At 3/7/14 04:12 AM, NeonSpider wrote: I wish for an undead all-powerful sorcerer to be my personal slave and to do my personal bidding.

Granted, but when he gets sick of being a slave, well... you're fucked.

I wish to be fucked.

At 3/7/14 09:54 AM, SolXeroEraser wrote: I wish for less awesomeness in my alone time.

Granted, your life is boring.

I wish my wish hadn't been skipped.

At 3/8/14 09:11 AM, Vinnyy wrote: I wish my heart didn't skip a beat.

Granted, but now it beats too much and you die of, I don't know, there must be some disease for that.

I wish I could get a successful career as a comedian.

At 3/8/14 10:10 AM, Ericho wrote:

At 3/8/14 09:11 AM, Vinnyy wrote: I wish my heart didn't skip a beat.

Granted, but now it beats too much and you die of, I don't know, there must be some disease for that.

I wish I could get a successful career as a comedian.

Granted, but the only "successful" career is in Hell, where you burning alive brings laughter to all Demons.

I wish my wish was actually a legit wish...

At 3/8/14 12:03 PM, AkatsukiDeath wrote:

I wish my wish was actually a legit wish...

Granted. but the only thing you could wish for was green apple sauce
I wish @TomFlup would make a wish

At 3/8/14 03:44 PM, Maltos wrote:

At 3/8/14 12:03 PM, AkatsukiDeath wrote:

I wish my wish was actually a legit wish...

Granted. but the only thing you could wish for was green apple sauce
I wish @TomFlup would make a wish

he wishes that you hadnt made that post
i wish for a 1999 dodge neon

At 3/8/14 02:32 PM, Addict wrote: I wish for this to be my theme song when I awake each morning.

Granted, you soon get sick of it.

At 3/8/14 11:52 PM, UFO3240 wrote: i wish for a 1999 dodge neon

Granted, you crash it and die.

I wish I could drive.

At 3/9/14 10:46 AM, NewgroundsMike wrote: I wish I could drive.

You can drive, but you do it uh, badly. I think that qualifies as being able to drive, right?

I wish I had no acne.

At 3/9/14 01:22 PM, Vinnyy wrote:

At 3/9/14 11:09 AM, Ericho wrote:

At 3/9/14 10:46 AM, NewgroundsMike wrote: I wish I could drive.

You can drive, but you do it uh, badly. I think that qualifies as being able to drive, right?

I wish I had no acne.

Granted. You now have AIDS.

I wish there were no more diseases in the world.

Granted, but you die in an accident.

I wish I could think of something more creative.

At 3/9/14 01:44 PM, NewgroundsMike wrote:

I wish I could think of something more creative.

Granted. But the Mods delete it
I wish someone would make facebook die

At 3/9/14 03:36 PM, Maltos wrote:

At 3/9/14 01:44 PM, NewgroundsMike wrote:

I wish I could think of something more creative.

Granted. But the Mods delete it
I wish someone would make facebook die

Granted, iTunes makes a social site to commpete with google+ and reinforces it on everyone.

I wish I could win a ng bbs award.

At 3/9/14 03:43 PM, WiiFittoToreinaa wrote:

At 3/9/14 03:36 PM, Maltos wrote:

At 3/9/14 01:44 PM, NewgroundsMike wrote:

I wish I could think of something more creative.

Granted. But the Mods delete it
I wish someone would make facebook die

Granted, iTunes makes a social site to commpete with google+ and reinforces it on everyone.

I wish I could win a ng bbs award.

Granted. It's a negative award that makes everybody hate you.

I wish I had more gum.

At 3/9/14 06:25 PM, Protoman1337 wrote:

I wish I had more gum.

Granted, but you accidentally choke to death on the gum

I wish I was plat in LoL

At 3/9/14 06:46 PM, beakerboy wrote:

At 3/9/14 06:25 PM, Protoman1337 wrote:

I wish I had more gum.

Granted, but you accidentally choke to death on the gum

I wish I was plat in LoL

Granted. Your computer crashes or something.

I wish that I could actually beat Lunatic mode in Fire Emblem: Awakening

At 3/9/14 06:46 PM, beakerboy wrote:

At 3/9/14 06:25 PM, Protoman1337 wrote:

I wish I had more gum.

Granted, but you accidentally choke to death on the gum

I wish I was plat in LoL

i don't know what that is but fuck it you are raped everyday

i wish there a mod for a day event

At 3/9/14 06:49 PM, kazumazkan wrote:

At 3/9/14 06:46 PM, beakerboy wrote:

At 3/9/14 06:25 PM, Protoman1337 wrote:

I wish I had more gum.

Granted, but you accidentally choke to death on the gum

I wish I was plat in LoL

i don't know what that is but fuck it you are raped everyday

i wish there a mod for a day event

Granted. It ends up destroying the site due to everybody banning each other and all topics being locked forever.

I wish for an orange cat with buck teeth.

