Love and the like

[StarF68]

Cross posted from: http://starf.tumblr.com/

Yes, that's why it reads like a blog, it is. I still want opinions on this. :D

It's in the movies, songs and books
But if we move these songs and look
There's nothing in the way
And you can find something to say but...
All I ever really wanted was to have somebody say
That I was all they ever wanted in this world and that was love.

-Akira The Don (Love)

Love is a huge and expansive subject that I could talk about for a long time... So I'm sure I'll make many many posts involving it, and that means that I can't spend all of my time right now writing a book out of this post, so I'll just touch on a few points about it that have been on my mind lately.

I've said this before, there's only two girls who I have ever truly believed that I have felt love for. There was almost a third... But as time passed I realized that while I cared deeply for her, what I felt was not love. Love is deeper than care, deeper than a desire to be with someone... At least in my opinion, because love can't be categorized or explained. Trying to explain love would be like trying to explain the color red to someone who has been blind their entire life. "It's... well... RED."

To me love is something that gets so deeply implanted into you as a person that it can really mess with you can ultimately change who you are. It is why in many movies, books, and games where the protagonist has to save someone they love they are suddenly able to take on more than they would previously be able to. Love fuels you, it gives you hope, it gives you happiness, and in a way is more of an amplifier rather than a real feeling; it also can bring great pain, sorrow, and anguish. It is not so much a feeling in itself than a catalyst that hacks into your psychological system and manipulates your other feelings in inexplicit ways.

And as far as I'm concerned, if you truly do fall in love with someone, a part of you will always hold that fondness for them, no matter what happens. This is why I know one of those loves I previously believed was real was not... That fondness faded away. However the other two have remained strong over years, and I can't imagine that going away.

Now one thing I don't get is how people abuse the term "love," they throw it around like it doesn't matter. As if being in a relationship was a valid reason to start telling each other "I love you." There is no set time to start saying it, there is no set event that triggers it, it's a feeling (Yes I know I was just talking about how it's sort of not a feeling, but it's just easier to say, bear with me) and so you should only say it when you feel it and mean it.

It really bothers me when people break up and then act like they hate their ex when previously they were so very deeply in love with them. That's not fair. Am I saying you have to take the break-up in stride? Of course not. It's sad, it's depressing, whatever. You can be mad at them, you can feel betrayed, whatever, but you can't suddenly change your mind. The feelings of betrayal and sorrow are caused for a reason: You cared about them, and so to turn around and say "Yeah she was a bitch," or "fuck him I hate him anyway" is really fucking stupid. It's also equally stupid to look at their new relationships and think about how much better you are than their new partner. GET OVER IT.

If you truly love someone, you'll eventually realize that even though it hurts and it sucks and all of that, that you should want them to be happy anyway. If they weren't happy with you, that's a really terrible and heart-breaking situation, but you can't let it make you jaded. If they are happy with someone else, then you should be happy for them and find someone new to make you happy as well.

I've never understood why exes can't be friends. I mean I understand maybe not initially because certainly that would be awkward, but something happens between people where they act so petty and sever these relationships forever. People go from as close as two people to get to social poison, and it's an absurd transition when you really think about it.

Ultimately it makes me sad that people don't seem to understand or comprehend love. Or maybe it's just me and I have too high of standards. I have no idea, but these are just my opinions, take it or leave it. I just want everyone to get along.

[Sensationalism]

I agree with most of what you said but I don't think it's always best to continue being friends with your ex. Might make your new partner jealous and stuffs lol.

[Lowercaser]

At 4/25/10 01:14 AM, MuyBurrito wrote: I've both taken Oxytocin and been in Love.

Didnt laugh until I read your response, classic in my book.

I like the blog too, not sure if this is the place to post it though. Arent going through a breakup are you?

[StarF68]

At 4/25/10 01:22 AM, Lowercaser wrote: I like the blog too, not sure if this is the place to post it though. Arent going through a breakup are you?

Thank you! As much as I may seem like some angsty teenager, no I am not haha. I've seen a lot of this stuff going on with my friends though lately. Friends I used to hang out with together now have to stay separated, which makes it a hassle for me to make plans because god forbid I invite both of them. It's annoying to no end. Also I constantly see and hear friends bashing on their exes when they claimed to be so deeply in love with them and I just want to slap them for being so ridiculous.

At 4/25/10 01:21 AM, Sensationalism wrote: I agree with most of what you said but I don't think it's always best to continue being friends with your ex. Might make your new partner jealous and stuffs lol.

I completely agree that being friends with your ex isn't necessary at all! I'm friends with two of my exes, and two of them we have parted ways. Not just because we're exes though, just because we've changed and parted naturally. I just think it's silly for people to treat their ex like they're suddenly some horrible person when they used to say how much they loved them. It strikes me as very hypocritical.

[Lowercaser]

Youre a funny guy with good insight...dont know where i was goin with that but yeah

[Sensationalism]

I agree with that too. I can understand if the break up was particularly messy and stuff happened that made you see the person in a totally different way, you may not want to be around them. But I really wouldn't know. I'll just say I agree with you completely because it all makes sense.