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I hate kids.

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Piarre
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I hate kids. 2011-10-24 21:28:04

This just happened four hours ago after school. Why are kids fucking arses anyway?

Anyway, after a good day of school which I generally liked since my Spanish teacher brought in some stuff for a fiesta and we had a pretty good time. I've been getting to know this nice girl and since I ride my bike home, I offered her a ride home when I learned that her ride couldn't come and she had to walk a while home. She agreed and we began our ride. Now, I actually liked this chick because she was nice, calm, and fairly attractive, and by like I mean a crush. We were nearly half way when I suggested we could stop at the park for a bit and chill out. She says sure and we buy some snow cones and sit on the bench. Of course, then a kid around 11 year olds is leading a pack of four children who are about eight and nine. The ringleader rides up on his scooter and says fairly loudly "This isn't the place to have sex you faggots!"

I stood up, now done with my snow cone and threw it away in the trashcan just nearby, then saying "Excuse me? Since when does eating snow cones mean we're having sex? Where the hell did you even learn what that means yet?". My girlfriend was just sitting quietly, I guess trying to see what I and they would do. The ringleader snatchs the tennis ball out of one of his friends hands and hurls it at me with surprisingly fast speed. I manage to duck and it bounces off the bench and slams right into his mouth, I guess shattering his lip flesh since he started to bleed. He started crying, wiping lots of the blood onto his hand and snatching up his scooter, then proceeding to hurl it at me. I was like "oh fuck" and again, ducked and watched as his scooter shattered on the bench. I picked up both halfs and proceeded to snap them in half AGAIN. My girlfriend finished our snow cones and got on my bike and began riding down. As we turn into her house, she thanks me then heads inside after a quick hug. As I ride off, the kids are walking down the streets and of course, the ringleader has an airsoft machine gun. I rode my bike through a small alley way to avoid them but he started firing at me as I came out the end. I was pissed off, so I got off my bike as the pellets bounced off me causing a bit of pain, and I picked up a rock and fucking threw that thing. It crushed the leaders hand and sent his airsoft gun skidding nearby. I laughed, jumped on my bike, and rode off.

fuck kids.

Garage
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Response to I hate kids. 2011-10-24 21:30:20

Goddamn, son.

You can snap a scooter into four pieces?

SnakeSkull
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Response to I hate kids. 2011-10-24 21:30:39

Geez, it sounds like these little pricks don't get beaten by their drunken fathers enough.


Barev dzez.

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Piarre
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Response to I hate kids. 2011-10-24 21:30:56

At 10/24/11 09:30 PM, Garage wrote: Goddamn, son.

You can snap a scooter into four pieces?

It was one of those shitty ones that you can buy for fifteen bucks so it wasn't the tough type of material.

TheMajormel
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Response to I hate kids. 2011-10-24 21:33:43

Wow,kids are disrespectful nowadays.
I mean,at least you didn't kick the crap out of them,you would've looked bad in front of your friend.


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NewgroundsNation
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Response to I hate kids. 2011-10-24 21:33:59

You did the right thing.

How old are you? jw


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Zeppelyn
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Response to I hate kids. 2011-10-24 21:34:01

Good, I hate kids like that.


My Art.
(Most of it's old shit)

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Scarface
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Response to I hate kids. 2011-10-24 21:34:52

They need their asses beaten severely.


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GamesArmor
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Response to I hate kids. 2011-10-24 21:35:51

Don't belive you.

Razz
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Response to I hate kids. 2011-10-24 21:36:54

At 10/24/11 09:28 PM, Piarre wrote: Now, I actually liked this chick because she was nice, calm, and fairly attractive, and by like I mean a crush.
My girlfriend was just sitting quietly

So, first you state she's your crush; something people seldom admit to. Then say she's your girlfriend? Fake and gay.


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Piarre
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Response to I hate kids. 2011-10-24 21:40:07

At 10/24/11 09:36 PM, JoeMation wrote:
At 10/24/11 09:28 PM, Piarre wrote: Now, I actually liked this chick because she was nice, calm, and fairly attractive, and by like I mean a crush.
My girlfriend was just sitting quietly
So, first you state she's your crush; something people seldom admit to. Then say she's your girlfriend? Fake and gay.

