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Corrupt a wish!

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DamnedByFate
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Response to Corrupt a wish! 2013-03-28 06:47:21

At 3/28/13 05:25 AM, VJF wrote:
At 3/28/13 03:13 AM, slipstrike wrote: I wish everyone had time fo' dat.
Everyone has time for everything they need to get done, and after getting everything done in the world, people become extremely bored and suicide rates sky rocket.

I wish pollution was all gone.

Granted, but wars won't end.

I wish for drum lessons with some famous drummer.


You can't fight for peace. If you fight, there ain't peace. NO, I'M NOT AMERICAN!
On every ship that floats and sails, there's someone who the captain nails.
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CrunkOnASwag
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Response to Corrupt a wish! 2013-03-28 07:17:02

At 3/28/13 06:47 AM, NewgroundsMike wrote: I wish for drum lessons with some famous drummer.

You get lessons from Rick Allen, the drummer from Def Leppard, and Lesson #1 is to amputate your left arm.

I wish my apartment was clean.


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VJF
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Response to Corrupt a wish! 2013-03-28 07:20:00

At 3/28/13 07:17 AM, TurkeyOnAStick wrote: I wish my apartment was clean.

Granted. You win a week of free maid service, but as she's cleaning your apartment, she finds a dead hooker under all the mess and you spnd the rest of your life in jail after she calls the police.

I wish I had better vision.


"You're a bit of a ghoul - aren't you?"---ZeroAsALimit.

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ManiacCop2
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Response to Corrupt a wish! 2013-03-28 07:42:16

At 3/28/13 07:20 AM, VJF wrote:
At 3/28/13 07:17 AM, TurkeyOnAStick wrote: I wish my apartment was clean.
Granted. You win a week of free maid service, but as she's cleaning your apartment, she finds a dead hooker under all the mess and you spnd the rest of your life in jail after she calls the police.

I wish I had better vision.

Wish granted you now have better vision unfortunately your vision is now so good you can see all the various bits of dirt and bacteria that fester on peoples skins and on your food and drink. This result in you developing OCD.

I wish I had a lot of Money


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VJF
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Response to Corrupt a wish! 2013-03-28 07:46:00

At 3/28/13 07:42 AM, ManiacCop2 wrote: I wish I had a lot of Money

Granted. Your mother dies and leaves you 5,000 dollars in her will.

I wish I could read peoples' minds.


"You're a bit of a ghoul - aren't you?"---ZeroAsALimit.

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ManiacCop2
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Response to Corrupt a wish! 2013-03-28 07:51:11

At 3/28/13 07:46 AM, VJF wrote:
At 3/28/13 07:42 AM, ManiacCop2 wrote: I wish I had a lot of Money
Granted. Your mother dies and leaves you 5,000 dollars in her will.

I wish I could read peoples' minds.

Granted unfortunately for you everyone is aware that you can read their minds and you end up being socially ostracized

I wish I was Telekinetic


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DamnedByFate
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Response to Corrupt a wish! 2013-03-28 07:51:28

At 3/28/13 07:46 AM, VJF wrote:
At 3/28/13 07:42 AM, ManiacCop2 wrote: I wish I had a lot of Money
Granted. Your mother dies and leaves you 5,000 dollars in her will.

I wish I could read peoples' minds.

You can, and you discover they all hate you.

I wish I didn't need glasses.


You can't fight for peace. If you fight, there ain't peace. NO, I'M NOT AMERICAN!
On every ship that floats and sails, there's someone who the captain nails.
Sig by Decky.

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VJF
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Response to Corrupt a wish! 2013-03-28 08:24:32

At 3/28/13 07:51 AM, ManiacCop2 wrote: I wish I was Telekinetic

Granted, but the only useful job you can find for it is to travel the country using it in Barnum and Bailey's circus.

At 3/28/13 07:51 AM, NewgroundsMike wrote: I wish I didn't need glasses.

Granted. You are now blind and have to use cool sunglasses instead.

I wish I had a better MP3 player.


"You're a bit of a ghoul - aren't you?"---ZeroAsALimit.

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Dawcio510
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Response to Corrupt a wish! 2013-03-28 08:29:21

I wish to have better computer


"I fapped to this topic."
- Razeroath.

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ManiacCop2
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Response to Corrupt a wish! 2013-03-28 08:41:16

At 3/28/13 08:24 AM, VJF wrote:
At 3/28/13 07:51 AM, ManiacCop2 wrote: I wish I was Telekinetic
Granted, but the only useful job you can find for it is to travel the country using it in Barnum and Bailey's circus.

At 3/28/13 07:51 AM, NewgroundsMike wrote: I wish I didn't need glasses.
Granted. You are now blind and have to use cool sunglasses instead.

I wish I had a better MP3 player.

Wish granted your MP3 player is now so good you're physically unable to stop listening to it which results in you, in a dazed state, accidentally walking out in front of a bus.

