Forum Topic: I wrote a song...

(122 views • 10 replies)

This topic is 1 page long.

<< < > >>
None

FeedingAdiction

Reply To Post Reply & Quote

Posted at: 10/22/09 06:37 AM

FeedingAdiction LIGHT LEVEL 05

Sign-Up: 08/04/09

Posts: 510

It's a rap song, it's quite long... Okay, I didn't mean for that to rhyme, but this time, I did, it's not a crime.. I haven't thought of a chorus yet though.
Hey man, my name is JC,
I hope I can be a star, like says Jay-Z,
I know, that my shit has wrong grammar,
so shut the fuck up, before I grab a hammer,
and fucking pound you,
until you fall on the ground,
scream "SHIT!" in your head, though it don't make a sound,
remember, it ain't an opinion til you say it,
like my opinion is my bro's a little gay and,
he just raps, drinks beer and smoke weed,
he always says pull out the stems and seeds,
remember that, when you're about to roll a joint,
or maybe a blunt-joint,
We called that a bloint,
back when, weed was the shit,
we'd smoke it,
make tea and drink it,
some times with peanut butter, we'd even eat it,
I believe, that it's called Firecrackers,
come to me, I'll make fun you your mother,
but not if you're marshall mathers,
or Jay-Z, Dr. Dre, or any of my idols,
yeah I know, it maybe kinda weird,
idolizing people in my song here,
you can, say what you want,
but I don't give a fuck, I'm a ghost, I'll haunt,
and hunt,
you down,
stick my dick up your ass crown,
making you scream "ahh! Get down!",
all I'll do is slap you in the face,
tell you to shut the fuck up, before I take off your neckbrace,
and break your neck one more time today,
But just let me say,
I don't give a fuck but hey,
maybe I'm like Eminem,
Saying things that I regret, like saying he'll kill kim,
or that slim,
is as crazy as kim,
and him,
combined,
what, you're saying that I have a bad mind,
well don't talk smack, those thoughts aren't yours, they're mine.
I'll take it outta my head and put it in yours,
make you think, that you should do my chores,
no, I don't do any of that,
But think about it, I still smoke weed and rap,
I started smoking weed at 9, you got a problem with that?
acting like you're gonna call me a twat,
well I'mma call you a nit,
and grab my medkit,
and guess what I'mma do, I'll hit you in the head with it,
Ironic, the thing that's supposed to save your life,
just took it, while I was playing flyff,
But still, I have slow internet,
so let,
me go ahead and hack it,
while you go packin',
talking as if that you could talk smack about me and,
I'll admit, you can, I got no one to protect me,
From being found dead at the sea,
Now this is pretty long,
so I'mma go ahead and and end this song.

IAMGRIMREAPER FOR MOD '09

BBS Signature

Elated

quanmandetil

Reply To Post Reply & Quote

Posted at: 10/22/09 06:40 AM

quanmandetil FAB LEVEL 07

Sign-Up: 03/05/09

Posts: 117

Very creative, and pretty funny too.

BBS Signature

None

This-Is-Freedom

Reply To Post Reply & Quote

Posted at: 10/22/09 06:40 AM

This-Is-Freedom FAB LEVEL 06

Sign-Up: 07/18/08

Posts: 141

Songs are so last year... Haiku's are the shit.

Its Discusting When Fat People Realise There Fat Only Because There Too Fat To Even kill Themselves


None

FeedingAdiction

Reply To Post Reply & Quote

Posted at: 10/22/09 06:45 AM

FeedingAdiction LIGHT LEVEL 05

Sign-Up: 08/04/09

Posts: 510

At 10/22/09 06:40 AM, quanmandetil wrote: Very creative, and pretty funny too.

Gee, thanks! :3

At 10/22/09 06:40 AM, This-Is-Freedom wrote: Songs are so last year... Haiku's are the shit.

I think I learned that
a few years ago in class
I'm sure I forgot

IAMGRIMREAPER FOR MOD '09

BBS Signature

Shouting

StarF68

Reply To Post Reply & Quote

Posted at: 10/22/09 06:47 AM

StarF68 DARK LEVEL 21

Sign-Up: 10/17/03

Posts: 10,954

Ehhh... I know it's just for fun and all but... There's just no flow, no point, no creativeness really... Sorry, it's just pretty much bad. But I guess it's okay just for a laugh or something. :|

"In the house with the laughing windows, we're spilling blood like a cheap innuendo."
Writer - Mountain Dew Addict - StarF68

BBS Signature

None

FeedingAdiction

Reply To Post Reply & Quote

Posted at: 10/22/09 06:56 AM

FeedingAdiction LIGHT LEVEL 05

Sign-Up: 08/04/09

Posts: 510

At 10/22/09 06:47 AM, StarF68 wrote: Ehhh... I know it's just for fun and all but... There's just no flow, no point, no creativeness really... Sorry, it's just pretty much bad. But I guess it's okay just for a laugh or something. :|

Man... Have you ever heard of Eminem?

