Jenxy's Shix

[Kajenx]

So I thought I'd start a thread. I'm not sure what I'm going to post here, but I'm expecting a mix of poems and short stories/scenes. I'm not going to post older work because I need the practice, I haven't done much writing recently. D:

Here's a poem I wrote today. I wasn't expecting it, but I'm rather fond of it.

Rotting on the Vine

Your cheek,
Like an apple blossom,
Not pink or soft,
But thin,
And vivid,
And lustful;
A touch of glazed red
On white ground,
A hint of fire beneath walls of cracked snow
Longing for corruption.

Your hair,
A void of blackness,
That moves like oiled snakes,
Writhing in a dance of coiling
Pleasure
Across the subtle sinews of your form.
A thick curtain to hide
The machinations of a soiled mind
That waits,
Expectant,
Beneath a frame of forged dignity.

Your lips,
Ripe, like a plum
Filled to bursting with
Juices.
A lushed form;
Parted in welcome
Of fear,
And longing,
For lost and gained wisdoms.

Your eyes,
Dark pools made for drowning,
That pull with a glassy depth,
And a damp warmth,
That magnify the essence
Of your guilty confidence.

My wants,
Wrapped in your existence,
Twined around your fingers,
A moment of ideas
That turn my mind to shivers,
And expect never to be fulfilled.

[Kajenx]

Also, feel free to be brutally critical. :3

[NekoMika]

Well it sounds like you wrote a poem about someone you love deeply, if you do then go for it but if you already got them then maybe they would actually enjoy this poem. really enjoy how you just seemed to be going over detail with each piece of their features you really enjoyed. Nice piece of poetry.

[Kajenx]

Thanks! It's actually about someone I knew from a long time ago... :3

[Kajenx]

Here's a letter I'd never like to get.

Dear Mr. Arnie,

I'm writing to you to tell you that your wife has passed away. Don't worry, though, we'll dig a hole and drop her in it, as per your requests. There was a bit of an argument over the size of the hole, as it wasn't stipulated in the will and someone suggested it would be much faster if we chopped her into small pieces. The argument went on until we realized we could just tip her down the old well and save the time that way. Of course, I'm sure you won't mind but I felt the need to mention for legal reasons.

I must also inquire about your children, have you seen them? It's regrettable, but we seem to have lost them and thought they might have turned up at your door, the little rascals. We set the dogs loose to sniff them out, but they didn't come back until a few days later. One of them had a sock caught in its teeth, and I have to admit, he looked rather satisfied despite his failure. We'll keep an eye out in case they turn up, but until then we're going to sleep in their beds, as we've soiled ours after bouts of heavy drinking.

In any case, I hope you're having a lovely vacation, and thank you, again, for using Neg and Lectful house-sitting services!

Dr. Neg Ligent

[TrevorW]

It is late so I only glanced, but you sir are very visual. This is good. I will have to fully read and think about these words later! Good night.

[Kajenx]

Alright, here's one more. This one is older (I know I said I wasn't going to), but I think it represents the best of my work from a few years ago. Anyway, I made some minor changes, so that makes it new. :3

Nutmeg

Rabbits dancing on a hilltop.
Light steps fill the breeze
With that sweet smell
Hidden beneath the clover
Or residing under the rotting logs
Of an aging forest.
I envy the worm
Who bathes in the dark scent
Of clean soil and polished sand,
Making meals of mossy salad
And cool black earth
That is always hidden
In the most obvious of places;
Deep beneath the grass
Or the roots of wizened trees
Who know nothing of spice.

[TrevorW]

I think you are so right, because I find it very hard to understand you visual approach. Interesting how an artist can vary so much with another.

At any rate, I am going to reread them again but they read great. The imagery is wonderful. (expect a detailed response later)

[megakill]

At 1/29/10 04:01 AM, Kajenx wrote:

Nutmeg

This is a great piece because of its simplicity. There is nothing particularly intricate about it; its form reflects its message of life and purity.
Everything this poem speaks of knows nothing of the troubles and stress of the outside world, and is perfectly happy with the way things of. I really think your understated use of language helps to emphasize upon this message.
Good job!

[Kajenx]

He was alone, sitting in a deep silence that pressed in from the surrounding trees. It wasn't the silence of nothingness, but that of wind moving in some far off place and the low hum of sleeping earth. Half sitting, half laying, on a slope among a crowd of dazzling fall maples, the sunlight streamed in through the leaves and broke into red and yellow patterns that whispered, dreamlike, across his skin. With the spicy sent of loam and mildew drifting up from his leafy nest, and the chill air transforming his breath into a crackling frost, he let his mind wander far away up among the wispy drifting clouds and out over the sparkling lake that twinkled every now and again through a gap between the peeling silvery trunks.

Here, in this mystic palace of the fey, he found solace from a word of logic and order where he could call to the winds and speak to the presence around him. He waved his hand idly above his head and watched as the trees shivered in his airy symphony, blowing back and forth in a lazy rhythm that seemed to belie a sense of intelligence in their movements. But, of course, these trees were wise, and knew more of the secrets of the earth than he did. When he talked to them, on the days when he could abandon all but the present moment, they spoke of patience and patterns, cycles of life, and endless watching. They were guardians of memory, and they waited, always waited, for an endless nothing that never came. To them the world was always changing, but movement was slow and broad and final. They didn't understand him when he spoke of living, for they were creatures of stillness and quiet, content in their permanence.

Then there were the squirrels, they understood him better, perhaps because they knew his world. He would always laugh when he saw them hanging precariously from their back toes, trying to reach the bird feeders. Here they felt freer, as he did, and humanity's omnipresence wasn't so telling in their movements. They would often shout insults at him, when they felt safe high among the branches, and try to throw maple seeds onto his head; but he would just laugh as the breeze sent them whirling away like helicopters. They would laugh too once they realized their stupidity, their obnoxious voices ringing out through the trees; but they would always try again.

The birds were different. They were shy and curious, and sometime if he brought them stale bread they would pick at it a little distance away as he watched them, jumping down from a low branch once they'd worked up the nerve, only to flit away quickly in a wildly joyful fear, a bit of bread clamped in their beak. The birds understood the world differently, like the trees. Their realm was not limited by obstacles, and their freedom was fragile; constantly challenged by real and imagined fears. Thus it is with all small creatures, though, more suited to running away than fighting. The boy often felt like that.

After a long while the sun had sunk into red twilight and the boy got to his feet and slowly walked home. With a whisper of longing for warmth and comfort, the last leaves left clinging to his jacket slowly drifted back to the forest floor and were still.

It was silent.

[Version2]

At 1/28/10 12:03 AM, Kajenx wrote: Your hair,
A void of blackness,
That moves like oiled snakes,

Something tells me a girl doesn't want to be told her hair is oily :P

In all seriousness, I like your free verse, it flows nicely and has good structure.

I really liked that letter you wrote, very funny :) I think you should write more like that. Actually, everybody should lol, got a lot of dark writing going on in the writing forums right now.

[Kajenx]

Thanks for the positive feedback!

I just realized that my last piece was incredibly verbose in the first paragraph. Rest assured I've deleted a few of the double adjectives, especially in this sentence:

"With the spicy sent of loam and mildew drifting up from his leafy nest, and the chill air transforming his breath into a crackling frost, he let his mind wander far away up among the wispy clouds and out over the lake that twinkled every now and again through a gap between the peeling trunks."

I think that's much better... lol...