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Help Me Get Back On This Kid

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WildfireHedgehog
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Help Me Get Back On This Kid 2009-03-18 21:42:17 Reply

Okay, so a few weeks ago, this kid actually snuck into my house, around 3 AM, and urinated on my basement sofa.

I am dead fucking serious.

Now, at first, I knew it was him, because I pissed him off earlier, 'cause he was being racist to white people and made really bad 'your mom' jokes, so me and my friends told him to fuck off.

Now, this kid is not like a normal kid.

He's fucked up, and he's not mentally disabled, he's a fucking moron. He actually believes in some sort of 'social ladder', and refers to some people as the 'cool, popular, kids.' The reason not many people like him is because he's a shit talker and a fucking liar. Plus, he always has this smirkish attitude torwards me. He has exposed his dick and balls to me numerous times, kissed me on top of the head when I wasn't looking, and wiped feces on my cheek when I was sleeping at his sister's party.

Now, I told him I'd get my revenge, but not tell him when, to keep him in fear.

What should I do?

Valjylmyr
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Response to Help Me Get Back On This Kid 2009-03-18 21:43:56 Reply

You know nothing in that story sounds believable?

As for revenge, kill his family. He deserves it, since it's clear he doesn't exist.


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memyselfandurmom
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Response to Help Me Get Back On This Kid 2009-03-18 21:44:02 Reply

rick roll him. DUH?!


My name is Michael. How are you today? :)

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Proottalfain
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Response to Help Me Get Back On This Kid 2009-03-18 21:44:17 Reply

He's lovely, except for the feces on your cheek and piss on your sofa.

I'd like to meet him.

NAO!


My signature was old so I changed it.

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Magical-Zorse
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Response to Help Me Get Back On This Kid 2009-03-18 21:44:18 Reply

Take a shit in his mouth when he's sleeping


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Civilnotice
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Response to Help Me Get Back On This Kid 2009-03-18 21:44:37 Reply

At 3/18/09 09:42 PM, WildfireHedgehog wrote: Urinated on my basement sofa ... exposed his dick and balls to me numerous times, kissed me on top of the head when I wasn't looking, and wiped feces on my cheek when I was sleeping at his sister's party.

This kid is my hero.


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Truth
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Response to Help Me Get Back On This Kid 2009-03-18 21:45:02 Reply

At 3/18/09 09:43 PM, Valjylmyr wrote: You know nothing in that story sounds believable?

As for revenge, kill his family. He deserves it, since it's clear he doesn't exist.

Leave this topic, authorities are being contacted.

Elios
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Response to Help Me Get Back On This Kid 2009-03-18 21:47:41 Reply

In all seriousness, here's what you should do.

First off, go buy yourself a bamboo cane.

For the next five years, randomly pick days that you will find him, and cane him in the knees. He will never know you're coming, he will always be alert, and he will fear your bamboo cane.

Tell him "You fuck with me, or anything that concerns me, i will bamboo you, bitch."


Do what now...?

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TheLameSauce
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Response to Help Me Get Back On This Kid 2009-03-18 21:49:51 Reply

get his sister pregnant and never be there for the kid.

notsneaky
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Response to Help Me Get Back On This Kid 2009-03-18 21:51:36 Reply

well i say its time to blackmail him with that picture butters

Help Me Get Back On This Kid


Awesome

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xscoot
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Response to Help Me Get Back On This Kid 2009-03-18 21:51:45 Reply

As your title implies, you want to "get back on this kid".

I just wanted to put that out.


My PSN ID is xscoot. Crazy, huh?

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TimeLordX
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Response to Help Me Get Back On This Kid 2009-03-18 22:47:59 Reply

Maybe a prank? Like TPing his front yard while he sleeps or something.


Find your own answers and you'll stop beliving the propoganda

SatanHam
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Response to Help Me Get Back On This Kid 2009-03-18 22:52:17 Reply

piss on his sofa.


the picture/information posted above; is at least somewhat relevant to this topic.

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RedDreadSky
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Response to Help Me Get Back On This Kid 2009-03-18 22:55:14 Reply

Humiliation over pain. Next time your at like a party, make sure he's asleep first, and jack off into a cup. Spread it all over his face, and enjoy your revenge.


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CapnCrunchDaPimp
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Response to Help Me Get Back On This Kid 2009-03-18 22:57:52 Reply

Wait, you want to get back on this kid? Like, buttsex? I don't think I could help you with that buddy.

SatanHam
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Response to Help Me Get Back On This Kid 2009-03-18 22:58:03 Reply

At 3/18/09 10:55 PM, RedDreadSky wrote: Humiliation over pain. Next time your at like a party, make sure he's asleep first, and jack off into a cup. Spread it all over his face, and enjoy your revenge.

y dont u just jack off onto his face?
:/


the picture/information posted above; is at least somewhat relevant to this topic.

