I have lost my sense of humanity. Or, am losing it. I feel it down to my core. Apathy has turned into resentment, sympathy into intolerance. I smile to peoples face, then mutter swears under my breath as I walk away. 'Dumb fuck.', 'Ugly cunt.', 'Faggot.'. I was a fairly tolerant man for awhile and I was fully aware of the human condition. I understood those less fortunate and those who were ignorant. Now, I merely resent those that I don't fully understand.
It's deeper than just a simple uncaring attitude towards humans on an individual nature. It's a resentment of society and an unwillingness to see the good in humanity, even if I know somewhere it's there, hidden behind their betrayals and petty nature. I would rather see the entire world ended in a blaze of hot dust and hellfire than to see another generation be brought into this world, to slowly have their innocence stripped from them.
I don't even care about who I am as a human. I'm not suicidal, but I don't really care if I'm alive. I appreciate life on occasion, but as a whole I find it a very unsatisfying experience. More than likely because I know that the same people I call dumb fucks, cunts and faggots do the exact same thing to me. Or maybe they don't...
I don't understand humans on such a basic level. How does that happen? I've been alive for 18 years now and I don't understand the very basic of human function. What went so wrong in my mind or societies collective that I would not understand such basic attitudes towards one another? A generation raised on drugs can't function without them, I suppose.
Opinions on what went so tragically wrong as for many in society to lose faith and touch in and with humanity. Or why you think I'm a whiny little child, or why I am dead wrong. Reaffirm my belief in humanity.