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montehawks
montehawks
  • Member since: Dec. 6, 2009
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Hick Trucks 2012-02-26 21:02:48 Reply

If you're quiet and careful not to startle these fine creatures- you'll have a once in a lifetime opportunity to study a hics mount in their natural habitat. It's crucial to take all measures possible not to scare them, being timid creatures in general they wont hesitate to pepper your own personal mount with rocks and various debris caught within their rotating cylinders- also known as "wheels".

It's important to note these creatures rarely leave the side of the road, as they're usually unable to move due to internal problems caused by their operators. The most common internal problematic occurrences are the failure of the transmission. This is usually because the hic overworks his or her mount, usually more than what the poor creature can handle. Most often by "smoking", "squealing", or "spinning" the creatures cylinders.

Evidence of this can usually be seen near auto part stores that sell merchandise specific to hics, such as big gay Ford, Dodge, or Chevrolet stickers, Nightshade, big stupid Antennas and CB radios, or unsafe aftermarket lift "kits".

It's very rare to see these creatures in working condition, so it's imperative that you take the time to enjoy their magnificence. However I strongly urge you not to make eye-contact with their operators, especially while they are behind the wheel of their mount. As this usually will cause them to immediately react by seeking to keep your attention. This is almost always results in the operator fulfilling their requirement to seek attention, most commonly by urging his or her mount to go faster- which causes, in most cases, black, blinding exhaust smoke to fill the road way, coupled with the mounts roar of shame as the engine struggles to keep up with the operators commands, and inevitably, makes him or her look like a jackass.

For your safety, if you ever come upon on of these in the wild, I urge you to enjoy their presence by in no way acknowledging their existence directly. A quick look is ok, or even a quick picture of a hics mount is acceptable (just be sure the hic doesn't see, or he or she will try to seek more attention, as I stated above).

This has been a marvelous opportunity indeed, as I don't see many alive hic mounts.

Hick Trucks


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DJ-Chilvan
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Response to Hick Trucks 2012-02-26 21:08:29 Reply

lmao soo true hahaha


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