At 7/1/14 08:10 PM, creepystalkerperson2 wrote:
granted you are now highly suicidal because of what you saw and heard

Because you failed to make a wish, you are the first of my victims but you aren't granted death...you live an eternity of agony.

At 7/1/14 08:18 PM, TheGamechanger wrote: I wish that all of existence ended, including ourselves, with our only hope being Big the Cat.

Because you failed to corrupt a wish, you are corralled in with creepystalkerperson2. Sometimes you both wake up in the middle of the night and beat each other...on several occasions there's a stabbing...many times, a buttfucking or a mouth rape. You two are perfect companions to each other's, erm..."rehabilitation" program...locked away in an echo-chamber of insanity.

Granted, the existence that we knew has ended, but a fresh one begins a new at no loss of life. No dramatic change, but a harmony of subtle differences that largely go unnoticed. For what had been was let go to achieve what could be, the hope that was Big the Cat enlightened a handful, and went by largely unnoticed by the many. Nothing of consequence was lost or gained....except, either you or creepystalkerperson2 discovered, through each other, y'all like it in the butt or the mouth...make a wish, or corrupt the one that precedes you next time.

I wish I had the ability to perfectly mimic ANY noise and song emulating any sound at any volume perfectly, effortlessly.

At 7/1/14 08:33 PM, Phobotech wrote:

I wish I had the ability to perfectly mimic ANY noise and song emulating any sound at any volume perfectly, effortlessly.

Granted. After a star making role in the re-booted Police Academy series you're unfairly pigeon holed and never able to sell your screenplay about the guy who mimics sounds to fight the nazis. The Oscar is forever outside your grasp. You become the new sad Leo.

I wish for a nice but affordable set of D&D dice.

At 7/1/14 08:50 PM, Jojo55 wrote:
I wish for a freshly-baked cherry pie.

Granted. It's like one of those $1.00 gas station bullshit pies, but hey, at least it's a fresh one.

I wish for fluent memorization of whole almanacs of modern knowledge to secure my path in becoming an unbeatable debate champion.

At 7/1/14 08:54 PM, Phobotech wrote:
I wish for fluent memorization of whole almanacs of modern knowledge to secure my path in becoming an unbeatable debate champion.

Granted, but no one listens to you anymore because almanacs are boring.

I wish that I was the world's largest pizza, and that Cthulhu guarded me to prevent anyone from eating me.

At 7/1/14 09:04 PM, TheGamechanger wrote:

I wish that I was the world's largest pizza, and that Cthulhu guarded me to prevent anyone from eating me.

Granted. Drawn by the lure of the world's largest pizza many people try to eat you. TO see Cthulu is to go mad so everyone in the world goes insane and they want crazy bread, not pizza.

I wish for every nerf gun and lots of friends to use them with.

At 7/1/14 09:24 PM, stafffighter wrote:
I wish for every nerf gun and lots of friends to use them with.

Granted, but you and your friends form a small army as a result and get attacked by rebel forces.

I wish the person below me had power over the entire multiverse.

At 7/1/14 09:29 PM, TheGamechanger wrote:
I wish the person below me had power over the entire multiverse.

Granted. So does everyone...and when EVERYONE'S SUPER!!! Hahahaha....no one will be.

I wish Neil Degrasse Tyson became the President of the United States.

At 7/1/14 10:10 PM, Phobotech wrote:

At 7/1/14 09:29 PM, TheGamechanger wrote:

I wish Neil Degrasse Tyson became the President of the United States.

Granted, but now you're the Vice President.

I wish that beastality was legal.

At 7/1/14 11:36 PM, TheGamechanger wrote:
Granted, but now you're the Vice President.

I'm completely fine with this. I shouldn't be upset that the corruption was favorable, but for some reason I feel like the wish should've gone wrong somehow.

I wish that beastality was legal.

Granted. Animals evolutionary learn to rape...since animals can't consent anyway, there's nothing that prevents animals from going to town on people without consent...other animals are backed with civil rights, especially married couples whose animalia spouses are granted human rights through marital union.