I wish I could travel through time.


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VJF
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Response to Corrupt a wish! 2013-03-28 08:45:38

At 3/28/13 08:41 AM, ManiacCop2 wrote: I wish I could travel through time.

Granted. You travel through time, messing with history so much that Germany and Japan won WWII, and after splitting up the world, the Germans attack Japan causing WWIII, and pretty much destroy the world.

I wish today was Friday so I could get my paycheck.


"You're a bit of a ghoul - aren't you?"---ZeroAsALimit.

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DamnedByFate
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Response to Corrupt a wish! 2013-03-28 10:05:39

At 3/28/13 08:24 AM, VJF wrote:
At 3/28/13 07:51 AM, NewgroundsMike wrote: I wish I didn't need glasses.
Granted. You are now blind and have to use cool sunglasses instead.

Why the hell did I expect this?

At 3/28/13 08:29 AM, Dawcio510 wrote: I wish to have better computer

Granted, but now your computer is so good it makes the CIA jealous and they have you assassinated.

At 3/28/13 08:45 AM, VJF wrote:
At 3/28/13 08:41 AM, ManiacCop2 wrote: I wish I could travel through time.
Granted. You travel through time, messing with history so much that Germany and Japan won WWII, and after splitting up the world, the Germans attack Japan causing WWIII, and pretty much destroy the world.

I wish today was Friday so I could get my paycheck.

You get your paycheck. It says $0.

I wish I had an angel (and anyone who doesn't get that joke owes me a beer).


You can't fight for peace. If you fight, there ain't peace. NO, I'M NOT AMERICAN!
On every ship that floats and sails, there's someone who the captain nails.
Sig by Decky.

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VJF
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Response to Corrupt a wish! 2013-03-28 10:31:14

At 3/28/13 10:05 AM, NewgroundsMike wrote: I wish I had an angel (and anyone who doesn't get that joke owes me a beer).

Granted. You get your angel, but since hardly anyone gets the joke, you consume so many beers that other people buy for you that you forget where you left your angel and never see it again.

I wish I could go to sleep when I want to. Insomnia really sucks.


"You're a bit of a ghoul - aren't you?"---ZeroAsALimit.

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DamnedByFate
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Response to Corrupt a wish! 2013-03-28 10:53:14

At 3/28/13 10:31 AM, VJF wrote: I wish I could go to sleep when I want to. Insomnia really sucks.

You go to sleep but never awake again.

I wish someone died.


You can't fight for peace. If you fight, there ain't peace. NO, I'M NOT AMERICAN!
On every ship that floats and sails, there's someone who the captain nails.
Sig by Decky.

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VJF
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Response to Corrupt a wish! 2013-03-28 11:00:59

At 3/28/13 10:53 AM, NewgroundsMike wrote:
At 3/28/13 10:31 AM, VJF wrote: I wish I could go to sleep when I want to. Insomnia really sucks.
You go to sleep but never awake again.

I wish someone died.

Because I never wake up again, you get your wish and I died. My ghost is now typing my posts.

Hey look ma, I'm a Ghost Writer (weird show, look it up).

I wish my cat would stop eating my dogs food.


"You're a bit of a ghoul - aren't you?"---ZeroAsALimit.

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DamnedByFate
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Response to Corrupt a wish! 2013-03-28 11:48:04

At 3/28/13 11:00 AM, VJF wrote: I wish my cat would stop eating my dogs food.

It starts eating your food instead.

I wish I was a mod on NG.


You can't fight for peace. If you fight, there ain't peace. NO, I'M NOT AMERICAN!
On every ship that floats and sails, there's someone who the captain nails.
Sig by Decky.

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Cyberdevil
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Response to Corrupt a wish! 2013-03-28 15:03:39

At 3/28/13 11:48 AM, NewgroundsMike wrote: It starts eating your food instead.

I wish I was a mod on NG.

You get modded. You accidentally ban a mod; an admin perma-bans you.

I wish pizzas were twice as big by default.

VJF
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Response to Corrupt a wish! 2013-03-28 23:45:33

At 3/28/13 03:04 PM, Amaranthus wrote: I wish for my own TARDIS.

Granted. You now own your own TARDIS, but it somehow become too complicated for you, so you have to trade it in for a RETARDIS.

I wish people wouldn't let this thread die.


"You're a bit of a ghoul - aren't you?"---ZeroAsALimit.

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Phobotech
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Response to Corrupt a wish! 2013-03-29 01:36:12

At 3/28/13 11:45 PM, VJF wrote:
I wish people wouldn't let this thread die.

The thread outlives us all when the asteroid hits.

I wish I had some Taco Bell right now.


"I sail through a golden nexus. By tanks with armor that glisten. I watch and I play with creations, and what I'm not reading, I listen." <-

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CresIsis
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Response to Corrupt a wish! 2013-03-29 01:38:49

At 3/29/13 01:36 AM, Phobotech wrote: I wish I had some Taco Bell right now.

