Be a Supporter!

This asshole expirimented on me...

  • 1,185 Views
  • 28 Replies
New Topic Respond to this Topic
Roxbury97
Roxbury97
  • Member since: Nov. 6, 2010
  • Offline.
Forum Stats
Member
Level 02
Blank Slate
This asshole expirimented on me... Mar. 3rd, 2011 @ 06:48 AM Reply

Well today in Biology all my friends were at a Sport Field trip and I had no friends in my class. So I was sitting next to this downie who thinks he has an IQ of 180 but is a total retard. I had to partner up with him in our experiment to compare different animal bloods under a microscope. He claimed that the human blood had a disease in it.

He then told me we should check to make sure, I asked him how. Before I knew it he took a scalpel from the bench and cut my hand. I yelled at the fucker as blood ran down my hand. He put it under the slider and said my blood was completely pure. He then yelled that he found the secret to human cloning. He grabbed my neck from behind and prodded me forward with the scalpel. He told me he was taking me to his super secret lab where he can clone me.

He then chanted FUGULZAR and expected to be teleported there. Nothing really happened so I just slapped him in the face and ran. This fucker is quick for his down syndromeness. He chased after me and caught me. He then yelled at me I AM JACOB NEGROY AND I WILL HAVE MY CLONE. He then stabbed my chest several times and to no avail. The scalpel broke on my chest of steel. I yelled out KAOKEN! I turned red and used the kamahamaha wave on him and obliterated him and half my school. The firemen turned up with the police and they tried to arrest me. I called on the spirits of my friends and used a spirit bomb and blew my school the fuck up. I then flew off into the distance with highway to hell play in the background.

How interesting was your day NG?


Fabulicious

BBS Signature
Minerals
Minerals
  • Member since: Sep. 3, 2010
  • Offline.
Forum Stats
Member
Level 02
Blank Slate
Response to This asshole expirimented on me... Mar. 3rd, 2011 @ 06:54 AM Reply

At first I thought this was real, but then I was sad.

32lulz
32lulz
  • Member since: Feb. 20, 2011
  • Offline.
Forum Stats
Member
Level 05
Blank Slate
Response to This asshole expirimented on me... Mar. 3rd, 2011 @ 06:59 AM Reply

i went out and murdered 356 satanic cows from nagul.i win.


BBS Signature
argile
argile
  • Member since: Jun. 2, 2010
  • Offline.
Forum Stats
Member
Level 12
Audiophile
Response to This asshole expirimented on me... Mar. 3rd, 2011 @ 06:59 AM Reply

Well that had to be a interesting experience... Your science partner sounds gullible as Peter Griffin

kazumazkan
kazumazkan
  • Member since: Nov. 29, 2009
  • Offline.
Forum Stats
Member
Level 13
Melancholy
Response to This asshole expirimented on me... Mar. 3rd, 2011 @ 07:02 AM Reply

and you let him do it

i dont know who is the dumb ass here you or him


"Did I ever tell you what the definition of insanity is?
was her name tenneassi
omtish

BBS Signature
groundpwndr
groundpwndr
  • Member since: Apr. 6, 2008
  • Offline.
Forum Stats
Member
Level 27
Blank Slate
Response to This asshole expirimented on me... Mar. 3rd, 2011 @ 07:03 AM Reply

At 3/3/11 07:00 AM, Rummy0 wrote: THAT STORY SUCKED COCK, I WANT THE HUNGRY CATERPILLAR.


Here you go.

Gimmick
Gimmick
  • Member since: Aug. 20, 2008
  • Offline.
Forum Stats
Member
Level 27
Game Developer
Response to This asshole expirimented on me... Mar. 3rd, 2011 @ 08:55 AM Reply

wut.


Slint approves of me! | "This is Newgrounds.com, not Disney.com" - WadeFulp
"Sit look rub panda" - Alan Davies

BBS Signature
The-Great-One
The-Great-One
  • Member since: Sep. 2, 2006
  • Offline.
Forum Stats
Member
Level 30
Writer
Response to This asshole expirimented on me... Mar. 3rd, 2011 @ 08:57 AM Reply

OP. Please put this in the Writing Forum and continue with your work. It sounds FUCKING AWESOME!


| The Interviewer | Review Terms 3.0 | [This Space For Rent ] | Club Stoic |

BBS Signature
RockLou
RockLou
  • Member since: Feb. 14, 2006
  • Offline.
Forum Stats
Member
Level 20
Blank Slate
Response to This asshole expirimented on me... Mar. 3rd, 2011 @ 09:03 AM Reply

I ripped a guy's spine out of his own asshole.


Play my epic rpg NAO - The Awakening

... but I'm legally obligated not to say that.

