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MonkeyV
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Response to Writing Forum Lounge Apr. 14th, 2010 @ 10:14 PM Reply

Hey guys.
What would you think of a story featuring a guy who wakes up every morning, remembering the world to be very different than how it actually is? This guy will be aware that he is simply having memory problems, and not that everything is actually changing around him.

For example, and this is meant to be funny even though the story will not necessarily be:

"Woke up this morning, and all the stop signs were octagonal. It will take me a while to get used to them not being circles anymore."

Also the story won't be as blunt.
It will be told, obviously, in the past tense, so the reader will get to experience the changes along with him. For example, he could wake up one day to find that the dog which he remembers having owned and loved his whole life never actually existed.

Just a thought (Well not really. I've already started writing it), but what are your opinions? Also are there already any stories you know of that use this idea?


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megakill
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Response to Writing Forum Lounge Apr. 14th, 2010 @ 10:23 PM Reply

At 4/14/10 10:14 PM, MonkeyV wrote: Hey guys.
What would you think of a story featuring a guy who wakes up every morning, remembering the world to be very different than how it actually is? This guy will be aware that he is simply having memory problems, and not that everything is actually changing around him.

I think this is a pretty good idea, and personally, I think you could twist it into a really good dramatic piece, illustrating how slowly all the things and people has loved and cared about are slowly being taken away from him. Think of how that could seriously twist a man, and the ways you could develop it! Damn I wish I had this idea. But, I'm all doom and gloom in my writing, whereas I think you said you could make it a comedy piece. I think that would work well too, although personally I don't know how you could go about writing it.

Anyway, I like the idea, and I'm definitely going to give it a read!

MonkeyV
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Response to Writing Forum Lounge Apr. 14th, 2010 @ 10:43 PM Reply

At 4/14/10 10:23 PM, megakill wrote:

Damn I wish I had this idea. But, I'm all doom and gloom in my writing, whereas I think you said you could make it a comedy piece. I think that would work well too, although personally I don't know how you could go about writing it.

Oh, no, I'm definitely going to make it a tragedy ;)
Just the example was comedic because it's the first thing that came to mind. I actually hope to submit it to the anthology thing that GumOnShoe is setting up.

Here's a draft of the first paragraph, which I wrote on paper earlier today when I was bored and waiting in my dad's van after I got picked up from school. Sort of like an intro. (I'm not going to be posting any more of it after this, though)

"I woke up one morning, and the sky was blue. It was unbelievable. Outrageous. The most miraculous thing I had ever seen up to that point. That's quite an accomplishment, considering the amount of absurdity I've experienced in my time here on Earth. Can you imagine something as gigantic and imposing as the sky, just suddenly changing in such a dramatic way? Maybe you can't see how it would be such a big deal, but let me tell you something: One can never truly understand what a huge part of life the sky is until they can't stop looking at it.
But anyway..."

I'll probably change it around, but I like it for now (Possibly get rid of "Outrageous." I dunno)


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Nothins
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Response to Writing Forum Lounge Apr. 14th, 2010 @ 11:37 PM Reply

how many of you like fast moving storied, or stories that move slow, but are incredably detailed about sight smell touch ect. ect. ?


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MonkeyV
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Response to Writing Forum Lounge Apr. 15th, 2010 @ 12:14 AM Reply

At 4/14/10 11:37 PM, nothingmater wrote: stories that move slow, but are incredably detailed about sight smell touch ect. ect. ?

I find those very annoying actually (Maybe because nobody ever does it right?). It might work if all of the extra description doesn't feel arbitrary.


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Nothins
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Response to Writing Forum Lounge Apr. 15th, 2010 @ 12:31 AM Reply

i think i do good at them :o


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iCurrie
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Response to Writing Forum Lounge Apr. 15th, 2010 @ 12:35 AM Reply

I was wondering, I knew of one a few years ago but haven't been able to remember it since.

What are some writing admission websites? Notable ones. You know, for poetry, stories, etc. Where you just submit them and they get rated and commented, etc. Any ideas? I can't think of any.

If anyone uses Newgrounds as an example, I will gut you.
TrevorW
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Response to Writing Forum Lounge Apr. 15th, 2010 @ 06:50 AM Reply

At 4/15/10 12:35 AM, iCurrie wrote:
If anyone uses Newgrounds as an example, I will gut you.

