I just found out about my father...

[slayer1029]

The truth about my father. For the last 17 years I've been raised just by my mom, with no recollection whatsoever of this man. All I knew was that they were never married, and that he pretty much just abandoned us. We have absolutely no idea where he is.

Well, my mom didn't outright tell me, but she was writing a personal statement for a waiver (So I wouldn't have to provide his financial information to colleges, since I can't) and she asked me to read it when she was done.

As it turns out, he had been leading a double life. He was already married with kids when he met my mom, but hid this from her, and had a relationship for a few years. She was unknowingly the "other woman". After having two kids, she found out about his deceit, and obviously things went downhill. He threatened to kidnap us if she took him to court for child support. Knowing he would get partial custody, so this was a legitimate risk, my mom didn't pursue it, and has raised my brother and I by herself.

I honestly don't know how to feel about this. I've always had a hatred for him although I never knew him. I felt like he had abandoned us and never given us a chance to develop before giving up on us. Now, I feel like I was born because of a lie, like my mom was tricked into having me, and that he never even wanted to have a part in my life to begin with. I'm disgusted by the fact that I share genes with this lying, cheating, evil bastard. But I'm thankful I'm his polar opposite.

Now, I'm done applying to colleges. I have applications out to UPenn, Cornell, Stanford, Dartmouth, and MIT. I obviously feel like I'm going somewhere. And he's missed out on my life. But now that I know, I'm kind of torn. I want to meet my father. Not to try and make him a part of my life, but to give myself closure. To rub it in his face what he's missed, and is still missing out on. I want him to know that despite his abandonment, I turned out great and will never be the asshole he is. To show him that I've always been better off without him, and that I won't ever need him. I want to be able to say to his face that I never want to see him again. To turn the tables on him, and be the one who chooses to have him out of my life. I want revenge for his heartlessness. I want him to know that I hate him. I want to have the last word, and both enter and leave his life with a giant FUCK YOU!

Some people have told me that forgiving him will help me move on, but I don't see that as a possibility. I honestly just want to meet him, so I have closure. Is it outrageous to want to at least meet the person who gave you half your genes? Even if I know it'll just be to tell him how insignificant he is and what a terrible and weak man he is inside, I think its worth it. Hopefully I can cause him some grief for all that he's caused me. And I know revenge is immature, but I just want to show him that the product of his infidelity, his little mistake, is going to live a happy and successful life. I want to show him that I flourished without his influence. I want him to be sad for all that he's done.

What I'm wondering, is if anybody on Newgrounds has had a similar situation. I just wonder how they handled it, and what they ended up doing in the end. Nobody I know can really relate to this experience, so I'm hoping that maybe somebody here can...

[PBass]

I've heard about things like this, very shocking indeed. I wish you the best of luck.

[Ragnarokia]

A mans worth is counted by the women he has his seed with.

[Ship]

At least your father wasn't a Sith Lord.

[fli]

Be something BIG in life.
Be a friggin millionaire of some sort...

Make sure you use your mother's maiden name when it's plastered everywhere on the newspaper.
Let him feel like a douchbag loser that he is for abandoning you.

And finally let him out of your heart, including out of your hate.
Hating him is still a feeling.

Feeling nothing for a stranger--
well, that's worse for him. And better for you and your mom.

[Cross666]

<--- Dad cheated on my mother during their honeymoon, then afterwards created me. She found out. Didn't meet him 'til i was 4. Started visiting him when I was 8. He ran off and ditched his other son *2nd wife my younger bro* when I was 14. I'm 20 now, he was a pretty successful guy, but just got too into drugs and women and kept blowing it. I remembered when he used to make 6 figures and now when I needed real support during my college years, of course he's nowhere to be seen.

You're not alone.

But at the same time, be glad you had the opportunity to have a mom that gives a shit and you turned out alright.

[GiantDouche]

Man your dad is a fucking pimp. Got bitches ALL OVER his dick. Sheeeeet.

[PeterM]

I think you should be a bit more compassionate guys...

[Warforger]

Fuck that shit

This guy's dad is fucking bitches and getting money, he's a pimp.

[XIII13]

At 1/29/10 12:24 AM, Diddy wrote: I think you should be a bit more compassionate guys...

Oh come on. This is internet. Besides, at least it's not 4chan.

[HazeStigma]

Well, me and my father had a relationship, canoodled and then she was preggerz with me.
My father split up with her right there and then really since he didn't want a child and im fine with that.
If he doesn't want me, i dont want him, i've never known him so why should i feel sad?

[Head-Full-Of-Acid]

At 1/29/10 12:42 AM, HazeStigma wrote: Well, me and my father had a relationship, canoodled and then she was preggerz with me.

..I think I read that wrong.

[slayer1029]

Thank you to the few people who actually replied legitimately. Its good to know that other people have gone through similar things, and I thank you for sharing it with me.

To all you people who seem to be under the impression that my father was a pimp, screw off. Having children and being an unfaithful bitch doesn't make you a pimp or any more of a man. It makes you a weak and pathetic person willing to deceive and manipulate others for your own sick enjoyment. It makes you less of a man if anything. Ask yourself how you'd feel in my situation. Would you think of him as a pimp? No, you'd see him for the asshole he is. But of course, nobody can be serious over the internet.

