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You guys all get an insulting gift for peoples birthdays right?
Like, you all get the real presents, but then you get something which is insulting.
For example, the at this kid who gets called a chink (his eyes are sorta slanty but he's english) birthday, we got him a dickload of fortune cookies. At the gingers birthday, we got him a Fireman Sam Video.
Sounds sad, but we're all saddos here so shhhh
Anyhow, there's a guys birthday coming up and his skit is "Jew" (Jewish surname) and I can't figure on anything to get him based on that, just give him money and he won't get it.
I COULD go to some obscure jewish shop and get him some jewish artifact or something, but I don't think there are any shops round here for that, so any other ideas?
Get him a penny, but when you give it to him say "Hey look a penny!" then chuck it across the room and see if he dives for it.
Those are pretty funny. Cruel, but funny. As for the Jew, ask him if he wants orange jews. Take him to a nice store and buy something he would love that's expensive but keep it for yourself, and give the lady a tip for extra points. Then go out to a diner and eat bacon.
At 10/1/09 05:15 PM, AlphaCentauri wrote: Get him a Yamaka.
That was my first thought, but I don't know anywhere I can buy them, and I can't be arsed with my mum asking why a Yamaka turned up in the post if I order it online.
I liked the Bacon idea, something like that could be good.
give him a pic of he Holocaust
that will work great
Iron man is a superhero
Iron woman is a command
Well, once, for Christmas, I got a present from my auntie. A book, called "I Can Draw Cartoons". Yes, I can draw cartoons, and that is why I don't need a book, called "I Can Draw Cartoons".
At 10/1/09 05:25 PM, Yhtomit wrote: Well, once, for Christmas, I got a present from my auntie. A book, called "I Can Draw Cartoons". Yes, I can draw cartoons, and that is why I don't need a book, called "I Can Draw Cartoons".
Sorry, didn't finish. You should find some thing he's really good at, and then give him a copy of "The Dummies Guide" to that topic, or just a "Beginner's manual" or something like that.
Give him a pamphlet for a nose job.
The sig that I'm wearin? Awesomely made by Skaren!
Also, I like annoying Americans by calling English football "real football" and American football "rugby".-Lost-Chances
get him a circumscition
At 10/1/09 05:27 PM, Thegluestickman wrote: Get him some pennies or a huge joke glasses thing with a huge nose.
The correct term is Groucho Glasses, because Groucho Marx kicked fucking ass!
So wait... The guy is jewish right? Have his mom give him a picture of Hitler and say, "I just wanted you to know who your real father was."
You could just print off this picture if you want.
At 10/1/09 05:15 PM, smeagol1 wrote: Give him an Easy Bake Oven. Always worked for me.
This is an amazing idea.
Give him a bag full of rare commemorative pennies.
it's racist AND useful
|"My dick was in the Guinness Boom of World Records... Then I left the library.|
Don't insult him. I once got a razor for Christmas from one of my sisters. Buy him a wrench. I had this crazy Lao Tzu beard.
Chop off his whole penis and say you only meant to chip off the top.
Why yes, that IS a large collection of 1998 "Smithy's Favourite Times" Licenced Cereal Pop Toys!