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What do you think?

700 Views | 2 Replies
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What do you think? 2014-02-03 00:03:11


I am a writer and I write poetic quotes.
Essentially, just quotes that have a deep meaning to them and no they aren't your typical teen shitty quotes.
I like to think outside the box with my writing.

Please tell me your opinions on my work.
You can see more of my work here

Response to What do you think? 2014-02-03 00:30:02


This is probably more suited to the writing forum, but since you asked I'll offer you my opinion.

They read like a combination of fragments of ideas that might work if they were a part of some larger work, like a song etc. ("Hand in hand, walk the rest of the way with me"), statements where the logic of an association is sacrificed in favour of simply sounding deep ("Envy the stars, for they know nothing of broken hearts"), things that almost feel like those parodies of inspirational quotes where the end of a sentence sacrifices the poetry of the start ("Inject me with perfection. And if I break, you can always replace part of me with plastic"), awkward rephrasing of other people's ideas ("Man is a beast who learned to count and tie his shoes") and the exact sort of pithy teenage quote that you seem to want to avoid ("I can only be what I am. And you're useless to me if you can't accept that" - though maybe that's more of a Popeye quote).

Also what you believe in feels really inconsistent over the small number of quotes you've posted. You wrote a number of them celebrating the romanticism of life and dreams, and then you say that man is a beast who learned to count and tie his shoes. You also tell people to stop wondering (aka dreaming) and step outside (into the world), and then in the next sequential image tell people to hide from the world in their dreams. It's very strange.

In general, the best quotes are sentences that come from larger works (poetry, novels, speeches, plays), where they are the culmination of the exploration of an idea. When people just try to come up with an inspirational quote, it just feels like someone trying to come up with an inspirational quote or, at the worst, like someone trying to come up with a t-shirt slogan.

Also, if I was critiquing this as visual art, I'd say it's a very ugly font you're using. Maybe vary it up to fit each individual quote.


Aigis - Putting the 'ai' back in 'Aigis'.

BBS Signature

Response to What do you think? 2014-02-03 00:39:50


At 2/3/14 12:30 AM, Aigis wrote: This is probably more suited to the writing forum, but since you asked I'll offer you my opinion.

They read like a combination of fragments of ideas that might work if they were a part of some larger work, like a song etc. ("Hand in hand, walk the rest of the way with me"), statements where the logic of an association is sacrificed in favour of simply sounding deep ("Envy the stars, for they know nothing of broken hearts"), things that almost feel like those parodies of inspirational quotes where the end of a sentence sacrifices the poetry of the start ("Inject me with perfection. And if I break, you can always replace part of me with plastic"), awkward rephrasing of other people's ideas ("Man is a beast who learned to count and tie his shoes") and the exact sort of pithy teenage quote that you seem to want to avoid ("I can only be what I am. And you're useless to me if you can't accept that" - though maybe that's more of a Popeye quote).

Also what you believe in feels really inconsistent over the small number of quotes you've posted. You wrote a number of them celebrating the romanticism of life and dreams, and then you say that man is a beast who learned to count and tie his shoes. You also tell people to stop wondering (aka dreaming) and step outside (into the world), and then in the next sequential image tell people to hide from the world in their dreams. It's very strange.

In general, the best quotes are sentences that come from larger works (poetry, novels, speeches, plays), where they are the culmination of the exploration of an idea. When people just try to come up with an inspirational quote, it just feels like someone trying to come up with an inspirational quote or, at the worst, like someone trying to come up with a t-shirt slogan.

Also, if I was critiquing this as visual art, I'd say it's a very ugly font you're using. Maybe vary it up to fit each individual quote.

I see. My quotes seem inconsistent because the ones that were different from others were made for people that wanted those quotes that way. They were commission works. Plus, each quote means something completely different. I for one would get bored with a quotes if they all have the same tone. The font I can change from time to time even though you are first to say that it is unappealing. Haha. Also, my quotes aren't meant to be inspirational. They are meant to be themselves. I didn't set out to write quotes that would lift people's spirits. They are meant to just be there. They are their own universe sort to say. However, I do appreciate the criticism and I didn't know there was a writing section so my bad.