Intro to game, WIP, check it out!

[Psychofig]

http://spamtheweb.com/ul/upload/060210/7 5392_plate.php

I'm still working on my game Moovlin PC, and since many people thought the current intro sucked, I decided to work on a new one. I took a different approach too it though, alot of it is all FBF animation now. It looks pretty organic, there is some smooth jazz, and some funky sound effects.

Leave your feedback here, tell me if you think it would work.

Oh yeah, to find the game, check out my profile, and go to "Moovlin PC Demo V2". It's decent...

[Psychofig]

Argh, I'm impatient. Come on you guys, I know you all want to leave comments...

[DillonBrannick]

I think it's pretty cool

[Wolfos]

wow, thats amazing!

[Psychofig]

Thanks, any ideas on what to improve on?

[InnerChild548]

Not very good. Your artistic skill is mediocre. The filters look cheap. The cursor is not only useless, but annoying. The mouse isn't even hidden when it should be if you're using a custom cursor or just during the intro scene. The music is pretty low quality, but fitting nonetheless. And lastly I think noting what programs you used is unwanted. Nobody would really care and I would expect that to be in the authors comments or somewhere else.

[Psychofig]

At 2/7/10 05:41 PM, InnerChild548 wrote: Not very good. Your artistic skill is mediocre. The filters look cheap. The cursor is not only useless, but annoying. The mouse isn't even hidden when it should be if you're using a custom cursor or just during the intro scene. The music is pretty low quality, but fitting nonetheless. And lastly I think noting what programs you used is unwanted. Nobody would really care and I would expect that to be in the authors comments or somewhere else.

I can cut the cursor I guess, people think it's a bit annoying. Maybe you could elaborate more on your opinion of artistic skill, and maybe how the filters look cheap. They do look a bit generic, but as long as the text sticks out, the purpose is served. The music is 128kbps, don't understand how that is low quality.

And I ran out of ideas for what to put as credits, so I added the programs I used. But you're right, I don't need to have them there.

[Kwing]

Well the animation is kind of lazy. When the colors are "poured" in, it's feasible and pretty cool, too, but you need some serious liquid physics going on... Right now it looks like bread rising, but with the liquid sound effect it doesn't work. Even if the colors are "flooding" in from the side, make it slosh back and forth as it fills up.

Also, when you write "Flashpacked Studios" the animation is kind of shoddy when it comes in, although it's fine when you erase it and it goes blank. Make the invisible "pencil" move slower each frame as it's drawn in, and maybe make the ENTIRE pencil scribbling into a Movie Clip that's a mask for graphite, to make it look like it's actually pencil lead. That would like seriously badass if you could turn it into a realistic filter.

Also, when the outline of the main antagonist is being drawn, it happens way to quickly. Make sure it's spread out over more frames so that the animation comes out smoother and slower.

Also, the background looks kind of bland. I know it's supposed to be wrinkled paper, but something needs to liven it up. Maybe if you made it look a little darker, but with a little yellow tint flickering like candlelight it would make up for it, or maybe draw in a background but leave it uncolored as the intro progresses. Hell, maybe you could animate a couple specks of whatever floating around the screen. As it is, it looks boring. There's a dilemma here seeing as you need to liven it up, but you still need the focus to be on the characters. I'll leave that up to you.

[Psychofig]

At 2/7/10 05:48 PM, Kwing wrote: Well the animation is kind of lazy. When the colors are "poured" in, it's feasible and pretty cool, too, but you need some serious liquid physics going on... Right now it looks like bread rising, but with the liquid sound effect it doesn't work. Even if the colors are "flooding" in from the side, make it slosh back and forth as it fills up.

Also, when you write "Flashpacked Studios" the animation is kind of shoddy when it comes in, although it's fine when you erase it and it goes blank. Make the invisible "pencil" move slower each frame as it's drawn in, and maybe make the ENTIRE pencil scribbling into a Movie Clip that's a mask for graphite, to make it look like it's actually pencil lead. That would like seriously badass if you could turn it into a realistic filter.

Also, when the outline of the main antagonist is being drawn, it happens way to quickly. Make sure it's spread out over more frames so that the animation comes out smoother and slower.

