do it. There will be temptations at first, but then it will become routine. If you suffer a setback, forget about the problem and re-invigorate yourself, start over. Just start over, don't say you can't do it because YOU can do it. Take a look at people, Thomas Edison went through hundreds of non-working bulbs before he got a working one. The Olympians you hear about or watch on TV spend hours of preparation for their moment in fame. It just takes time and perseverance, restriction and discipline to create the focus and skill needed to succeed. Don't set limits for yourself, it will hold you back, instead, try to become the best that you can be. You need to stop pushing in the wrong direction and take a break. Don't take too long of a break, but once you feel like you are going into lazy shock (when you don't want to do anything) then start up and take care of business.

Everyone has experienced times of setback and rejection, but many of those who fail to overcome it don't realize that they can overcome it simply by choosing to avoid it and regroup. Good luck and hopefully you can see the positivity of each step you take in the right direction.

Nationals1995

[Madjasper1]

Don't worry man, it will be fine. I have the most important exam of my life on Tuesday, and the pressure is building up, I've been bullied all throughout Secondary School, and I have a heart condition, but look at me now!

I make forum posts on a terrible website and I have 58 subscirbers on YouTube. If you don't do well, you can always be on the internet all day like I am. :D

in all seriousness though, it will be fine.

[FaisalOrb]

At 5/28/14 02:22 AM, Clamstuffer wrote: Dude you got it so easy. Try dealing with that in college and having to worry about bills and rent and health insurance and maintaining a vehicle and 90% of the shit you don't have to deal with. You're on fucking easy mode bro. Man up and just handle your shit. Prepare for the future. Your entire life is ahead of you and can be anything. You haven't even lived long enough to fuck your life up and have to dig yourself out of a hole. Nothing you have done at this point in your life will even matter in the long run—AND THAT IS A GOOD THING—you can be anything. If I was you right now I'd be fucking singing and dancing.

Actually so far college seems easier than highschool
Cos at least college throws shit at you that you can handle
Highschool throws loads of work beyond your capacity and expects you do it

[GrizzlyOne]

It'll be alright. A lot of us have had that feel before and we've gotten through it. (don't mean to make that sound negative if it does sound negative.)