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At 5/11/13 12:02 PM, Scarface wrote:

At 5/11/13 11:00 AM, TheDaemonicPoet wrote: Wish granted, you play bass.

oh snap

I wish you weren't too goddamn stupid to have wished for something.

I wish Scarface would stop being such a condescending prick

At 5/11/13 12:05 PM, TheDaemonicPoet wrote: Why do you have so much hate in your heart, I never did anything to you... ):

Either play by the rules, or deal with insults.

At 5/11/13 12:04 PM, Ericho wrote: You get to watch every movie ever made.

Wish granted, but you start with the crappy ones and die before you get to the good ones.

I still wish my butt didn't hurt.

At 5/11/13 01:54 PM, kisame wrote: I wish Scarface would stop being such a condescending prick

Granted. I literally kill you with kindness.

At 5/11/13 01:54 PM, NewgroundsMike wrote: I still wish my butt didn't hurt.

Your butt feels better, but on the inside you know you'll never be the same.

I wish Hollywood writers would start putting effort into movies.

At 5/11/13 03:13 PM, Scarface wrote:
I wish Hollywood writers would start putting effort into movies.

Granted; you're put back into the early 1960s (when some of the best films were made)

At 5/11/13 06:06 PM, D-Nightmare wrote:

At 5/11/13 03:13 PM, Scarface wrote:
I wish Hollywood writers would start putting effort into movies.

Granted; you're put back into the early 1960s (when some of the best films were made)

I wish to have superhuman strength, twice as strong as I would be at my peak. Permanently.

srryfrdblepstkthxbi

At 5/11/13 06:09 PM, D-Nightmare wrote:

At 5/11/13 06:06 PM, D-Nightmare wrote:

At 5/11/13 03:13 PM, Scarface wrote:
I wish Hollywood writers would start putting effort into movies.

Granted; you're put back into the early 1960s (when some of the best films were made)

I wish to have superhuman strength, twice as strong as I would be at my peak. Permanently.

srryfrdblepstkthxbi

You are now twice as strong, unfortunatly the tension of your neck muscles severed your nerves. Causing you to end up in a weelchair.

I wish to be the best lover :3

I wish I could fly. I shall defy gravity for the rest of my entire life.

At 5/11/13 06:16 PM, BrainworkInProgress wrote: I wish to be the best lover :3

Granted. Everyone who meets you tries to rape you to experience sex with you.

At 5/11/13 06:21 PM, 3DPitDudez wrote:

I wish I could fly. I shall defy gravity for the rest of my entire life.

Granted. You get drunk and fly right into a Chuck E. Cheese, killing yourself and everyone inside.

I committed my own worst pet peeve: DON'T FORGET TO MAKE A FUCKING WISH.

I wish new music didn't sound shitty.

At 5/11/13 08:37 PM, Scarface wrote: I committed my own worst pet peeve: DON'T FORGET TO MAKE A FUCKING WISH.

I wish new music didn't sound shitty.

Granted. No there's no music at all due to everyone having different tastes in music

I wish I had both sets of genitals.

At 5/11/13 08:54 PM, kisame wrote:
I wish I had both sets of genitals.

Granted, but they are all mashed together and your urinary tract is in all kinds of fucked.

I wish to have insane robots give me a complicated brain surgery

At 5/11/13 09:13 PM, Boomstick wrote: I wish to have insane robots give me a complicated brain surgery

Granted, but they're insane, so they decide to kill you just for the fun of it.

I wish I had a sandwich.

At 5/11/13 09:29 PM, Scarface wrote:

At 5/11/13 09:13 PM, Boomstick wrote: I wish to have insane robots give me a complicated brain surgery

Granted, but they're insane, so they decide to kill you just for the fun of it.

I wish I had a sandwich.

Granted. But it's contaminated with e coli.

I wish the weather wasn't so fucking capricious.

At 5/11/13 09:33 PM, kisame wrote:
Granted. But it's contaminated with e coli.

I wish the weather wasn't so fucking capricious.

The weather is no longer capricious however it is now always snowing and 20 degrees Fahrenheit

I wish I had some alcohol

At 5/11/13 09:44 PM, beakerboy wrote: I wish I had some alcohol

Granted. You have rubbing alcohol meant for disinfecting wounds. You drink it anyway and go blind.

I wish I was a dragon.

At 5/12/13 09:31 AM, Scarface wrote: I wish I was a dragon.

You don't know how to breathe properly and thus collapse in the fire of your own lungs (hey, that could happen).

You get to meet every famous person you ever wanted to meet.

At 5/12/13 11:09 AM, Ericho wrote:

At 5/12/13 09:31 AM, Scarface wrote: I wish I was a dragon.

You don't know how to breathe properly and thus collapse in the fire of your own lungs (hey, that could happen).

You get to meet every famous person you ever wanted to meet.

