So This Hooker Picked Up Me

[JoS]

There I was, standing beside my car minding my own business when out of no where this hooker shows up. He walks rigth up to me and says "Hey big boy, need a tow?"

I figured what the hell, my tire was flat if you know what I mean, and I had never done this before. So I asked, "How much?"

The hooker replied, "Since you are from out of town I will give you a discount, $200."

Since I was new to this I figured I should find out what I was getting myself into. "What am I getting for $200" I asked naively.

The hooker let off a little bit of a laugh and said "For $200 I'll hook you up, take your car someplace nice and give you a ride too."

This night was suddenly looking much better than it was ten minutes ago. I started off going nowhere fast, and now my heart was racing, getting a ride from this hooker. The hooker smelled of disel but I was in no position to complain.

When he lowered my hood again and let me go he smiled, shook my hand and gave me his number. "My name is earl, if you ever need someone to look under your hood again, you give me a call."

[SimpleStuff]

So, this Earl fellow would check my engine too?

[Funkybob2]

HAHA! DOUBLE ENTENEDRE!

[Knights]

Why do I feel like I'm in some 70's porno?

[Prinzy2]

I expected so much better from you.

No happy ending?

[bdash1990]

Oooh you're makin' me hot....

[Rooster]

Wow, 200 dollars? Last time I was hooked I only paid 65 dollars.

You must have gotten a great hooker.

[gibleto]

I'd let him tow my truck.

All night long

[AnonymousAlchemist]

10/10. I didn't see it immediately. Loved that story.

[toughy]

At 11/29/09 01:37 AM, NintendoClock wrote: i had sex with ahooker once she looekd lik this

omg would you go the fuck away!!?

[Kiryuku]

At 11/29/09 01:37 AM, NintendoClock wrote: i had sex with ahooker once she looekd lik this

You are a disgrace to clocks everywhere.

[Feldrawn]

HO HO! Double Shanghai Suprise!

[GiantDouche]

LOL IT'S FUNNY BECAUSE IT'S NOT REALLY A HOOKER BUT A MECHANIC INSTEAD LOL.

[CalumnJohnston]

At 11/29/09 12:46 AM, JoS wrote: He walks rigth up to me

...stop right there

[Pessimistic]

Would read again.

[MonkeyV]

At 11/29/09 02:16 AM, GiantDouche wrote: LOL IT'S FUNNY BECAUSE IT'S NOT REALLY A HOOKER BUT A MECHANIC INSTEAD LOL.

LOL YOU MISSED THE JOKE BECAUSE HE IS A HOOKER IN THE SENSE THAT HE'S A TOW-TRUCK DRIVER WHO HOOKS UP CARS, NO A MECHANIC LOL.

[ilikeblamingcrap]

At 11/29/09 12:51 AM, knightsofthecircle wrote: Why do I feel like I'm in some 70's porno?

Because this IS a 70's porno now. For gays.

[GoofyCatFish]

ya shoulda wacked him i tells ya! ya shoulda wacked him and took the cash and the ride.... wait a minute... that hooker looks like ricky lozano!!!

[Fantast3cles]

that was good

[Monocrom]

$200 ??

That hooker commited rape! (Of your wallet).

[formulario]

i bet he gave your trunk the hook of his life

[Head-Full-Of-Acid]

i don't trust hookers; you never know what they're hiding under their clothes.

ask him

[Lotus]

Fucking rash, 200$?!

[PuRpLe-KusH]

Thats one Sexci ass Tow Truck

[Greenfrost6]

Haha, awesome story. I didn't see that coming.

[Politics]

At 11/29/09 12:46 AM, JoS wrote: The hooker replied, "Since you are from out of town I will give you a discount, $200."

Sounds like you...

*puts on sunglasses*

Got screwed.

YEAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

[6devilsson6]

thats really gay

[OMGhaxedlol]

meh, highest i paid was 1.5g...

just got paid for a bounty for killing some chinese person... total payment: 3g D:

[JoS]

Update

Today I was having some trouble getting my engine warmed up so he came over and jump started my engine for me, got it purring like a kitten. This one was free.

[Goldfire64]

greatest thing read today!