You must be the stupidest person I have ever met.

Girlfriend = a friend that is a girl OR someone you are in a relationship with. I meant the first one. kthx.

Also I'm 15 for whoever asked above.

Manly-Chicken
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Response to I hate kids. 2011-10-24 21:42:26

At 10/24/11 09:28 PM, Piarre wrote: This just happened four hours ago after school.

You are still a kid.


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Piarre
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Response to I hate kids. 2011-10-24 21:43:16

At 10/24/11 09:42 PM, Manly-Chicken wrote:
At 10/24/11 09:28 PM, Piarre wrote: This just happened four hours ago after school.
You are still a kid.

15 = kid???

I'm almost turning sixteen and I'm literally quiet, nothing like that even if if you consider fifteen a kid.

K1LL80Y
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Response to I hate kids. 2011-10-24 21:46:58

This thread made me laugh,thanks. Especially this pissed off teen.

Oh,and I love you :)

Manly-Chicken
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Response to I hate kids. 2011-10-24 21:48:46

At 10/24/11 09:43 PM, Piarre wrote:
At 10/24/11 09:42 PM, Manly-Chicken wrote:
At 10/24/11 09:28 PM, Piarre wrote: This just happened four hours ago after school.
You are still a kid.
15 = kid???

I'm almost turning sixteen and I'm literally quiet, nothing like that even if if you consider fifteen a kid.

I'm a kid, and I'm almost 18 (tomorrow).

You are legally a kid until 18 or 21.


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TheColourAwesome
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Response to I hate kids. 2011-10-24 21:57:42

Wait just one second here. Is she your girlfriends or is she a girl you have a crush on? How does one bike ride determine if she's your girlfriends or not?

Also, never underestimate getho, little shits.


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Scarface
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Response to I hate kids. 2011-10-24 21:59:19

At 10/24/11 09:43 PM, Piarre wrote: I'm almost turning sixteen

You're practically a grown-up.


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Laughingbox
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Response to I hate kids. 2011-10-24 22:07:52

You did the most correct thing, OP, and I salute you for that. Of course, I don't know if you just made this up or whatnot, but it was a good read. Excellent work.


Veritas est index sui et falsi. (Truth is the criterion of itself and the false.)
Carpe diem quam minimum credula postero. (Sieze the day; trust little in tomorrow.)

MultiCanimefan
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Response to I hate kids. 2011-10-24 22:25:17

I like that all of these stories always include our fellow Newgrounder always winning the fight.

SpaceWhale
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Response to I hate kids. 2011-10-24 22:29:35

Fucking hell, I love reading these stories! Keep them coming, man!


Can you feel it mister Krabs?

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Response to I hate kids. 2011-10-24 22:31:20

You know, son. I always wondered what it's like to eat a tennis ball and an ice cream together.


Mortal kombat sprites are Aweshum

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LocoJoe
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Response to I hate kids. 2011-10-24 22:54:31

At 10/24/11 09:28 PM, Piarre wrote: even learn what that means yet?". My girlfriend was just sitting quietly, I guess trying to see what I

At what point in between you having a crush on you did she agree to become your girlfriend?


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Love
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Response to I hate kids. 2011-10-24 22:56:34

At 10/24/11 09:43 PM, Piarre wrote: 15 = kid???

Um, yes, yes, and yes.


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Riott
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Response to I hate kids. 2011-10-24 23:03:32

At 10/24/11 09:28 PM, Piarre wrote: Why are kids fucking arses anyway?

Because they have no life experience which makes them think that they've got the world all figured out even though they don't know the half of it. Althought, I guess that's just how it is. No matter how old people get they still think they know so much when in all reality none of us know shit.


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EyeLovePoozy
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Response to I hate kids. 2011-10-24 23:04:19

Kids hating little kids is funny.

You're barely weened off sucking on your mama's titties yourself.

Stop lying, do your fucking homework and then go to fucking sleep.

RIGHT NOW!

Or else no xbox for a week and I'll give you pow-pow. Hard pow-pow.