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Corrupt a wish!

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kisame
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Response to Corrupt a wish! 2013-05-11 13:54:32 Reply

At 5/11/13 12:02 PM, Scarface wrote:
At 5/11/13 11:00 AM, TheDaemonicPoet wrote: Wish granted, you play bass.

oh snap
I wish you weren't too goddamn stupid to have wished for something.

I wish Scarface would stop being such a condescending prick


Science can't lie.

BURN!!!!!!!!!!!!

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NewgroundsMike
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Response to Corrupt a wish! 2013-05-11 13:54:32 Reply

At 5/11/13 12:05 PM, TheDaemonicPoet wrote: Why do you have so much hate in your heart, I never did anything to you... ):

Either play by the rules, or deal with insults.

At 5/11/13 12:04 PM, Ericho wrote: You get to watch every movie ever made.

Wish granted, but you start with the crappy ones and die before you get to the good ones.

I still wish my butt didn't hurt.


You can't fight for peace. If you fight, there ain't peace.
NO, I'M NOT AMERICAN!
Click here if you want to be my dinner!

Scarface
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Response to Corrupt a wish! 2013-05-11 15:13:38 Reply

At 5/11/13 01:54 PM, kisame wrote: I wish Scarface would stop being such a condescending prick

Granted. I literally kill you with kindness.

At 5/11/13 01:54 PM, NewgroundsMike wrote: I still wish my butt didn't hurt.

Your butt feels better, but on the inside you know you'll never be the same.

I wish Hollywood writers would start putting effort into movies.


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D-Nightmare
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Response to Corrupt a wish! 2013-05-11 18:06:05 Reply

At 5/11/13 03:13 PM, Scarface wrote:
I wish Hollywood writers would start putting effort into movies.

Granted; you're put back into the early 1960s (when some of the best films were made)


I am not a poet, and I do not intend to be.
I just wanted to post so you do not forget me.

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D-Nightmare
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Response to Corrupt a wish! 2013-05-11 18:09:17 Reply

At 5/11/13 06:06 PM, D-Nightmare wrote:
At 5/11/13 03:13 PM, Scarface wrote:
I wish Hollywood writers would start putting effort into movies.
Granted; you're put back into the early 1960s (when some of the best films were made)

I wish to have superhuman strength, twice as strong as I would be at my peak. Permanently.

srryfrdblepstkthxbi

I am not a poet, and I do not intend to be.
I just wanted to post so you do not forget me.

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BrainworkInProgress
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Response to Corrupt a wish! 2013-05-11 18:16:35 Reply

At 5/11/13 06:09 PM, D-Nightmare wrote:
At 5/11/13 06:06 PM, D-Nightmare wrote:
At 5/11/13 03:13 PM, Scarface wrote:
I wish Hollywood writers would start putting effort into movies.
Granted; you're put back into the early 1960s (when some of the best films were made)
I wish to have superhuman strength, twice as strong as I would be at my peak. Permanently.

srryfrdblepstkthxbi

You are now twice as strong, unfortunatly the tension of your neck muscles severed your nerves. Causing you to end up in a weelchair.

I wish to be the best lover :3

3DPitDudez
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Response to Corrupt a wish! 2013-05-11 18:21:32 Reply

I wish I could fly. I shall defy gravity for the rest of my entire life.


The greatest gamer in this generation, with the skills of art and writing.

" My soul is covered with the cold mind, under the warm souls around a life I conquer." -3DPitDudez

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Scarface
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Response to Corrupt a wish! 2013-05-11 20:36:16 Reply

At 5/11/13 06:16 PM, BrainworkInProgress wrote: I wish to be the best lover :3

Granted. Everyone who meets you tries to rape you to experience sex with you.

At 5/11/13 06:21 PM, 3DPitDudez wrote:
I wish I could fly. I shall defy gravity for the rest of my entire life.

Granted. You get drunk and fly right into a Chuck E. Cheese, killing yourself and everyone inside.


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Scarface
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Response to Corrupt a wish! 2013-05-11 20:37:50 Reply

I committed my own worst pet peeve: DON'T FORGET TO MAKE A FUCKING WISH.

I wish new music didn't sound shitty.


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kisame
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Response to Corrupt a wish! 2013-05-11 20:54:56 Reply

At 5/11/13 08:37 PM, Scarface wrote: I committed my own worst pet peeve: DON'T FORGET TO MAKE A FUCKING WISH.

I wish new music didn't sound shitty.

Granted. No there's no music at all due to everyone having different tastes in music

I wish I had both sets of genitals.


Science can't lie.

BURN!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Boomstick
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Response to Corrupt a wish! 2013-05-11 21:13:46 Reply

At 5/11/13 08:54 PM, kisame wrote:
I wish I had both sets of genitals.

