Introductory paragraphs, need help

[stimcrab]

These are the introductory paragraphs to a novel I'm writing. It's a first person narrative, sorta like Catcher in the Rye and a little dash of V. by Thomas Pynchon. Anyway, I think my first few paragraphs are okay, but they also need a bit of work. I might post more if I get enough reviews. So here goes!

Well, I suppose I should start with how I got my name. My mom was a big reader and she just had to name me David, after David Copperfield. I don't know why in hell you'd name a kid after David Copperfield. Anyway, everyone just called me Davey anyways. It's just easier. Yep, I was Davey Pound, and I was a little white kid who lived in the second worst part of Centurion City, Delaware, Collegiate Estates. The worst happened to be under the General Holtfield Memorial Bridge. The house that belonged to my mother was never really well taken care of; ivy grew all the way up our chimney, and a family of possums lived under the expansive front porch.
For as long as I could remember, the Yellow Neck Golf Association, the local country club, had tried to encroach on our back yard, which I was totally fine with. It added a touch of class to our little shit-hole. From my bedroom's window, you could see the 6th hole on the back nine of the Old Course, or, as it was called by the club, Svenson Point. Some days, when I was really young, I remember staring at the members, as if they were animals, through the perpetually murky glass of the window. The part of the hole you could see the best was the green. I knew that green better than all of the members combined, and it was a bitch. Some days it tilted to the right, then the left, and you could never forget the donut wrapping the hole.

So thank you for reading, everyone. Please review fairly!

[InsertFunnyUserName]

I think my main problem with this is that it is a first-person narrative, but yet the writing doesn't have that much voice. It's descriptive and does a good job of painting the scene, but it does so in more of an omniscient third-person narration rather than a story that you'd here someone tell you of their life. And that seems out of place being that you're using phrases like "I suppose I should start..." and "as long as I can remember..."

Aside from that, what you decided to start with is a good opening. It sets the scene for the character's background and that's a good way of starting a novel like this.

[TrevorW]

I love CatR.

I'd start it out like this.

Hey you. Yeah YOU. Fuck you.
But hey, listen:

I might not be a young man worth listening to, but hey when you have a gun to your head people tend to listen anyways. I don't even have to make sense -- assholes have to listen to the poor suicidal boy. I mean come on, if they didn't listen to me I might just die! What a joke. People will fall for just about anything if you have that look in your eyes. The look of the defeated. Assholes.