AgroNurse
AgroNurse
  • Member since: May. 15, 2010
  • Offline.
Forum Stats
Member
Level 08
Blank Slate
Response to This asshole expirimented on me... Mar. 3rd, 2011 @ 11:02 AM Reply

At 3/3/11 07:00 AM, Rummy0 wrote: THAT STORY SUCKED COCK, I WANT THE HUNGRY CATERPILLAR.

Hahahaha, nicely done


BBS Signature
MatthewF
MatthewF
  • Member since: Jun. 6, 2010
  • Offline.
Forum Stats
Member
Level 35
Musician
Response to This asshole expirimented on me... Mar. 3rd, 2011 @ 11:09 AM Reply

My day was just fine. I sacraficed some virgins and prayed to Satan.

Hail Satan!


Excuse me, I'm looking for a car that's been tricked out to look like an ice cream truck.
I could use a strapping young man to do some chores around the house!
AHHH! JACKPOT!

BBS Signature
nakedxbabe
nakedxbabe
  • Member since: Feb. 22, 2010
  • Offline.
Forum Stats
Member
Level 07
Musician
Response to This asshole expirimented on me... Mar. 3rd, 2011 @ 11:30 AM Reply

i don't know how an asshole can do that, an asshole in on your butt, has no brains to think that through.


Myspace
Website Coming SoonPurevolume
<BR>Perfection Confection Sugar, you can use it on babies.

BBS Signature
Rude-Awakening
Rude-Awakening
  • Member since: Aug. 25, 2007
  • Offline.
Forum Stats
Member
Level 21
Movie Buff
Response to This asshole expirimented on me... Mar. 3rd, 2011 @ 01:09 PM Reply

You sound like an ineligible test subject, plus I'm pretty sure blood can't be pure. I know you were expecting a high-five and well done from the Newgrounds community for this riveting tale but you can go fuck yourself. Bro.


NG Gamerscore Leaderboard 2.0
Gamertag: JuicyRumpSteak

BBS Signature
Magic-Mushroom
Magic-Mushroom
  • Member since: Feb. 22, 2011
  • Offline.
Forum Stats
Member
Level 07
Blank Slate
Response to This asshole expirimented on me... Mar. 3rd, 2011 @ 01:13 PM Reply

At 3/3/11 06:48 AM, Roxbury97 wrote:

Go yank a cock through your ass. I just pissed away a good 30 seconds minutes of my life.


They said I could become anything so I became everything.

BBS Signature
Obvious-M
Obvious-M
  • Member since: Dec. 4, 2006
  • Offline.
Forum Stats
Member
Level 22
Blank Slate
Response to This asshole expirimented on me... Mar. 3rd, 2011 @ 01:35 PM Reply

I thought this was going to turn out like the scene from "The Thing".


Gamertag- MarshallxDav | Steam ID- Eshneh | LastFM- MarshallNPK

BBS Signature
Cootie
Cootie
  • Member since: Jul. 7, 2006
  • Offline.
Forum Stats
Member
Level 43
Movie Buff
Response to This asshole expirimented on me... Mar. 3rd, 2011 @ 01:43 PM Reply

At 3/3/11 07:00 AM, Rummy0 wrote: THAT STORY SUCKED COCK, I WANT THE HUNGRY CATERPILLAR.

I also want the Hungry Caterpillar.


For I am and forever shall be... a master ruseman.

BBS Signature
TechnoHound
TechnoHound
  • Member since: Mar. 13, 2010
  • Offline.
Forum Stats
Member
Level 08
Blank Slate
Response to This asshole expirimented on me... Mar. 3rd, 2011 @ 01:49 PM Reply

My day was satisfying because my not so cheap bag fell apart


By Life Stream

BBS Signature
RubberTrucky
RubberTrucky
  • Member since: Mar. 27, 2005
  • Offline.
Forum Stats
Member
Level 10
Blank Slate
Response to This asshole expirimented on me... Mar. 3rd, 2011 @ 02:01 PM Reply

YOU NINCOMPOOP. The school was only a setback. I WILL HAVE MY CLONE!!!


RubberJournal: READY DOESN'T EVEN BEGIN TO DESCRIBE IT!
Mathematics club: we have beer and exponentials.
Cartoon club: Cause Toons>> Charlie Sheen+Raptor

BBS Signature
JackRocker
JackRocker
  • Member since: May. 27, 2009
  • Offline.
Forum Stats
Member
Level 11
Musician
Response to This asshole expirimented on me... Mar. 3rd, 2011 @ 02:07 PM Reply

At 3/3/11 01:13 PM, Falling-Apart wrote:
At 3/3/11 06:48 AM, Roxbury97 wrote:
30 seconds minutes

wat

HeilYeah
HeilYeah
  • Member since: Apr. 25, 2010
  • Offline.
Forum Stats
Member
Level 03
Blank Slate
Response to This asshole expirimented on me... Mar. 3rd, 2011 @ 03:08 PM Reply

This would have been a good story if you had kept it believable. As it is, it sounds wildly improvisational and childish. Unimpressed. My day was pretty good though, thanks.

