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Why is my butt hole sore?

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Tykwa
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Why is my butt hole sore? Aug. 28th, 2010 @ 06:11 AM Reply

I took a big shit in the toilet, And it was a big shit, It was half black/brown and half green, The first majority was hard, And I had to push quite a load of strength to push it out

Once it started going there was no going back!, It slid out so fast!, And It felt so damn good, But only for a tiny moment, After about 5 seconds of enjoying my freshly laid poop, My ass started to burn, Not the kind of burn when you eat a hundred fiery pounds of salsa, But the kind where you think your ass is bleeding and was ripping to shreds by the one guy Mr.c, Who might I had has a very large rectum opener, Whew, Bad day

Anyways, This shit just plowed through my ass hole, And killed my rectum starfish, It took awhile and it has subsided slightly, But I have to clean my starfish quite often as it is bleeding painfully.

I hope the pain ends quite soon, I don't want to be put into the ER again for my chocolate starfish.

Does NG have anything to aid my rectum?, Has anyone had a similar situation with their starfishes?

Falonefal
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Response to Why is my butt hole sore? Aug. 28th, 2010 @ 06:13 AM Reply

One Word:

No lube.


Tick Tock

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HazeStigma
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Response to Why is my butt hole sore? Aug. 28th, 2010 @ 06:14 AM Reply

Hot oil will do the trick.

Might sting at first.

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Urban-Champion
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Response to Why is my butt hole sore? Aug. 28th, 2010 @ 06:14 AM Reply

Usually sticking your own head into your ass helps it a bit.

You probably just overstretched your sphincter, the pain should go away naturally in about 5 minutes.
PeterM
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Response to Why is my butt hole sore? Aug. 28th, 2010 @ 06:15 AM Reply

Just sit down for a while, maybe lie on your side.

Tinnitus
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Response to Why is my butt hole sore? Aug. 28th, 2010 @ 06:18 AM Reply

Pics or it didn't happen!


Check out My Youtube Channel! I'll accept any friend invite.

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Tykwa
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Response to Why is my butt hole sore? Aug. 28th, 2010 @ 06:34 AM Reply

At 8/28/10 06:18 AM, NiNjabaNaNa wrote: Pics or it didn't happen!

But that's against forum rules!, You are a naughty user!.

But kinky, :).

If you want to see it you will have to come here!, :)

Callum123456
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Response to Why is my butt hole sore? Aug. 28th, 2010 @ 06:36 AM Reply

At 8/28/10 06:13 AM, Falonefal wrote: One Word:

No lube.

That's two words.

mattuiop
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Response to Why is my butt hole sore? Aug. 28th, 2010 @ 06:44 AM Reply

put some cut cream up your ass. it works for me when I have a bleeding butt after an epic shit on the toilet

Tykwa
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Response to Why is my butt hole sore? Aug. 28th, 2010 @ 06:44 AM Reply

At 8/28/10 06:36 AM, Callum123456 wrote:
At 8/28/10 06:13 AM, Falonefal wrote: One Word:

No lube.
That's two words.

But if it was one word it would just be lube, Which would technically have solved my problem, Right?

Klik
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Response to Why is my butt hole sore? Aug. 28th, 2010 @ 06:46 AM Reply

is this thread a setup for a dirty joke?

PeterM
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Response to Why is my butt hole sore? Aug. 28th, 2010 @ 06:46 AM Reply

At 8/28/10 06:46 AM, klik wrote: is this thread a setup for a dirty joke?

Absolutely not you young scallywag!

Lintire
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Response to Why is my butt hole sore? Aug. 28th, 2010 @ 06:55 AM Reply

Now, what I would recommend is eating a whole lot of fibrous substances, then taking the most absolute huge shit you could possibly think of - just to even out the pain. Afterwards, go out and buy a Justin Bieber album, then sit in a dark corner, relax as the sloppy ear-rape begins - more pain up top, means less pain down the bottom, right?

As a sort of aftermeal, shove a rabid racoon into your abdomen and sit back as the magic begins!

chipotleaway
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Response to Why is my butt hole sore? Aug. 28th, 2010 @ 07:50 AM Reply

You should have took that crap slower!

Experience

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killerjeff
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Response to Why is my butt hole sore? Aug. 28th, 2010 @ 07:58 AM Reply

Learn to wipe.


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Sam
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Response to Why is my butt hole sore? Aug. 28th, 2010 @ 08:09 AM Reply

At 8/28/10 07:58 AM, killerjeff wrote: Learn to wipe.

Back to front? Front to back? Side to side? Standing up, or sitting down?

PacificNoob
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Response to Why is my butt hole sore? Aug. 28th, 2010 @ 11:25 AM Reply

Inserting a jar of salsa sauce could help, post vid of you after you did it.