What do you want? We have some great reviewers on NG.


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Nothins
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Response to Writing Forum Lounge Apr. 15th, 2010 @ 10:44 AM Reply

well you know, newgrounds does that :p

nah just look in google, for somethign like "writtign submission sites"


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sinfulwolf
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Response to Writing Forum Lounge Apr. 15th, 2010 @ 10:49 AM Reply

fanfiction.net for fanfiction, and fictionpress.com for original work. Adultfanfiction.net for original and fanfiction for stories with lots of sex in it.

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Response to Writing Forum Lounge Apr. 15th, 2010 @ 12:24 PM Reply

At 4/15/10 06:50 AM, TrevorW wrote:
At 4/15/10 12:35 AM, iCurrie wrote:
If anyone uses Newgrounds as an example, I will gut you.
What do you want? We have some great reviewers on NG.

Yeah, but I think what iCurrie refers to is more along the lines of a writing portal, somewhere where you can put your piece up, have a rating and reviews appear for it.

Most places that you find to host your works online will tend to be governed by a group of cliques, which have their own favoured pieces. It is difficult to break past them if you're slightly different.

To add to sinfulwolf's list, I'd say literotica.com for exclusively erotic fiction, but it's just an outlet, as opposed to somewhere where you can put down high quality writing, save for some of thefeedback, which can be helpful.


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Abuelodigital17
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Response to Writing Forum Lounge Apr. 15th, 2010 @ 03:07 PM Reply

At 4/14/10 11:37 PM, nothingmater wrote: how many of you like fast moving storied, or stories that move slow, but are incredably detailed about sight smell touch ect. ect. ?

I prefer stories which have a balanced amount of action and description, and fast paced stories over slow moving ones.


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Coop
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Response to Writing Forum Lounge Apr. 15th, 2010 @ 03:23 PM Reply

At 4/15/10 03:07 PM, Abuelodigital17 wrote:
At 4/14/10 11:37 PM, nothingmater wrote: how many of you like fast moving storied, or stories that move slow, but are incredably detailed about sight smell touch ect. ect. ?
I prefer stories which have a balanced amount of action and description, and fast paced stories over slow moving ones.

I used to write in a style like that - perhaps I should revisit it in some way, but we'll see how things pan out. With the next few competitions, I might just have a few bits and pieces like this up my sleeves.


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Imperator
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Response to Writing Forum Lounge Apr. 15th, 2010 @ 03:47 PM Reply

At 4/15/10 12:24 PM, Coop83 wrote:
At 4/15/10 06:50 AM, TrevorW wrote:
At 4/15/10 12:35 AM, iCurrie wrote:
If anyone uses Newgrounds as an example, I will gut you.
What do you want? We have some great reviewers on NG.
Yeah, but I think what iCurrie refers to is more along the lines of a writing portal, somewhere where you can put your piece up, have a rating and reviews appear for it.

I smell Writing Portal......for NG.

Seriously. We have one for audio, art, and flash. The setup would be the same for writing. Just upload files in PDF or something that NG will display, vote, and comment. Writing Forum could be used for general discussion, and discussion on works in more depth than the review system allows.

As is, the writing forum is being used AS IF it was a writing portal, so I really don't see why not.

Would solve a lot of the formatting and special character problems we run across with the bbs as well.

Shit, if I had ANY knowledge of website experience, I'd volunteer to put in the work myself. Copy-paste the flash portal, and put "writing" at the top instead. DONE.

Yes, my web-design knowledge is just that limited.....but it couldn't be that hard to set up, could it?

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sinfulwolf
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Response to Writing Forum Lounge Apr. 15th, 2010 @ 03:49 PM Reply

It's in the works Imperator, and has been the source of some overly heated discussion in this very forum. Some might be a bit pissy at it being brought up once again in here, even if you didn't know about those discussions or plans.

As for fast or slow stories... I'd say fast, but not so fast in that I don't know what's going on, or what the place is like. A good balance between action and setting is what I like.

Imperator
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Response to Writing Forum Lounge Apr. 15th, 2010 @ 04:04 PM Reply

At 4/15/10 03:49 PM, sinfulwolf wrote: It's in the works Imperator, and has been the source of some overly heated discussion in this very forum. Some might be a bit pissy at it being brought up once again in here, even if you didn't know about those discussions or plans.