Also, the background looks kind of bland. I know it's supposed to be wrinkled paper, but something needs to liven it up. Maybe if you made it look a little darker, but with a little yellow tint flickering like candlelight it would make up for it, or maybe draw in a background but leave it uncolored as the intro progresses. Hell, maybe you could animate a couple specks of whatever floating around the screen. As it is, it looks boring. There's a dilemma here seeing as you need to liven it up, but you still need the focus to be on the characters. I'll leave that up to you.

I can make the water fill take a little longer. My introduction's are kind of like old fashioned movies, with the credits first. They aren't supposed to be actionpacked. I don't find anything wrong with the sound effects besides the end bit, which is incomplete. I'll work on adding a few more frames to the water. It's supposed to look jaggy though, not smooth, for organic effect.

The logo is a bit sloppy, I can definetly work on that. I worked forwards by accident when doing that.
I'm also not going to mask the thing with a Lead filter, as it isn't going for realism, more cartoon.

The background is fine the way it is, if I made it too complex, it would take the focus away from the animation.

But thanks Kwing.

[InnerChild548]

At 2/7/10 05:46 PM, jfig111 wrote:

At 2/7/10 05:41 PM, InnerChild548 wrote: Not very good. Your artistic skill is mediocre. The filters look cheap. The cursor is not only useless, but annoying. The mouse isn't even hidden when it should be if you're using a custom cursor or just during the intro scene. The music is pretty low quality, but fitting nonetheless. And lastly I think noting what programs you used is unwanted. Nobody would really care and I would expect that to be in the authors comments or somewhere else.

I can cut the cursor I guess, people think it's a bit annoying. Maybe you could elaborate more on your opinion of artistic skill, and maybe how the filters look cheap. They do look a bit generic, but as long as the text sticks out, the purpose is served. The music is 128kbps, don't understand how that is low quality.

And I ran out of ideas for what to put as credits, so I added the programs I used. But you're right, I don't need to have them there.

Well, the noticed that the shine on your gradient block has curved which is odd lighting for a square object, but that's very specific. Now that I think about it the characters' first sketch is supposed to be rough but then refined. I think that's what you were going for, which isn't bad at all. It's just that the "rough sketch" brush was way to sharp. Low the smoothing. And to many Flash animators, filters are considered cheap, but to regular viewer they're bad ass effects. You can use them if you want. It's alright with me. The music isn't as low quality as I thought, it's rather decent as well.

Good luck with your project.

[Psychofig]

At 2/7/10 06:03 PM, InnerChild548 wrote:

At 2/7/10 05:46 PM, jfig111 wrote:

At 2/7/10 05:41 PM, InnerChild548 wrote: Not very good. Your artistic skill is mediocre. The filters look cheap. The cursor is not only useless, but annoying. The mouse isn't even hidden when it should be if you're using a custom cursor or just during the intro scene. The music is pretty low quality, but fitting nonetheless. And lastly I think noting what programs you used is unwanted. Nobody would really care and I would expect that to be in the authors comments or somewhere else.

I can cut the cursor I guess, people think it's a bit annoying. Maybe you could elaborate more on your opinion of artistic skill, and maybe how the filters look cheap. They do look a bit generic, but as long as the text sticks out, the purpose is served. The music is 128kbps, don't understand how that is low quality.

And I ran out of ideas for what to put as credits, so I added the programs I used. But you're right, I don't need to have them there.

Well, the noticed that the shine on your gradient block has curved which is odd lighting for a square object, but that's very specific. Now that I think about it the characters' first sketch is supposed to be rough but then refined. I think that's what you were going for, which isn't bad at all. It's just that the "rough sketch" brush was way to sharp. Low the smoothing. And to many Flash animators, filters are considered cheap, but to regular viewer they're bad ass effects. You can use them if you want. It's alright with me. The music isn't as low quality as I thought, it's rather decent as well.

Good luck with your project.

Sharp as in too thick? I don't know how to lower the smoothing, sorry, I'm not that great at flash despite using it for 2 years... probably because I'm only 16. The filters are kind of cheap, but it looked really bad with plain text, so I went for the glow filter. I don't know what else I could do to spiff up the text... do you have any ideas?

And thanks for the constructive criticism.

[Kwing]

I was thinking something like this would do well for the "pouring". It's my first attempt at liquid physics, but better than yours, no offense.