Far, far down the line, horrible mutant hybrid chimaera babies start popping up, and humanity grows increasingly impotent with each new diluted generation of Beast People shambling about our towns, cities, and farmlands with carrying with them unfortunate disabilities and diseases...the furry utopia that the yiffers craved, turned out to be a more dull and grey, semi-hairless amorphous dark horror-show of zoophilia and sickness. Broken gaits supported by underdeveloped and asymmetrical limbs, weakened by internal deformaties, and their will broken by the swathes of infanticide and widespread premature deaths, sterilizations, and unwashed bodies beset with plagues and poverty. The Circus of the Modern Age claims all, in the end...we pass away to the sound of a soft and quiet breeze...not with a bang.

I wish entertainment services that promote or facilitate the cruel or unjust treatment of animals were abolished so that the animals may live happy and fulfilling lives.

At 7/1/14 11:49 PM, Phobotech wrote:
I wish entertainment services that promote or facilitate the cruel or unjust treatment of animals were abolished so that the animals may live happy and fulfilling lives.

Granted, but you can no longer watch bull-riding since it is now illegal.

I wish that an internet troll became a forum moderator.

At 7/2/14 12:59 AM, TheGamechanger wrote:

At 7/1/14 11:49 PM, Phobotech wrote:
I wish entertainment services that promote or facilitate the cruel or unjust treatment of animals were abolished so that the animals may live happy and fulfilling lives.

Granted, but you can no longer watch bull-riding since it is now illegal.

I wish that an internet troll became a forum moderator.

Granted. Its ma1achi. He ends up permabanning himself.

I wish supergandhi64 would come back.

At 7/2/14 01:02 AM, koopahermit wrote:
I wish supergandhi64 would come back.

Granted, but he knocks out and steals Malachy's username and becomes a forum moderator.

I wish the one who replies to me becomes a rule 63 Godzilla with a sticking-nukes-in-vagina fetish.

At 7/2/14 02:19 AM, TheGamechanger wrote:

At 7/2/14 01:02 AM, koopahermit wrote:
I wish supergandhi64 would come back.

Granted, but he knocks out and steals Malachy's username and becomes a forum moderator.

I wish the one who replies to me becomes a rule 63 Godzilla with a sticking-nukes-in-vagina fetish.

Granted, and I stick nukes in your mother's vagina.

I wish for the person below me to die.

At 7/2/14 06:07 AM, NewgroundsMike wrote: I wish for the person below me to die.

granted. i die 100 years later. you die tommorrow.

i wish tropical storm arthur would take a more easterly track under the steering influence of nearby trough and high pressure ridge, so the damage caused would be small.

At 7/2/14 09:43 AM, Chronamut wrote:
I wish that the show gummi bears would return to television so we can finally meet the ancient gummis.

Granted, but the ancient gummi bears rape you to death.

I wish Cthulhu was President of the United States.

At 7/2/14 09:53 AM, TheGamechanger wrote:
I wish Cthulhu was President of the United States.

Granted. We all go insane and die, dragged to a dimension of eternal pain and pleasure. A dimension of flesh and blood and screams.

I wish for the entire world to unify under a one world government, while maintaining the borders that exist today, honoring each-other's laws by treating each nation like they're Super States. Independence after mutual unity and streamlined uniformity.

At 7/2/14 01:05 PM, Phobotech wrote:
I wish for the entire world to unify under a one world government, while maintaining the borders that exist today, honoring each-other's laws by treating each nation like they're Super States. Independence after mutual unity and streamlined uniformity.

Granted. We all die of boredom from lack of conflict.

I wish I was the Pokemon Missingno.

At 7/2/14 06:34 PM, Jojo55 wrote:
I wish for my arm to become a machine gun.

Granted, but then Samus Aran rapes you out of jealousy.

I wish you had a hot Transformer girlfriend.

At 7/2/14 06:46 PM, Jojo55 wrote:

At 7/2/14 06:40 PM, TheGamechanger wrote: I wish you had a hot Transformer girlfriend.

Granted. But Samus blows her up out of jealously because she's my rapist-girlfriend now (?).

She's raping you because she's jealous of your machine-gun arm.

I wish you had a hot Transformer girlfriend.

Granted. I'll fuck her every day of my life.

I wish Justin Bieber got into a fist fight with Steven Seagal at New York's Times Square on Halloween.

At 7/2/14 06:55 PM, TheGamechanger wrote:
I wish Justin Bieber got into a fist fight with Steven Seagal at New York's Times Square on Halloween.

Granted. Justin Bieber wins and actually somehow gains respect for beating the fattened and aging Steven Seagal in a fair, one-vs-one bare-knuckle brawl. This inflates Bieber's ego enough to turn his musical career into a side-job that just pays the bills, funneling all of his money into a full-time dedicated physical fitness and martial arts training regime. Bieber trains HARD, and becomes a vilified, but successful contender in world fighting rings. Fueled by the hatred to everyone that hated him, a monster is born... an unstoppable antagonist with a fury inside him that's unleashed inside the ring that has previously been incomparable.

Way to go, Gamechanger...this is all your fault.

I wish that I had a fluent mastery of Shaolin as if I had been training with discipline for over twenty years.

At 7/2/14 07:11 PM, Phobotech wrote:
Way to go, Gamechanger...this is all your fault.

I wish that I had a fluent mastery of Shaolin as if I had been training with discipline for over twenty years.

Granted. You now work at a Shaolin noodle shop.

I wish you dated the supermodel of your choice.

At 7/2/14 07:15 PM, TheGamechanger wrote:

I wish you dated the supermodel of your choice.

Granted. He's too busy with her to revive this thread when it keeps going dead.

I wish for supreme dance skill.

At 7/2/14 09:07 PM, stafffighter wrote:
I wish for supreme dance skill.

Granted, you are now part of Monty Python's Fish Dance

I wish a black hole was created every time Steven Tyler got mad.

At 7/2/14 09:07 PM, stafffighter wrote:
I wish for supreme dance skill.

Granted. You have parkinsons disease, and you can't stop the boogie. No really, you physically can't stop the boogie.

I wish to be the funkiest man that ever was and ever will be. I wish to be so groovy, that I redefine the funk. I wish I lived, breathed, drank, ate, and slept the funk. I wish to be pure... HUH... unfiltered... UH. HEH. Bigga-boogie-woogie-funky baby...HAUH!

At 7/2/14 09:12 PM, TheGamechanger wrote:
I wish a black hole was created every time Steven Tyler got mad.

Granted. Literally nothing changes...just the naturally occurring black holes deep into the unobservably distant cosmos now have, uh, another reason for happening, I guess.

(See my wish above)

At 7/2/14 09:14 PM, Phobotech wrote:
I wish to be the funkiest man that ever was and ever will be. I wish to be so groovy, that I redefine the funk. I wish I lived, breathed, drank, ate, and slept the funk. I wish to be pure... HUH... unfiltered... UH. HEH. Bigga-boogie-woogie-funky baby...HAUH!

Granted. Now wherever you go, </iframe>">this music plays.

I wish that all moderators were Terminators.

At 7/2/14 09:14 PM, Phobotech wrote:

whoops, wrong link
miror b battle theme

At 7/2/14 09:20 PM, TheGamechanger wrote:

I wish that all moderators were Terminators.

Granted, when your shitty threads get deleted we now know why you cry, but it is something we can never do.

I wish for Planters to sell their heat peanuts in bags bigger than those single serving tubes.

At 7/2/14 10:48 PM, stafffighter wrote:
Granted, when your shitty threads get deleted we now know why you cry, but it is something we can never do.

All of my <3

I wish for Planters to sell their heat peanuts in bags bigger than those single serving tubes.

Granted. Costco and Sam's Club begin carrying absurd portions of peanuts. Needlessly large bags filled to the brim with peanuts...opening one bag carries such a concentrated smell and discharge of peanut dust, that the average human immune system can BECOME overloaded, developing an allergic reaction to peanuts. That's not how allergies work, but the magic of the thread deems the side-effect plausible.

I wish everyone who is fat simultaneously shat out their fat all at once on the first day of every month from now on.

At 7/2/14 10:48 PM, stafffighter wrote:
I wish for Planters to sell their heat peanuts in bags bigger than those single serving tubes.

Granted, but a chemical accident at the factory plant causes everybody to become permanently allergic to peanuts.

I wish you joined the Polar Bear Club