The genie thought you said "meat" so he chops them up into hamburger and sends them to your house.
You go to prison for life.
I wish that 1 + 1 = 2

At 5/12/13 11:12 AM, Manly-Chicken wrote: I wish that 1 + 1 = 2

Granted. 1 + 1 = 2. However, you eventually that that was already true, and are so depressed because you wasted your wish that you decide to kill yourself.

I wish I Wolverine was my best friend.

At 5/12/13 11:15 AM, Scarface wrote:

At 5/12/13 11:12 AM, Manly-Chicken wrote: I wish that 1 + 1 = 2

Granted. 1 + 1 = 2. However, you eventually that that was already true, and are so depressed because you wasted your wish that you decide to kill yourself.

I wish I Wolverine was my best friend.

Granted. You have some drinks with him, and when both of you are wasted you get into a fight. (and I guess I don't have to explain how a fight with Wolverine will end).

I wish for something interesting to happen.

At 5/12/13 12:56 PM, NewgroundsMike wrote: I wish for something interesting to happen.

Granted. Tom Hanks bursts into your house, naked, crying and covered in cottage cheese. He is holding a gun and a rabbit. He orders you to rap the rabbit or else he'll shot you in the dick. So, you rape the rabbit, crying all the while, while Tom Hanks watches and laughs. He then takes a shit in your kitchen and jumps out the window.

I wish I had an M249. I feel like that would be fun.

At 5/12/13 02:17 PM, Scarface wrote:
I wish I had an M249. I feel like that would be fun.

You gain an M249 as a gift from a close friend who returned from a vacation in Mexico. However, it was once an instrument of Operation Fast & Furious, and The Zetas immediately knew it was a tracked gun, giving it to your friend who gave it to you.

You cherish the weapon...take it out to the range a few times, once on a camping trip, and some time passes. Suddenly, without warning, your house is stormed by the ATF. You earned a flash bang in the face, you lose the SAW, and after rigorous interrogation, you spend the next three decades under obvious government watch.

Enjoy the free entourage and surveillance.

At 5/12/13 02:59 PM, Phobotech wrote:
Enjoy the free entourage and surveillance.

I wish I immediately had 250 flight hours so I can just start working as a pilot, without having to rent costly hours from flight schools.

At 5/12/13 03:01 PM, Phobotech wrote: I wish I immediately had 250 flight hours so I can just start working as a pilot, without having to rent costly hours from flight schools.

Granted. Your flight is high jacked by terrorists who fly it into Disney World. Mickey and all his pals are dead.

I wish for world peace.

At 5/12/13 05:35 PM, Scarface wrote:
I wish for world peace.

Granted. A parasitic airborne virus eradicates all mammalian life...mankind doesn't survive for long, and the world is left at peace as our bodies decompose, returning to nature.

I wish somebody would stab me with a knife the next time I go downtown.

At 5/12/13 08:54 PM, Phobotech wrote: I wish somebody would stab me with a knife the next time I go downtown.

Granted. The knife is rusty and tetanus infected, and the last person stabbed with it had AIDS, the remains of which is still on the knife. You live through the stabbing, but in a very painful existence.

I wish I was a few inches taller.

I knew it was going to have something to do with AIDS.

At 5/12/13 09:04 PM, Scarface wrote:
I wish I was a few inches taller.

Granted, but it's mostly in your back. Slowly, gradually, the tumor eventually invades your spine, steadily pushing two vertebrates apart week after week.

The pain is gruesomely horrifying.

In the end, you gain a couple of inches on your overall height...at the trade off of your ability to walk. You're seen in your final days paralyzed, bound to a wheelchair, the tumor portruding you slightly forward from the back of the seat....but hey, at least you're taller.

I wish I found the cure for diabetes and I became rich and famous for my brilliance.

Granted, but your riches forced others to seek out a way to kill you for the knowledge.

I wish I was the owner of a major international football/soccer team.

At 5/12/13 10:09 PM, TracyJacksonTAW wrote: I wish I was the owner of a major international football/soccer team.

Granted. The team majorly sucks ass and you don't make any money with sponsorship deals. You are forced to sell the team for a handsome sum of $400.

I wish I had a dog.

At 5/13/13 06:50 AM, Scarface wrote:

At 5/12/13 10:09 PM, TracyJacksonTAW wrote: I wish I was the owner of a major international football/soccer team.

Granted. The team majorly sucks ass and you don't make any money with sponsorship deals. You are forced to sell the team for a handsome sum of $400.

I wish I had a dog.

Granted, you go to China and get served some dog meat.

I wish I could write better corruptions.

At 5/13/13 01:02 PM, NewgroundsMike wrote: I wish I could write better corruptions.

Granted. You have one talent, writing good corruptions for people's wishes, and it serves no purpose except to cause pain and disappointment in the world. You're a big piece of shit.

I wish more than three or four people would post in this thread.