I've just burnt my hair and toilet

[Lorkas]

I'm a retard.

I sprayed some air freshner to the toillet and decided it was a good idea to throw a lit match there. It's quite obvious what happened afterwards. A gust of blueish fire went through me, it didn't burn much because it lasted like one nenth of a second. It burned some of my eyelashes and hair, but my eyebrows are fine. Some of my fingers sting quite a bit. Oh yeah I washed my hair to hide the scent too...

I have no idea what I'm gonna tell my mom, probably "I was trying to fry an egg, but the gas didn't light up instantly" or something.

[WeirdJamFace]

Why'd you light a match?
Was the toilet clogged by your monster sized shit?

[Ryan]

This all happened after taking a mighty shit too. Right?

[Lorkas]

At 10/6/09 03:06 AM, WeirdJamFace wrote: Why'd you light a match?
Was the toilet clogged by your monster sized shit?

I wanted to see what would happen lol. This is the last time I play with fire.

Damn.

[Head-Full-Of-Acid]

Tell her you had to burn the human hand I gave you on Christmas!

[Alec-D]

Tell her you're retarded.

[Leidolfr]

At 10/6/09 03:07 AM, Lorkas wrote:

At 10/6/09 03:06 AM, WeirdJamFace wrote: Why'd you light a match?
Was the toilet clogged by your monster sized shit?

I wanted to see what would happen lol. This is the last time I play with fire.

Damn.

now it seems like if someone was talking about losing their eyebrows and charring their toilette, they would at least have a pic, right?

An honest person, anyways

[Lorkas]

At 10/6/09 03:10 AM, Leidolfr wrote:

At 10/6/09 03:07 AM, Lorkas wrote:

At 10/6/09 03:06 AM, WeirdJamFace wrote: Why'd you light a match?
Was the toilet clogged by your monster sized shit?

I wanted to see what would happen lol. This is the last time I play with fire.

Damn.

now it seems like if someone was talking about losing their eyebrows and charring their toilette, they would at least have a pic, right?

An honest person, anyways

I said my eyebrows are fine. You wouldn't notice anything wrong about me.

I washed my hair anyways.

[Tancrisism]

At 10/6/09 03:04 AM, Lorkas wrote: I have no idea what I'm gonna tell my mom, probably "I was trying to fry an egg, but the gas didn't light up instantly" or something.

You could tell her that you are a retard, and that you sprayed some air freshner to the toilet and decided it was a good idea to throw a lit match there.

[Lorkas]

At 10/6/09 03:12 AM, Tancrisism wrote:

At 10/6/09 03:04 AM, Lorkas wrote: I have no idea what I'm gonna tell my mom, probably "I was trying to fry an egg, but the gas didn't light up instantly" or something.

You could tell her that you are a retard, and that you sprayed some air freshner to the toilet and decided it was a good idea to throw a lit match there.

LOL YEAH RIGHT...

[Leidolfr]

At 10/6/09 03:11 AM, Lorkas wrote: I said my eyebrows are fine. You wouldn't notice anything wrong about me.

I washed my hair anyways.

yeah i noticed now ya said eyelashes and not eyebrows but still, a fireball shot out of the toilette, and the toilette doesnt have a burn mark on it?

[Ryan]

At 10/6/09 03:07 AM, Lorkas wrote: I wanted to see what would happen lol. This is the last time I play with fire.

lmao

I used to melt my plastic Army Men over the stove to replicate flamethrower victims. Boy, that was fun explaining melted green plastic stuck to the new white stove.

They dripped like little fireballs and made the whole house smell awful.

[Lorkas2]

At 10/6/09 03:13 AM, Leidolfr wrote:

At 10/6/09 03:11 AM, Lorkas wrote: I said my eyebrows are fine. You wouldn't notice anything wrong about me.

I washed my hair anyways.

yeah i noticed now ya said eyelashes and not eyebrows but still, a fireball shot out of the toilette, and the toilette doesnt have a burn mark on it?

Nope, nothing. It was just gas burning out really fast I guess.

[Parlux]

I bet you learned your lesson on shit fires.

[Steff]

At 10/6/09 03:04 AM, Lorkas wrote: I'm a retard.

I stopped reading here.

[ELITE-101]

i was half expecting a long story about how you blew up you toilet and nearly survived the moleman world that was underneath it, i was disapointed

[Upyourface]

At 10/6/09 03:04 AM, Lorkas wrote: I'm a retard.

...because it lasted like one nenth of a second.

Sounds about right.

[BerzerkingApe]

Alrighty.

Congratulations sir, you get the EpicFailAward.
It's made for you.

*claps*