This tramp had something seriuosly wrong with him. I mean the 5 five words you expect a tramp to say are " Have you got any change?" not "Your a looker arent ya?!".
Basically, I go home from football (soccer) every Sunday the same way, from the train, under the bridge and on the bus. And never 4 years have I seen a single person who spoke to me during this journey. Except a tramp, yesterday on the most isolated part of the journey, the under the bridge section. Now sure, if you take into account that the media are scumbags who scaremonger people into submission and into buying their useless dragged out stories (which are usually lies to be honest) then im unlikely to be raped, murdered or mugged there, but you can never be too careful. However I still dont knoow, as im typing this how the hell he got there. As far as I can see there are two ways under the bridge. You either climb under the hole in the wire fence (my way in) , or you climb the sizeable gate(my way out) now if im being blunt, which i usually am, this gguy looked about 75, and thats taking into acoount that he was a tramp, so im guessing hes not particularly nimble.
Now im not very pround of this, but i usually ignore tramps, convincing myself completely that its there fault, and never letting the thought that it may be down to society and its treatment of the poor.
Anyway, this man was kinda spralled on the floor, looking slightly drunk, and scared the living shit out of me, becuase i though he was asllep or something, and i personally feel he was as surprised as i was that someone walked passed that he made a noise, not manic enough to make me think he was mental but not sane enough to make me think he was speaking. It was a kind of blurree noise. Followed by Got any change? which is the MOST dreaded collection of words youll ever hear from a tramp (also known as a sentance), some wuld say that Im gonna cut ya is but cmon there tramps, there weaker than crackheads, the takers, not the dealers.
I replied with Nah, sorry mate, ive got a drink, cok... nevermind.
He then got up.
His quickness was unbelievable, almost admirable agility to leap off his feet and grab me by the shoulder, spinning me around the repeating in a harsher voice to that of before,
Now, have you got any change?!
No!!!
I ran like a little pussy from a bearded tramp.
Climbed that gate like never before.
Now, people say you make your deadliest mistakes when your scared.
Well that did actually turn out to be true.
I leaped over the fence and as i did my shorts got caught upon the spikes to stop people like me and it ripped my shorts, boxers everything.
In short, i ran home with my left bollock flapping about.