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Cordyceps
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Response to Help Me Get Back On This Kid 2009-03-18 23:00:05 Reply

At 3/18/09 09:47 PM, Elios wrote: For the next five years, randomly pick days that you will find him, and cane him in the knees. He will never know you're coming, he will always be alert, and he will fear your bamboo cane.

Tell him "You fuck with me, or anything that concerns me, i will bamboo you, bitch."

I believe you win an internet, my good sir.

mrpwnzer
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Response to Help Me Get Back On This Kid 2009-03-18 23:01:26 Reply

Take a crap on his mom's car

Get out a BB gun or something

when he's in the neighborhood, run at him with a chainsaw. I'm serious. One time my neighbor's daughters boyfriend was pissing me off. When I saw his car, I went to the garage, got a chainsaw, and ran at him laughing hysterically. The boy has been scared crapless and hasn't been around for quite some time :D


Xbox live: C0n Queso
PSN: A-Spiky-Kitten
Steam: Baby Diesel

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vai90
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Response to Help Me Get Back On This Kid 2009-03-18 23:13:30 Reply

At 3/18/09 09:45 PM, Truth wrote:
At 3/18/09 09:43 PM, Valjylmyr wrote: You know nothing in that story sounds believable?

As for revenge, kill his family. He deserves it, since it's clear he doesn't exist.
Leave this topic, authorities are being contacted.

I lol'd.

commander22
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Response to Help Me Get Back On This Kid 2009-03-18 23:57:13 Reply

Go to his house,
urinate in his frige (or on/in his PC),
put gaz everywhere (but don't lite it, that's different) you just want the smell especialy in fabrics,
superglue all his inside doors (sometimes just the key hole works)
spread as much feces as you can
ans screw his door in (quietly) while he's sleeping

For this, get 5 guys ready to do it, that won't squeal!

You could also do the bamboo thing before you leave.

Do you want to live for ever!
I do so ATTACK!

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HandsomePete
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Response to Help Me Get Back On This Kid 2009-03-19 00:00:02 Reply

Sounds like a serial killer. Let it go.


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Kilgorn
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Response to Help Me Get Back On This Kid 2009-03-19 00:00:15 Reply

sneak into his house at three am and rape him and his entire family to death. Be a man, do eet


I will cut your lips and tongue from your head with a... LINOLEUM KNIFE!

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commander22
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Response to Help Me Get Back On This Kid 2009-03-19 00:05:07 Reply

sneak into his house at three am and rape him and his entire family to death. Be a man, do eet

No, that's gay


Do you want to live for ever!
I do so ATTACK!

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ragingfred
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Response to Help Me Get Back On This Kid 2009-03-19 00:08:47 Reply

post death threats written in blood, who's blood, that's the best part! that'll keep him in check as long as he doesn't find out you're writing them.

killslasher
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Response to Help Me Get Back On This Kid 2009-03-19 00:10:33 Reply

Now that kid would piss me off so much. I value properties, a lot. I would fucking paralyze that bitch.
Though, you can shit in a cup(2girls1cup, except not sexually), run over to his house at night, and dump it in his face, while he sleeps. Then you can piss on as much SURFACE AREA as you can. Now it's important that you spread it out a lot, so it covers almost all of what's in the room. That is if you're that serious.
If you want something lighter, grab a lot of stones and the next day, throw the stones at him ALL DAY LONG. For long as you want. Or the bamboo idea works well. Or you can punch him in the face, scream some nonsense, and run away laughing.
I was serious about the first idea though, if he pissed on my couch, or wiped shit on me...

Zombified
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Response to Help Me Get Back On This Kid 2009-03-19 00:43:19 Reply

Call the cops on him and laugh your ass off when the cops arrest him for pissing on your sofa.


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Judzfell
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Response to Help Me Get Back On This Kid 2009-03-19 00:45:29 Reply

You should dig a 6 foot hole for him.

that'll show him

b

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Stormlordrox
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Response to Help Me Get Back On This Kid 2009-03-19 02:07:40 Reply

if you can get your hands on some, wait until he's asleep and then shove fire ants up his ass, then superglue it shut. Oh, and agitate them first.


Fallopian Jubes. There, I said it.

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xBloodxFacex
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Response to Help Me Get Back On This Kid 2009-03-19 02:13:03 Reply

At 3/19/09 02:07 AM, Stormlordrox wrote: if you can get your hands on some, wait until he's asleep and then shove fire ants up his ass, then superglue it shut. Oh, and agitate them first.

oooo your dark my friend your dark

Me-Patch
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Response to Help Me Get Back On This Kid 2009-03-19 02:17:47 Reply

At 3/18/09 09:42 PM, WildfireHedgehog wrote: Okay, so a few weeks ago, this kid actually snuck into my house, around 3 AM, and urinated on my basement sofa.

I am dead fucking serious.

Thats funny. Some kid marked his territory on your couch. Now you have to fight him or the pride might abandon you to fend for yourself in the wild.


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