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Frame the ducks by putting the weapons and stuff in the ducks mouth. Tell them you were quietly eating your sammich when the ducks committed their crime.

At 3/19/09 11:03 PM, BobbaQ wrote: I was tempted to make a thread entitled "You are surrounded by hamsters" but thought better of it after seeing a similar thread get wiped from exsistance. I'd eat the sandwich.

I have a better idea

"You are surrounded by sandwiches"

Put my hands up and wonder why the fuck I had a ham sandwich in my possession.

At 3/19/09 10:36 PM, WATCHurFLAG wrote:

At 3/19/09 10:35 PM, Hakuyo wrote: Take the knife put it to my neck and say don't come any closer or I will kill myself. I would cut myself a little to show I am not joking. I really think it will work because they can't let you kill yourself.

*cough* Emo! *cough*

HAHAHAHA! Nope I was just thinking about how they get hostages so then I was thinking about when cops have to stop someone from killing themself sooooo pop them together it might work.

At 3/19/09 10:32 PM, Maverick-Alex wrote: Blame the ducks.
Eat sandwich.
Jump the rope.
Knife a hobo.
Walk into the sunset.

That is the most beautiful ending I have ever seen

if they were indeed ninja cops, there wouldn't even be time to eat the sandwich.

But if I were surrounded by cops...knowing me...it would be a mistake, so i'd go quietly...

while eating that tasty sandwich.

I cut the rope in half with the knife and tie the 1 duck to my left arm and the other to my right and fly away to the safehouse and have a little snack on the way

Eat the sandwich to activate my superpower of Mega-focus (Matrix-like concentration), decapitate the ducks, throw them in the air (to get the police to look up), then kill them one by one, Matrix style.

Or maybe more like V for Vendetta style.

Take the ducks as hostages, and demand another sandwich.

If I have ducks, it would probably only be because I stole them from Bob, holding him up with a knife. And then took his sammich for good measure, right?

In any case, I would put my hands up... It would be stupid not to.

I would cut the ham sandwich in half and watch the police cry. While they are wiping their eyes, poof, I quickly replace myself with the two ducks and ninja out of there. Meanwhile, back at the hall of justice, I have another ham sandwich waiting for me.

Drop all this shit in my hands and fuckin run!

Use the ham on the sandwch to atrract the nearest fat cop and hold him hostage then take his gun and put it to his head using him as a human shield shoot the ducks and run then use the rope to tie fatty to a tree.

Announce that the ducks are filled with explosives and that you have the detonator. Then tie the knife to the end of the rope. Throw the ducks towards the police and then chuck the knife rope into the bottom of the helicopter and into the co-pilots head. Climb up the rope and while flipping into the helicopter drop kick the pilot out. Enjoy your sandwich while escaping over the horizon.

Tie the rope to the ducks neck.
Then i would make my move and use the duck as a blunt object to take the impact of the bullets.
I would then proceed to fight the remaining cops with my duck rope and knife combo.

Once the cops are taken care of, eat the sandwich in the helicopter.

Offer them the sandwich if I can go free.

Run out screaming

"I'M SORRY, I DIDN'T MEAN TO TAKE THOSE PENS"

Alright, everyone's plans have sucked ass. Here's your BEST BET.

First off, HAM? Eww . . .

It goes to the ducks.

The knife? I will wait with it, holding it non-menacingly, frozen in place as I slowly feed ducks the sandwich. I will not let go of the knife. The cops will continue to close in on me as I feed the ducks and hold the knife. Eventually, they will get sick of waiting and taser me, at which point I spaz the knife into my arm and collapse. The ducks run away because of my sudden drop.

Yay.

The police just followed standard procedure but the entire news media saw it, and people are morons who are easily swayed by their emotions. My kindly gesture of feeding ducks makes me appear innocent, and public oppinion is on my side. Now, when I go to trial, I'll be countering the unspecified suit with police brutality, because they shouldn't've tasered me, even though I know that they should.

I win excellent PR, and likely a lot of money. Epic. Fucking. Win.

You have a rope, a knife, two ducks, and a ham sandwich

What do you do?

Duck twice, cut the rope, eat the sandwich.

BOOM

At 3/20/09 02:32 AM, Dossfilm wrote:

You have a rope, a knife, two ducks, and a ham sandwich

What do you do?

Duck twice, cut the rope, eat the sandwich.

BOOM

Oh shit i forgot about the cops... uhm Run... run my ass off...

I would hit up, down, left, right, left, right, A, B, select to activate god mode.

At 3/20/09 03:22 AM, FurryFox wrote: I would hit up, down, left, right, left, right, A, B, select to activate god mode.

You can only activate god mode if it is a turkey sandwich. If you hit up, down, left, right, left, right, a, b, and select while holding a ham sandwich you will activate zombie mode.

Tie up the 2 ducks with the rope and threaten to kill them as hostages unless the cops... leave me alone.

Step 1: Eat sandwich.
Step 2: Drop everything and surrender.
Step 3: ?????
Step 4: PROFIT!

Tie the rope around the knife, spin around which will make the knife start going too, once its gone fast enough the knife will cut every cop while still going in the circular motion, after every cop is dead run away and enjoy your ham sandwich.

cut the sandwitch with the knife and give it to all the cops and then put your hands up. Then you'll be able to prove yourself out of jail because you did nothing wrong

Eat the sandwich which will give me terrible gas and allow me to repel everyone around me in a huge radius with my explosive flatulence. Then tether myself to the two ducks (which I'm sure are the size of large cars) and fly into the sunset!

and use the knife to cut my beard which I would have grown from the AWESOME.

Show the cops how to make the party selection duck and ham sandwich, get the knife, add the ducks to the sandwich, cut the sandwich into several pieces, and then tie the rope between the pieces. It makes a fun party game and snack. Then let the police try it, and then put my hands up and get arrested and be released and watch myself on tv.

Cut myself to pieces with the knife, then I rope myself together in the form of a slice of ham.

I then remove the ham from the Sandvich, and place myself in there.

The cops will come over to inspect, but find nothing except a ham Sandvich.

They will then leave the area, and after that I ask my ducks to put me back together.

Eat one of the ducks, then shove the other one inside the sandwich and sit on it until the red gravy comes out of the peking and eat that.