Changing Over The Years

[levusbevus]

I just feel compelled to vent this out to somewhere, but for me the past few years have been a crazy mindfuck for me as I've gone from a Straight Theist to a Gay Atheist.

This time 5-6 years ago I started going through puberty, but since I was religious (Jehovah's Witness) at the time I tried to not masturbate. But over the years I've come to the terms that it's okay to masturbate and release that tension.

I started looking up videos of theistic and atheistic arguments about 3 years ago and the atheistic arguments always seemed more compelling to me. They also made a ton more sense. So over the years I stopped believing in a supernatural deity and starting thinking more logically. So now I identify myself as an atheist.

It was also around this time I was doing a lot of self-discovery in the sexual sense. I went through a lot of denial assuming that I was straight, disciplining myself for any homo-erotic thoughts. It was quite distressing for me as you'd imagine, considering how society views gays. It wasn't until a year and a half ago that I started to just accept that I'm gay. I just can't help being attracted to men. I can't help it - the charisma, the voice, the physical appearance, the smell, everything about a man is really appealing to me.

So over the years I've done a lot of self-discovery both spiritually and sexually, how have you changed over the years NG? Anything as drastic as me?

[Darthleather]

I wouldn't know about that. I stay the same all the time. New emotians and feelings fuck up my routine.

[TheKman01]

Over the years, being 12-13, kids my age would be really mean or rude, saying mean things, things to me that hurt my feelings, and ya know, it got so bad to where I was used to it, I got shit from my dad and I got beat up for having bad grades, beat up bad. Not to the point where I got bloody but I had welts or it hurt really, really bad. And I just brushed it off and said/thought "oh, they don't mean it." (about the mean kids). And I got beat up almost every 2-3 weeks. Over years 14-15, I started thinking, "oh you little fuckface bad karma will hit you." Now, still at age 15, closer to 16, I just think, "talk shit, lets fight" mainly because MMA training really toughened me, so my life really went from a low point to the best it's been since my existence started.

[Sevkat]

At 2/3/12 07:11 PM, Darthleather wrote: I wouldn't know about that. I stay the same all the time.

Yeah because you're still just a kid.

[Crazy-Pigeon]

I've always been an underachiever with no goals in life or whatsoever. Spending most of my free-time on gaming and internet, I didn't had many friends either. When I was about 15-years old, I sort of looked into things like religion and read a lot in to philosophy.

In the end, I only learned that the human race is shit and climbing the mountain is where life is at.

[shrimpchris]

Well, me from a year ago would probably slap me from the present if I told him he'd love My Little Pony.

[levusbevus]

At 2/3/12 07:22 PM, shrimpchris wrote: Well, me from a year ago would probably slap me from the present if I told him he'd love My Little Pony.

It's rather the opposite for me. I used to like MLP but I've grown off of it since the latest series hasn't kept my attention and the fanbase doesn't really help. But a year ago I loved the show.