At 3/9/14 06:48 PM, Protoman1337 wrote: I wish that I could actually beat Lunatic mode in Fire Emblem: Awakening

Granted, you no longer have a life.

At 3/9/14 07:00 PM, Protoman1337 wrote: I wish for an orange cat with buck teeth.

Granted, it kills you in your sleep.

I wish to see it do that.

At 3/10/14 09:24 AM, NewgroundsMike wrote:

At 3/9/14 06:48 PM, Protoman1337 wrote: I wish that I could actually beat Lunatic mode in Fire Emblem: Awakening

Granted, you no longer have a life.

At 3/9/14 07:00 PM, Protoman1337 wrote: I wish for an orange cat with buck teeth.

Granted, it kills you in your sleep.

I wish to see it do that.

It looks at you so viciosly YOU FREAKING DIE
i wish for a rally car

At 3/10/14 12:30 PM, UFO3240 wrote: i wish for a rally car

Granted, you crash and die.

I wish not to crash my car.

At 3/10/14 01:52 PM, Slacker013 wrote:

At 3/10/14 01:33 PM, NewgroundsMike wrote:

At 3/10/14 12:30 PM, UFO3240 wrote: i wish for a rally car

Granted, you crash and die.

I wish not to crash my car.

Granted, UFO wrecks into your car and dies in the big ball of fire. Lucky you had to take a piss...

I wish every time I said "Kamikaze" someone would go ballistic, killing themselves and another... or at least property damage.

Granted, the first time you do, it's the guy right next to you going kamikaze, and you are killed.

I wish I could stare people to death.

you get talked to death i wish for an army of animate rally cars thats loyal and invincible

At 3/10/14 02:31 PM, Vinnyy wrote:

At 3/10/14 01:58 PM, NewgroundsMike wrote:
I wish I could stare people to death.

Granted. You look into a mirror and stare yourself to death.

I wish someone could talk to me.

Granted. Everyone *can* talk to you but no one does.

I wish I had a rabbit in a hat with a bat and a six four Impala.

At 3/10/14 02:41 PM, Clamstuffer wrote: I wish I had a rabbit in a hat with a bat and a six four Impala.

Granted, but it's dead.

I wish for cooked rabbit.

At 3/10/14 03:04 PM, NewgroundsMike wrote:

At 3/10/14 02:41 PM, Clamstuffer wrote: I wish I had a rabbit in a hat with a bat and a six four Impala.

Granted, but it's dead.

I wish for cooked rabbit.

Granted but before you can eat it you get ran over by UFO3240's invincible car army. Then they accidentally run over him too.

I wish life was porn instead of drama.

At 3/10/14 03:19 PM, Vinnyy wrote:

At 3/10/14 03:04 PM, NewgroundsMike wrote:

At 3/10/14 02:41 PM, Clamstuffer wrote: I wish I had a rabbit in a hat with a bat and a six four Impala.

Granted, but it's dead.

I wish for cooked rabbit.

Granted, but it comes back as a zombie and kills you.

I wish for a slap across the face.

Granted, you get slapped in the face with a dick because of what I wished before that.

At 3/10/14 03:19 PM, Clamstuffer wrote: I wish life was porn instead of drama.

Granted, you're the cameraman. You are not fucked, and you can't even jerk off without it looking shit.

I wish life didn't suck.

At 3/11/14 11:20 AM, NewgroundsMike wrote:

At 3/10/14 03:19 PM, Clamstuffer wrote: I wish life was porn instead of drama.

Granted, you're the cameraman. You are not fucked, and you can't even jerk off without it looking shit.

I wish life didn't suck.

Granted, but you only get to enjoy it for a week before your cancer takes its toll.

I wish I had my dream job.

At 3/11/14 12:02 PM, Zhon wrote:

At 3/11/14 11:20 AM, NewgroundsMike wrote:

At 3/10/14 03:19 PM, Clamstuffer wrote: I wish life was porn instead of drama.

Granted, you're the cameraman. You are not fucked, and you can't even jerk off without it looking shit.

I wish life didn't suck.

Granted, but you only get to enjoy it for a week before your cancer takes its toll.

I wish I had my dream job.

Granted, but you get fired after one day.

I wish I had a job that I liked that I never could be fired from.

At 3/11/14 02:30 PM, Vinnyy wrote:

At 3/11/14 02:08 PM, NewgroundsMike wrote:
I wish I had a job that I liked that I never could be fired from.

Granted, but you get no pay.

I wish I could take something from someone.

Granted, you're imprisoned for theft.

I wish someone would give me something.

At 3/11/14 02:40 PM, Slacker013 wrote:

At 3/11/14 02:33 PM, NewgroundsMike wrote:

I wish someone would give me something.

Granted, sperm is free and you've got a stomach full!

I wish the moon was a shade of purple... not like a purple and more like a purple...

Granted, but the moon transforms into a person - a giant person, who then proceeds to invade the Earth and crush you under its foot.

I wish for infinite wishes.