Weird Stories from Parents

[Entice]

What are some weird stories your parents have told you about something that happened in your childhood that you do not remember? Do you ever question whether or not these things actually happened?

Apparently when I was three or so I shit on a tree in the woods behind our house. On a tree as in there was just a turd stuck to the side of the tree at my ass height. There were other kids playing in the woods with me but no one could explain how it happened

Your turn

[Yoshiii343]

My mum once told me that she knew Dwayne Johnson before his wrestling days. Being the gullible idiot that I was, I bought the story.

not very weird, but it's a story nonetheless

[Thor]

My Dad was in the Army, and they used to do cross-training with Canadians sometimes, and he was in this Irish unit and he always tells me a story about a barfight him and his units got into with the Canadians. He has a lot of crazy/weird army stories

[Gimmick]

when my mom was pregnant with me she was on the escalator of an airport; nobody else was there (my dad had gone elsewhere for the luggage) when she fell down. next thing, there was a person who told her to grab his arm, and she did; she was pulled back and got off the escalator safely.
she looked everywhere around her, but after getting off safely she couldn't find the person whom had saved her (and to a degree, me)

and that's her story about the proof of god. whaddya know

[Cyberdevil]

At 11/11/13 04:46 AM, Entice wrote: Your turn

They say I was accidentally dropped on the floor at birth. Can't say I remember that...

Life's a bumpy ride!

[generalwinter]

There are several stories about how I loved vacuums as a youngster, but I don't remember liking them, and hate vacuums now.

[KatMaestro]

My parents told me once they were fishing at a creek and saw something in water. My mom said she heard a voice then they saw something was flying. My parents believe there was God who whispered to them. They made the first kiss... That was how the fell in love...

I bought the story until I hit purbety

[CrazyRock]

My mom told a story about a bug biting my penis when I was a baby, and how I was rushed to the hospital and they didn't even put me to sleep, they cut some bug poison and shit right there in the hallway while I was awake and screaming like a motherfucker.

this is actually a true story (at least she told it like it is)

[Little-Kinky]

Apparently, when I was like 3, I was in one of those big playpen things at a mall, with a slide, jungle gym, everything. Another girl was standing on this platform on top of the slide with me, and we were yelling at each other for whatever reason. She pushed me, I stumbled and fell on my butt...

Allegedly, all I did was laugh, smile, and shove her down the slide as hard as I could. It was only like three feet off the ground, but still.

I was fun!

[saltovergray]

Apparently my mom and my aunts were sitting at a park bench while I was at the playground or something, and I came over to them and they showed me a caterpillar on the ground. I was excited at first, then I stomped it repeatedly, much to the dismay of my mother.

Not all that much of a story, but any exciting story of my early childhood involving me I clearly remember. I do remember my dad vaguely telling me about his adventures in various Eastern European countries, both on work trips and just because he wanted to go.

[Atlas]

Apparently when I was about 3 all I did was sing, instead of talking like a normal kid I would sing almost everything.

[Natick]

my mother chased down a purse snatcher and beat the shit out of him when she was living in new york once

[Mattylew]

Mom told me a story from when she was pregnant. Dad and her were redecorating our house, and one night she was home alone, she went sleepwalking. My mom went outside and climbed a ladder in her sleep, then started painting. When she woke up the next day, her hands were all red, and so were her clothes. She went to the kitchen, and noticed that the sink was all red as well! She told me that she first believed the red color was blood, but soon found out that it was red paint.

Since I was in her belly, I can't say I remember this, but it's sort of a weird story.

[Earfetish]

I remember once taking a shit in a park in London in the summertime - dropped my trousers, went to a shady tree and took a dump. Loads of flies came. I also didn't wipe and there was shit all over my pants.

[Jester]

At 11/11/13 12:26 PM, Natick wrote: my mother chased down a purse snatcher and beat the shit out of him when she was living in new york once

Shit, my mom also beat the shit out of a purse snatcher in New York. He pulled a gun on her though, so she just kinda left I guess.

[Earfetish]

At 11/11/13 12:23 PM, J-Rex wrote: Apparently when I was about 3 all I did was sing, instead of talking like a normal kid I would sing almost everything.

I used to call everything 'Healey Dell', a woodland area in Rochdale. I guess I liked the name of it. I'd be like, "Are we at Healey Dell yet?' 'Daddy, can you come upstairs and wipe Healey Dell'?

[Atlas]

At 11/11/13 12:54 PM, Earfetish wrote: I used to call everything 'Healey Dell', a woodland area in Rochdale. I guess I liked the name of it. I'd be like, "Are we at Healey Dell yet?' 'Daddy, can you come upstairs and wipe Healey Dell'?

That's kinda weird but I guess we are all weird as little kids.

[Wunderbar]

we were visiting family in scotland when i was around 2 or 3 and a staff member at the local nursery asked my mother to remove me because i had an england shirt on, and it made the other children feel uncomfortable or something.

it sounds ridiculous but you never really know with scots.

[Earfetish]

At 11/11/13 12:58 PM, J-Rex wrote: That's kinda weird but I guess we are all weird as little kids.

I also always used to grab my nutsack. Also I used to act like I was a television presenter and there were hidden cameras in the room when I was by myself, and I used to blame things on 'Mr Nobody' when I was naughty. And I sucked my thumb in bed until I was like 7. Also my foreskin (uncircumcised) fully retracted for the first time when I was about 17, although I think it retracted once before when I was a small child and I had to go to the doctor.

Picture of me grabbing my nutsack as a child: