Thaaaat's right ladies and gentlemen, today marks the anniversary of the coming into this world of everybody's favorite and most well renowned connoisseur of all things bondage, InsertFunnyUserName! Our lovely mistress turns 18 on this fine day, meaning she is now legal in all 50 United States!
She'll let us know when the porno comes out.
What might we be doing to celebrate on this splendiferous day, you ask? Don't ask me you fucking dingbat, it's up to her how we're to congratulate her on her exit from the realm of jailbait. After all, we're nothing but tiny little slaves to her.
Which I'm more than totally completely ok with.
Here is where I'd normally put some of the things that I'd do to you sexually, but then I remembered 13 year olds read this site and most of what I'd write here anyway is illegal in most countries. But that's what makes it fun, right?
So buckle down, throw on a collar, dust off your chains, and practice your whip cracking, 'cause it's sure as hell gonna be an ass-slappin', dick-bangin', titty-grabbin', pussy-fillin' day of debauchery. Happy fucking birthday you sexy masochist.