I can't pee standing up

[SpikeAlpha]

I don't know why this has happened to me. Just a few days ago, I was a regular boy with dreams of growing up normally. Lately, every time I try to take a nice relaxing piss, the urine just goes on my legs and down to my feet. This problem has gotten me into all sorts of problems in public. In bathrooms, the other guys just stare judgementally, and I know they're just thinking that I'm not a good uninator. In the locker rooms all my teemmates continuously stare at my crotch, sometimes taking pictures or asking if they can touch my disfigured genitals. It was even worse when I went to the doctors, and I was treated like a little girl. I was so scared, and they wouldn't even try a CAT scan.

I feel so depressed, and I don't know what to do. When I tried to google my problem, the peoples just tell me silly answers to my serious problem. They told me to put on a dress, and stick to bathroom relations. Help me, Newgrounds Forum Regulars.

[lnstinct]

you're a girl

now fuck off

[BlackPlastic]

Peeing standing up is a defining feature of a man. Sorry, but you're a woman.

[SpikeAlpha]

At 4/18/09 09:29 AM, lnstinct wrote: you're a girl

now fuck off

What? That's rediculous! I've been a boy all my life! I'm staring at my naked body right now. I'm growing a full mustache, I have no breasts. My body is unnaturaly hairless, but that has nothing to do with a person's sex!

[Jonners]

At 4/18/09 09:29 AM, lnstinct wrote: you're a girl

now fuck off

A girl on NG? Hah, you make me laugh!

[esko-man]

They make glory-holes for a reason you know..

[Fim]

I feel bad for you girl

[AnEmoDragon]

You probably haz a medical issue, something the people on here can't solve :). Or you just turned gay.

[Shreddy]

At 4/18/09 09:26 AM, SpikeAlpha wrote: Lately, every time I try to take a nice relaxing piss, the urine just goes on my legs and down to my feet.

try aiming abit?! :|

asking if they can touch my disfigured genitals.

wait... what? whats up with them?

[MrFrizzleFry]

It's called a STD. I sure it is a symptom of one of them.

[InsertFunnyUserName]

Try peeing into a funnel.

It's what I do.

[killer32]

its beacuse something is stuck inside your dick

[googlerox]

At 4/18/09 09:41 AM, killer32 wrote: its beacuse something is stuck inside your dick

example?

[ismellarat]

The answer to all of your problems.

[killer32]

there could have been dick hair stuck inside the dickhole

[Jack]

You're a lady or a man-lady.

Now get that fine ass in the kitchen and make us some dinner!

I want ribs.

[Khris]

....do you have a penis

[dx5231]

At 4/18/09 09:26 AM, SpikeAlpha wrote: Help me, Newgrounds Forum Regulars.

Newgrounds isn't the best place to ask about shit like that. People will start acting stupidly.

[bravo22]

Did you cut you're penis off?

[leeteet]

At 4/18/09 09:26 AM, SpikeAlpha wrote: In the locker rooms all my teemmates continuously stare at my crotch, sometimes taking pictures or asking if they can touch my disfigured genitals.

And.. do you let em to touch your pee pee? Show me where they touched you with this doll.

[Conspiracy3]

Point your dick straight up into the air

[evan210]

At 4/18/09 09:36 AM, Jonners wrote:

At 4/18/09 09:29 AM, lnstinct wrote: you're a girl

now fuck off

A girl on NG? Hah, you make me laugh!

So that makes him... neuter.

[onilink19]

i cant tell if you are joking or serious.
if you post a pic, sickly enough, i may believe. other than that it could be ED Erectile Dysfunction, alot of guys wind up with some form of an ED. Tha or a tumor could be blocking off your uretha.

[Conspiracy3]

At 4/18/09 10:53 AM, onilink19 wrote: i cant tell if you are joking or serious.
if you post a pic, sickly enough, i may believe. other than that it could be ED Erectile Dysfunction, alot of guys wind up with some form of an ED. Tha or a tumor could be blocking off your uretha.

ED means either staying hard too long or not being able to get hard at all. That has nothing to do with pissing in a straight line.

[ifureadthisdie]

At 4/18/09 09:36 AM, Jonners wrote:

At 4/18/09 09:29 AM, lnstinct wrote: you're a girl

now fuck off

A girl on NG? Hah, you make me laugh!

Jade's gonna kill you

also I'm pretty sure you're a woman.

[Arthuria99]

Have you check it to doctor, yet? it's quite serious if you can't do it in right way
a man should pee while standing up

[CapnCrunchDaPimp]

I sit down when I pee! There aint nothing crazy about me!

[Conspiracy3]

At 4/18/09 11:59 AM, Eggys wrote: Oh well. At least you can read a book while taking your pisses.

I always read a book when I piss standing up.

I always piss standing up when I read a book.

Poor librarian always having to clean it up.

[Scarface]

At 4/18/09 09:26 AM, SpikeAlpha wrote: I don't know why this has happened to me. Just a few days ago, I was a regular boy with dreams of growing up normally. Lately, every time I try to take a nice relaxing piss, the urine just goes on my legs and down to my feet. This problem has gotten me into all sorts of problems in public. In bathrooms, the other guys just stare judgementally, and I know they're just thinking that I'm not a good uninator. In the locker rooms all my teemmates continuously stare at my crotch, sometimes taking pictures or asking if they can touch my disfigured genitals. It was even worse when I went to the doctors, and I was treated like a little girl. I was so scared, and they wouldn't even try a CAT scan.

I feel so depressed, and I don't know what to do. When I tried to google my problem, the peoples just tell me silly answers to my serious problem. They told me to put on a dress, and stick to bathroom relations. Help me, Newgrounds Forum Regulars.

I am really sorry that this happened to you. Don't listen to any of these jackasses. They sure as fucking hell wouldn't be laughing if this happened to them. I'm gonna actually try to help, okay? So, as disgusting as this sounds, grab your...........fire hose......lift it up, and try to aim it towards the toilet. It's natural, lot's of people have to do it. You are not a woman.

[onilink19]

At 4/18/09 12:04 PM, Conspiracy3 wrote:

At 4/18/09 11:59 AM, Eggys wrote: Oh well. At least you can read a book while taking your pisses.

I always read a book when I piss standing up.

I always piss standing up when I read a book.

Poor librarian always having to clean it up.

nice.