[Ragnarokia]

At 1/29/10 01:14 AM, slayer1029 wrote: It makes you a weak and pathetic person willing to deceive and manipulate others for your own sick enjoyment.

That's what makes him a pimp.

[slayer1029]

At 1/29/10 01:17 AM, Ragnarokia wrote:

At 1/29/10 01:14 AM, slayer1029 wrote: It makes you a weak and pathetic person willing to deceive and manipulate others for your own sick enjoyment.

That's what makes him a pimp.

I just want it to be understood that its not a good thing...

[BrainlessDan]

That would mean you are a "love child".

[Thracian]

At 1/29/10 12:03 AM, slayer1029 wrote: But I'm thankful I'm his polar opposite.

He's a pimp (inductor, replacing emotions and irrationality with power) while you're a ho (addicted to emotions rather than reality).

[Pure-Metal-UTA]

I don't know if anyone else said this, knock on his door and make sure that his wife is there when you say that you're his kid, how you found out, and everything, be sure to tell his wife as well. Once you've done that, you will most likely completely ruin his life.
That would be a big FUCK YOU to his face.

[NeverHundred]

See this is why I can get along with my dad. I don't agree with his philosophy or his politics, but he never purposefully did anything that was all that terrible to me or my siblings.... Well he did vote for Bush twice.

[iwantbrainz]

Omg that is just terrible god bless you

[Encypo]

olo bastard child

[Andsoitbegins]

That's gotta suck man.
Although for all you know, this guy's other family may have found out years ago and now every night he cries alone in a motel knowing he lost everything because of his dick, contemplating suicide only to pussy out and repeat tommorow.

Well let's hope anyway.

[PandaCakeMonster]

Your 17. I'd beat the shit out of that asshole if I were you. Physicly and mentaly.

[foamymaster1479]

At 1/29/10 02:38 AM, Pure-Metal-UTA wrote: I don't know if anyone else said this, knock on his door and make sure that his wife is there when you say that you're his kid, how you found out, and everything, be sure to tell his wife as well. Once you've done that, you will most likely completely ruin his life.
That would be a big FUCK YOU to his face.

I have to be agree with this statement. If you really are that angry with your father and you feel the need to "get back at him", then you need to destroy his world and realize what he missed out on. Remember that not only did he abandon you and your mother, but he at one point was dishonest with his first family, and who knows, I'm sure he has done this sort of thing on many occasions. The other family has the right to know and since you are now old enough that he can't forcefully get any sort of custody you and your mother have nothing to lose telling his other family. If he feels like you were the mistake, prove to him that he is the mistake.

[tomsuckedmyshlong]

my father never wanted me, he ditched my mum and me, he never paid child suport, and in the whole 16 years of my life he never once has even tried to find me, i spent the last year of my life looking for him to see what sort of person he was, he has a wife and is raising her child, he has 5 children of his own yet he has nothing to do with any of them and is raising another womans child, rather wrong in my opinion.

i knocked on his door and shocked him, saw him once and after that i never heard from him again.

look man, your going to college for what ever reason, your going to be succesful, and he will never be appart of that, take pleasure knowing that.

i mean, i am in a band, never told him that, i wanted to look like a regular average joe to see if he could see me as a son or something he considers to be worthless, little does he know that me and my band have many facilities, free acces to a recording studio (good conections :)) and people who have offered us gigs when we start wrighting our own stuff and not just doing covers, i am doing this so one day i will be noticed on tv, he will see me and go "thats my son", he will try use it as a way to impress people and when he finaly invites me to see him, i am going to make sure its a huge family gathering, tell him to his face how much of a low life worthless sack of shit he is, punch him in the face, get in my car and drive off.

and revenge is not a childish thing, when ever someone does anything to me the only way i can ever move on is by feeling my own self justice, knowing getting back at someone makes the feel just as bad if not worse than me

go for it, kick the shit out of your ol' man

[slayer1029]

I was contemplating the exact same thing Pure Metal UTA mentioned. It only seemed fair that she be made aware of his actions. It would be ultimate revenge on him, even though it would cause the family a ton of grief. It would be his own fault though...

I really hope that I can get into national headlines somehow, for doing some groundbreaking thing. I want him to see my name and squirm inside because he is forced to remember what he's done. And then if he ever tries to reach out to me, its a perfect opportunity to abandon him. Sweet revenge.
Thank you guys for your input.

[Ragnarokia]

At 1/29/10 09:57 AM, slayer1029 wrote: I really hope that I can get into national headlines somehow, for doing some groundbreaking thing. I want him to see my name and squirm inside because he is forced to remember what he's done. And then if he ever tries to reach out to me, its a perfect opportunity to abandon him. Sweet revenge.

Like father like son.

[slayer1029]

At 1/29/10 10:00 AM, Ragnarokia wrote: Like father like son.

Paybacks a bitch. But theres a difference between telling your father who abandoned you to fuck off and you never wanna see him again, and abandoning a woman and two children because you've been leading a double life. Also, I didn't threaten to kidnap him.

[Freaki-boy92]

at least you didn't get to know your father before he buggered off...

[Elixur]

Although personally I haven't gone through this kind of situation, I can imagine the feeling of resentment you have for him. Atleast you now know the truth and can finally push him out of your life for good. Any man that does the things he has done isn't a real man, in my eyes.

All you can do is never speak to him and lead a better life than he.