Ahhhh woops....

As for fast or slow stories... I'd say fast, but not so fast in that I don't know what's going on, or what the place is like. A good balance between action and setting is what I like.

As usual, the most difficult thing to achieve is probably the most aesthetically pleasing.....

The thing I find is that sometimes, when done right, "pace" has little to do with "length". I've read action sequences that were very well put together, highly detailed, but the "pace" of the action was very quick, and it read quite easily.

at the same time, I've read works with high intensity action sequences that were completely mundane and lacking any color at all. I think it's because they believed "action" and "fast" meant "verb, verb, verb, VERB, verb, verb, verb, noun". They threw 25 verbs into 4 sentences, and ended up rushing through the scene.

I like high detail generally. But I like high detail in action sequences almost more than other sequences. "Battle" scenes are my cue here. IMO, a good "battle" scene is fast paced, but very descriptive as well. Some scenes, which in the story take place in 30 seconds or a couple of minutes, go on for an entire chapter, but are quite detailed and real page turners.

5 paragraphs on how a tree sways in the breeze as one walks by, on the other hand.....snore-ville.

So balance and context is really the deciding issue I guess. I prefer more detail when there's more action, less detail when there's less action.

All in all, I find books boring when I get no feel for the situation, and that usually is due to there being so little detail, the plot simply passes from action to action, verb to verb. I've always believed erring on the side of caution would be to give too much detail, rather than too little.


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sinfulwolf
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Response to Writing Forum Lounge Apr. 15th, 2010 @ 04:11 PM Reply

At 4/15/10 04:04 PM, Imperator wrote:

As usual, the most difficult thing to achieve is probably the most aesthetically pleasing.....

The thing I find is that sometimes, when done right, "pace" has little to do with "length". I've read action sequences that were very well put together, highly detailed, but the "pace" of the action was very quick, and it read quite easily.

at the same time, I've read works with high intensity action sequences that were completely mundane and lacking any color at all. I think it's because they believed "action" and "fast" meant "verb, verb, verb, VERB, verb, verb, verb, noun". They threw 25 verbs into 4 sentences, and ended up rushing through the scene.

I like high detail generally. But I like high detail in action sequences almost more than other sequences. "Battle" scenes are my cue here. IMO, a good "battle" scene is fast paced, but very descriptive as well. Some scenes, which in the story take place in 30 seconds or a couple of minutes, go on for an entire chapter, but are quite detailed and real page turners.

5 paragraphs on how a tree sways in the breeze as one walks by, on the other hand.....snore-ville.

So balance and context is really the deciding issue I guess. I prefer more detail when there's more action, less detail when there's less action.

All in all, I find books boring when I get no feel for the situation, and that usually is due to there being so little detail, the plot simply passes from action to action, verb to verb. I've always believed erring on the side of caution would be to give too much detail, rather than too little.

Agreed whole heartedly. I've read many things where the actions were simple, and it didn't captivate me very much. Action is not an easy thing to do, and the larger the scale the more difficult it can become to capture the attention and properly show the reader what's happening.

I've tried a few battle sequences, only one of which is available here on Newgrounds (Chapter 2 of my War of the Damned story), and I'm not entirely sure how I feel about it after the fact.

I could go on, should go on about fights themselves, but they are only an aspect of the original question pertaining to fast and slow.

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Response to Writing Forum Lounge Apr. 17th, 2010 @ 12:08 AM Reply

So how is everyone?


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Response to Writing Forum Lounge Apr. 17th, 2010 @ 01:53 AM Reply

At 4/17/10 12:08 AM, TrevorW wrote: So how is everyone?

Pretty good. How bout you Trevor? How are you?

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Response to Writing Forum Lounge Apr. 17th, 2010 @ 12:12 PM Reply

oye. Hello Trevor. I'm *twitch twitch* awesome! the coffee injected directly into my veins is awesome. i always like being direct...or just crazy. EXAMS ARE AWESOME! I wake up screaming, then i fall back to sleep...

actually, all feigned insanity aside, an active imagination leads to a very active subconscious (or so i heard). This leads to a sub-par sleep, as your subconscious is more vigorous. So, that being said, does anyone here have unrestful night?or nights?


