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Holy fuck. Almost kidnapped.

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Danopus
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Holy fuck. Almost kidnapped. Jul. 8th, 2009 @ 12:21 PM

So, as i was walking home from school today, i got a taste of the great british weather. Rain. Now, being the ignorant person i am, i didn't actually bother watching the weather forecast. I saw a nice, shiny gold car slowly approach me, with a particularly shady looking fellow in. "Want a ride?" He questioned. The "STRANGA DANGER" Sirens went off in my head. So, i simply stated "Fuck no."

After that, the man frowned, and i ran as fast as i could, back to my house, which thankfully was very close. The car sped up to follow me, and i fumbled to unlock the door. I hopped inside, and locked the door, as the man exited his car. I leant against the door, listening to him asking me to come outside, as he had a 'present' in his car. I walked into the kitchen, a devious plan forming. I grabbed some Tabasco (Damn, i love that stuff) and poured it into one of those spray bottles (The ones for disciplining cats, and watering plants). I pressed opened the letterbox, and said "Hey, dickweed! Down here." I saw his face lower down to the letterbox to greet me. As soon as he was at eye level, i said "Here's my present, asshole." And i sprayed him with Tabasco. "Now get outta here before i call the police".

Bitch raaaan.


I ran. I ran until my muscles burned, and my veins pumped battery acid. Then I ran some more.

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gamemaster93
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Response to Holy fuck. Almost kidnapped. Jul. 8th, 2009 @ 12:23 PM

What a waste of Tabasco.


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UnreaK745
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Response to Holy fuck. Almost kidnapped. Jul. 8th, 2009 @ 12:24 PM

Nice story, homeboy.


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Visit my page, cocksuckah.

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The-Hitman
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Response to Holy fuck. Almost kidnapped. Jul. 8th, 2009 @ 12:24 PM

Well if you would quit wearing that provocative latex outfit, I'd quit following you.

I only ran home to get my taco I had in the fridge, I love Tabasco sauce.
aquaticmole
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Response to Holy fuck. Almost kidnapped. Jul. 8th, 2009 @ 12:25 PM

He was going to give you a present, You're an asshole.


aquaticmole.

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Alpharius120
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Response to Holy fuck. Almost kidnapped. Jul. 8th, 2009 @ 12:25 PM

I feel strangely compelled not to believe this story.


Hey yo

Danopus
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Response to Holy fuck. Almost kidnapped. Jul. 8th, 2009 @ 12:25 PM

At 7/8/09 12:25 PM, Alpharius120 wrote: I feel strangely compelled not to believe this story.

Beleive what you wish. It's true though.


I ran. I ran until my muscles burned, and my veins pumped battery acid. Then I ran some more.

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Spiff
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Response to Holy fuck. Almost kidnapped. Jul. 8th, 2009 @ 12:26 PM

At 7/8/09 12:23 PM, gamemaster93 wrote: What a waste of Tabasco.

I totally agree with this. One time I spilt Tobasco on my arm and it actually left a small burn mark. Not good times.


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Danopus
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Response to Holy fuck. Almost kidnapped. Jul. 8th, 2009 @ 12:28 PM

At 7/8/09 12:26 PM, Spiff wrote:
At 7/8/09 12:23 PM, gamemaster93 wrote: What a waste of Tabasco.
I totally agree with this. One time I spilt Tobasco on my arm and it actually left a small burn mark. Not good times.

It actually burns you? Damn, now i feel sorry for that sexual predator.


I ran. I ran until my muscles burned, and my veins pumped battery acid. Then I ran some more.

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kamelona
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Response to Holy fuck. Almost kidnapped. Jul. 8th, 2009 @ 12:31 PM

Ok Macaulay Culkin, whatever you say


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Lamar537
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Response to Holy fuck. Almost kidnapped. Jul. 8th, 2009 @ 12:46 PM

Why does this sound strangely like the Home Alone movies?


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Jercurpac
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Response to Holy fuck. Almost kidnapped. Jul. 8th, 2009 @ 12:47 PM

Please keep works of fiction in your profile.


Happy with what you have to be happy with
you have to be happy with what you have
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