Granted, but they are all mashed together and your urinary tract is in all kinds of fucked.

I wish to have insane robots give me a complicated brain surgery


I HДVЗИ'T ЭДTЗЙ SLICЭD ЬЯЗДD SIИCЭ I ШДS TЩЗLVЭ

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Scarface
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Response to Corrupt a wish! 2013-05-11 21:29:52 Reply

At 5/11/13 09:13 PM, Boomstick wrote: I wish to have insane robots give me a complicated brain surgery

Granted, but they're insane, so they decide to kill you just for the fun of it.

I wish I had a sandwich.


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kisame
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Response to Corrupt a wish! 2013-05-11 21:33:42 Reply

At 5/11/13 09:29 PM, Scarface wrote:
At 5/11/13 09:13 PM, Boomstick wrote: I wish to have insane robots give me a complicated brain surgery
Granted, but they're insane, so they decide to kill you just for the fun of it.

I wish I had a sandwich.

Granted. But it's contaminated with e coli.

I wish the weather wasn't so fucking capricious.


Science can't lie.

BURN!!!!!!!!!!!!

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beakerboy
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Response to Corrupt a wish! 2013-05-11 21:44:25 Reply

At 5/11/13 09:33 PM, kisame wrote:
Granted. But it's contaminated with e coli.

I wish the weather wasn't so fucking capricious.

The weather is no longer capricious however it is now always snowing and 20 degrees Fahrenheit

I wish I had some alcohol


I have a strong personality, so bite me.

Scarface
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Response to Corrupt a wish! 2013-05-12 09:31:47 Reply

At 5/11/13 09:44 PM, beakerboy wrote: I wish I had some alcohol

Granted. You have rubbing alcohol meant for disinfecting wounds. You drink it anyway and go blind.

I wish I was a dragon.


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Ericho
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Response to Corrupt a wish! 2013-05-12 11:09:36 Reply

At 5/12/13 09:31 AM, Scarface wrote: I wish I was a dragon.

You don't know how to breathe properly and thus collapse in the fire of your own lungs (hey, that could happen).

You get to meet every famous person you ever wanted to meet.


You know the world's gone crazy when the best rapper's a white guy and the best golfer's a black guy - Chris Rock

Manly-Chicken
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Response to Corrupt a wish! 2013-05-12 11:12:11 Reply

At 5/12/13 11:09 AM, Ericho wrote:
At 5/12/13 09:31 AM, Scarface wrote: I wish I was a dragon.
You don't know how to breathe properly and thus collapse in the fire of your own lungs (hey, that could happen).

You get to meet every famous person you ever wanted to meet.

The genie thought you said "meat" so he chops them up into hamburger and sends them to your house.
You go to prison for life.
I wish that 1 + 1 = 2


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Scarface
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Response to Corrupt a wish! 2013-05-12 11:15:25 Reply

At 5/12/13 11:12 AM, Manly-Chicken wrote: I wish that 1 + 1 = 2

Granted. 1 + 1 = 2. However, you eventually that that was already true, and are so depressed because you wasted your wish that you decide to kill yourself.

I wish I Wolverine was my best friend.


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NewgroundsMike
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Response to Corrupt a wish! 2013-05-12 12:56:32 Reply

At 5/12/13 11:15 AM, Scarface wrote:
At 5/12/13 11:12 AM, Manly-Chicken wrote: I wish that 1 + 1 = 2
Granted. 1 + 1 = 2. However, you eventually that that was already true, and are so depressed because you wasted your wish that you decide to kill yourself.

I wish I Wolverine was my best friend.

Granted. You have some drinks with him, and when both of you are wasted you get into a fight. (and I guess I don't have to explain how a fight with Wolverine will end).

I wish for something interesting to happen.


You can't fight for peace. If you fight, there ain't peace.
NO, I'M NOT AMERICAN!
Click here if you want to be my dinner!

Scarface
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Response to Corrupt a wish! 2013-05-12 14:17:37 Reply

At 5/12/13 12:56 PM, NewgroundsMike wrote: I wish for something interesting to happen.

Granted. Tom Hanks bursts into your house, naked, crying and covered in cottage cheese. He is holding a gun and a rabbit. He orders you to rap the rabbit or else he'll shot you in the dick. So, you rape the rabbit, crying all the while, while Tom Hanks watches and laughs. He then takes a shit in your kitchen and jumps out the window.

I wish I had an M249. I feel like that would be fun.


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Phobotech
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Response to Corrupt a wish! 2013-05-12 14:59:32 Reply

At 5/12/13 02:17 PM, Scarface wrote:
I wish I had an M249. I feel like that would be fun.