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sinfulwolf
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Response to Writing Forum Lounge Apr. 17th, 2010 @ 03:12 PM Reply

I have enough of em. Dreams and such.

PinballWizard976
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Response to Writing Forum Lounge Apr. 17th, 2010 @ 08:24 PM Reply

I have an idea that i'd like to bounce off of you guys if that's cool.

I was driving down interstate 79 today, and i saw a lot of dead animals. (this isn't my writing btw. i really did drive down i-79; went up to edinboro university by lake erie, to look at an open house for an art education degree). But yeah, there was a lot of dead possums and such, i saw a dead deer, countless rats, and a lot of birds that swooped down right in front of my car, and flew back up towards the sky again.

So this is where i got the idea of having a group of animals on one end of a highway, and crossing (or trying to anyways) the road. I want it to be dark in its theme, and almost cruel in its word choice. There would be two 'factions' so to say. the animals and the birds. The birds, as a group, would be the antagonist, whereas the animals/possums would not necessarily be the protaganist, but rather, they would defy the birds. You wouldn't be 'rooting for' one side or the other while reading it, but there will definitely be a conflict between the two.

I'm thinking i want i to be told from the point of view of either a possum or possibly a crow. I'm not sure. I'll experiment in my notebook, see which one works best. Or maybe I'll intoduce a third party. Like a farmer's black shaggy old dog or something. That like, laughs in a crackly old voice or something at the two groups.

So I guess i can post a rough draft in here or on a thread or wherever. I'm pretty excited about it.

TrevorW
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Response to Writing Forum Lounge Apr. 17th, 2010 @ 11:33 PM Reply

At 4/17/10 01:53 AM, sinfulwolf wrote:
At 4/17/10 12:08 AM, TrevorW wrote: So how is everyone?
Pretty good. How bout you Trevor? How are you?

Great thanks. Haven't been doing a lot of writing but life is good :)


Failure should push you until success can pull you.

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munio
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Response to Writing Forum Lounge Apr. 18th, 2010 @ 07:12 AM Reply

At 4/17/10 08:24 PM, PinballWizard976 wrote:
I'm thinking i want i to be told from the point of view of either a possum or possibly a crow. I'm not sure. I'll experiment in my notebook, see which one works best. Or maybe I'll intoduce a third party. Like a farmer's black shaggy old dog or something. That like, laughs in a crackly old voice or something at the two groups.

So I guess i can post a rough draft in here or on a thread or wherever. I'm pretty excited about it.

if you want a third party you can perhaps go for an flightless bird, such as a penguin or a kiwi
Not sure if it's that original try to push the methaphor out a little


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sinfulwolf
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Response to Writing Forum Lounge Apr. 18th, 2010 @ 07:48 AM Reply

At 4/17/10 11:33 PM, TrevorW wrote:
At 4/17/10 01:53 AM, sinfulwolf wrote:
At 4/17/10 12:08 AM, TrevorW wrote: So how is everyone?
Pretty good. How bout you Trevor? How are you?
Great thanks. Haven't been doing a lot of writing but life is good :)

Life being good is the more important bit. If I'm not writing much, I'm striving to make life good once again, though of course, writing does help me with, excess baggage.

TrevorW
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Response to Writing Forum Lounge Apr. 18th, 2010 @ 06:00 PM Reply

At 4/18/10 07:48 AM, sinfulwolf wrote:

Try new things!

Anyways, guys, make sure to check out the poetry battles! Been a little slow lately.


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Response to Writing Forum Lounge Apr. 28th, 2010 @ 06:13 AM Reply

I have to re-write a complete chapter of my Novel.

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Response to Writing Forum Lounge Apr. 28th, 2010 @ 07:47 AM Reply

I'm not going to have a huge post, my eyes feel like sultanas right now. In short.

Has anyone in here read Enders Game?


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Response to Writing Forum Lounge Apr. 28th, 2010 @ 09:30 AM Reply

At 4/28/10 07:47 AM, JackCurrie wrote: I'm not going to have a huge post, my eyes feel like sultanas right now. In short.

Has anyone in here read Enders Game?

Yea it's a great book ;)


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munio
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Response to Writing Forum Lounge Apr. 28th, 2010 @ 05:06 PM Reply

finally finished my entry for the battles, god it took me such a long time to make and it's still absolutley crap


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