McGangbang
McGangbang
  • Member since: Sep. 12, 2010
  • Offline.
Forum Stats
Member
Level 06
Blank Slate
Response to This asshole expirimented on me... Mar. 3rd, 2011 @ 03:16 PM Reply

i destroyed pluto
like anyone would notice, no one cares about pluto.

stupid half-planet

BBS Signature
Roxbury97
Roxbury97
  • Member since: Nov. 6, 2010
  • Offline.
Forum Stats
Member
Level 02
Blank Slate
Response to This asshole expirimented on me... Mar. 4th, 2011 @ 02:30 AM Reply

At 3/3/11 02:01 PM, RubberTrucky wrote: YOU NINCOMPOOP. The school was only a setback. I WILL HAVE MY CLONE!!!

OH FUCK YOU"RE NOT HERE TOO!!!!!


Fabulicious

BBS Signature
Makakaov
Makakaov
  • Member since: Jun. 23, 2009
  • Offline.
Forum Stats
Member
Level 22
Blank Slate
Response to This asshole expirimented on me... Mar. 4th, 2011 @ 03:09 AM Reply

You're not funny.

masheenH3ad
masheenH3ad
  • Member since: Oct. 8, 2009
  • Offline.
Forum Stats
Member
Level 11
Musician
Response to This asshole expirimented on me... Mar. 4th, 2011 @ 03:22 AM Reply

This really made me excited for I thought it was true.

I am really interested on what will happen to the bad guys in the end of a story. Suddenly it made me laugh for I discovered that it is not true. Hahaha

Made my day however. Thanks for the post. I thought I don't have a reason to laugh today.

Roxbury97
Roxbury97
  • Member since: Nov. 6, 2010
  • Offline.
Forum Stats
Member
Level 02
Blank Slate
Response to This asshole expirimented on me... Apr. 10th, 2011 @ 09:55 PM Reply

update: da guy got cansher and dide so im safe now!


Fabulicious

BBS Signature
DevourerJay
DevourerJay
  • Member since: Jan. 24, 2006
  • Offline.
Forum Stats
Member
Level 43
Blank Slate
Response to This asshole expirimented on me... Apr. 10th, 2011 @ 09:59 PM Reply

i got 50 points on Starcraft 2 (achievements)
i got to play flag football...
and i made dinner...

that was my day


DevourerJay~Of all the things I've lost, I miss my mind the most.
Sig By Xeno.
Formerly known as MissingNYC

BBS Signature
Letiger
Letiger
  • Member since: Aug. 6, 2007
  • Offline.
Forum Stats
Member
Level 22
Melancholy
Response to This asshole expirimented on me... Apr. 10th, 2011 @ 10:00 PM Reply

At 3/3/11 06:48 AM, Roxbury97 wrote:

The scalpel broke on my chest of steel. I yelled out KAOKEN! I turned red and used the kamahamaha wave on him and obliterated him and half my school. The firemen turned up with the police and they tried to arrest me. I called on the spirits of my friends and used a spirit bomb and blew my school the fuck up. I then flew off into the distance with highway to hell play in the background.


How interesting was your day NG?

Believeable up to here


BBS Signature
Viktor
Viktor
  • Member since: Mar. 20, 2010
  • Offline.
Forum Stats
Member
Level 09
Melancholy
Response to This asshole expirimented on me... Apr. 10th, 2011 @ 10:01 PM Reply

While for one, I was in science today and since we were in a tornado warning, we went outside to experiment on the weather. When we released the chemicals quickly a tornado spouted, but quite too fast it came down over the school, and ripped it up. As we started running we knew we were fucked. My friend shouted something about dicks and newgrounds before being sucked into the massive twister.
I made it out alive, but I had to dig underground as fast as a mother fucker can, and I finally guy underground before almost suffocating myself by covering myself with dirt. After the storm had passed, I came out to nothing and the whole town was gone. "Fuck it" I said and walked to Canada, had a burrito, and posted this.

Roxbury97
Roxbury97
  • Member since: Nov. 6, 2010
  • Offline.
Forum Stats
Member
Level 02
Blank Slate
Response to This asshole expirimented on me... Apr. 10th, 2011 @ 10:05 PM Reply

At 4/10/11 09:59 PM, DevourerJay wrote: i got 50 points on Starcraft 2 (achievements)
i got to play flag football...
and i made dinner...

that was my day

My day on that hot autumn day, was much, much betterer


Fabulicious

BBS Signature