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Good one tally, Haha. I am surprised this is still on the front page.

When Dirty Johnny was in kindergarten the first day The teacher told the class, "Class each day I'm going to ask a question as soon as class begins, who ever can answer the question can take the rest of the year off & will get an A+."
Next day the teacher comes in & asks "What is the average annual rainfall of the Amazon basin?"
No one answered. The next day the teacher walks in & asks "Who was the Secretary of State in 1943?"
Again no one knew the answer.
The 4th day Johnny was playing with some blue marbles right when the teacher walked into class he through them in front of the door, the teacher stepped on them & fell. getting up the teacher picks up the marbles looks at them and said "ALRIGHT WHO HAS TINY BLUE BALLS?!"
Johnny said "NuclearWarFare, see ya next year teach."

whats worse than a dead baby? a pile of dead babies. Whats worse than a pile of dead babies? One live one on the inside, eating his way out.

How do you start a jewish parade?
Roll a nickel down a hill.

What do you call a black man who flies planes?
A pilot you rascist.

Why do white people go to mexican yard sales?
To get their shit back.

Why are black people so good at basketball?
The three basics: Running,Shooting, & stealing

How many babies does it take to paint a house?

Depends on how hard you throw them.

Why did the little boy drop his ice cream?
He got hit by a bus.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple?
The Holocaust.

Knock, Knock.
Who's there?
Dave.
Dave who?
Dave proceeds to break into tears as his grandmother's Alzheimers has progressed to the point where she can no longer remember him.

What would George Washington do if he were alive today?
Scream and scratch at the top of his coffin.

There's an Irishman, a homosexual, and a Jew standing at a bar. What a fine example of an integrated community.

Yes I stole all those from a certain website haha.

Alright, time for a sexist joke.

What do you call a blank piece of paper when a woman is reading it? Her rights.

What do you call a woman doing housework? Who cares. Why isn't she in the kitchen making me a sandwich.

chuckle chuckle, hearty laugh hearty laugh

hey guess what

CHICKEN BUTT

two unrelated events happened last year.

1. i sleep walked. 2. my pet turtle got pregnant.

What's worse than 1 bee sting? 2 bee stings.
What's worse than 2 bee stings? The Holocaust.
What's worse than the Holocaust? 3 bee stings.

nyuck nyuck nyuck

why? because

rhetorical jokes, oh ho ho

I took a girl back to my flat.

"You haven't removed many bras have you?" she sighed.

"What gave it away?"

"The scissors, mainly."

Seal walks into a club.

The 3 Bears woke up to eat breakfast.

Baby Bear said, "My porridge is too hot!"

Papa Bear said, " My Porridge is too cold!"

Mama Bear said, " Both of yall muthfuckas lyin! I cooked grits!!"

So a Jew, a Hindu and a German are walking along a desert road. Suddenly it becomes dark and they need a place to sleep. They see a farm and decide to go there. When they knock and the farmer opens the door they ask if they can sleep in the farm. The farmer says 'Yeah alright, but I've only got place for 2 in here, so one of you guys should sleep in the stable'. The Jew says 'Not a problem, I'll sleep there'.
So the Jew goes to the stable, but when he comes in, he sees a pig. Being a Jew he has to stay away from pigs, so the Jew knocks on the door, goes in and explains that he can't stay sleep with a pig. Then the Hindu says 'It's okay, you know what, I'll sleep in the stable'. So the Hindu goes to the stable, but as he's about to lay down, he spots a cow. Cows are holy for Hindu's, so he should leave it alone. The Hindu knocks and goes back in as well. Then the German decides to sleep in the stable. So he goes to the stable, but then somebody knocks on the door again. The farmer checks who's in front of the door. It's the cow and the pig!

I have nothing against Gemans, but the joke happens to be like this.

At 8/26/11 09:14 AM, Knis wrote:

teacher picks up the marbles looks at them and said "ALRIGHT WHO HAS TINY BLUE BALLS?!"

Johnny said "NuclearWarFare, see ya next year teach."

Well SORRY, I was just trying to have fun and play a game with Johnny

Little Red Riding Hood was skipping through the woods on the way to granny's house. The Big Bad Wolf jumped out in front her and said, " Little Red! I'm gonna throw you on the ground and make sweet love to you!" Little Red Riding Hood said, " Oh no you aint! You gonna eat me like the book said!"

At 8/26/11 04:12 PM, Natick wrote:

That is an old, old joke...

i know. but its still funny. To me anyway.

This thread.

your mom

jk your posts

jk ninja turtles

BBC News: Three girls, 15, raped in flats.

I prefer mine in heels.

Well here's mine

Pierre the french fighter pilot was having a picnic with his girlfriend. Before they kissed Pierre opened a bottle of red wine on her face. She asked why, Pierre said gallantly "I am Pierre the french fighter pilot, when i have red meat, i must have red wine. " He then lifted her shirt and before he kissed her stomach, he opened a bottle of white wine and poured it on her. Again she asked why. "I am Pierre the french fighter pilot, when i have white meat, i must have white wine. " He then gently pulled off her dress and... set her crotch on fire, she yelled and put it out. She screamed "What is wrong with you?" he calmly replied ""I am Pierre the french fighter pilot, when I go down, I go down in flames."

What?! His Dick has the same as his Finger?!

Here's one Sergei learned as a child. There is a boy on his birthday, and for his wish he wants to ake a shower with his father and mother separately. Him and his father step into the bathroom and when they hop in the shower his father says,"Cover your eyes when looking at me." The boy looks anyway and see's something strange so he asks,"Daddy, What's that?" He tells the boy,"Son that's my hairy snake." The boy then hops into the shower with his mom who gives him the same rule. The boy breaks it and asks,"Mom, What are those?" She says,"That's my hairy bush, and these are my missiles." They finish with the shower, and the boy has one more wish to sleep with his mom and dad. They tell him not to look under the covers, but he does any way and yells,"MOM! DADDY'S HAIRY SNAKE IS GOING TOWARDS YOUR HAIRY BUSH! USE YOUR MISSILES!"

Religion

Y DO BLACK PPL SCREAM WHN THEY PO0P?

CUZ THEY THINK THEY MELTIN!

At 8/26/11 03:57 PM, LiquidOoze wrote: stuff

I don't get it, and I've got ancestors from Germany.

A naked blonde walks into a bar with a salami under one arm and a poodle under the other. The bartender, puzzled, looks at her and says AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH!

Cookie for the badly done reference

How many black people does it take to straighten a noose
one

You.

Ba-dum-bssh