IAMGRIMREAPER FOR MOD '09

BBS Signature

Shouting

StarF68

Reply To Post Reply & Quote

Posted at: 10/22/09 07:05 AM

StarF68 DARK LEVEL 21

Sign-Up: 10/17/03

Posts: 10,954

At 10/22/09 06:56 AM, FeedingAdiction wrote:
At 10/22/09 06:47 AM, StarF68 wrote: Ehhh... I know it's just for fun and all but... There's just no flow, no point, no creativeness really... Sorry, it's just pretty much bad. But I guess it's okay just for a laugh or something. :|
Man... Have you ever heard of Eminem?

I've been an amateur rapper for three and a half years and into rap for five or six, and even before I was into rap, yes, I have heard of Eminem.

Eminem has two sides, his serious side, and his "look I'm edgy" side. Now as a rapper he is talented... He has good flow, great beats, and... interesting lyrics. Personally though I can only stand his more serious stuff, his goofy side just gets to me. I don't know, I like the more poetic rappers.

My personal favorites are Sage Francis, Grieves, and Theory 77. Look into them. :)

"In the house with the laughing windows, we're spilling blood like a cheap innuendo."
Writer - Mountain Dew Addict - StarF68

BBS Signature

None

FeedingAdiction

Reply To Post Reply & Quote

Posted at: 10/22/09 07:11 AM

FeedingAdiction LIGHT LEVEL 05

Sign-Up: 08/04/09

Posts: 510

At 10/22/09 07:05 AM, StarF68 wrote: I've been an amateur rapper for three and a half years and into rap for five or six, and even before I was into rap, yes, I have heard of Eminem.

Eminem has two sides, his serious side,

Example: his song beatiful.

and his "look I'm edgy" side. Now as a rapper he is talented... He has good flow, great beats, and... interesting lyrics.

Did you know he freestyle's most of his songs?

Personally though I can only stand his more serious stuff, his goofy side just gets to me. I don't know, I like the more poetic rappers.

Yeah... That must be why you were less into my song.

My personal favorites are Sage Francis, Grieves, and Theory 77. Look into them. :)

IAMGRIMREAPER FOR MOD '09

BBS Signature

Shouting

StarF68

Reply To Post Reply & Quote

Posted at: 10/22/09 07:19 AM

StarF68 DARK LEVEL 21

Sign-Up: 10/17/03

Posts: 10,954

At 10/22/09 07:11 AM, FeedingAdiction wrote:
At 10/22/09 07:05 AM, StarF68 wrote: I've been an amateur rapper for three and a half years and into rap for five or six, and even before I was into rap, yes, I have heard of Eminem.

Eminem has two sides, his serious side,
Example: his song beatiful.

Yes yes, I'm well aware of his material. My favorite song is "The Way I Am."

and his "look I'm edgy" side. Now as a rapper he is talented... He has good flow, great beats, and... interesting lyrics.
Did you know he freestyle's most of his songs?

I can't say I knew that or that I really believe it to be true. Most people who say that mean they freestyle a general idea as a framework then work thought our lyrics around it. This may be the case.

Personally though I can only stand his more serious stuff, his goofy side just gets to me. I don't know, I like the more poetic rappers.
Yeah... That must be why you were less into my song.

Yes and no. I like a lot of rap, and a lot of it isn't poetic. I'm even into some horrorcore stuff like Boondox and Twiztid. It's because they're talented with flow, beats, and even though the lyrics aren't necessarily poetic, they are intelligently crafted and interesting. Your lyrics were not so much.

It's all a moot point though if you're just writing a song for the sake of writing a song for fun. If you really want to write songs though and get better at it as a hobby or whatever though, you've gotta keep at it and whatnot.

"In the house with the laughing windows, we're spilling blood like a cheap innuendo."
Writer - Mountain Dew Addict - StarF68

BBS Signature

None

FeedingAdiction

Reply To Post Reply & Quote

Posted at: 10/22/09 07:29 AM

FeedingAdiction LIGHT LEVEL 05

Sign-Up: 08/04/09

Posts: 510

At 10/22/09 07:19 AM, StarF68 wrote: It's all a moot point though if you're just writing a song for the sake of writing a song for fun. If you really want to write songs though and get better at it as a hobby or whatever though, you've gotta keep at it and whatnot.

Yeah man... I'm sure you can't judge Eminem from the shit he did in his album infinite, and you can't nescessarly judge me from this thing... It's my first.

IAMGRIMREAPER FOR MOD '09

BBS Signature

Shouting

StarF68

Reply To Post Reply & Quote

Posted at: 10/22/09 07:41 AM

StarF68 DARK LEVEL 21

Sign-Up: 10/17/03

Posts: 10,954

At 10/22/09 07:29 AM, FeedingAdiction wrote: Yeah man... I'm sure you can't judge Eminem from the shit he did in his album infinite, and you can't nescessarly judge me from this thing... It's my first.

Personally Infinite was my favorite of his work. :D

Also all I'm getting at is, if you want to get good, practice practice practice. :)

If you're actually serious about it, this is a fantastic forum full of talented artists who will all gladly help you along the way.

"In the house with the laughing windows, we're spilling blood like a cheap innuendo."
Writer - Mountain Dew Addict - StarF68

BBS Signature

All times are Eastern Standard Time (GMT -5) | Current Time: 02:19 PM

<< Back

This topic is 1 page long.

<< < > >>
You need a Grounds Gold Account to post on the NG BBS! If you don't have one, click here to sign up now! It's fast, free, and easy — and opens up tons of great NG features!