Granted but you get constipated as fuuuuuck.

I wish people would start using candlejack aga


~Sweet memories of us I do recall~
~Dear angel please come back before I fall~

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VJF
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Response to Corrupt a wish! 2013-03-29 01:52:48

At 3/29/13 01:38 AM, CresIsis wrote:
At 3/29/13 01:36 AM, Phobotech wrote: I wish I had some Taco Bell right now.
Granted but you get constipated as fuuuuuck.

I wish people would start using candlejack aga

Granted. People start using Candlejack again and someo

I wish I had some fireworks right now I could blow up.


"You're a bit of a ghoul - aren't you?"---ZeroAsALimit.

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VJF
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Response to Corrupt a wish! 2013-03-29 02:06:58

At 3/29/13 01:57 AM, hecticjon wrote: ALL I WANT FOR MY BIRTHDAY IS A BIG BOOTY HO

therefore i wish for one

Granted, but she suffocates you with her big booty during big booty sex, and you die with a big booty grin on your face.

I wish my nose would stop running.


"You're a bit of a ghoul - aren't you?"---ZeroAsALimit.

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homor
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Response to Corrupt a wish! 2013-03-29 02:44:35

At 3/29/13 02:06 AM, VJF wrote: I wish my nose would stop running.

Your nose has stopped running, because it was amputated by a mad scientist. Currently it's 50ft tall and destroying Milwaukee. You also can't smell shit.

I wish for another Shrek movie.


"Guns don't kill people, the government does."
- Dale Gribble
Please do not contact Homor to get your message added to this sig, there is no more room.

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VJF
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Response to Corrupt a wish! 2013-03-29 03:06:16

At 3/29/13 02:44 AM, homor wrote: I wish for another Shrek movie.

Granted but Disney decides to make it Live Action, and it flops in theaters, causing Disney to (finally) stop making Shrek films.

I wish I could control the weather.


"You're a bit of a ghoul - aren't you?"---ZeroAsALimit.

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kisame
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Response to Corrupt a wish! 2013-03-29 03:19:42

At 3/29/13 03:06 AM, VJF wrote:
At 3/29/13 02:44 AM, homor wrote: I wish for another Shrek movie.
Granted but Disney decides to make it Live Action, and it flops in theaters, causing Disney to (finally) stop making Shrek films.

I wish I could control the weather.

Granted. Except you can only produce fog and only in your immediate vicinity

I wish my sister would stop being a self destructive moron.


Science can't lie.

BURN!!!!!!!!!!!!

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CresIsis
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Response to Corrupt a wish! 2013-03-29 03:22:09

At 3/29/13 03:19 AM, kisame wrote: I wish my sister would stop being a self destructive moron.

Won't have to worry about that when she's dead *snap*

I wish for a statwhore dream. A legit deity whistle, 30,000+ B/P points, 50,000+ posts, and level 60.


~Sweet memories of us I do recall~
~Dear angel please come back before I fall~

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kisame
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Response to Corrupt a wish! 2013-03-29 03:30:50

At 3/29/13 03:22 AM, CresIsis wrote:
At 3/29/13 03:19 AM, kisame wrote: I wish my sister would stop being a self destructive moron.
Won't have to worry about that when she's dead *snap*

I wish for a statwhore dream. A legit deity whistle, 30,000+ B/P points, 50,000+ posts, and level 60.

Granted. But your account is deleted soon after.

I wish I was a Necromancer.


Science can't lie.

BURN!!!!!!!!!!!!

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VJF
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Response to Corrupt a wish! 2013-03-29 04:10:46

At 3/29/13 03:30 AM, kisame wrote: I wish I was a Necromancer.

Granted but all you can resurrect are dinosaurs, which run rampant and kill thousands of people.

I wish the next CSI episode would hurry up and air.


"You're a bit of a ghoul - aren't you?"---ZeroAsALimit.

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DamnedByFate
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Response to Corrupt a wish! 2013-03-29 06:39:23

At 3/29/13 04:10 AM, VJF wrote:
At 3/29/13 03:30 AM, kisame wrote: I wish I was a Necromancer.
Granted but all you can resurrect are dinosaurs, which run rampant and kill thousands of people.

I wish the next CSI episode would hurry up and air.

Granted, but it turns out to be absolute sh**.

I wish for some weed that I can smoke.


You can't fight for peace. If you fight, there ain't peace. NO, I'M NOT AMERICAN!
On every ship that floats and sails, there's someone who the captain nails.
Sig by Decky.

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VJF
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Response to Corrupt a wish! 2013-03-29 07:26:16

At 3/29/13 06:39 AM, NewgroundsMike wrote: I wish for some weed that I can smoke.

Granted, but it's so full of seeds and stems that you can't get high.

I wish I had a better bed.


"You're a bit of a ghoul - aren't you?"---ZeroAsALimit.

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