I don't think this thread has been done before. If it has, my apologies, lol.
Imagine that you're walking down a dark alley for some stupid reason. You then encounter some hoodlums trying to mug you. There are 2 of them. Now here's where the fun begins...
...You must choose one object that is not intended for use as a weapon to be your weapon of choice in defending yourself against these muggers. What would you guys choose?
I choose a flare gun. A flare gun is surprisingly dangerous and fatal. I'll use it to burn both of these muggers and walk away as they scream in pain and agony as the fires consume them. Here's an example of how flare guns work.
What's your choice, Newgrounds?