Tips on how to continue this?

[Sahariel]

I need help on how to continue this. My muse has run dry and I need help rekindling it.

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Damon had worked his entire teenage life in the butcher shop. He was strong enough to cut a thick slab of meat with a single hack and really, that was all that mattered to him. His biggest problem was killing time in the store, so much so that he spent most of his time reading the newspapers, wondering if things could've turned out differently, and thinking about how much he loved his sister.

The best thing - in Damon's opinion, perhaps the only good thing - about living on minimum wage in a hostel room alone with his sister Saorise was a feeling of relief. The feeling that he'd plunged as low as he could plunge and he'd hit bottom.

Damon shot a quick glance at Garcia, his manager, as the stout man sat in front of the television as he poured himself a glass of ice cold water. After hacking off a section of the cow carcass as instructed, he watched as Garcia downed the glass in one quick gulp, breathing a sigh of relief, alleviating briefly the sweltering heat.

Heavy thuds of a butcher's hatchet cleaving meat and bone rang like a bell in his ears. The counter tops were stainless steel, juices and blood of raw meat running deep into the cracks of the wooden cutting board. Fluorescent lights glared off the display cases. Blood both crusted and fresh coated his apron. The air was heavy with the wet scent of raw meat. The place was worn, with faded posters advertising daily specials gone by. The titles were a yellowish white, stained with weeks of negligence and streaked with blood. The evening news droned on in the background as Damon continued to cut up the carcass unperturbed.

"A new weapon seems to have been used in the increasingly prolonged Eastern European hostilities." How he wished to stop the weapon from being built. Hack.

"A string of lootings is plaguing many areas of Central and South America suffering from shortages." How he wished to stop the looters. Hack.

"Police have yet to name a suspect in the recent sex murders in Tokyo." How he wished to have the investigative prowess to catch the murderer. Hack.

"Devastating pollution throughout Central Asia is sparking off riots in protest." How he wished to prevent the pollution. Hack.
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Thinking of having Damon think about his sister and back when he failed to save a bird, which was the start of his Hero Complex. Thoughts?

[Wolf-Raven]

Actually, if i were in your shoes, i'd expand this. Create some dialogue with the boss to get a feel for the character. If the incident of failing to save the bird is important, don't let it all come out at once. I try to use a method when i write: Small things, very small character perks, little stories, side notes, etc are revealed through a paragraph of dialogue, just to keep the reader informed and not to bog them down too much in Dialogue. For instance, one person in my book doesn't like to dance. Bamb, that's a paragraph. Bigger, more life changing stuff, stuff that is very important to the development of the character and the story, that's deep and meaningful, is dropped hints throughout the story. Small bits would be a sentence of dialogue, a single sentence leaning towards what happened, etc.

But that's just me. You're your own author. Go to town.

[InsertFunnyUserName]

At 9/22/10 12:49 AM, Sahariel wrote: Thinking of having Damon think about his sister and back when he failed to save a bird, which was the start of his Hero Complex. Thoughts?

I don't think that you should add that in quite yet, particularly the bird piece. Have the story progress first, exposing the plot and allowing for the trait of a hero complex to become apparent to the reader through the character's actions before you start introducing his backstory. This will keep the reader wondering about the character's motivations. Besides, you don't want to go on for too long before introducing the main storyline.