Kim Kardashian

[FunnymanCharlie]

This useless waste of organized, carbon-based molecules has, in a normal society, no marketable talents or skills. She has no right to command the levels of compensation she currently receives from our backward fucking culture.

She provides no meaningful service to mankind; excepting perhaps her passive facilitation of the excretion of man-batter. (Although, the excretion of man-batter is largely due to men's furious appetite for the rub-n-tug; with which we can use any amongst millions of images in our spank-bank.)

Does she have a nice ass? Sure...it's an excellent ass! I wanna take a big bite out of each cheek. Not for sexual reasons; I'm in a committed relationship with a highly intelligent woman. I want to bite her ass to test it's durability. It's rumored that her ass-cheek implants were fabricated from materials developed during NASA's Apollo mission. Talk about useful spillover technology!!! My desire to bite her ass comes purely from my own scientific curiosity.

I want to position both my hands eagle-talon style on her cheeks and squeeze with all my might. Then release...to see if I leave handprint indentations. And then...observe her ass slowly return to form like tempurpedic mattress material.

I want to bend her over in order to place a full champagne glass gingerly on one ass cheek; then abruptly drop a bowling ball on the other. Will the glass topple? What do you think?

She commands her more than generous living through the fact that she's a slut with a bionic ass! She wasn't even that instrumental in making the love of a bulbous, oversized ass mainstream; Jennifer Lopez and Sir Mix-A-Lot could probably sue for royalties. Kim Kardashian indeed sits on the asses of giants!

Why am I going off on this Asstastic Armenian? I read that she participates in Sponsored Tweets program. That is, she is currently paid $10,000 or more every time she tweets for a sponsor.

Things like, "Wow! It's hot today! I could sure go for a frosty treat at Coldstone!". Cha-Ching!!! $10,000!!! This is a travesty of what is currently an unjust, decadent and degenerate culture. That typing, "I like Diet Coke" into a handheld device could "earn" anyone three months of a teacher's salary is fucking vomit-inducing.

I have an idea! Let's pool our money, buy a sponsored tweet and have Kim write:

"I, Kim Kardashian, am a completely useless tool; I am rich because I'm a slut and lonely men like to jizz on my face in magazines."

That might have been too many characters; fuck it!

[RyderOmega]

Who is this Kim Kardashian you speak of?

[ChainsawNinjaZX]

It is truly a pleasure to read such a piece of text dedicated to the hatred and description of a person with an abnormal ass. I am left to question why you would spend the time informing us about this, but I thank you for it.

[kisame]

At 10/2/10 01:26 AM, RyderOmega wrote: Who is this Kim Kardashian you speak of?

Kill the phonies.

[RyderOmega]

At 10/2/10 01:30 AM, kisame wrote:

At 10/2/10 01:26 AM, RyderOmega wrote: Who is this Kim Kardashian you speak of?

Kill the phonies.

Oh, I remember now!

But that is the only thing I know of them.

[assassin1337]

At 10/2/10 01:30 AM, kisame wrote:

At 10/2/10 01:26 AM, RyderOmega wrote: Who is this Kim Kardashian you speak of?

Kill the phonies.

Kill them all.

[HarryFeltersnach]

you hate kim k so much, yet you spend all this time typing a bunch of useless bullshit about her on the bbs? take a look in the mirror.

[Bluemidgetguy]

God reading that made me want to rub one out and think of Kim......or Jim.

[Coop5245]

At 10/2/10 01:30 AM, kisame wrote:

At 10/2/10 01:26 AM, RyderOmega wrote: Who is this Kim Kardashian you speak of?

Kill the phonies.

someone get me a shotgun i want that to happen for real

[C12claws]

At 10/2/10 02:02 AM, Coop5245 wrote:

At 10/2/10 01:30 AM, kisame wrote:

At 10/2/10 01:26 AM, RyderOmega wrote: Who is this Kim Kardashian you speak of?

Kill the phonies.

someone get me a shotgun i want that to happen for real

*hands Coop5245 shotgun* May your slugs fly true and thier deaths be painful.

[Coop5245]

At 10/2/10 02:05 AM, C12claws wrote: *hands Coop5245 shotgun* May your slugs fly true and thier deaths be painful.

Let's do this LEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OY

[Rachel]

At 10/2/10 01:26 AM, RyderOmega wrote: Who is this Kim Kardashian you speak of?

This thing here is Kim Kardashian. She's basically an... " American celebutante, socialite, television personality, producer, actress, and model"

[Odio]

i wish i was kim kardashian she is so pretty

i want to be rich and a princess too :(

[Kenneth-Knows-All]

I don't know what she is but I'd probably have sex with her.