Work in progress. . . suggestions?

[TheThirdSix]

Hey guys, I'm working on a new project titled ".swf", and I was wondering what criticism you could offer. It's about half-way done at this point, so don't be too harsh.

".swf"

[bl00db47h]

I like it!

Pretty good voice acting, and I really like the simplicity of the design and animation. I also like the whole, he's getting ready, he's nervous about it stuff.

I really don't know what to critique you about... except maybe the art. While I do enjoy the style I still think it can be better, like maybe make their faces less oblong, or thicken the lines, I dunno. maybe you could just try those suggestions out and see if you like them I guess,

[Slackman]

It's pretty good, although a little bit simplistic. The best advice that I can give you is to work on your faces a bit more. When the file in the beginning is yelling at the camera, I wanna see a bit more emotion in his face. Have him go through a few different expressions, levels of anger and intensity. His eyes in particular could impart quite a bit of emotion, but they don't even blink until the end. If you're doing a long shot of one character's face, it's a bit more impressive to have his expression change more. Even adding a few wrinkles here and there would help.

Also, when he fades out at the end of the shot, his hands fade seperately from his body and you can see his body through them. Things like that always bother me, but that may just be a personal pet peeve. I'd recommend either breaking down the image and turning down its alpha value so that the entire thing fades together or having a sheet of black fade in in front of him instead.

Otherwise, this looks pretty good. I look forward to the finished project!

[Zyphonee]

It's pretty good, but don't be so horny over gradients, and the lip sync is extremely rough, consider inbetweens.

[TheThirdSix]

Thanks a lot for the input, guys. I'll take all of your comments into consideration, and hopefully it will come out a great finished product. I'm hoping for a 3.60+!

[BeamShank]

I'm digging it, just don't ruin it in the second half.

[TheThirdSix]

Here's a new update:

http://www.newgrounds.com/dump/item/c4e6 c38576a7c5cb4b98ab2a79f243f2

I included some of the things that other posters brought up. Tell me what you think!

[bl00db47h]

At 2/21/10 10:50 PM, TheThirdSix wrote: Here's a new update:

http://www.newgrounds.com/dump/item/c4e6 c38576a7c5cb4b98ab2a79f243f2

I included some of the things that other posters brought up. Tell me what you think!

Pretty good! But one thing, I don't really get what's happening. Is he trying to survive zero-bombs? What's going on?

[DillonBrannick]

he already submitted it

[Markface]

Nice voice acting. Simplistic animation.