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Insulting birthday gifts?

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andhination
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Insulting birthday gifts? 2009-10-01 17:08:50 Reply

You guys all get an insulting gift for peoples birthdays right?
Like, you all get the real presents, but then you get something which is insulting.
For example, the at this kid who gets called a chink (his eyes are sorta slanty but he's english) birthday, we got him a dickload of fortune cookies. At the gingers birthday, we got him a Fireman Sam Video.

Sounds sad, but we're all saddos here so shhhh

Anyhow, there's a guys birthday coming up and his skit is "Jew" (Jewish surname) and I can't figure on anything to get him based on that, just give him money and he won't get it.
I COULD go to some obscure jewish shop and get him some jewish artifact or something, but I don't think there are any shops round here for that, so any other ideas?


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Yiffy
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Response to Insulting birthday gifts? 2009-10-01 17:10:49 Reply

Give him a bag full of gold, then take it.


So zetta slow!

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pinkfuzzyman
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Response to Insulting birthday gifts? 2009-10-01 17:13:13 Reply

A bag of chocolate coins.


none

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Kiryuku
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Response to Insulting birthday gifts? 2009-10-01 17:13:24 Reply

Get him a penny, but when you give it to him say "Hey look a penny!" then chuck it across the room and see if he dives for it.


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CapnCrunchDaPimp
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Response to Insulting birthday gifts? 2009-10-01 17:14:32 Reply

Those are pretty funny. Cruel, but funny. As for the Jew, ask him if he wants orange jews. Take him to a nice store and buy something he would love that's expensive but keep it for yourself, and give the lady a tip for extra points. Then go out to a diner and eat bacon.

AlphaCentauri
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Response to Insulting birthday gifts? 2009-10-01 17:15:08 Reply

Get him a Yamaka.

Insulting birthday gifts?


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smeagol1
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Response to Insulting birthday gifts? 2009-10-01 17:15:59 Reply

Give him an Easy Bake Oven. Always worked for me.


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andhination
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Response to Insulting birthday gifts? 2009-10-01 17:22:06 Reply

At 10/1/09 05:15 PM, AlphaCentauri wrote: Get him a Yamaka.

That was my first thought, but I don't know anywhere I can buy them, and I can't be arsed with my mum asking why a Yamaka turned up in the post if I order it online.
I liked the Bacon idea, something like that could be good.


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urbn
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Response to Insulting birthday gifts? 2009-10-01 17:23:43 Reply

Write him a massive check and then bounce it.


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elcriz000
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Response to Insulting birthday gifts? 2009-10-01 17:25:09 Reply

give him a pic of he Holocaust

that will work great

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Yhtomit
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Response to Insulting birthday gifts? 2009-10-01 17:25:41 Reply

Well, once, for Christmas, I got a present from my auntie. A book, called "I Can Draw Cartoons". Yes, I can draw cartoons, and that is why I don't need a book, called "I Can Draw Cartoons".

Yhtomit
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Response to Insulting birthday gifts? 2009-10-01 17:27:13 Reply

At 10/1/09 05:25 PM, Yhtomit wrote: Well, once, for Christmas, I got a present from my auntie. A book, called "I Can Draw Cartoons". Yes, I can draw cartoons, and that is why I don't need a book, called "I Can Draw Cartoons".

Sorry, didn't finish. You should find some thing he's really good at, and then give him a copy of "The Dummies Guide" to that topic, or just a "Beginner's manual" or something like that.

Thegluestickman
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Response to Insulting birthday gifts? 2009-10-01 17:27:17 Reply

Get him some pennies or a huge joke glasses thing with a huge nose.

Insulting birthday gifts?


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Erty
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Response to Insulting birthday gifts? 2009-10-01 17:27:36 Reply

Give him a movie from Walt Disney!

Everyone knows he hated jews.

Bananular.

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TheSporkLord
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Response to Insulting birthday gifts? 2009-10-01 17:30:21 Reply

hilarity will ensue

Insulting birthday gifts?


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Sensationalism
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Response to Insulting birthday gifts? 2009-10-01 17:31:25 Reply

Give him a pamphlet for a nose job.


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Response to Insulting birthday gifts? 2009-10-01 18:12:50 Reply

get him a circumscition

WIN
LocoJoe
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Response to Insulting birthday gifts? 2009-10-01 18:15:38 Reply

You know who this is for.

Insulting birthday gifts?


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Scarface
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Response to Insulting birthday gifts? 2009-10-01 18:18:52 Reply

At 10/1/09 05:27 PM, Thegluestickman wrote: Get him some pennies or a huge joke glasses thing with a huge nose.

The correct term is Groucho Glasses, because Groucho Marx kicked fucking ass!


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Scarface
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Response to Insulting birthday gifts? 2009-10-01 18:20:25 Reply

At 10/1/09 06:15 PM, FatJoe214 wrote: You know who this is for.

Barack Obama? Remember, once you go Barack, you never go back!


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armorwarrior
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Response to Insulting birthday gifts? 2009-10-01 18:20:26 Reply

So wait... The guy is jewish right? Have his mom give him a picture of Hitler and say, "I just wanted you to know who your real father was."

You could just print off this picture if you want.

Insulting birthday gifts?


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6r0undZ3r0
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Response to Insulting birthday gifts? 2009-10-01 19:30:54 Reply

At 10/1/09 05:15 PM, smeagol1 wrote: Give him an Easy Bake Oven. Always worked for me.

This is an amazing idea.


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ryanboy8
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Response to Insulting birthday gifts? 2009-10-01 19:33:09 Reply

I'll mail you a Jew Amulet if you want.

(P.S. I'm not a Jew. My grandma was.)


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Response to Insulting birthday gifts? 2009-10-01 19:40:26 Reply

Give him a bag full of rare commemorative pennies.

it's racist AND useful

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Haloya
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Response to Insulting birthday gifts? 2009-10-01 20:56:12 Reply

He would love one of these

Insulting birthday gifts?


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spaceharrier1987
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Response to Insulting birthday gifts? 2009-10-01 21:02:23 Reply

Don't insult him. I once got a razor for Christmas from one of my sisters. Buy him a wrench. I had this crazy Lao Tzu beard.

DaveGuy
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Response to Insulting birthday gifts? 2009-10-01 21:04:59 Reply

throw him a barmitsfa (if he is under 13) or just wait until he turns 13 to throw one.

WeirdJamFace
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Response to Insulting birthday gifts? 2009-10-01 21:08:52 Reply

Chop off his whole penis and say you only meant to chip off the top.

durr hurrrr.....

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Blush
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Response to Insulting birthday gifts? 2009-10-01 21:14:24 Reply

I once got my black friend a basket of KFC chicken and a bottle of grape soda.


R.I.P Kitty Krew ;_; and also cock joke.

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tox
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Response to Insulting birthday gifts? 2009-10-01 21:16:23 Reply

get him a penny... GET HIM A PENNY!!!! but super glue it to the page.


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