The elusive snacker

[Fox]

Here I am, sitting in front of my computer on Newgrounds, late at night. Everybody else is sleeping, and I'm in the mood for a midnight snack. As the anti-health nut I am, I choose to indulge. The lights are out and you can hear a pin drop in this dead of night. This is no issue for me, as I have embarked on the quest for food countless times before.

I start by opening my bedroom door to reveal the pitch-black hallway most definitely lined with tricks and traps. I tiptoe down the hallway, careful not to wake my younger siblings. My sixth sense guides me past the shoes and toys and around the laundry and junk. I arrive at the kitchen, only a few feet away from my parents' bedroom. Like a ninja I open the fridge, claim my prize, and shut it just as fast, careful not too let the light from it escape the kitchen. I then swiftly open the cabinet, taking more to improve my snack.

Every voyage must have its obstacles, as the creaking of the cabinet door must have awoken the family cat. The greedy feline demands that I share my treat, or suffer the consequences. We stare each other down for what seemed like an eternity before she made the first move. She sits down, and lets out a loud MUURRRROOOOOW! "Shit," I thought to myself. She means business! MEEEEEEOOOOOWWW she goes again. All this effort, all the discreet creaking of doors and crinkling of plastic is not going to be for naught! I think quick to silence the hungry pussycat. I grab the can of kitty treats, drop a few in her direction, and make my dashing escape, not looking back at all.

Luckily I make it safely back to my room, thanking god that I didn't wake a single person, despite coming dangerously close. I'm sitting here, catching my breath and counting my blessings. I have truly turned stealthy snacking into an art form and I am proud of it.

Now Newgrounds, feast with me on my bounty of cheese, crackers, and mountain dew!

[DM692]

At 5/16/09 01:40 AM, Fox wrote: Like a ninja I open the fridge, claim my prize, and shut it just as fast, careful not too let the light from it escape the kitchen.

You moved faster than the speed of light, yet silently, and were able to get something from the fridge?

HOLY SHIT!

[Keven11Twenty7]

Nice...

[WeHaveFreshCookies]

Dr. Pepper is WAAAAY better than Mountain Dew. Unless you have Dr. Pepper, I shall not rejoice.

[RyanTime2]

Good job. Now let me have some.

[MultiCanimefan]

You better have enough to last us for the night, otherwise you're on the couch.

[Darkar]

Wow... I feel exhausted now. You should train people for this.

[Fox]

At 5/16/09 02:07 AM, MultiCanimefan wrote: You better have enough to last us for the night, otherwise you're on the couch.

Damn, I'll have to go get some more.

[CapnCrunchDaPimp]

Sounds good bro. Nice little narrative you wrote there, I feel that way every single weekend when I rummage through a dark kitchen for Mountain Dew and Doritos. Also, if we have them, I make Hot Pockets or Ramen, which is an even more difficult task to accomplish.

[Deadchick]

Crackers eh? No cookies? Awww : <

[gibleto]

If I eat this late, heartburn is sure to come.

[Reckon]

Whoa!

[Generalissimus]

Congrats, your story entertained me. Good job.

[Jonners]

I've never had a real midnight snack, I almost never wake up in the middle of the night until about 3 or 4am, and then im usually not hungry and I drift off again.

I really am missing out by the sound of it.

[Pepperfrog]

Omg, you are my hero.