You gain an M249 as a gift from a close friend who returned from a vacation in Mexico. However, it was once an instrument of Operation Fast & Furious, and The Zetas immediately knew it was a tracked gun, giving it to your friend who gave it to you.

You cherish the weapon...take it out to the range a few times, once on a camping trip, and some time passes. Suddenly, without warning, your house is stormed by the ATF. You earned a flash bang in the face, you lose the SAW, and after rigorous interrogation, you spend the next three decades under obvious government watch.

Enjoy the free entourage and surveillance.


"I sail through a golden nexus. By tanks with armor that glisten. I watch and I play with creations, and what I'm not reading, I listen." <-

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Phobotech
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Response to Corrupt a wish! 2013-05-12 15:01:27 Reply

At 5/12/13 02:59 PM, Phobotech wrote:
Enjoy the free entourage and surveillance.

I wish I immediately had 250 flight hours so I can just start working as a pilot, without having to rent costly hours from flight schools.


"I sail through a golden nexus. By tanks with armor that glisten. I watch and I play with creations, and what I'm not reading, I listen." <-

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Scarface
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Response to Corrupt a wish! 2013-05-12 17:35:38 Reply

At 5/12/13 03:01 PM, Phobotech wrote: I wish I immediately had 250 flight hours so I can just start working as a pilot, without having to rent costly hours from flight schools.

Granted. Your flight is high jacked by terrorists who fly it into Disney World. Mickey and all his pals are dead.

I wish for world peace.


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Phobotech
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Response to Corrupt a wish! 2013-05-12 20:54:53 Reply

At 5/12/13 05:35 PM, Scarface wrote:
I wish for world peace.

Granted. A parasitic airborne virus eradicates all mammalian life...mankind doesn't survive for long, and the world is left at peace as our bodies decompose, returning to nature.

I wish somebody would stab me with a knife the next time I go downtown.


"I sail through a golden nexus. By tanks with armor that glisten. I watch and I play with creations, and what I'm not reading, I listen." <-

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Scarface
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Response to Corrupt a wish! 2013-05-12 21:04:43 Reply

At 5/12/13 08:54 PM, Phobotech wrote: I wish somebody would stab me with a knife the next time I go downtown.

Granted. The knife is rusty and tetanus infected, and the last person stabbed with it had AIDS, the remains of which is still on the knife. You live through the stabbing, but in a very painful existence.

I wish I was a few inches taller.


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Phobotech
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Response to Corrupt a wish! 2013-05-12 21:48:44 Reply

I knew it was going to have something to do with AIDS.

At 5/12/13 09:04 PM, Scarface wrote:
I wish I was a few inches taller.

Granted, but it's mostly in your back. Slowly, gradually, the tumor eventually invades your spine, steadily pushing two vertebrates apart week after week.

The pain is gruesomely horrifying.

In the end, you gain a couple of inches on your overall height...at the trade off of your ability to walk. You're seen in your final days paralyzed, bound to a wheelchair, the tumor portruding you slightly forward from the back of the seat....but hey, at least you're taller.

I wish I found the cure for diabetes and I became rich and famous for my brilliance.


"I sail through a golden nexus. By tanks with armor that glisten. I watch and I play with creations, and what I'm not reading, I listen." <-

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TracyJacksonTAW
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Response to Corrupt a wish! 2013-05-12 22:09:39 Reply

Granted, but your riches forced others to seek out a way to kill you for the knowledge.

I wish I was the owner of a major international football/soccer team.


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Scarface
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Response to Corrupt a wish! 2013-05-13 06:50:04 Reply

At 5/12/13 10:09 PM, TracyJacksonTAW wrote: I wish I was the owner of a major international football/soccer team.

Granted. The team majorly sucks ass and you don't make any money with sponsorship deals. You are forced to sell the team for a handsome sum of $400.

I wish I had a dog.


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Response to Corrupt a wish! 2013-05-13 13:02:26 Reply

At 5/13/13 06:50 AM, Scarface wrote:
At 5/12/13 10:09 PM, TracyJacksonTAW wrote: I wish I was the owner of a major international football/soccer team.
Granted. The team majorly sucks ass and you don't make any money with sponsorship deals. You are forced to sell the team for a handsome sum of $400.

I wish I had a dog.

Granted, you go to China and get served some dog meat.

I wish I could write better corruptions.


You can't fight for peace. If you fight, there ain't peace.
NO, I'M NOT AMERICAN!
Click here if you want to be my dinner!

Scarface
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Response to Corrupt a wish! 2013-05-17 06:21:05 Reply

At 5/13/13 01:02 PM, NewgroundsMike wrote: I wish I could write better corruptions.

Granted. You have one talent, writing good corruptions for people's wishes, and it serves no purpose except to cause pain and disappointment in the world. You're a big piece of shit.

I wish more than three or four people would post in this thread.


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